3c envy...I'm feeling a little guilty

[*Happily Me*]

i used to feel like that a long time ago but i don't anymore.

HEALTHY type 4 hair is just as nice. besides, there are plenty positives about having type 4 hair. it's thicker, it holds a rollerset long (i think anyway) and it's AMAZING when it's BSL or beyond!

here's my unpopular opinion. someone else on this board said the same thing. if your hair is in the 3s, it's easy to maintain and grow. it's EXPECTED to grow. shoot! now, to see some brastrap 4b hair... hmmph, that's really something to see. think sylver, isis, machieramour, lauren. SLAMMING!

i'd like to say that i do find type 3 hair beautiful. just look at cichelle, bubbln, ayeshia's albums. too die for! and i'm sure they have certain challenges with hair care.

but, i have to rep 4b/a hair.

 

[senimoni]

My nephew has 3a/b hair and he is heartbroken that its not 4a/b because he is unable to get braids etc...his hair slips....goes to show its all about your perspective.

 

[sylver2]

I was always envious that I couldn't just wash my hair and go, it didn't curl up and get pretty ringlets like the 3's. I still am envious I'm not gonna front I still remeber my mishap reading Hair Sophisticate. Michael Michelle was in there sharing her regimen. I tried it and...well it took hours to undo what I tried..lol.When I was younger and TLC came out, I was in the mirror for hours trying to get Chili's hair styles. I looked like a fool.

 

[hopeful]

I think viewing this beautiful ladies fotki a few days ago is what's got me feeling a little green....

http://members.fotki.com/Raehlilisynth/

Chayil

Oh wow, that lady's hair is gorgeous, lol you better stay away from her Fotki! The hair in my crown area is 3 something and the rest is 4a/4b and for me the three hair is just so much easier to deal with. When I detangle it's a breeze, not a snag, when I moisturize it stays moisturized for hours, it grows nicely and rarely breaks off, if ever. My 4a/4b hair is much drier and much more delicate, I have to be very careful with it or it will snap or break off easily. I can't imagine what my life would be like if all of my hair was like my crown...But, I've learned to accept and love ALL of my hair, but it is a learning process, it takes time. At least you are being honest with yourself.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

My advice is don't feel bad for envying another hair type, just don't let yourself be consumed by it. I've got hugemongous boobs but noazzatall and I envy the chicks who can fill out a pair of applebottom jeans. Everybody's got their issues.

I'm one of those people who believes that a 'real' type 3 has an easier time with styling issues/dealing with breakage/retaining length AND social acceptance than 4's do, but I'd drive myself crazy if I throught about that everytime I deal with my own hair. So I don't.

Truth be told, I appreciate the typing system. I wish that it could be taken a couple steps further to seperate differences in type 4 hair so that folks could get a better understanding of what they are dealing with. I wish that typing didn't have to be political. There is a legitimate difference between type 3 & 4 hair. It's not good or bad, it just is.

 

[secretdiamond]

My advice is don't feel bad for envying another hair type, just don't let yourself be consumed by it. I've got hugemongous boobs but noazzatall and I envy the chicks who can fill out a pair of applebottom jeans. Everybody's got their issues.

I'm one of those people who believes that a 'real' type 3 has an easier time with styling issues/dealing with breakage/retaining length AND social acceptance than 4's do, but I'd drive myself crazy if I throught about that everytime I deal with my own hair. So I don't.

Truth be told, I appreciate the typing system. I wish that it could be taken a couple steps further to seperate differences in type 4 hair so that folks could get a better understanding of what they are dealing with. I wish that typing didn't have to be political. There is a legitimate difference between type 3 & 4 hair. It's not good or bad, it just is.

Agree with this post entirely. The bolded is the same way I feel. But like you said, I don't hate having my hair type. I just do me, but the whole relaxing thing is something I've been pondering for a long time. Like the OP, I've wanted to start a thread with my thoughts, but I don't want to get lynched and blamed for starting something. LOL. But it still weighs on my mind heavily. Maybe one day, I'll take a pill of fukitol and just do it!

