Would you respond?

[browneyedgrl]

Been dating this guy. I wasn't really into him at first but he pursued me hard and eventually grew on me. We exchanged numbers and eventually went out. At first he texted or called daily and said all the right things to make me fall for him.

Well we've reached that phase where he's now always "busy" or doesn't have time to talk. Those daily "good morning beautiful" texts have stopped and now days pass where I don't hear from him. It seems that we've flipped the script and now I'm the one doing most or the reaching out. At this point I've decided I'm too old for games so I will just ignore him. I feel if he really wants me he'll make that effort.

I literally deleted his number and there has been no contact for about 5 days now. Well today I get a text from him saying.: "Every time I hear______ I think of you" and he names a song I love. This was around 2pm and I haven't responded yet because I don't know if I should. Should I respond, confront him or continue to ignore? I want to be with him I just don't have time for flip floppy men.

 

[DarkJoy]

Continue to ignore.

How long you been dating? He's either gotten lazy or seeing someone else. But really 5 days of no contact with no emergency reason is inexcusable. Id tell him to kiss my arse by just blocking him.

 

[CaraWalker]

probably not. and if i did i would expect to deal with more of the same.

on a side note this is why i no longer entertain men that have to grow on me. i didnt like you in the first place and now you want to play me to the left? id rather get played by a guy i handpicked for myself instead

 

[MissJ]

Ignore him. He's shown you he's not really interested.

 

[RocStar]

Been dating this guy. I wasn't really into him at first but he pursued me hard and eventually grew on me. We exchanged numbers and eventually went out. At first he texted or called daily and said all the right things to make me fall for him.

Well we've reached that phase where he's now always "busy" or doesn't have time to talk. Those daily "good morning beautiful" texts have stopped and now days pass where I don't hear from him. It seems that we've flipped the script and now I'm the one doing most or the reaching out. At this point I've decided I'm too old for games so I will just ignore him. I feel if he really wants me he'll make that effort.

I literally deleted his number and there has been no contact for about 5 days now. Well today I get a text from him saying.: "Every time I hear______ I think of you" and he names a song I love. This was around 2pm and I haven't responded yet because I don't know if I should. Should I respond, confront him or continue to ignore? I want to be with him I just don't have time for flip floppy men.

You should ask yourself if you think he wants to be with you. If he acts like he wants to be with you.

If it were me, I would continue to ignore, block and keep moving.

 

[MissJ]

probably not. and if i did i would expect to deal with more of the same.

on a side note this is why i no longer entertain men that have to grow on me. i didnt like you in the first place and now you want to play me to the left? id rather get played by a guy i handpicked for myself instead

Amen! ......

 

[daydreem2876]

for what? you'd just be setting yourself up for more of the same. Whatever his reasons, if you were important enough to him he would not be out of touch for longer than a day or two, much less five, unless his mama died. Don't let his words blind you to his behavior he's showing you exactly who he is.

 

[Jas123]

Nothing for me to say... ITA with what every previous poster has said

 

[SmileyNY]

Men like a chase. Maybe you got too comfortable too soon. Guys like a challenge and if you make it to easy for them, their egos will take over and they will start thinking they don't have to even try to keep your attention.

However, I will say that 5 days is a very long time. Even if he IS into you... he sounds like he might either be a jerk or so insecure that he's scared to express his feelings. Either way... huge turnoff.

I wouldn't reply. He'd need more than just a tired line to get my attention after 5 days. He'd have to be a man by admitting that he misses me (in plain english) and then give a freaking great explanation for why it took him so long to reach out.

 

[GoldenRule]

He thought he had a better offer and went to investigate it. Once he found out the grass wasn't greener, he came back. Later Gator for Mr. TruGreen, you snooze, you lose.

 

[*SkolarStar*]

I'd use him for free food and movies and keep it at that. He's not worth the trouble. Clearly he's not interested for whatever reason so there's no point in entertaining it. Don't reply until he calls you.

 

[nlamr2013]

You know you shouldn't op. Lol

 

[browneyedgrl]

Thanks. I'll continue to ignore him. If he really wants my attention he knows where to find me in person.

But I have a question for anyone who ignored a guy in a similar situation. Have you ever given a man a taste of his own medicine and later have him crawl back and come to his senses? Like he realized what he lost and you both eventually worked it out for the better? Just wondering if there is any hope for these kinds of situations.

