Would you say anything? Honestly?

honestly, i havent seen anyone's hair on here yet that i've just been like "dang, what did you do to your hair????" either no one's posted these kinds of pics or else i havent seen them yet and i've seen ALOT of albums--- hey....it's my thing
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but i notice good stuff about everyones hair anyway.
 
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Dolce_Dawn said:
I agree w/the majority here: I would not say anything and I would def want to know if my hair was jacked up so that it might improve.

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Ok the majority of you think this but if you all are saying that you wouldn't tell anyone but you want someone to tell you then who is doing the telling to you? because no one wants to say anything. Kind of a catch 22.
 
I won't say anything. I remember when I first went natural and an anonymous poster was not only sarcastic, but trifling as well. So I erased the comments and just let my friends comment, that way their comments good, bad, or ugly were from people I atleast knew who they were.

Remember public albums like fotki have more than LHCF lookers looking at your album. I've seen racist comments on some albums. So you have to be careful.
 
I take option B's route b/c I gotta get my hair straight b4 I could give anyone else solid advice. I still feel that I am in the learning mode. That's why many of my responses tend to be general.

That's also why I don't post my album here. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and my hair may not be to everybody's liking and I'd just as soon not deal with negativity.
 
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ms_jennifer said:
I would probably just look and not comment, and if i asked i would be tactfully honest .

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I agree, but it would be hard because I know how I am with my words
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, which is why I rather not say anything at all
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I look at the album and do not comment if the person's hair is damaged or something. I think that I'd rather someone pm me nicely if they have a tactful suggestion about helping me have healthier hair. Perhaps we can leave that in our signature line-pm any helpful comments.
 
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Wolftrap said:
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Dolce_Dawn said:
I agree w/the majority here: I would not say anything and I would def want to know if my hair was jacked up so that it might improve.

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Ok the majority of you think this but if you all are saying that you wouldn't tell anyone but you want someone to tell you then who is doing the telling to you? because no one wants to say anything. Kind of a catch 22.

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I see what you'e trying to say, but I am very hard on myself. I'm also honest. If I thought my hair were jacked up, I would start a thread about it asking for help and I wouldn't post pics unless I were satisfied w/the look of my hair. When I look at albums, unless stated otherwise, I assume that the person is PROUD of their hair or trying to track their progress. I'm not going to cut them down at the knees and I feel more comfortable giving advice if the person clearly states that they want it. I have yet to see this in albums, but usually find it in posts/thread (those asking for help).
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I would especially tell her if she WAS UNAWARE that her hair was damaged. Now if she knows that her hair looks bad and is damaged then I have nothing to say. Now if she was unaware then I would tell her what I thought she needed to know. There is a way to say everything and I would have to find a nice way to say "Look lady your hair is messed and you need a reconstructor, deep conditioner or something!"
 
Re: Would you say anything? Honestly?

honestly i would look and not make any comments, but if i was in that circumstance i would want someone to tell me. I'm open to constructive criticism. It all depends on the way you say it and if you are willing to help or not. i agree with "bollyhair"
 
If we're here to give positive advice, encouragement and offer suggestions, then I think it would be awfully discouraging to tell them that their hair was damaged and in poor condition. I think people know when their hair is jacked up and who would want to post pictures of jacked up hair (unless it was a before picture). We all had a starting point where our hair wasn't always long, and healthy. So if someone does have damaged and broken hair, then by coming here means that they are off to a great start and things can only get better. Most of our comraderie here is genuine. If I ask someone's advice about something 9 x out of 10 I already know the answer. I subscribe to the saying that if you can't say something nice, then don't say anything at all.
 
I wouldn't say anything negative. People don't always post pictures to hear how great their hair looks. Some just want to document and share their progress. For example, think what a huge inspiration that same person could be once they really turned their hair around. I think so many here feel comfortable sharing their pics good or bad. I also think people generally know if they have hair issues. The best thing to do is say something positive (doesn't have to be about the hair's condition), give tips and offer encouragement.
 
I wouldn't say anything unless they specifically asked for advice about their hair problems... I also wouldn't say anything negative no matter how tore up their hair looks b/c that's not my style. Everybody has to start from somewhere, and finding LHCF is about half the battle. The way I see it, if you are just going to say something negative and not give suggestions/encouragement, then you ain't helping the situation, so I ain't feeling you...
On the flip side, I would want someone to nicely give suggestions if I asked/complained about a certain problem. You can be honest and nice, it's possible
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CaramelHonee said:
Like the majority, unless they asked for advice, i wouldn't offer it. I would just look and keep it moving.

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ME Too.
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ChoclatePrincess said:
I would look and not make a comment unless I'm asked for my opinion and I would be honest.

