Wish You Could Go Natural???

[LocksOfLuV]

Briefly, a couple of things:

--the comparison of the n-word to "creamy crack" is weak and insulting. The n-word takes things to an entirely different level.

--I do respect that other women don't like the word and I'll even at admit that when I first started all of this, I was a bit "militant" about it (my screen name IS RelaxerRehab) and my time here at LCHF has softened that stance as I have observed how some people can handle the chemical and not allow it to overtake them, as I did.... It is a process for me!

But if I was natural for 20 YEARS or 20 MINUTES, I have the courage of MY CONVICTIONS. I'm cool with being part of this evolving movement to dispel the myths and combat the NEGATIVE CONNOTATIONS of wearing naturally textured hair. So add me right in to the SISTA SOULJIA RELAXERREHAB!!!

Weak and insulting? Okay, it was just used in the sense of a metaphor. I don't know why you took it so deep and literal. I was trying to make a comparison. No one said the word is just as severe as the n-word. The only one who took it that far was YOU.

But whatever, obviously you don't get it so I choose not to try and waste my time making sure you do get it. You just go ahead and keep insulting people by basically saying they are a slave to a relaxer regardless of who they are and how much you DON'T know about them. But please don't get mad when a sista cut you up in a heart beat. You just can't take YOUR experiences and place it on everyone else. THAT'S weak and insulting and it shows that you can't grasp a level of understanding that everyone's experiences aren't the same as yours.

 

[PaperClip]

Weak and insulting? Okay, it was just used in the sense of a metaphor. I don't know why you took it so deep. I was trying to make a comparison. No one said the word is just as severe as the n-word. The only one who took it that far was YOU.

But whatever, obviously you don't get it so I chose not to try and waste my time making sure you do get it. You just go ahead and keep insulting people by basically saying they are a slave to a relaxer regardless of who they are and how much you DON'T know about them. But please don't get mad when a sista cut you up in a heart beat. You just can't take YOUR experiences and place it on everyone else. THAT'S weak and insulting and it shows that you can't grasp a level of understanding that everyone's experiences aren't the same as yours.

Wow....
No hostility here! It's Saturday morning and I finally had a decent night's sleep so I'm not trying to blow that high!

I am not sure what I "don't get" (that's ironic, huh!). I also don't know where I said that other people are a slave to the chemical. I did talk about my experience and I will continue to do so. I cannot place my experience or anything on anyone without their permission, so if my story strikes a chord with a person (of their own free will), then so be it. Your response here confirms that I must have a powerful gift of persuasion.... I had better use it for good and not evil.

I'll end here by saying that I am teachable. So as (you say) I don't understand, I'm willing to keep at it until I figure it out. As I stated before, when I first got to LCHF, I thought simply that relaxers were the devil. Today, a year and a half later, I know that's not true... so to me, that's progress!

Peace.

 

[BrownSkin2]

That's why it's called "creamy crack".
Everybody says I can quit whenever I want,
isn't that what all addicts say???
I'm only 5 months into my transition
and I really don't know if I can do it
but I'm gonna try my best to quit it.

lol...

 

[bocagirl]

Well reserve those words for YOU. Don't use it in conjunction to other women. I use the word ni@@a but I would never call a fellow sista that, even though I call myself that sometimes when joking. I know the negative connotation to it and i know everyone isn't cool with it.

Regardless of YOUR experiences, respect that other women don't like the word. Point blank. Just because you felt like YOU were a slave to it, does not give you the right to say the same for all women.

Well said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[hopeful]

I love being natural. It has been the absolute best thing for me and my hair. I blow-dried my hair last night and my goodness it looked like it did when I was a little girl, so thick and full, and finally hitting shoulder-length.

 

[PinkSkates]

Originally Posted by SouthernTease
That's why it's called "creamy crack".
Everybody says I can quit whenever I want,
isn't that what all addicts say???
I'm only 5 months into my transition
and I really don't know if I can do it
but I'm gonna try my best to quit it.

This is tooooo freakin' funny!!!

 

[SouthernTease]

So it looks like 95% of the people that took this poll
(myself included) want to go natural...
I wonder what's stopping us???
What what make a person want to do something that
deep inside, they know they really don't want to do?
Could it be an addiction?
Could you really stop whenever you wanted?
Are we so psychologically
dependent on a this habit-forming substance
we call a RELAXER that it is in fact an addiction???
I wonder if any research has been done
to link addiction and hair relaxers...
i mean... it is a chemical...
I'm not going through withdrawals or anything...
or maybe I am...
I dunno...
I never really thought of relaxers
as an addiction until I started reading the Hair Forums...
and the results of this poll just opened my eyes...
it's something profound to think about.
The excuses were in the line of...
if there was another way to do it...
like if there was another way to get high???
you would do it???
ok... now I'm being silly.