 

[mkstar826]

i have a patch of "3c" among "4a/b" (hate the hair typing but i'll use it for the sake of the discussion) and annoys me sometimes. it won't hold twists as well as the tighter coils in my hair and it sheds and breaks more no matter what i do. but anyway, i said all that to say the grass isn't always greener. all hair types have their challenges. i think envy is a natural thing but if you let it get out of control then that's when you have to check yourself.

 

[chayil0427]

I've got hugemongous boobs but noazzatall and I envy the chicks who can fill out a pair of applebottom jeans. Everybody's got their issues.

ME TOOOOOOOOO! My butt is just like big and flat...LOL...I often check my butt in the mirror and wonder what happened to my traditional black girl booty! Yet, I just wear long blouses that are low cut...accentuate the positive!

Chayil

 

[Denim And Leather]

Just to clairfy myself, I don't think hair typing is all THAT bad, because it can definitely be very helpful when determining what type of products are good for your hair, especially when you see someone with similar hair using certain products. It's just that overall, I think Andre's hair typing system can end up doing more harm than good among blacks, since we generally seem to be more sensitive about our hair.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Agree with this post entirely. The bolded is the same way I feel. But like you said, I don't hate having my hair type. I just do me, but the whole relaxing thing is something I've been pondering for a long time. Like the OP, I've wanted to start a thread with my thoughts, but I don't want to get lynched and blamed for starting something. LOL. But it still weighs on my mind heavily. Maybe one day, I'll take a pill of fukitol and just do it!

Ok, the pharmacy is open, J.C. is buying a round of fukitol for all the ladies with hair issues!

The reason why I love LHCF is because if somebody comes to the table earnestly about a hair issue, the drama is kept to a minimum. Now if somebody just says some ole janky ish about black hair, that's a whole nother conversation.

Although, for real though secretdiamond, if you want to wear your hair straight just flat iron it. While I don't think perms are evil, touch ups are a concept straight from the bowels of hell.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

ME TOOOOOOOOO! My butt is just like big and flat...LOL...I often check my butt in the mirror and wonder what happened to my traditional black girl booty! Yet, I just wear long blouses that are low cut...accentuate the positive!

Chayil

And that's all you can do.

People don't believe me when I'm in those Buffy the Body threads, I WOULD RULE THE UNIVERSE if I had that booty. It's just wasted on her.

 

[Curlee_lurker]

People don't believe me when I'm in those Buffy the Body threads, I WOULD RULE THE UNIVERSE if I had that booty.

People would bow down to me and call me Princess McBooty as someone carried me to have my breakfast of diamond encrusted cheerios.

I have nothing of actual importance to add to this thread. Just last week someone told me they wouldn't cornrow my hair because I have white girl hair and I nearly cried.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

It's just that overall, I think Andre's hair typing system can end up doing more harm than good among blacks, since we generally seem to be more sensitive about our hair.

I think that because we are so sensitive about our hair it keeps us from progressing. I understand that alot of people want to embrace natural hair as it is, but with that philosophy, nobody is ever going to find a cure for these damn knots that natural hair is prone to!

If other people like having to snip away their progress, that's fabulous, but I'm not digging it at all.

Folks get so caught up in trying not to strive for 'good hair' that I think they don't do enough to nourish their self labeled 'bad hair'.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

People would bow down to me and call me Princess McBooty as someone carried me to have my breakfast of diamond encrusted cheerios.

I have nothing of actual importance to add to this thread. Just last week someone told me they wouldn't cornrow my hair because I have white girl hair and I nearly cried.

*******************DEAD*************************

Who are you and WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? Post more often!

 

[Kimberly]

I understand. I get envious myself sometimes.

I am a work in progress and I am far from perfect.

