Am I the only one getting on my friends nerve???

[tazzydennis]

Ladies, since I've been on my hair care journey and I've been seeing more and more progress; I've been wanting to share this info with my mother and friends. Judging by the looks that I've been receiving...I'm getting on their nerves!!!!

I can't help it that I want to spread the joy! My mothers' hair is dry and breaking off like crazy. I offered to do treatments on her hair every week. She said no. Cause according to her jackleg beautician, she only needs deep conditioning once a month.

There's a lady at my job that did have a weave and the front ends of her hair were BREAKING BADLY!!! I offered to whip up a batch of my hair crack for her, do a couple of treatments on her hair to get her on the right track. Once again, I was informed that her beautician told her not to listen to me. Cause and I quote, "the ladies on that website are actually beauticians pretending to be regular women so that they can turn women against away from going to the salon?????????!!!!!!" Like I told her, the jacked up way they were doing my hair is what turned me away from going to the salon.

My family and friends are still believing the hype. According to them I wash my hair too much (which involves me washing out the perm), I no longer grease my scalp (which was in all actuality KILLING MY SCALP) and I make my home concoctions (which in some cases involves MN).

OH NO!!!!!!!!!! They're trying to fit me for a strait jacket now!

This blows my mind!!! They're constantly telling me how much healthier and longer my hair looks; but, when I fill them in on what it takes to make it look this way...they roll their eyes and look at me like I'm crazy!!!!

Are any of you other ladies going through this???

 

[Kiki82]

Ladies, since I've been on my hair care journey and I've been seeing more and more progress; I've been wanting to share this info with my mother and friends. Judging by the looks that I've been receiving...I'm getting on their nerves!!!!

I can't help it that I want to spread the joy! My mothers' hair is dry and breaking off like crazy. I offered to do treatments on her hair every week. She said no. Cause according to her jackleg beautician, she only needs deep conditioning once a month.

There's a lady at my job that did have a weave and the front ends of her hair were BREAKING BADLY!!! I offered to whip up a batch of my hair crack for her, do a couple of treatments on her hair to get her on the right track. Once again, I was informed that her beautician told her not to listen to me. Cause and I quote, "the ladies on that website are actually beauticians pretending to be regular women so that they can turn women against away from going to the salon?????????!!!!!!" Like I told her, the jacked up way they were doing my hair is what turned me away from going to the salon.

My family and friends are still believing the hype. According to them I wash my hair too much (which involves me washing out the perm), I no longer grease my scalp (which was in all actuality KILLING MY SCALP) and I make my home concoctions (which in some cases involves MN).

OH NO!!!!!!!!!! They're trying to fit me for a strait jacket now!

This blows my mind!!! They're constantly telling me how much healthier and longer my hair looks; but, when I fill them in on what it takes to make it look this way...they roll their eyes and look at me like I'm crazy!!!!

Are any of you other ladies going through this???

I am cracking up at my job girl!!...but I so agree with this statement bolded above......some people just don't want to put the time in or make necessary changes when it comes to caring for their hair....hopefully you can be the example, but you can't force them...

Kiki82

 

[Neala21]

OH NO!!!!!!!!!! They're trying to fit me for a strait jacket now!

This blows my mind!!! They're constantly telling me how much healthier and longer my hair looks; but, when I fill them in on what it takes to make it look this way...they roll their eyes and look at me like I'm crazy!!!!

Are any of you other ladies going through this???

When my twin sister and I decided we would take the journey to take better care of our hair which involved us both going natural to learn about our REAL texture and then using that knowledge when returned back to relaxing and our hair was growing past SL we tried giving our family advice on how to better take care of their hair. We also went to cosmo school for a few months! Our family ignored or brushed off our advice and made comments that we were washing our hair TOO much and going TOO long without a relaxer.

Now that they see my hair now APL and my sisters hair past SL (my twin has bc her hair so many times due to going back n forth with wanting to be & stay natural) they are now asking us for the advice we prev tried to give them since they see our progress. The person who has taken in the most of our advice is our little sister who is in HS who wants longer and healthier hair.

Some people let things go in one ear and out the other and then once they see your progress they wanna pay attention but by then its like I don't wanna give you any advice now b/c you didn't wanna listen to me b4.

Pride is sometimes the biggest hurdle ppl need to overcome!

 

[Whimsy]

i've stopped offering advice to people. they used to listen blindly when my hair was real long i guess thinking I must know what I'm talking about, when I BCed a few years ago, people stopped listening to my advice lol, as it grew back to bsl people would ask for tips and that's the only time i'll give advice. now i see certain things w/ other people's hair and I KNOW what would help em, but I just keep my mouth shut.