But if you think about it...
it's not just hair...
there is definitely is a psychology to
Black Women and their hair.

 

[audacity.]

That's why it's called "creamy crack".
Everybody says I can quit whenever I want,
isn't that what all addicts say???
I'm only 5 months into my transition
and I really don't know if I can do it
but I'm gonna try my best to quit it.

yes it IS creamy crack!!!!

i just had a breif conversation with another member who is currently tex'd and is in the process of transitioning back to natural.

i told her that i am on a 12 mos stretch and will decide what to do at the end and that i am leaning toward an underprocessed relaxer.

she told me basically to reconsider. as we all know hair w/o chemicals is healthier.

but it just keeps calling me!!!

i am 5-6 mos post to date and i WILL make it to 12 but after that...we'll see...

ETA: i don't think the term "creamy crack" is deragatory. i actually think it is kinda funny. i guess i don't take the whole relaxed vs. naturual debate that seriously. it is my hair and if i want to relax it bone straight until the day i die, then it is my perogative and quite frankly no one else's business. it's MY hair!! I am the one who has to deal with it and it doesn't make one woman LESS of a sista b/c she chooses to relax her hair and/or cannot figure out a painLESS way to stop (painless = no TWA, no BC, not dealing with 2 completely diff. textures, basically not risking or losing all of her progres). for me, it is not that easy to just flat out stop. but that's me and i have my reasons for it.

yes i am relaxed. and NO as long as i have something to say about it, neither one of my girls hair will EVER see a drop of relaxer! yeah, yeah, it'd be better if i could lead by example, but if i don't, i want them to ALWAYS make better decisions than me in EVERY aspect of their lives...

my bad. i got all off on a tangent and up on a soap box.

(i am climbing down now)

ciao!

 

[Mahalialee4]

that will NOT work for me. I couldn't go natural, my hair is too resistant.

Just curious> I have heard people say their hair is resistant to relaxers, but never heard of it being resistant to being natural. Or were you saying that it would be unmanageable for you? Thanks for reply.

 

[coconow2007]

Maybe some time soon but not ready just yet

 

[LadyPaniolo]

I'm natural right now... for the 3rd time!!! (Well, I was BORN natural, so I guess this is #4!)

Right now I'm at the point where I always broke down and relaxed my hair. My hair is really thick and it can be a handful to manage. I never knew HOW to take care of it, and a relaxer just made it easier to appear presentable.

It was easy to stop, each time. STAYING stopped, that's the hard part.

I don't think I'll go back to the relaxers, ever. I've learned a lot about how using ANY chemical for so long can impact one's health, and I just can't see doing it anymore. And I do want to be a good example to my kids of loving myself as I am.

Plus my hair is about 10x stronger now that I'm natural. Strands that used to just break clean off are now sturdy and stay strong.

BTW you don't HAVE to BC. You can transition in braids, with sew-ins, wigs or twistouts/braidouts. The BC really tested my resolve, but it's not for everyone. I got some seriously hateful comments from neighbors, and even DH made it clear he didn't like my hair that short. Now, less than a year later, he's like

 

[schipperchow1]

I've never been addicted to relaxing but have been tempted to try & have texlaxed, but didn't like the feel of my hair. I used to succumb to the temptation at the beginning of summer to minimize frizzing & poofiness. I acknowledge that the mainstream standard of beauty is straight hair. As a woman, I want to do what makes me feel beautiful. I love the strength, softness & shine that my natural hair has.

However, I understand how people prefer the relaxed look. The number of compliments, etc that I get when my hair is styled in a straightened look always far exceeds the positive comments when in a naturally curly style. They do try to clean it up & say you can do so much with your hair & that it always looks nice... but if I needed that constant external reinforcement I would probably just relax (not to say that that is why others relax. I know people relax for a number of reasons..I am only speaking for myself) because I am very active & don't have time to straighten.

 

[remnant]

I wish I could but I don't think I can right now. I most likely will in the future though =)

OT: aK46 you've made great progress I remembered your hair last year Wow!!!

 

[Hair Iam]

Hi NappyParadise...I know what you're saying is true maybe when I find a job that will be more acceptable I can be natural one day. My environment doesnt accept it. I work for someone who's made it clear that if we are to go natural we better press it. I dont see the point of being natural and just wearing a press

. Yes she's black too and I find that its our own people who are more critical of our hair. Which is so sad.

This is so sad.....I'm so sorry....I pray your employer comes to love herself enough to love others ..just the way the Lord made them.

 

[Hair Iam]

I vote YES. I see PinkSkates and how she rocks her BSL natural hair all flowin' and bouncy and I think "If she can do it without the creamy crack, then why can't I?"

I miss my natural hair being down my back when I was a child. I want that back. I am currently 20 weeks post and I am learning to deal with my hair now. I am wondering how long I can go before I need a hit.