 

[natstar]

I think that because we are so sensitive about our hair it keeps us from progressing. I understand that alot of people want to embrace natural hair as it is, but with that philosophy, nobody is ever going to find a cure for these damn knots that natural hair is prone to!

If other people like having to snip away their progress, that's fabulous, but I'm not digging it at all.

Folks get so caught up in trying not to strive for 'good hair' that I think they don't do enough to nourish their self labeled 'bad hair'.

Great point. I do find myself envious at times when I want to wear my hair a certain way and it just won't do what I want it to do. I think envy is normal to a point. Slowly I have learned (after much frustration and $$$) to appreciate and work with what I have. It makes things soo much easier and I feel better about myself.

 

[DDTexlaxed]

I have 3c and it is no picnic if u don't know how to style it. My hair has its own unique beauty just as everyone's hair does. I envy people who know how to style their hair and make it look gorgeous. That is my future goal to learn how to care for my hair.

 

[Southernbella.]

This is a cool thread. I used to envy curly girls, too. It wasn't even so much that their hair LOOKED better, but that it seemed like it would be easier to deal with. But like others have said, they're dealing with their hair too, so it's all a wash.

I was always envious that I couldn't just wash my hair and go, it didn't curl up and get pretty ringlets like the 3's. I still am envious I'm not gonna front I still remeber my mishap reading Hair Sophisticate. Michael Michelle was in there sharing her regimen. I tried it and...well it took hours to undo what I tried..lol.When I was younger and TLC came out, I was in the mirror for hours trying to get Chili's hair styles. I looked like a fool.

I tried to get my hair like that light-skinned chick in Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel" video. erplexed It was awful. Ironically, looking back, I think that was weave anyway.

 

[glamazon386]

ME TOOOOOOOOO! My butt is just like big and flat...LOL...I often check my butt in the mirror and wonder what happened to my traditional black girl booty! Yet, I just wear long blouses that are low cut...accentuate the positive!

Chayil

Cosigning! Whenever I go out I push the girls up and out and show off my legs. Shoot forget a booty. Gotta accentuate the positive. Don't worry about the envy. It happens to everyone. As long as it doesn't get out of hand you'll be fine.

 

[chayil0427]

This is a cool thread. I used to envy curly girls, too. It wasn't even so much that their hair LOOKED better, but that it seemed like it would be easier to deal with. But like others have said, they're dealing with their hair too, so it's all a wash.



I tried to get my hair like that light-skinned chick in Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel" video. erplexed It was awful. Ironically, looking back, I think that was weave anyway.

LAUREN YOU ENVY OTHER PEOPLES HAIR!!!! You are one of my hair idols on here child. Someone needs to drive by your house and beat your butt missy!!!

Chayil

 

[Lovelylocs]

I my hair.

To the OP, I think once you get your hair on track to the point where it is super healthy and if you grow it out to armpit length and longer, you will not be so "envious". You may also want to learn to do the Dominican blowout and how to create some natural looking waves/curls. No one will ever notice the difference. Just be careful, b/c sometimes when people do that they forget that they have fragile 4a/4b relaxed hair and start doing foolish things like using permanent hair color. Good luck!

 

[Galleta]

I love my 4b hair, my smooth dark skin, and my tight curvy body.

 

[caligirl]

I my hair.

To the OP, I think once you get your hair on track to the point where it is super healthy and if you grow it out to armpit length and longer, you will not be so "envious". You may also want to learn to do the Dominican blowout and how to create some natural looking waves/curls. No one will ever notice the difference. Just be careful, b/c sometimes when people do that they forget that they have fragile 4a/4b relaxed hair and start doing foolish things like using permanent hair color. Good luck!

I agree. You should try to appreciate all that your hair can do. With my hair, I can wear it naturally kinky in a puff, "fake" type 3 hair with a braidout, or "fake" straight hair with a press. And when I get tired of the straight look, I can go right back to kinky/curly.