 

[oneastrocurlie]

What everyone else said....

 

[GoldenRule]

Thanks. I'll continue to ignore him. If he really wants my attention he knows where to find me in person.

But I have a question for anyone who ignored a guy in a similar situation. Have you ever given a man a taste of his own medicine and later have him crawl back and come to his senses? Like he realized what he lost and you both eventually worked it out for the better? Just wondering if there is any hope for these kinds of situations.

Yes and no...you have to realize that you will break up with almost EVERY SINGLE GUY you date. You only marry ONE. When things don't work out, don't beat yourself up or spin your wheels endlessly thinking "what if". Yes, he MAY wake up one day and realize that you are the best thing that ever happened to him and come crawling back and you'll live happily ever after until the NEXT pair of DDs or twerking arse catches his eye and he's off to the races AGAIN. This guy is wishy washy and you deserve better.

 

[LiftedUp]

Don't respond. At this point if he really wants to reconcile he should call.

 

[LdyKamz]

Thanks. I'll continue to ignore him. If he really wants my attention he knows where to find me in person.

But I have a question for anyone who ignored a guy in a similar situation. Have you ever given a man a taste of his own medicine and later have him crawl back and come to his senses? Like he realized what he lost and you both eventually worked it out for the better? Just wondering if there is any hope for these kinds of situations.

Of course. It almost always happens. When a man notices that he's been put on the back burner when he still wanted you around (in whatever capacity, even if for just a backup) he comes crawling back. And more often than not you won't even want him anymore.

 

[nlamr2013]

Thanks. I'll continue to ignore him. If he really wants my attention he knows where to find me in person.

But I have a question for anyone who ignored a guy in a similar situation. Have you ever given a man a taste of his own medicine and later have him crawl back and come to his senses? Like he realized what he lost and you both eventually worked it out for the better? Just wondering if there is any hope for these kinds of situations.

Nope. When people show you who they are believe them. If he's all lazy a few months in how about years, decades. You 'work it out' next thing you know you're 60 unfulfilled and bitter.

 

[Farida]

Been dating this guy. I wasn't really into him at first but he pursued me hard and eventually grew on me. We exchanged numbers and eventually went out. At first he texted or called daily and said all the right things to make me fall for him. Well we've reached that phase where he's now always "busy" or doesn't have time to talk. Those daily "good morning beautiful" texts have stopped and now days pass where I don't hear from him. It seems that we've flipped the script and now I'm the one doing most or the reaching out. At this point I've decided I'm too old for games so I will just ignore him. I feel if he really wants me he'll make that effort. I literally deleted his number and there has been no contact for about 5 days now. Well today I get a text from him saying.: "Every time I hear______ I think of you" and he names a song I love. This was around 2pm and I haven't responded yet because I don't know if I should. Should I respond, confront him or continue to ignore? I want to be with him I just don't have time for flip floppy men.

I would ignore him. The ball is now in his court. How do you ignore a woman you are supposedly into and then text her like all is well? How old is he, 12? No thanks.

 

[lux10023]

exactly--5 days--i haven't heard from you and your to busy for me--he would be so non-existent----ugh



silence is so golden....ppl dont know what to do when you don't respond to them...dude would have to run into me outside for me to even acknowledge him because all communication would seize!

I would ignore him. The ball is now in his court. How do you ignore a woman you are supposedly into and then text her like all is well? How old is he, 12? No thanks.

 

[Desert Skye]

Oh i was in this situation once back when i was younger. Turned out he was using me as an "option". He would disappear and reappear like that just to make sure he still had his "options". When i finally saw what was going on and ignored him, he freaked out and tried to contact me all throughout the day. Nah, the option was now gone.

 

[ms.mimi]

I wasn't really into him at first...... I just don't have time for flip floppy men.

It's funny how there was something that you initially weren't feeling. Trust and follow your 1st mind.
He has shown you your deal-breaker. He has shown you what the next year, 2 years, etc.... is going to be like. The chase, the capture, the escape, the chase, the capture, the escape, repeat. uh

"When people show you who they are, believe them."~Dr. Maya Angelou

 

[southerncitygirl]

I think he's juggling all kinds of random puss & you are like a backup/fallback for him cause the others are not working out or have fallen by the wayside. Ignore him cause if he's truly into you & wants to be bothered he won't just text he will call you.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Gosh, I'm torn....