If my hair was damaged I would definitely want someone to give me some good advice, i.e cutting my hair or products I should use.

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I agree.
 
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Armyqt said:
Some just want to document and share their progress. For example, think what a huge inspiration that same person could be once they really turned their hair around.

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This describes me perfectly
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. I just obtained the digital camera and I really need to document my progress. I was going to wait until my hair looked good to post my album, but to me, the most inspirational albums are the ones that show the most growth and improvement. I viewed one last month of a member whose starting point was just like mine. Now, her hair is between shoulder length and bra-strap--it was so encouraging. I'm crossing my fingers that one day I achieve that kind of success.
 
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Britt said:
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ChoclatePrincess said:
I would look and not make a comment unless I'm asked for my opinion and I would be honest.


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I see plenty albums on here that I would want to comment on but I choose not to b/c the person may be upset by what I have to say. I think many people need to just get a cut and start over, butttt nooo they rather hold on to thier hair and try to bring it back to life with "moisture, moisture, moisture" as the board emphatically professes. Sometimes, all u need is a fresh blunt even cut, start from scratch and then u can "moisture, moisture, moisture."

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There it is.. this is exactly what I think. Some people need to cut or a heavy trim then moisturize. I just got my hair evenly trimmed after looking at some of the pics in my album that were posted in May. I must say my hair looks great now.
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Armyqt said:
I wouldn't say anything negative. People don't always post pictures to hear how great their hair looks. Some just want to document and share their progress. For example, think what a huge inspiration that same person could be once they really turned their hair around. I think so many here feel comfortable sharing their pics good or bad. I also think people generally know if they have hair issues. The best thing to do is say something positive (doesn't have to be about the hair's condition), give tips and offer encouragement.

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That's exactly why I have an album; to keep track of progress. It's helpful to me and I don't mind advice at all! I just think that you don't have to dog a person out to give it, that's all.
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I wouldn't say anything unless asked for advice. Plus, maybe I don't know their whole hair history. I wouldn't want to respond negatively without knowing all the facts.

Sometimes I get comments in my album and I can tell the person only viewed one picture b/c they'll ask me something or comment on something that's so off the wall.
 
If the person had it written somewhere that they wanted suggestions and feedback was appreciated I would probably do somethin private like a PM as suggested. If not I'd leave it, but I know for me when I post my album I WANT all feedback, even negative, like in a helpful manner (not mean like "u looked jacked up"). Some ppl just wanna post for compliments and even if you don't agree I guess you gotta respect it, and if you think they look bad don't comment.
 
One thing you have to remember is that their hair may look fabulous to them because it was even more jacked up before. You never know where they are coming from. My hair is pretty wack now but I know it is in better shape than say 2 years ago. And someone ripping me about my hair would only discourage me and make me do something real stupid. (I'm a bit sensitive to mean comments). And I, personally, only want advice when I ask for it. I am my hair's biggest critic and I don't need anyone else (unless you are a professional) to criticize it. JMO.
 
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Neen said:
One thing you have to remember is that their hair may look fabulous to them because it was even more jacked up before. You never know where they are coming from. My hair is pretty wack now but I know it is in better shape than say 2 years ago. And someone ripping me about my hair would only discourage me and make me do something real stupid. (I'm a bit sensitive to mean comments). And I, personally, only want advice when I ask for it. I am my hair's biggest critic and I don't need anyone else (unless you are a professional) to criticize it. JMO.

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Good point...sort of related to what I was saying. It's almost like you need enough of a person's history to respond in certain circumstance.
 
I look for something positive about someone's hair - relaxed, texturized, natural or transitioning and I can usually spot it, whether it is shine, thickness, a nice length (if that's what that person is going for), beautiful curls or waves, a pretty style, etc. My compliments are sincere. However, I give advice only when asked.
 
b. look and just not make any comments

I would be assuming that she already knows it's damaged and that's why she's here. But if she's making statements that her hair is so healthy and so on, I will make a nice comment. And yes, I could like a honest opinion if my hair is looking jacked-up.
 
I would look and not make any comments because you can never tell the tone of a non-positive comment that's written. It's up to the reader to decifier how the comment is taken and that person might mistake your truthfulness as an attack; or your recommendations as superiority.

Don't worry though, like others, I posted picks before looking at the heads of hair on this board so if they initally think their hair is the "bomb"...after looking at the beautiful heathy heads of hair here (all lengths) they'll come to the realization that they have some work to do.
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I also would want honesty rather than a fake "ur hair looks great". There are times that I would just quickly look at the album and not give a comment but I did give an honest opinion one time and I was ignored
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