 

[Ebonygurl00]

I think viewing this beautiful ladies fotki a few days ago is what's got me feeling a little green....

http://members.fotki.com/Raehlilisynth/

Chayil

I've always loved her album!! I can see why one would get envious. Ahhh, so pretty!!!!

 

[nomoweavesfome]

I'm envious of everyone else getting silky relaxer touchups and I'm 3 days post and look more like 3 weeks! Why can't I get silky straight relaxer touch ups?

 

[nurseN98]

I'm working on appreciating what my hair can do that other's cannot.

Chayil

And that's the thought that you should focus on. Now you've gotten this confession out your system so instead of envy, focus on the gratitude.

Be grateful you got hair on your head and it's growing, healthy and you got all this great hair advice sitting right here at your disposal

And for the record, I get "envy twinges" every now & then...but I won't let those thoughts sit in my mind and crowd out my love for what I got.

 

[FlowerHair]

Like many have said, envy is a natural feeling. And we all know that the lower the numbers in hair typing, the more socially acceptable. That's why the 4:s want to be a 3, the 3:s want to be 2:s and the 2:s want to be 1:s...
It's true!

And who doesn't get envious looking at Railisynths hair!? Her hair is to die for no matter what your hair type is It's one in a million, trust me. My 3c hair is half of hers in thickness.

 

[beyondcute]

out of all the hairtyping in the world, i think people r lucky if they find one that is spot on.

i'm 3b/c but i do not have a natural curl pattern, my hair grows funny ... like:

~~~ZZZZZ~VVVVV

what type is that?

Oh crap THATS funny! I dunno what type hair I have either. I kinda gave up on typing it cuz no matter what I Thought i had peopel told me I was something different. Personally I think Im a 4a (for the simple fact that there really is no such thing as a 3c). My hair is straight up snaps My mama sas I dont have naps I have snaps cuz they snap crackle and pop when I comb them ANYWAYS. Dont worry about the typing. It does help some peopel but it sure as heck didnt help me.

 

[beyondcute]

Darn it I ant edit. But anyways i just wanted to add that I think hair types are just large categories because even within the category you will still find MAJOR differences. Thickness, density, etc.

 

[ximenia]

Hey ladies

I was talking to one of my girlfriends last night and we both confessed that we pocess a little 3abc envy. Truly, I feel guilty. I know I should be thankful for my lovely head of 4ab hair which is beautifully thick and getting healthier by the week, but honestly, in my heart, I do really envy those ladies with the beautiful ringlets. I've always wanted curly vs kinky hair and at times I feel horribly furstrated with my own kinks. I really feel it's a self image issue I need to work on because I have other issues with feeling less attractive then those petit, curly haired, light skinned girls. (Ooooh someone slap me for that!!!). I was just wondering if I'm alone on this one. Don't beat me up, I know I should be excepting and loving myself. But has anyone else struggled with this?erplexed

Chayil

that's a bold confession, you're very brave for admitting that so kudos to you. the reason ALL black women aren't natural today is because we still feel that kinky hair is ugly. it's not your fault, that's what we've been conditioned to believe. little black girls as young as 6 wish they had long, straight hair because even at that age, they've gotten the message that kinky hair is ugly. don't blame yourself, it's not a character flaw or shortcoming, it's simply the type of society in which we live and something we all struggle with. most 4 naturals do want 3c hair hence all the curl defining products they pile on and if said product doesn't 'give' them curls, they say the product was a waste. well, you have to have curls to begin with, a product can't create what's not there but that doesn't keep us from wishing it. we all know that we get more compliments when we have visible curls on our head. everyone wants features society deems are attractive, if we didn't, the plastic surgery industry wouldn't be so huge. you have to get to the point where what others and what society thinks or wants doesn't matter to you. you have to stop caring about fitting in and being attractive based on a white or mixed race standard. there are people who think 4 hair and dark skin are beautiful too because it is. there isn't anything inherently unattractive about those traits. just because racism and its equally destructive stepchild, colorism, says it doesn't make it so.