Honestly, I am hoping that I won't have to go back at all.

Ya'll pray for me.

..erplexed

I just did.Amen

 

[Hair Iam]

Briefly, a couple of things:

--the comparison of the n-word to "creamy crack" is weak and insulting. The n-word takes things to an entirely different level.

--I do respect that other women don't like the word and I'll even at admit that when I first started all of this, I was a bit "militant" about it (my screen name IS RelaxerRehab) and my time here at LCHF has softened that stance as I have observed how some people can handle the chemical and not allow it to overtake them, as I did.... It is a process for me!

But if I was natural for 20 YEARS or 20 MINUTES, I have the courage of MY CONVICTIONS. I'm cool with being part of this evolving movement to dispel the myths and combat the NEGATIVE CONNOTATIONS of wearing naturally textured hair. So add me right in to the SISTA SOULJIA RELAXERREHAB!!!

:Crowned: What she said!

 

[Nikki253]

So it looks like 95% of the people that took this poll
(myself included) want to go natural...
I wonder what's stopping us???
What what make a person want to do something that
deep inside, they know they really don't want to do?
Could it be an addiction?
Could you really stop whenever you wanted?
Are we so psychologically
dependent on a this habit-forming substance
we call a RELAXER that it is in fact an addiction???
I wonder if any research has been done
to link addiction and hair relaxers...
i mean... it is a chemical...
I'm not going through withdrawals or anything...
or maybe I am...
I dunno...
I never really thought of relaxers
as an addiction until I started reading the Hair Forums...
and the results of this poll just opened my eyes...
it's something profound to think about.
The excuses were in the line of...
if there was another way to do it...
like if there was another way to get high???
you would do it???
ok... now I'm being silly.

But if you think about it...
it's not just hair...
there is definitely is a psychology to
Black Women and their hair.

well said

 

[Hair Iam]

lol...

This POST is Hilarious LOL LOL

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

I wonder what's stopping everyone from going natural that feels like relaxer is crack and admit that THEY have an addiction, why not just do the BC and relieve yourself?

 

[LocksOfLuV]

I wonder what's stopping everyone from going natural that feels like relaxer is crack and admit that THEY have an addiction, why not just do the BC and relieve yourself?

Because I believe deep down some (not all) REALLY don't want to do it. Saying, "I love my natural hair and I want to be natural soooo bad" is the PC thing to say around here. It's basically a way to state how much they love their 'blackness' for some.

It's okay to say that you like being relaxed. No one will look down on you (here).

I just don't understand. If I want something "really" bad I am going ot get it at all costs. ALL costs. But maybe that's just me.

 

[audacity.]

Because I believe deep down some (not all) REALLY don't want to do it. Saying, "I love my natural hair and I want to be natural soooo bad" is the PC thing to say around here. It's basically a way to state how much they love their 'blackness' for some.

It's okay to say that you like being relaxed. No one will look down on you (here).

I just don't understand. If I want something "really" bad I am going ot get it at all costs. ALL costs. But maybe that's just me.

That is so very true. ^^^^ I think the bottom line is what works for some doesn't work for others. And to me, that's OK.

It is nice, though, for those of us REALLY putting for the effort to transition, to know that we do have not only support, but ENCOURAGEMENT to do it.

When you have been relaxed for most of your life and then trying to go natural, it is not the easiest thing to do. You don't know your texture or even how to care for your hair for that matter.

I think the "addicting" thing about relaxing is not so much putting the cream in your hair, but the results that one obtains afterward (styling ease, sleek smooth looks w/o using much heat, not worring about humiditiy or sweating as much, etc...)

Whether one admits it or not, relaxed hair is EASIER to take care of. Why deal with all the challenges of natural hair care if you don't have to? IDK, just playing a little devil's advocate...

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

Yeah girl, you aint never lied about that.

Because I believe deep down some (not all) REALLY don't want to do it. Saying, "I love my natural hair and I want to be natural soooo bad" is the PC thing to say around here. It's basically a way to state how much they love their 'blackness' for some.

It's okay to say that you like being relaxed. No one will look down on you (here).

I just don't understand. If I want something "really" bad I am going ot get it at all costs. ALL costs. But maybe that's just me.

 

[LocksOfLuV]

That is so very true. ^^^^ I think the bottom line is what works for some doesn't work for others. And to me, that's OK.

It is nice, though, for those of us REALLY putting for the effort to transition, to know that we do have not only support, but ENCOURAGEMENT to do it.

When you have been relaxed for most of your life and then trying to go natural, it is not the easiest thing to do. You don't know your texture or even how to care for your hair for that matter.

I think the "addicting" thing about relaxing is not so much putting the cream in your hair, but the results that one obtains afterward (styling ease, sleek smooth looks w/o using much heat, not worring about humiditiy or sweating as much, etc...)

