Would You Reach Out to Him ...

[loolalooh]

UPDATE: Thanks everyone! The verdict is in: The woman will not reach out to him. While she thinks this guy might've been "the one", this door might be better left closed. There are other "the ones" out there.

*************************************

... or continue on your separate path?

Scenario: You and your ex were together for 2.5 years. It was a really serious relationship. You two were in love and became friends with each other's parents. But the relationship ended on ugly terms to the point where neither of you spoke to each other ever again. Now it is 3 years later, and you would like to rekindle a friendship with him and, if possible, a relationship. You know for a fact that he is currently single. You would like to send him an icebreaker email.

Would you do it? or would you continue with your separate path and no contact?

Explain.

 

[belletropjolie]

Yes, because if you don't you'll always wonder...

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

How bad was the break-up? He's probably single for a reason, depending on how you two broke up.

 

[ScorpioBeauty09]

If it was an ugly break up then no. What would be the reason for reaching out? It's hard for me to put aside hurt feelings to extend an olive branch and be genuine about it. It's hard for me to do this even in my female friendships that have ended badly.

 

[DarkJoy]

Depends on the reason for the breakup and his behavior throughout that scenario.

 

[jazzerz]

I've done this before. Unfortunately it turned into a vicious circle of us breaking up and getting back together - then breaking up again.

 

[EagleEyes85]

I wouldnt try to get back with him, but I would try to contact him to make peace. I feel like if you dont you may forever wonder what could have been. I think even if its small words without the expectation that you 2 will hook back up or even be friends, it may help you both have peace.

 

[miss cosmic]

I wouldn't because reaching out first has never worked for me. I think it's because it takes the 'chasing' away from the guy. If possible i'd 'get on his radar' and if he doesn't bite keep it moving.

 

[SelahOco]

I'd just add him on Facebook and catch up.

 

[Jmartjrmd]

I tried this before I met my current SO and it only resulted in more heartache. The guy just wasn't "it" and it hurt me more than it helped.

Ask yourself some serious questions:
1. Would you be ok if he only wanted a friendship
2. Would you be ok if he didn't want a friendship or a relationship
3. Why would getting back into a relationship this time be different
4. Is he really worth it to your sanity and time....has he shown any signs he's been thinking of you as much as you've been thinking of him
5.Why do you want to get back into his life

 

[Cichelle]

Forward ever, backward never


...especially when it involves very bad breakups. It's one thing to make peace. But other than that, I keep my life moving forward from things like that. JMMO, of course. I don't know the details of your situation.

 

[Ganjababy]

If he was to blame then NO.

 

[TinyBlu]

Considering that things ended "badly", I would question why you want to reconcile (and according to your words, hopefully get back together)now?

As others have said, it depends on the true reasons for why you broke up (behaviors, etc). Also, as others have asked, are you prepared for the rejection if you reach out?

IMO, reaching out to him makes you EXTREMELY vulnerable, and it does not seem that simply making peace is your only motive in this situation.

Please examine your true reasons for wanting to reach out to him. If it's lonliness, I would say try to find some activities and/or friends to occupy your time. Take care of you first. Everything else will fall into place.

 

[MD_Lady]

No- An ex is an ex for a reason.

 

[FelaShrine]

I would rather it be the other way around like that Google Plus commercial about the dude asking his ex gf for a coffee date

That ad is so cute yet it makes me so sad

 

[cocomochaa]

do it or you'll always wonder what if.

What ifs are enemies of progress.

 

[cocomochaa]

I would rather it be the other way around like that Google Plus commercial about the dude asking his ex gf for a coffee date

That ad is so cute yet it makes me so sad

that advert made me sad.

 

[loolalooh]

UPDATE: Thanks everyone! The verdict is in: The woman will not reach out to him. While she thinks this guy might've been "the one", this door might be better left closed. There are other "the ones" out there.