Would you be okay with your daughter cheating on her boyfriend?

[SincerelyJane]

I was talking to my friend and she was saying how her dad got mad at her younger sister for going out with another man while she was in a relationship with someone else. I don't think it was even a real date, they just went shopping. erplexed

I don't really consider that cheating btw, just wanted to make the thread title interesting.

Also the dude she went on a date with is lawyer, and I think he makes more money than her current BF who is a nurse. So... I think that's where her mind was at lol . Just being honest! But her father shut that down. I was surprised that the father got upset! He said he didn't raise his daughter like that.

I was shocked. I can't see myself getting upset with my daughter for something like that lol.

Both my parents know about me and multiple dating ways and don't really care. Or at least they haven't said anything. I think they raised me just fine lol.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

Why does her dad even know about the shopping trip guy?

I didn't make it a habit to let my family meet the men I was dating and I'd hope my would be daughter/son would do the same. I only want to meet the significant other when it's serious.

My dad only met one guy, DH.

 

[SincerelyJane]

Why does her dad even know about the shopping trip guy?

I didn't make it a habit to let my family meet the men I was dating and I'd hope my would be daughter/son would do the same. I only want to meet the significant other when it's serious.

My dad only met one guy, DH.

She told the mom, the mom told the dad. I tell my mom more about my dating life than my dad, but she tells my dad everything (and I know that) so it gets back to him anyway. So I could totally see how something like that could happen.

But I'm getting the sense you would be upset about something like that. Interesting.

 

[lux10023]

I would want my daughter to have options and thats what dating is..no?
and then proceed with choosing the best guy who treats her amazing.

dads are diff they maybe old fashioned---now if she introduced her bf to her father and is dating other dudes that maybe conflicting

i remember my father wanting me to settle down with this plumber guy i was seeing yes he was a good guy but it wasn't that deep---but being a plumber in my dads day was a very honorable job so to speak...which is fine no problems with plumbers but daddy lux needs options mmkayyy lol

yrs later my dad would say what happen to so and so the plumber---im like dad let it go! (dude really had a lil winky and i didnt care how much my dad loved him lil winky wasnt gonna work in the longterm lmaoooo)))

i dont think a dad ever gets used to his dd dating let alone dating more than one guy without them applying their male perspective on what that conveys--a son can bring home a new pretty girl each month and most fathers would be grinning and high-fiving yeah thats my son!

i dont see anything wrong with a young lady dating---daddy is limiting her dating pool and sometimes women never learn how to multi date settling down with one wrong person after another...anyhoooo i dont know the situation but hope all goes well

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Is she grown? I'm assuming she still lives with him for him to know. Maybe they're not exclusive so dating around isn't wrong.

 

[SincerelyJane]

I would want my daughter to have options and thats what dating is..no?
and then proceed with choosing the best guy who treats her amazing.

dads are diff they maybe old fashioned---now if she introduced her bf to her father and is dating other dudes that maybe conflicting

i remember my father wanting me to settle down with this plumber guy i was seeing yes he was a good guy but it wasn't that deep---but being a plumber in my dads day was a very honorable job so to speak...which is fine no problems with plumbers but daddy lux needs options mmkayyy lol

yrs later my dad would say what happen to so and so the plumber---im like dad let it go! (dude really had a lil winky and i didnt care how much my dad loved him lil winky wasnt gonna work in the longterm lmaoooo)))

i dont think a dad ever gets used to his dd dating let alone dating more than one guy without them applying their male perspective on what that conveys--a son can bring home a new pretty girl each month and most fathers would be grinning and high-fiving yeah thats my son!

i dont see anything wrong with a young lady dating---daddy is limiting her dating pool and sometimes women never learn how to multi date settling down with one wrong person after another...anyhoooo i dont know the situation but hope all goes well

lol I don't know why the plumber situation makes me laugh but it does

Parents do that though. you have long since moved on, and they'll bring up that one guy from way back that they just really took a liking to for whatever reason. but the one they're not really feeling, they won't even remember the name

 

[carcajada]

I wonder if the dad would be just as angry if it were his son? (if he had a son)

 

[Dartagnan]

I wonder if the dad would be just as angry if it were his son? (if he had a son)

Probably not but lets not act like y'all don't have different "roles" when it comes to dating/sex or does "roles" only apply when it benefits y'all like not paying for dates . Personally though my immediate family isn't for that cheating stuff so mom, dad, sisters/brother would throw me clean under the bus if I ever did so. They don't have to worry about it because as Ive said many times I only date, talk to, whatever people call it one person at a time anyway.

 

[SincerelyJane]

Is she grown? I'm assuming she still lives with him for him to know. Maybe they're not exclusive so dating around isn't wrong.

LOL yeah she's grown. But its the holidays so you know family comes to visit and stuff. The parents are usually pretty far away most of the year

 

[Iwanthealthyhair67]

it's refreshing to see a Father, involved with the parenting of his child

 

[Crackers Phinn]

I don't think it was even a real date, they just went shopping.

Dad is mad because shopping isn't a date, it's trickin. Unless they are straight gutter, no parent wants to witness this behavior in their child.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Dad is mad because shopping isn't a date, it's trickin. Unless they are straight gutter, no parent wants to witness this behavior in their child.

Lmao! I hadn't thought of it that way. Hmmm.