 

[*Frisky*]

You will get tired trust me...I REFUSE to talk to anybody outside of the board about hair anymore...even my own mother...hahahaha

 

[Platinum]

You're not the only one!I'm on the road a lot so when one of my friends calls and tells me about their hair woes, I offer some suggestions. Some of them don't listen. Last week, I told a friend that I haven't had a relaxer in 4 months and she said "No ma'am, I get a relaxer every 4 weeks". Okay...Mind you her sister is a beautician so naturally, she listens to everything she says. Another friend has had severe breakage (very similiar to one of the LHCF member's daughter. I'm sure some of you remember that heartbreaking thread) so I told her about garlic shampoo (she already had it). Then I told her about LHCF. I hope she signs up. I have learned so much since I joined.

Anyway, I believe in the "show and prove method". I'm not going to go out of my way to offer advice to those that will . I'm going to show them just doing what I do and prove to them what I'm doing works. I'll just let them continue to let those "jackleg stylists" take their money and ruin their hair.

 

[Missi]

I feel the same EXACT way!!!!!!!!! I swear people compliment me on my hair and ask me how I get it that long......i try to imply rollersetting (not good for black ppl hair), co-washes (GIRL!!! Don't you know ur black?) and baggying (Its stupid)....

....so I don't waste my time no more: i feel way to embarrassed to even tell ppl anymore cuz apparently I'm weird for looking at hair boards & taking pics (can't leave nothing "HAIR" viewable on my pc).

SOme people only want the shortcut (products) and not the work that goes behind it (rollersetting, etc). Cuz i've seen ppl with weave past SL and MY GOD : their ends were SO JACKED.......WHEEEW: done venting. Lol

 

[Dubois007]

Next time just accept the compliment and refer them to the forum if they ask you for advice, that would be their choice to check it out. No more crazy look

 

[SimpleKomplexity]

I don't even care anymore lol. Yeah I'm getting on my friends nerves. I only have one friend who believes me. All of the others think I'm nuts. Even one of my BFF pulled me to the side and said, Krazynkute you really need to stop doing what YOU think is best, and leave it up to the professionals. The lady at the beauty salaon said you really need to trim all of your ends, and cut your hair in layers. You really should, your hair is getting logner but it's not healthy with how much conditioner and stuff you put in your hair. All that water and conditioner is just not necessary......

I jsut keep my mouth closed and keep doing what I gotta do lol

 

[KEWLKAT103]

I never offer up advice on anything, including hair.
If I'm asked then I will tell what I know and they can take it or leave it at that point.

 

[Christa438]

You will get tired trust me...I REFUSE to talk to anybody outside of the board about hair anymore...even my own mother...hahahaha

lol...Many friends and family members will not hear a peep out of me about Hair because I dont like debating all day or defending my reggie.

On the plus side, I have two close friends (they have long hair so they can relate), one cousin, my SO and my mama that I can really talk to about haircare.

 

[Coffee]

Been there and done that with some people, but then my sister and sister in law think I know it all about hair. They are both listening and doing what I have suggested. My SIL has even stopped going to the salon and I'm now giving her relaxers.

 

[Moisture2608]

I just don't offer advice because I don't want to have to defend my regiment. If someone asks, then I talk; other than that, my lips are sealed.

 

[Ariana4000]

Honestly I've been on both sides of the fence. My hair was breaking off so bad at one time, and I asked my girlfriend whose hair was apl about what to do. She said keep it moisturized and rollerset. I didn't want to listen. I felt she just had a good grade of hair, and that wouldn't work for me because my stylist didn't do that. When they are tired of their hair being hard and dry, then they will listen.

 

[beautifulisaunderstatment]

I dont offer advice. Only tell them when they ask. And even then tell them small bits. When someone asks me how did I grow my hair long, I say I stopped relaxing it. If they shrug and say ohhhh then I leave it at that. If they want to know more Ill start feeding them tidbits. Or say they cant stop relaxing I talk about maybe stretching thier relaxer. If they get to the point where they really strat asking all the time or teeling e what they bught/tried THEN I tellt hem about the website and go even deeper. Aint nothign like giving unsolicited advice to get you pt on ignore. If they really wanna know they will ask. I find that 75% of people pass it off as genetics or luck. The other 25% really want to know and will actually give your advice a try.

