Any Of Ya'll With A Man Who People Would Objectively Say Is Better Looking Than You?

[CoilyFields]

My dh is better looking. I'm not far behind but I'm pretty average.

I've never really thought about it much. No one has ever pointed it out or implied it.

But i also know that he truly was an equal opportunity dater. The women he dated ranged from hot to straight ugly, from toned brick houses to completely fat. Maybe that's why i never felt insecure, because I've always known he wasn't "settling" or concerned about my looks or lack thereof.

 

[Kindheart]

I never really dated someone better looking for some reason . I like to be catered to like a queen and those types are not the ones that would do that .Besides ,often times they have a lot of female friends around waiting in the backburner,they re used to attention and can't let go of it .
Average looking,financially secure ,kind and giving is my type

 

[Kindheart]

Men do this alllll the time.

Actually I think people do it. Attractive people can be very insecure. Fragile egos too. Well people are insecure but looks tend to give people's behavior away....

Men will go after a woman they know can't do better than him. Esp in the looks category. That's why you see cougars and fat chicks at male strip club. Men also know that these women are also insecure and go after outwardly attractive men because they have something to prove like they can get the hot guy. Then they'll stay with him and ready to beat a btch down over him. Think Denzel and Pauletta.

Actually when I see an attractive man with a plain Jane it makes sense to me. All I see is a likely cheating trfling man and a beaming plain Jane who thinks she finally landed a catch but really just looks like a security blanket....

That is THE TRUTH!

 

[LiftedUp]

I've seen more of the opposite where women will choose an unattractive man (and I've heard it said) he won't ever cheat on them and time and time again it's shown they will cheat just as soon as anyone. So my theory is a man is going to be a man regardless of how he looks....so let me get one that is easy on the eyes because I don't want to wake up having to put my hands over my eyes every morning just to say good morning.

This is my mother theory. She's like, at least you'll have good looking children out of it

Both my parents were insanely good-looking and sought after back in the day. And I'm not just saying that because they're my parents lol! My father was the one who was more hyped on getting married. His family paid for the entire thing including my mother's dress, which goes so much against tradition, but my father wanted to get married ASAP before someone else snatched her up! My paternal grandfather also adored my mother. You would think that they had an average or below average looking son the way they behaved

 

[LiftedUp]

No never...

Only one ever wanted for our friendship to go further than just a friendship. The others were attracted to me but it never went further.

I see insanely good-looking couples and lopsided ones too often for me to theorize anything.

 

[UniquelyDivine]

Nah, My ex fiance had better style than me but that was about it, the last guy I dated wasn't ugly by any means but he definitely wasn't more attractive than me. I think I have a fairly limited pool of really really attractive men where I am though, maybe if I were in a bigger city.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

No....most of the guys that date me or are interested in me tend to be toads.... I'm just being honest lol. Maybe that's why I never could stay with them for too long!


But anyway, in answer to your question, while I tend to like nice or decent-looking men, I don't think I could handle dating a guy who was SIGNIFICANTLY much better looking than me. I don't think women would like it that much after a while. WOMEN are usually supposed to be the "pretty one" by society standards. I think it would eventually grate on the nerves of most women if they go out w/their dude and HE'S the one getting all of the compliments of looking nice and whatnot lol.


There was a guy who has a blog that stated that men dating a "high-powered" competitive woman is equivalent to a woman dating a man who is significantly better-looking than her. It's not that you're intimidated by the other person, but more so that it's almost as if the other person has taken "your job" away, and so you don't know what you're good for. He was basically explaining why men don't typically go for the overly competent, high-powered corporate woman who is focused on her career. Of course there are always exceptions to every rule however.

 

[C@ssandr@]

My friend dated a guy who was "more attractive" than her. Girls would try to holla at him while they were out in the street together. What's notable about her case is that she is not woman pretty.

She did tell me that having women try to snatch him up all the time was annoying. He would shut it down, but it was still a nuisance.

 

[CaraWalker]

is there a reason why you guys arent doing this? the way women talk about shutting ugly men down around here I would think this would be the norm.

 

[ElizaBlue]

This is my mother theory. She's like, at least you'll have good looking children out of it

Both my parents were insanely good-looking and sought after back in the day. And I'm not just saying that because they're my parents lol! My father was the one who was more hyped on getting married. His family paid for the entire thing including my mother's dress, which goes so much against tradition, but my father wanted to get married ASAP before someone else snatched her up! My paternal grandfather also adored my mother. You would think that they had an average or below average looking son the way they behaved

I've heard similar sayings but more along the lines of "lightening up your line"...sadly where a darker person is encouraged to marry a lighter complexioned person. Strangely enough this has recently resurfaced with young black women marrying outside their race so their child will have a different grade of hair.

 

[ElizaBlue]

My friend dated a guy who was "more attractive" than her. Girls would try to holla at him while they were out in the street together. What's notable about her case is that she is not woman pretty.