 

[SincerelyJane]

Dad is mad because shopping isn't a date, it's trickin. Unless they are straight gutter, no parent wants to witness this behavior in their child.

lmao I kinda suspect this too. She's kind of spoiled and always gotten everything she wants so I'm sure he's like "wth you need to trick for??!"

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

Dad is mad because shopping isn't a date, it's trickin. Unless they are straight gutter, no parent wants to witness this behavior in their child.

Lol! Straight no chaser

 

[Fine 4s]

Probably not but lets not act like y'all don't have different "roles" when it comes to dating/sex or does "roles" only apply when it benefits y'all like not paying for dates . Personally though my immediate family isn't for that cheating stuff so mom, dad, sisters/brother would throw me clean under the bus if I ever did so. They don't have to worry about it because as Ive said many times I only date, talk to, whatever people call it one person at a time anyway.

Everything is done with one person at a time, unless ur in threesomes etc *giggle*

J/k

 

[1QTPie]

I wouldn't want to know that my daughter was spreading it wide and laying it low. She can keep that to herself. Even if I don't like the boy, I would prefer her to be honest and completely single. I don't want to raise a sneaky, conniving liar. Plus, these new negroes are crazy, you never know what a scorned man will do these days.

 

[barbiesocialite]

single until married.

Heaxdom is one thing. Exploring your options as a single person not in a committed relationship is another. unless my daughter was engaged and actively planning a wedding, she's free to do as she pleases. Sleeping with every tom, dick & harry is never okay but commitment as obligation/responsibility/entitlement requires one to BE committed. So as long as my daughter isnt engaging in reckless behavior or causing damage to her life, have fun and play on playa. only young once, she might as well get it out of her system early. save commitment and devotion to the one she truly will be committed and devoted to--her husband.......

 

[LeftRightRepeat]

I wonder if the dad would be just as angry if it were his son? (if he had a son)

I wouldn't want to see my son doing that. Not sure what my husband would think about that kind of situation though...not that dh was a "player" but I don't know if it would be a "boys will be boys" kind of attitude or he would want his son to be like he was

 

[Fine 4s]

She fears a bad rep (among many other forms of backlash) while he gets accolades for the number of women he's slept with. What we value differs so much.

Anyway, the dogs I know have mothers who would never support such behavior but, environment trumps what momma says any day.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

SincerelyJane

I wouldn't condone heauxing around. If she has brought home one dude and introduced him to the family as her serious boyfriend, then I'd be curious about some random dude showing up to take her shopping. It would be the same for my son.

I am all for dating multiple men/women at once but bringing multiple men/women home to meet the family is a no go.

She told the mom, the mom told the dad. I tell my mom more about my dating life than my dad, but she tells my dad everything (and I know that) so it gets back to him anyway. So I could totally see how something like that could happen.

But I'm getting the sense you would be upset about something like that. Interesting.

 

[SincerelyJane]

@SincerelyJane

I wouldn't condone heauxing around. If she has brought home one dude and introduced him to the family as her serious boyfriend, then I'd be curious about some random dude showing up to take her shopping. It would be the same for my son.

I am all for dating multiple men/women at once but bringing multiple men/women home to meet the family is a no go.

Well I can't know for sure but I highly doubt she's slept with the guy . I really wouldn't call her hanging out with a different guy "heauxing around", even if she did bring dude home (which she didn't).

My parents have met 2 different guys that I have dated, both long term relationships (>3 yrs). Unless something reeeeeally drastic happens, they will probably be meeting at least one more dude prior to me getting married. I'm an adult, they know I don't sleep around and they know I need to get date in order to get married.

If I lived closer to home, they would have probably met more. My sister lived at home for awhile in her twenties, so my parents met guys who came to pick her up on dates, came to church functions, etc. I don't really see the big deal. I can see not having the whole rotation showing up at your house, but I don't think we have to be getting married before someone can meet my parents.... that's a little bit much IMO.

 

[Farida]

The situation in the OP sounds like an overreaction unless there's something else the dad knows that I don't. But I don't stand for cheating. My really good friend's ex-wife's trifling family used to go on family outings with the guy she was cheating with. WTH? She would say she is going out of state to visit family and then she, her side piece and family would hang out.

If my unmarried child wants to date several people that's ok; but I don't believe in misleading folks so I would not be happy with my kid telling a dude they are exclusive while seeing other people.

 

[Dartagnan]

Well I can't know for sure but I highly doubt she's slept with the guy . I really wouldn't call her hanging out with a different guy "heauxing around", even if she did bring dude home (which she didn't).

My parents have met 2 different guys that I have dated, both long term relationships (>3 yrs). Unless something reeeeeally drastic happens, they will probably be meeting at least one more dude prior to me getting married. I'm an adult, they know I don't sleep around and they know I need to get date in order to get married.

If I lived closer to home, they would have probably met more. My sister lived at home for awhile in her twenties, so my parents met guys who came to pick her up on dates, came to church functions, etc. I don't really see the big deal. I can see not having the whole rotation showing up at your house, but I don't think we have to be getting married before someone can meet my parents.... that's a little bit much IMO.

Yeah I noticed this seems to be some big thing with some men/women but never got it either for the same reason you put. It must have something to do with how dating/courting used to be done that Im not up on admittedly.

 

[brg240]

I wonder if the dad would be just as angry if it were his son? (if he had a son)

My father has gotten upset over my brothers' dating habits before.

I think that taking women that aren't their girlfriend on shopping trips would disappoint him if they were seriously dating.