Women who don't give their DH 'any' an expect things to last

vevster

Well-Known Member
Like his not cheating or the marriage.

I knew someone like that and she is now divorced.

Discuss?
 
I don't know about that. People like sex, esp men. Why wouldn't she give him any? Was he bad in bed?
 
ok so off topic. How much should a woman give a man. My husband acts like he wants it every freaking day. Is marriage meant to be one of those soon as it goes up lets make it go back down types of things. Really i just want to know lol.
Who does this? Is there some type of sex going on?
Sorry to ask so many questions.
 
what in the world....:perplexed

You can give all and men still cheat, leave .....

You never know all that goes on in a marriage...:ohwell:
 
what in the world....:perplexed

You can give all and men still cheat, leave .....

You never know all that goes on in a marriage...:ohwell:

True, sex doesn't make a man stay with you. If they are emotionally connected to you, along with a healthy sex relationship (meaning what you do agree upon sexually), that's when a man is committed. If a man isn't emotionally connected to a woman, be it his wife, fiance, girlfriend, etc., the woman can turn all kinds of tricks, and it won't do a thing.
 
Well if he isn't getting any at ALL..I don't know. Sex won't make a man stay but it can make him leave. There must be something else going on..the no sex was a symptom of a bigger problem.
 
True, sex doesn't make a man stay with you. If they are emotionally connected to you, along with a healthy sex relationship (meaning what you do agree upon sexually), that's when a man is committed. If a man isn't emotionally connected to a woman, be it his wife, fiance, girlfriend, etc., the woman can turn all kinds of tricks, and it won't do a thing.

some women are prone to settle for the man who looks good on paper for security vs real emotional, physical connection and they may happen to not enjoy the sex with their man, so even if he is all emotionally into her or trying to be there is still a disconnect, even if she does happen to have sex with him, that disconnect is felt at way deeper levels, and its always some sort of dissatisfaction going on that can manifest into problems on the intimate level

and vice versa......alot of men's biggest threat is being open to a woman so sometimes he chooses to settle for the woman who looks good on paper, but he knows that she won't be the person who can get him open and hurt him....she looks good, has good wife qualities, good mother qualities, good job and he thinks she's "cool" and she "loves him"....and that is the wife who may go out of her way to jump thru hoops and keep him pleased and that disconnect is there, so no matter what she does and how much there is still that deeper level of dissatisfaction

thats why I personally feel love, passion, openess and love make for good relationships...esp marriages, those are the relationships that have the opportunity to grow in love and grow with each other........I know too many people who will skip the above on one end or the other....either its the husband whos settling or the wife who is settling, or its both,...and things may be cool and comfy, and they get along and sometimes people won't stray......sometimes they may grow into each other and blossom.... but alot of times they do stray and these days people even with all the hassles that may come still leave
 
I haven't been here long, but this is the strangest thread yet. What do you mean that she doesn't give him any? ANY? Did she give him some before the marriage? Any? Were they virgins? Did he know what he was getting into? Any?

There are celibate marriages that last for decades. You never know.

From what I've seen, celibate marriages are usually for gay couples, (married to a spouse as a 'cover').
 
Sex is a part of marriage. I really feel like people should not marry a person if they have no intentions of connecting with them emotionally and sexually. It's really selfish. If you can have two people who never even saw eachother until the day they were married still be able to connect (this is what the Kama Sutra has been used for centuries) sexually and emotionally...I don't see why two people who courted eachother and actually had the option of marrying or not even bother.
 
I don't think a man should leave just because he doesn't get sex. Lack of sex is a sign of a deeper issue which should be dealt with if the couple wants to stay together.

Maybe he was acting a fool so she didn't want to give him any? It takes two to tango.

Regardless, both of them should have worked hard to get the sex back on track as well as deal with other problems. Relationships aren't easy and it's difficult to say something specific about your friend's marriage when we know so little...
 
I was thinking about this last night.......MOST of my married friends have screwed up sex lives but they seem happy otherwise. I understand not wanting it during or right after pregnancy, but two married, healthy people sleeping next to each other...celibate.....I don't understand!