She did tell me that having women try to snatch him up all the time was annoying. He would shut it down, but it was still a nuisance.

Lol...I once had a guy tell me he dates pretty women but would never consider marrying one. This was after I saw a picture of his ex-wife and was just baffled. He was like pretty women are a headache but fun to play with. This guy was dead gorgeous...I took it to mean he didn't trust himself so he didn't trust attractive women.

Funny thing was his ex-wife played him like a Baby Grand...she got money, cars, trips...and still left him for another man.

 

[C@ssandr@]

Lol...I once had a guy tell me he dates pretty women but would never consider marrying one. This was after I saw a picture of his ex-wife and was just baffled. He was like pretty women are a headache but fun to play with. This guy was dead gorgeous...I took it to mean he didn't trust himself so he didn't trust attractive women.

Funny thing was his ex-wife played him like a Baby Grand...she got money, cars, trips...and still left him for another man.

Smh.

 

[Fine 4s]

The guy I'm dating now is really good looking but no one questions how I pulled him or how he pulled me. He always brings up how attractive he thinks I am but I think he's comparing me to his exes, cuz I am not that attractive. If he wasn't a shy guy I'd be worried. Then again, I approached him so....

I've dated an ugly guy or two in the past *gulp*

 

[JustifiablyMe]

I immediately thought about this thread when I read the one in ET about Steve Harvey's daughter. Her husband is objectively better looking than her which automatically makes people assume he must be with her for a come-up.

I'm sure this is fairly common in reverse but I feel like that's an accepted unspoken condition. But with women, not so much, since women are generally regarded as the fairer sex.

 

[JustifiablyMe]

I've seen more of the opposite where women will choose an unattractive man (and I've heard it said) he won't ever cheat on them and time and time again it's shown they will cheat just as soon as anyone. So my theory is a man is going to be a man regardless of how he looks....so let me get one that is easy on the eyes because I don't want to wake up having to put my hands over my eyes every morning just to say good morning.
But think about it what's worse knowing you got cheated on my Quasimodo or Denzel?

THIS. I've seen fat/ugly/short dudes act up over time. At first you'll think it's all good and he'll treat you better but nah, they can and will switch up over time. You've probably blown his head up and now he thinks he can pull another you. I've said many times before I'd rather take an L for an attractive dude than a dude I'd prob never give the time of day. Getting played by an ugly dude is a lot worse.

I never really dated someone better looking for some reason. I like to be catered to like a queen and those types are not the ones that would do that. Besides, often times they have a lot of female friends around waiting in the backburner, they re used to attention and can't let go of it .

Average looking, financially secure, kind and giving is my type.

I used to date very attractive dudes and had to deal with all of the above. These days I go for the same - average looks/body. I already have a good-looking child.

 

[ScorpioBeauty09]

I'm not interested in seriously attractive men as a rule. So if I ever got with one he would have to pursue me and be persistent about it. But I'm pretty attractive so that means the men I've dated have been average to above average but I'm the better looking one.

 

[PeaceFlow]

Just one more thing. Single women usually make more effort while dating and in the first stages of a relationship. Good presentation can bump women up a couple of points and allow access to men that have those points naturally lol.

I think sometimes when you see a woman thats a 5, or 6 with a man thats a 8 it's because she stopped accentuating her features (got comfortable) and/or gained weight.

 

[JustifiablyMe]

^^This is so true. I initially wrote something like this. You can both be average on the scale but bc women have the ability to spruce/doll themselves up you can fool him into thinking you are the prize and will bump you up a point or two.

But I don't think this is a good plan when dating someone objectively more attractive than you. I've been there before and it's hard to keep up a facade. He's over there in all his 8-9 glory like #iwokeuplikethis and I have to get up an hour early to put my face on.

 

[lux10023]

i would be viciously angry if some ole ug mugg dude was tryna get brand new with me..lawwwdddd..that would be the worst turn of events eveahhhh lmaoooooo

THIS. I've seen fat/ugly/short dudes act up over time. At first you'll think it's all good and he'll treat you better but nah, they can and will switch up over time. You've probably blown his head up and now he thinks he can pull another you. I've said many times before I'd rather take an L for an attractive dude than a dude I'd prob never give the time of day. Getting played by an ugly dude is a lot worse.


I used to date very attractive dudes and had to deal with all of the above. These days I go for the same - average looks/body. I already have a good-looking child.

 

[ElizaBlue]

I immediately thought about this thread when I read the one in ET about Steve Harvey's daughter. Her husband is objectively better looking than her which automatically makes people assume he must be with her for a come-up.

I'm sure this is fairly common in reverse but I feel like that's an accepted unspoken condition. But with women, not so much, since women are generally regarded as the fairer sex.

True...just like Apollo and Phae Phae or Fanny, Oprah, etc...but we do the same for an old man with a young beautiful woman. So again I say get what you want...men will be men.

