i do disagree with sutton989, but i also do think that people have the right to state opinions . its doesn't mean that i agree with her but i do show RESPECT for what other people have to say. i don't think she was trying to attack us personally. i think its very childish to get mad when someone has a different opinions that you.
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Why do Black Women want long hair???
- Thread starter sutton989
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adrienne0914
Well-Known Member
i agree with divacurl! i don't know how her asking a question made her a troll. i could see if she came back and attacked people's responses. she didn't. she is not disturbing the peace...
we don't have to agree with everything that's said here. why can't we state our disagreement without calling names or jumping on folks?
we don't have to agree with everything that's said here. why can't we state our disagreement without calling names or jumping on folks?
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Serei said:
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I just thought that is was getting to heated in here. She only asked a ?
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When people come to the board to ask questions like that they usually do it to get a rise out of folks. That spells troll in my book.
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Exactly. And if the person is a real member, I apologize, but I smelled something funny in the way the question was presented
Sorry, Sutton.
Serei said:
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I just thought that is was getting to heated in here. She only asked a ?
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When people come to the board to ask questions like that they usually do it to get a rise out of folks. That spells troll in my book.
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Exactly. And if the person is a real member, I apologize, but I smelled something funny in the way the question was presented
Sorry, Sutton.
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i agree with divacurl! i don't know how her asking a question made her a troll. i could see if she came back and attacked people's responses. she didn't. she is not disturbing the peace...
we don't have to agree with everything that's said here. why can't we state our disagreement without calling names or jumping on folks?
[/ QUOTE ]
No disrespect. It's just that it's weird of a newbie to come off of the street to a hair growing board and ask that. If an established member asked, I would write it off as casual conversation or innocent curiosity. It has happened too often in the past. As one of the last peaceful hair boards on the web, we have become a target. I've grown to not trust newbies. I didn't mean to offend sutton, that is, if she had good intentions in posting her question.
i agree with divacurl! i don't know how her asking a question made her a troll. i could see if she came back and attacked people's responses. she didn't. she is not disturbing the peace...
we don't have to agree with everything that's said here. why can't we state our disagreement without calling names or jumping on folks?
[/ QUOTE ]
No disrespect. It's just that it's weird of a newbie to come off of the street to a hair growing board and ask that. If an established member asked, I would write it off as casual conversation or innocent curiosity. It has happened too often in the past. As one of the last peaceful hair boards on the web, we have become a target. I've grown to not trust newbies. I didn't mean to offend sutton, that is, if she had good intentions in posting her question.
pebbles
New Member
I think we have to expect these sorts of questions from newbies, more so than from old members. They haven't been here and may not be aware that we've had these conversations in the past and how they went down. I think that's why every now and then, we see these same subjects come up and always from new members.
adrienne0914
Well-Known Member
[ QUOTE ]
pebbles said:
I think we have to expect these sorts of questions from newbies, more so than from old members. They haven't been here and may not be aware that we've had these conversations in the past and how they went down. I think that's why every now and then, we see these same subjects come up and always from new members.
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EXACTLY, pebbles!! and yall also have to remember that to a certain extent, newbies still have the mindset of everyone around them. it takes a while of being here and seeing the success stories before someone starts to believe they can have as much hair as they want. hell, i was almost at bra strap before i believed it!!
pebbles said:
I think we have to expect these sorts of questions from newbies, more so than from old members. They haven't been here and may not be aware that we've had these conversations in the past and how they went down. I think that's why every now and then, we see these same subjects come up and always from new members.
[/ QUOTE ]
EXACTLY, pebbles!! and yall also have to remember that to a certain extent, newbies still have the mindset of everyone around them. it takes a while of being here and seeing the success stories before someone starts to believe they can have as much hair as they want. hell, i was almost at bra strap before i believed it!!
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Serei said:
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i agree with divacurl! i don't know how her asking a question made her a troll. i could see if she came back and attacked people's responses. she didn't. she is not disturbing the peace...
we don't have to agree with everything that's said here. why can't we state our disagreement without calling names or jumping on folks?
[/ QUOTE ]
No disrespect. It's just that it's weird of a newbie to come off of the street to a hair growing board and ask that. If an established member asked, I would write it off as casual conversation or innocent curiosity. It has happened too often in the past. As one of the last peaceful hair boards on the web, we have become a target. I've grown to not trust newbies. I didn't mean to offend sutton, that is, if she had good intentions in posting her question.
[/ QUOTE ]
That's funny, because I belong to another board (non-hair related), and we have had so many problems in the past with trolls and imposters, that we decided not to even talk to newbies! LOL!
However, since the problems have gone away, we have made some new friends once the newbies stuck around, engaged in conversation like a person with a brain, and they have been embraced as well.