Whether one admits it or not, relaxed hair is EASIER to take care of. Why deal with all the challenges of natural hair care if you don't have to? IDK, just playing a little devil's advocate...

I agree with it. Thinking about going natural for me is a scary thing to be honest. Not just knowing and/or refiguring(if that is a word) out what my hair likes, but a mental transition as well. I am just not interested in what *I* think will come out of it (on all levels). I will wait until I am more settled in life and have the mental capacity to deal with other things.

But when I see people praising their natural hair and saying how BAD they want to go natural I can't help anything but think, "why not?" It's not like it's gonna cost you a trillion dollars or your first born. But then again I am a go-getter. If I want something I will get it.

 

[Cheleigh]

Because I believe deep down some (not all) REALLY don't want to do it. Saying, "I love my natural hair and I want to be natural soooo bad" is the PC thing to say around here. It's basically a way to state how much they love their 'blackness' for some.

It's okay to say that you like being relaxed. No one will look down on you (here).

I just don't understand. If I want something "really" bad I am going ot get it at all costs. ALL costs. But maybe that's just me.

I think that what "some" people mean is that they love the "idea" of going natural. They love the thought of having bra-strap or waist-length, tangle and knot free curly hair that cascades down their back and has 20% shrinkage. They love the thought of being able to be curly one day, and straight the next.

I think that most people love the idea of being able to say "oh, this is long, beautiful hair is my natural texture--I just wash and go."

In short, some folks love the idea of what being a natural could represent--not the reality of what being a natural often is. That's JMO.

 

[SouthernTease]

Hmmm...
maybe we're just addicted to straight hair
even White women flat iron their hair
everyday just to get that bone straight look...
maybe we need a REVOLUTION though ...
a curly hair revolution or something...
remember the 80s????...
maybe we can bring frizzy back.

JUST A THOUGHT.

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

I remember the 70's, and when I walk into my aunt's home that's one of the first things you see, her in her graduation cap with a big A$$ fro, it was soo nicely shaped too, and until this day she's still a natural.

I don't really thing natural hair went anywhere, it's just seems to be really popular or the thing to do in the hair world.

So when's the BC? please post pics.

Hmmm...
maybe we're just addicted to straight hair
even White women flat iron their hair
everyday just to get that bone straight look...
maybe we need a REVOLUTION though ...
a curly hair revolution or something...
remember the 80s????...
maybe we can bring frizzy back.

JUST A THOUGHT.

 

[SouthernTease]

Oh... I'm not doing THE BIG CHOP!!!
I've learned to manage my natural
and relaxed hair without having to
chop it all off. I'm just going to let
it "do what it do" naturally... either
way... I'm not even gonna put a pair
of scissors in sight of my hair until APRIL 2008.

 

[hopeful]

I agree with it. Thinking about going natural for me is a scary thing to be honest. Not just knowing and/or refiguring(if that is a word) out what my hair likes, but a mental transition as well. I am just not interested in what *I* think will come out of it (on all levels). I will wait until I am more settled in life and have the mental capacity to deal with other things.

But when I see people praising their natural hair and saying how BAD they want to go natural I can't help anything but think, "why not?" It's not like it's gonna cost you a trillion dollars or your first born. But then again I am a go-getter. If I want something I will get it.

Your comments struck a chord with me. I really appreciate your honesty. You are a deep thinker LocksOfLUv, I never really thought about the idea of people saying they really want to be natural just to be pc or because it sounds good. I'm sure this is not the case for everyone but I'm sure it certainly covers some people. Sometimes I think people really are just in conflict, you know their heart wants one thing and their mind wants another, or something like that. I've discovered that life gets easier (for me anyway) when my heart and my head are in allignment, when my actions match my words, etc. I admire those of you who strongly say I love being relaxed. I admire those who say I adore natural hair. In the end we are all on a very interesting journey.

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Your comments struck a chord with me. I really appreciate your honesty. You are a deep thinker LocksOfLUv, I never really thought about the idea of people saying they really want to be natural just to be pc or because it sounds good. I'm sure this is not the case for everyone but I'm sure it certainly covers some people. Sometimes I think people really are just in conflict, you know their heart wants one thing and their mind wants another, or something like that. I've discovered that life gets easier (for me anyway) when my heart and my head are in allignment, when my actions match my words, etc. I admire those of you who strongly say I love being relaxed. I admire those who say I adore natural hair. In the end we are all on a very interesting journey.

Perfectly stated! Perfect.

 

[PinkPeony]

I'd love to be natural one day.
Why am I not doing it?
honestly I think it would be to time consuming for me to detangle and all that plus I LOOOVE long hair on me.
So unless I find a way to transition without loosing any length... heck not even then.
Honestly I'am scared I won't like my natural hair,not the texture but the shrinkage and all that .
I also cringe every time I read a thread off a natural complaining about their hair,I'am sooo not ready for this.