 

[tru4reele]

Looks is not the biggest factor for me. I'm way past that stage and too grown for that mess. As long as you can spoil me, cater to me, treat me like a queen, and be attractive enough to turn me on then we are good.

I don't usually go for the man that everybody goes bonkers over anyway. I like that low-key, mysterious one that has something sexy about him. Then when you finally get it in, he come out the bag on your arse.

 

[HappyMadison]

I am an alien. Your numbers do not compute lol. I like being the collector's edition lol

I think we, as women, do not give ourselves enough credit, because we face "US" everyday so we know our own imperfections. And we find mates that compliment our perceived imperfections.

I have a button nose and a weak bridge so I like men with phallic like noses, lol. So I consider my mates more attractive than me because I was compensating for what I felt I lack. But men are insecure creatures too. And the men I am with adore my button nose because we are not sword fighting when we kiss.

And I like men who are like, "there goes my babyyyy. Who hit on you today?" I like men that compliment me and people say "we" are an attractive couple because he is a reflection of the choices I make in mates. Where they are trying to take us both home lol. When my guy wears a suit, I want to say under my breath, "Yass, hunty" lol and if they are trying to pick us apart, it because of personal preference. But I got bawdy and I am fierce so, bloop. I am far from conceited, I am Just secure within myself and want a mate Who brings that out of me. But if you would have asked my 20 year old self, I would have been an insecure mess.

Beauty is subjective (platitudes). Find what compliments you.

 

[CaraWalker]

it is clear to me that what i am personally attracted to is not really or not always part of what is considered conventionally attractive. so when i say better looking than me, i mean men that are conventionally desirable and viewed as attractive objectively, even if i personally dont care all that much. i have dated those types of guys purely for that purpose. conventionally attractive men are often boring to me because they are so conventionally desirable.

i do it for brownie points, i guess. it doesnt really have any benefits to me in the interpersonal sense. its purely to help project winning images of bw in public. thats probably the main reason why i do it. and just to prove i can, and to stunt on others.

more reasons why im single

 

[FemmeFatale]

I tend to like guys that look similar to me so idk, lol.

 

[Oasis]

never. but tbh i've never had someone more attractive than me show any interest and i hardly ever encounter really good looking men. i see gorgeous women all the time but it's rare to see men on the same level.

 

[theRaven]

Mmmm I personally feel the guys I have dated were more attractive than me. Not pretty boy attractive but rather facially symmetric with lean and lanky builds. I think others especially my friends would say we are on the same level or I am more attractive because I'm always cute no matter what . But then again what I consider attractive is not conventional in the least.

I have done the opposite and dated a guy I didn't find attractive and just like someone said upthread they slowly lower your pedestal and start acting up I learned my lesson this time.

 

[ThirdEyeBeauty]

I have dated some fine looking men. I don't recall people comparing my looks to the man though. I have had people say we are a beautiful couple. As for myself, I don't think about myself when I look at my fine date. My brain just doesn't do any comparison.

 

[JudithO]

My dh is better looking. I'm not far behind but I'm pretty average.

I've never really thought about it much. No one has ever pointed it out or implied it.

But i also know that he truly was an equal opportunity dater. The women he dated ranged from hot to straight ugly, from toned brick houses to completely fat. Maybe that's why i never felt insecure, because I've always known he wasn't "settling" or concerned about my looks or lack thereof.

THIS! My dh is obviously better looking - I've never paid too much attention to it too as he was an equal opportunity dater + we were best friends prior so I dont notice what he looks like.

BUT my big mouthed Nigerian family keeps reminding me... " Hmmm... I wonder what he saw in you.... na wa o" .... "You better give birth to children that look like him o" etc. It's one particular aunt that keeps saying crap, but she is my mum's older sister, so I just have to swallow it.. smh...

 

[julzinha]

THIS! My dh is obviously better looking - I've never paid too much attention to it too as he was an equal opportunity dater + we were best friends prior so I dont notice what he looks like.

BUT my big mouthed Nigerian family keeps reminding me... " Hmmm... I wonder what he saw in you.... na wa o" .... "You better give birth to children that look like him o" etc. It's one particular aunt that keeps saying crap, but she is my mum's older sister, so I just have to swallow it.. smh...

Africans can be so blunt sometimes!

 

[futurelonglocks]

My husband is very attractive and one of the things that Initially attracted me to him was that he didn't know it/act like it at all. No fragile ego or arrogance. No he doesn't have low self esteem- his looks just really didn't matter to him- he just wants to be the nice guy, very humble, work hard and has a heart of serving. He's def a sweetheart and works to please me. All of my friends and famiky thinks he's just hot! Lol. (Many say he looks like Boris Kodjoe and calls him Morris, Boris little brother lol). I am not unattractive at all and we are always told that we are an attractive or beautiful couple. So I feel as though I hit the jackpot with him in that department as we are compatible . I do know that one of the things that attracted him to me was my confidence and the fact that I have such a strong presence when I enter the room.