After the 1st date, do you call?

[Belle Du Jour]

Do you call after the first date or wait for him to call? If you call, what is the appropriate length of time to wait? Or does it not matter? If he says "give me a call sometime" does tht mean he's expecting you to make the call?

 

[BrooklynSouth]

Do you call after the first date or wait for him to call? If you call, what is the appropriate length of time to wait? Or does it not matter? If he says "give me a call sometime" does tht mean he's expecting you to make the call?

No, Classimami..do not call him. The man will call if he is really into you. You are not desperate..you have a life and other things to do. I had a great date {or so I thought} last Sunday...he has not called yet, neither will I.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

No, Classimami..do not call him. The man will call if he is really into you. You are not desperate..you have a life and other things to do. I had a great date {or so I thought} last Sunday...he has not called yet, neither will I.

Thank you. I asked because I was concerned about being rude. I guess I felt it would be rude to not e-mail at least and say thank you since he took me out to dinner but I will wait it out. It's a shame that you can't just be courteous without fear of not playing by the rules and wondering if it will put you in a vulnerable position.

 

[Valerie]

No, Classimami..do not call him. The man will call if he is really into you. You are not desperate..you have a life and other things to do. I had a great date {or so I thought} last Sunday...he has not called yet, neither will I.

You are so right, let him do the running. If he is not interested, someone else will be better.

 

[GeorginaSparks]

Yep dont call him. Tell him how much you enjoyed the date AFTER he contacts you.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

Thanks. I'm a little rusty

 

[Bunny77]

Thank you. I asked because I was concerned about being rude. I guess I felt it would be rude to not e-mail at least and say thank you since he took me out to dinner but I will wait it out. It's a shame that you can't just be courteous without fear of not playing by the rules and wondering if it will put you in a vulnerable position.

I think it's okay to e-mail to thank a man for a date. I read this tip in a book by a New York matchmaker that said that it's the polite thing to do the next day, BUT she said that's it, and DON'T call.

I also hate the "Call me sometime," thing... how do you think the date went?

 

[Belle Du Jour]

I think it's okay to e-mail to thank a man for a date. I read this tip in a book by a New York matchmaker that said that it's the polite thing to do the next day, BUT she said that's it, and DON'T call.

I also hate the "Call me sometime," thing... how do you think the date went?

Sending you a pm

 

[motherx2esq]

I think it's okay to e-mail to thank a man for a date. I read this tip in a book by a New York matchmaker that said that it's the polite thing to do the next day, BUT she said that's it, and DON'T call.

I also hate the "Call me sometime," thing... how do you think the date went?

I agree Bunny (hey girl!). I do not like "call me sometimes" crap.

 

[Spongie Bloom]

if you said thank you for him taking you out at the end of the date there is no need to email him and thank him yet again once or twice on the date is enough but no more

 

[Ms Red]

After the first date I let him contact me. If he's worth his salt, he won't ask me to 'give him a call sometime.' erplexed No buddy. I expect a delivery of my favorite flowers or a nice thank you from him within the week. Call me siddity.

 

[MizAvalon]

Do you call after the first date or wait for him to call? If you call, what is the appropriate length of time to wait? Or does it not matter? If he says "give me a call sometime" does tht mean he's expecting you to make the call?

I don't like the "give me a call sometime". It's too vague, like he couldn't care less about seeing me again and just saying that to be polite.

If he wants to see me again then I expect him to bring that up during our first date or the immediate few days after.

 

[BroadstreetBully]

Don't do it! Let a man be a man. Thank him after the date. I made the mistake of texting a guy after our first date, simply thanking him and wishing him a good day. Well he brought that up when he broke my heart. Never again!

 

[Divine Inspiration]

I don't like the "give me a call sometime". It's too vague, like he couldn't care less about seeing me again and just saying that to be polite.

If he wants to see me again then I expect him to bring that up during our first date or the immediate few days after.

Right. I've only gotten that line once, and I did NOT call him. In my experience, when a man enjoys himself on a date or really wants to see you again, he'll try to set the next date while still on the first or he'll definitely call 3-5 days later to say that he enjoyed himself and propose another meeting.

Our jobs as women are not to court them...they are to pursue and court us...our jobs in the dating phase are simply to be beautiful, charming, and engaging and give him just cause for calling and courting us.

Men are more simple than that. If he wants to talk/connect/go out, he'll call...if he doesn't, he won't.

 

[cocoberry10]

It's real simple..........wait for him to call

 

[Belle Du Jour]

Right. I've only gotten that line once, and I did NOT call him. In my experience, when a man enjoys himself on a date or really wants to see you again, he'll try to set the next date while still on the first or he'll definitely call 3-5 days later to say that he enjoyed himself and propose another meeting.

Our jobs as women are not to court them...they are to pursue and court us...our jobs in the dating phase are simply to be beautiful, charming, and engaging and give him just cause for calling and courting us.

Men are more simple than that. If he wants to talk/connect/go out, he'll call...if he doesn't, he won't.

3-5 days, huh? Maybe I'm bourgeois for thinking he shoulda called the next day. But I know guys have to have their "game" too.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

I don't like the "give me a call sometime". It's too vague, like he couldn't care less about seeing me again and just saying that to be polite.

If he wants to see me again then I expect him to bring that up during our first date or the immediate few days after.

I agree.

 

[BroadstreetBully]

3-5 days, huh? Maybe I'm bourgeois for thinking he shoulda called the next day. But I know guys have to have their "game" too.

They sure do have game. They are thinking that calling sooner is too early and you'll think they are desperate. Sometimes I think dating has too many rules. But you gotta play the game if you're in it to win it.

 

[Sly]

I would not call. At the end of the evening or date if he is not trying to set up another date I would not concern myself about a call, text, or email. . . he's told me everything I need to know by his. . . non-action.

 

[BAP28]

no---if a man has not contacted me within 24 hours to make sure i got home safe---that i enjoyed myself and if we will be seeing each other sometime soon within 24 hours--than i mentally have moved on--

the competition is steep with me--your either in or out the game---but im not gonna bench anyone who i deem is not worthy...

3 -5 days later--hell nah--24 hours or nothing at all--lol!

time is of the essence

 

[Divine Inspiration]

3-5 days, huh? Maybe I'm bourgeois for thinking he shoulda called the next day. But I know guys have to have their "game" too.

The more secure ones will call the next day or heck, maybe even that night, but many of them don't want to come on too strong or "do too much" so they give it a few days. I don't necessarily think that's game...men put just as much thought into their moves when they're into a chick as we do when we're into a guy.

 

[itismehmmkay]

Nope, I let him call and I time him, too. I like those next-day-callers that don't play Some will call exactly 3 days later and I now they're just playing. Anything after 3 days, I purposely make myself forget him.

 

[Lindy]

No way... don't call, write or anything else... "Give me a call sometime?" He must be ... WTH?? Yeah, right! In his dreams!! In my experience, if they want a second date with you, they always say something about it during the first date. And if they're REALLY into you, they will call you later the same day/night to reiterate that they had a good time and want to see u again. If there is no contact from him within 3 days TOPS, he's playing games. You don't have time for that nonsense. NEXT!!