On one hand, 5 days is a LONG time..... I mean, you guys were dating for how long again???

But on the OTHER hand... Idk.... I have always heard from men AND women that once men have "caught" you, they usually draw back a little bit (either now because they're no longer in the "hunter" mentality, OR because they feel like they can ease up and relax a little bit now that they know you are also on the same page).... It's just natural. I don't think ANY man continues on pursuing a woman with the SAME intensity he did when he was first trying to get you.

I'm not saying he should be lazy, but to expect the SAME type/level of intensity and contact as he was doing in the beginning?? I think that's somewhat unrealistic. erplexed


WITH THAT SAID HOWEVER....... I DO feel that 5 days IS quite a long time to go with not even a text hello or "how was your day today?" That's no bueno. Not only that, but it's kind of rude.

I think the no contact idea is good....Or, maybe just respond REALLY REALLY late (maybe a day or two later) and say: "Oh boy, I've been so busy lately! Hope you're doing well!" and leave it like that.

TRUST me... a man who is REALLY into you will immediately get back on his "A-Game" and will contact you a little more frequently because in HIS mind he's wondering if maybe you've gotten "bored" and have entertained the interest of other men. Make sure to mention that you've been "oh so busy" and see what he does/says....

He's no dummy lol.

But if he's really not interested, he'll be perfectly OKAY with you being "busy" and won't even wonder what you've been up to. erplexed If that happens, and MORE time goes by in between contact, DON'T contact him.... And if he DOES try to contact you, just say: "Hey, you know I'm thinking that this isn't really working out. I think maybe we want different things out of a relationship, so I think it's best if we go our separate ways...."

 

[sj10460]

dude sounds crazy and like a narcissist. Sounds like my ex

 

[naturalmanenyc]

browneyedgrl

There really was nothing to respond to. He didn't ask a question or anything.
I would ignore him and move on. He seems flaky and he's obviously put you in position 2 or 3 on his rotation if he's going 5 days without contacting you.

Don't make someone a priority when they make you an option.

Been dating this guy. I wasn't really into him at first but he pursued me hard and eventually grew on me. We exchanged numbers and eventually went out. At first he texted or called daily and said all the right things to make me fall for him.

Well we've reached that phase where he's now always "busy" or doesn't have time to talk. Those daily "good morning beautiful" texts have stopped and now days pass where I don't hear from him. It seems that we've flipped the script and now I'm the one doing most or the reaching out. At this point I've decided I'm too old for games so I will just ignore him. I feel if he really wants me he'll make that effort.

I literally deleted his number and there has been no contact for about 5 days now. Well today I get a text from him saying.: "Every time I hear______ I think of you" and he names a song I love. This was around 2pm and I haven't responded yet because I don't know if I should. Should I respond, confront him or continue to ignore? I want to be with him I just don't have time for flip floppy men.

 

[Prettymetty]

Lemme get this straight: He pursued you, yall hung out for a bit and then he fell off the face of the Earth for 5 days? Maybe he just likes the thrill of the chase. He's probably chasing another woman that is't interested in him. It's a technique average joe guys use to make women want them.

 

[ScorpioBeauty09]

Umm, yeah I'd need a lot more than a "thinking about you" text, especially after 5 days of no contact. And what was there to respond to anyway? I don't know how to respond to texts like that even if things are going great. I'm not one for small talk. This one's a no brainer--ignore.

 

[Kindheart]

Disappear on him. He probably thinks he got you ,that boosted his ego and thinks you ll do the chase . Aaaaand you don't have time for that .

 

[Enyo]

Continue to ignore. How long you been dating? He's either gotten lazy or seeing someone else. But really 5 days of no contact with no emergency reason is inexcusable. Id tell him to kiss my arse by just blocking him.

I want to quote this because I want to reiterate that this is the absolute best suggestion! I have always attracted flaky man that do mess like this. And I agree that you should block him. Not just because he's being a jerk, but because seeing texts and hearing messages from him can cause conflict. Sometimes, I go as far as deleting the number from the incoming and outgoing call list to so that I can forget what his telly actually is. It's harder to contact someone on impulse when you have to look at your phone bill to get the number.