 

[NYAmicas]

Ok, OP, I'm LMAO @ the thought of everyone on here secretly being beauticians and secret agents trying to hurt others' hair goals.
I assure you, I'm just a regular chick from Brooklyn who had absolutely NO idea what to do when it came to my hair. I'm not an expert now but whatever I'm doing is working for me. Friends? In this instance, dare I say it, they were hating on me. Snide comments everytime I co-washed or tried to give them some info on healthy hair. The results? My hair is still longer than theirs and they're still using hair pieces. Please keep doing what you're doing, they and their stylists dont know what they're talking about.

 

[eunique]

You are not alone. Nobody wants to listen to me, yet my hair is growing and growing.

 

[trendybosschicebz]

Oh boy can I relate to this. My mom is the main culprit teasing me about my hair "obsession". She said if I mention one more thing about hair or hair products she's going to scream. She even laughs when I add honey to my conditioner. She laughs when I take my heat protectant with me to the shop. But everytime I get my hair done she says: "Oh I wish my hair was beautiful and healthy like yours".
Well a few months back she started adding tracks to the front to make her hair look fuller and now she has bald spots in those areas. I told her stop using Dr. Miracles, did she listen? Nope. Still using oil sheen with Mineral oil. Has she stopped using that? Nope. Spritz? Nope. So Im done offering my advice. I figure if she really wants help she ask.
My friends are the same way. They want long hair but they dont want to do the research and work.
So, well see who'll be laughing when its all said and done.

 

[Angelicus]

Awesome thread. I do not give any advice anymore unless someone pretty much begs for it. I used to give advice to people that would ask how my hair got long but I think they were just doing it for the sake of conversation. When I told them that all I do is wash it with conditioner everyday and barely wear it down, they look at me like I'm stupid.

I have very good friends that do hair and they think I don't know what the heck I am talking about. But, the proof is in the hair.

 

[Jenai]

When I first started reading hair boards, I wanted to share everything I knew ... whether they liked it or not. Now, I just refer folks to this forum because haircare is a personal journey that each person has to travel at his/her own pace.

 

[iasade]

Its funny to me because my sister has SL hair but it is chemically treated and broken with bald spots all over, that she keeps it in a phony pony constantly. I have tried to tell her about hair care, but she kept calling me nappy head, afro puff and dread head, because I wear my hair in small braids constantly. So last week, my dad turned 78 and for his birthday, my hair was straighted because he hasn't seen it since I got a BC in 2003. When my sister showed up at the restaurant she just kept staring at my hair the WHOLE time. She kept making comments like "you think you are cute because you hair is hanging almost to your shoulders. I was like girl, this isn't long hair, you haven't seen nothing yet! You just wait until this time next year, my nappy hair will be longer, healthier and thicker than it is now! She also kept saying that her hair is long too, but it is just broken and thinning, at which time I told her she should go natural and start taking better care of her hair. She then told me to shut up with my nappy head self

On a work note, a sistah that kept telling me i was a fool for going natural in a corporate setting, saw my hair last week and was like OH MY, your hair is longer than mine now, at which time I said, yeah its that nappy foolishness girl. She then rolled her eyes and walked away

 

[mrsthiggy]

To all of us who have found the light..... There's a story in the Bible of the 5 wise and foolish virgins... If you have offered you help , aid and "secret" hair crack and they don't want it ;the absolute best thing to do is stop talking. You are allowed to smile, wave and as the spirit moves display your glory ( new hair) length and depth. Don't spend any more time. Just you wait and see

 

[Lucky's Mom]

Ladies, since I've been on my hair care journey and I've been seeing more and more progress; I've been wanting to share this info with my mother and friends. Judging by the looks that I've been receiving...I'm getting on their nerves!!!!

I can't help it that I want to spread the joy! My mothers' hair is dry and breaking off like crazy. I offered to do treatments on her hair every week. She said no. Cause according to her jackleg beautician, she only needs deep conditioning once a month.

There's a lady at my job that did have a weave and the front ends of her hair were BREAKING BADLY!!! I offered to whip up a batch of my hair crack for her, do a couple of treatments on her hair to get her on the right track. Once again, I was informed that her beautician told her not to listen to me. Cause and I quote, "the ladies on that website are actually beauticians pretending to be regular women so that they can turn women against away from going to the salon?????????!!!!!!" Like I told her, the jacked up way they were doing my hair is what turned me away from going to the salon.

My family and friends are still believing the hype. According to them I wash my hair too much (which involves me washing out the perm), I no longer grease my scalp (which was in all actuality KILLING MY SCALP) and I make my home concoctions (which in some cases involves MN).

OH NO!!!!!!!!!! They're trying to fit me for a strait jacket now!

This blows my mind!!! They're constantly telling me how much healthier and longer my hair looks; but, when I fill them in on what it takes to make it look this way...they roll their eyes and look at me like I'm crazy!!!!