I wonder if some men must like the idea of marrying a low sex drive woman becasue........a. he doesn't have to worry about her cheating......or b. doesn't have to "work" to please her in bed because she's just not into it anyway, or .......c. he just is not into sex either.:nono:
 
I don't think a man should leave just because he doesn't get sex. Lack of sex is a sign of a deeper issue which should be dealt with if the couple wants to stay together.

Maybe he was acting a fool so she didn't want to give him any? It takes two to tango.

Regardless, both of them should have worked hard to get the sex back on track as well as deal with other problems. Relationships aren't easy and it's difficult to say something specific about your friend's marriage when we know so little...

lack of real emotional connection and openess makes for not so great communication in alot of couples....its always definitely a deeper issue going on that most times if the individual is not willing to face, they definitely aren't willing to bring their partner in on it.....that closed offness and lack of intimacy isn't just destroying to the sex life, its just that its hard to hide in the physical aspect of the relationship, while easy to hide in the emotional realm...and alot of folks are hiding on purpose for one reason or another
 
I know of two couples like this. In one case, the wife had issues where sex was uncomfortable for her, but she refused to go and get any kind of treatment. After sticking around for about 5 or 6 years w/o sex, the husband went out and got another woman, who is now married to. The first wife cried a river and tried to get him back, but he wasn't interested any more. The other couple haven't had sex in over 25 years. She doesn't want it, not sure why, though. They are miserable, but they stay together for whatever reason. I believe she would have a natural born fit if he left.
 
lack of real emotional connection and openess makes for not so great communication in alot of couples....its always definitely a deeper issue going on that most times if the individual is not willing to face, they definitely aren't willing to bring their partner in on it.....that closed offness and lack of intimacy isn't just destroying to the sex life, its just that its hard to hide in the physical aspect of the relationship, while easy to hide in the emotional realm...and alot of folks are hiding on purpose for one reason or another

I agree with everything you posted here tiara76:yep:
 
I am sorry for ANYONE in a marriage under false pretenses.

If you do NOT talk about these things PRIOR to getting married, you cannot be surprised or amazed when things don't work out like you THOUGHT they would. It's unfortunate, but it all basically boils down to the same thing - LACK OF COMMUNICATION.
 
Like his not cheating or the marriage.

I knew someone like that and she is now divorced.

Discuss?


I don't see how it could last either, except if it was health-related.

Men, by nature, are sexual, visual beings. But I think the misconception is that women, by nature, are not. We are, very much so, but it takes a different route for us to get there.

I think as a married couple, you should have sex more often than not (Dr. Phil says this too). Will you be aroused every time you do, probably not. But sometimes it's just preventive. Just like husbands do things for their wives that they don't feel like doing sometimes, so it is with sex.

I know we women think that's all they think about, and that's cuz it is. So do it so he can think about something else....LOL
 
Having sex with your husband, in and of itself, will not keep him from cheating.

Not having sex with your husband for a long time (or for the most part) can, in and of itself, lead to him seeking sex outside of marriage.
 
I think as a married couple, you should have sex more often than not (Dr. Phil says this too). Will you be aroused every time you do, probably not. But sometimes it's just preventive. Just like husbands do things for their wives that they don't feel like doing sometimes, so it is with sex.

My favorite Dr. Phil quote: "Sex is only 10% of a good marriage, but it is 90% of a bad marriage."
 
I know a couple women like this.
It is almost like they do not care how their SO's get sorted out.
 
I was thinking about this last night.......MOST of my married friends have screwed up sex lives but they seem happy otherwise. I understand not wanting it during or right after pregnancy, but two married, healthy people sleeping next to each other...celibate.....I don't understand!

I wonder if some men must like the idea of marrying a low sex drive woman becasue........a. he doesn't have to worry about her cheating......or b. doesn't have to "work" to please her in bed because she's just not into it anyway, or .......c. he just is not into sex either.:nono:

I vote for options A & B.
 
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