Are any of you other ladies going through this???

Look - this is the deal for me - I have done all that I can to help people - giving them concoctions, oils - homemade spritzes.... etc.
People don't appreciate it. My mom does. She is the only one....and one other person. I have stopped giving any of my pricey stuff or information away.
so - stop giving advice. It is a waste of time.................

 

[Angkin73]

I don't give advice about hair care to any one anymore eithr, I think I was on the fast track to getting on my family and friends nerves also. It all started when I found this forum and hair tips on youtube. I talk about the things I have read and tried all the time. They listen, but would never try it themselves I feel like a little child thats just been patted on the head cause I said somthing cute.

I used to give a friend of mine advice about not putting so much heat on her hair, and how to wear it curly at times, to give it a rest. I couldn't believe she wouldn't take my advice, but when her stylist told her the same thing, she was all for it. Unbelieveable!

Also, my sister was having trouble with her hair being to dry, so I asked her if she wanted me to make her up some of my shea butter mix. She responded by saying that she always thought it was bad to put butter in your hair!

 

[MonPetite]

I was the exact same way upon finding LHCF and was up until a year ago until I realized they weren't going to listen.

Sadly, they still don't want to because now I'm natural. Maybe in 3 years when I'm a waist length natural head they'll come around.

I doubt it.

 

[HappyHairDreams]

Ladies, since I've been on my hair care journey and I've been seeing more and more progress; I've been wanting to share this info with my mother and friends. Judging by the looks that I've been receiving...I'm getting on their nerves!!!!

I can't help it that I want to spread the joy! My mothers' hair is dry and breaking off like crazy. I offered to do treatments on her hair every week. She said no. Cause according to her jackleg beautician, she only needs deep conditioning once a month.

There's a lady at my job that did have a weave and the front ends of her hair were BREAKING BADLY!!! I offered to whip up a batch of my hair crack for her, do a couple of treatments on her hair to get her on the right track. Once again, I was informed that her beautician told her not to listen to me. Cause and I quote, "the ladies on that website are actually beauticians pretending to be regular women so that they can turn women against away from going to the salon?????????!!!!!!" Like I told her, the jacked up way they were doing my hair is what turned me away from going to the salon.

My family and friends are still believing the hype. According to them I wash my hair too much (which involves me washing out the perm), I no longer grease my scalp (which was in all actuality KILLING MY SCALP) and I make my home concoctions (which in some cases involves MN).

OH NO!!!!!!!!!! They're trying to fit me for a strait jacket now!

This blows my mind!!! They're constantly telling me how much healthier and longer my hair looks; but, when I fill them in on what it takes to make it look this way...they roll their eyes and look at me like I'm crazy!!!!

Are any of you other ladies going through this???

LOL. I'm sorry. I feel your frustration but this is why i don't tell anyone, ANYTHING. People don't receive information until they are ready, you can't push it, or even offer it to them; they have to seek it themselves.

 

[belleama]

Nope you aren't the only one. We all want to help our friends and families but just like anything else if they don't ask for it you are wasting your breath. If I hear someone talking about something I have a little knowledge about I may give them a little bit of information. How they respond tells me whether or not I should continue or just nod my head and smile. I know a little bit about a lot of things so I do try to pass on my knowledge. Only to those who want to know. Everybody else just needs to learn for themselves.

 

[Covergirl5906]

LOL. I'm sorry. I feel your frustration but this is why i don't tell anyone, ANYTHING. People don't receive information until they are ready, you can't push it, or even offer it to them; they have to seek it themselves.

DITTO...I am not one to offer unsolicited advice about certain things...

 

[ChocolateKindOfCool]

you are definitely not the only one i offered sooo many people help but instead they accused me of being crazy and if i continue with what im doing all my hair will fall out ( from washing 1-2 weekly and using "chemcials" such as castor oil etc.)

 

[caribgirl]

I don't even care anymore lol. Yeah I'm getting on my friends nerves. I only have one friend who believes me. All of the others think I'm nuts. Even one of my BFF pulled me to the side and said, Krazynkute you really need to stop doing what YOU think is best, and leave it up to the professionals. The lady at the beauty salaon said you really need to trim all of your ends, and cut your hair in layers. You really should, your hair is getting logner but it's not healthy with how much conditioner and stuff you put in your hair. All that water and conditioner is just not necessary......

I jsut keep my mouth closed and keep doing what I gotta do lol

-Love the ignorance!

All know that I have a hair fetish and I don't care one bit!

I don't volunteer as much as before. If I'm asked, I just stop yaking about good hair habits when I see that my listener has that "far away from my conversation look" in her eyes .