It's just hard to trust new people at boards, when you're so ACCUSTOMED to being harassed!
Serei said:
[ QUOTE ]
i agree with divacurl! i don't know how her asking a question made her a troll. i could see if she came back and attacked people's responses. she didn't. she is not disturbing the peace...
we don't have to agree with everything that's said here. why can't we state our disagreement without calling names or jumping on folks?
[/ QUOTE ]
No disrespect. It's just that it's weird of a newbie to come off of the street to a hair growing board and ask that. If an established member asked, I would write it off as casual conversation or innocent curiosity. It has happened too often in the past. As one of the last peaceful hair boards on the web, we have become a target. I've grown to not trust newbies. I didn't mean to offend sutton, that is, if she had good intentions in posting her question.
[/ QUOTE ]
That's funny, because I belong to another board (non-hair related), and we have had so many problems in the past with trolls and imposters, that we decided not to even talk to newbies! LOL!
However, since the problems have gone away, we have made some new friends once the newbies stuck around, engaged in conversation like a person with a brain, and they have been embraced as well.
It's just hard to trust new people at boards, when you're so ACCUSTOMED to being harassed!
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divacurl said:
i just became a member of this site today. if i post a a topic that some people don't agree with am i going to get attacked too?? treat people like you would want to be treated.
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Perhaps you can do me a favor and re-read her post. Thanks.
divacurl said:
i just became a member of this site today. if i post a a topic that some people don't agree with am i going to get attacked too?? treat people like you would want to be treated.
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Perhaps you can do me a favor and re-read her post. Thanks.
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pebbles said:
I think we have to expect these sorts of questions from newbies, more so than from old members. They haven't been here and may not be aware that we've had these conversations in the past and how they went down. I think that's why every now and then, we see these same subjects come up and always from new members.
[/ QUOTE ]
If the person is not interested IN long hair, why are they even here?
I'm done with it.
pebbles said:
I think we have to expect these sorts of questions from newbies, more so than from old members. They haven't been here and may not be aware that we've had these conversations in the past and how they went down. I think that's why every now and then, we see these same subjects come up and always from new members.
[/ QUOTE ]
If the person is not interested IN long hair, why are they even here?
I'm done with it.
brittanynic16
Well-Known Member
I think you ladies are correct. Even, though I did post anything, I kind of took it personally, being that I want to grow long hair. I know perhaps sutton did not mean to offend but when you come to a place and tell everyone that we are not happy with ourselves you are most defiantly get a rise out of people. She said that she was not trying to offend however the goal of many women here was put down. I felt the statement was very racist (not saying she is). Because we are black we are not allowed to want long hair. I go to Howard University, a historically black university, and we analyze these types of issues all the time and this is another stereotype. Many people say that African Americans are stupid too. Does that mean we should just be happy with the knowledge we have and not try to persue a further education because that would be trying to be white. Think about it? I just believe that the question could have been better stated if such a reaction was not wanted.
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brittanynic16 said:
I think you ladies are correct. Even, though I did post anything, I kind of took it personally, being that I want to grow long hair. I know perhaps sutton did not mean to offend but when you come to a place and tell everyone that we are not happy with ourselves you are most defiantly get a rise out of people. She said that she was not trying to offend however the goal of many women here was put down. I felt the statement was very racist (not saying she is). Because we are black we are not allowed to want long hair. I go to Howard University, a historically black university, and we analyze these types of issues all the time and this is another stereotype. Many people say that African Americans are stupid too. Does that mean we should just be happy with the knowledge we have and not try to persue a further education because that would be trying to be white. Think about it? I just believe that the question could have been better stated if such a reaction was not wanted.
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AMEN!
Allowed, huh? InCREdible!
brittanynic16 said:
I think you ladies are correct. Even, though I did post anything, I kind of took it personally, being that I want to grow long hair. I know perhaps sutton did not mean to offend but when you come to a place and tell everyone that we are not happy with ourselves you are most defiantly get a rise out of people. She said that she was not trying to offend however the goal of many women here was put down. I felt the statement was very racist (not saying she is). Because we are black we are not allowed to want long hair. I go to Howard University, a historically black university, and we analyze these types of issues all the time and this is another stereotype. Many people say that African Americans are stupid too. Does that mean we should just be happy with the knowledge we have and not try to persue a further education because that would be trying to be white. Think about it? I just believe that the question could have been better stated if such a reaction was not wanted.
[/ QUOTE ]
AMEN!
Allowed, huh? InCREdible!
HotCoCoGurl130
New Member
What a topic. I hope she does come back.We have so much info to share.
CrownnGlori
New Member
Yikes!
1. I really do appreciate this board.
2. To have your seniors come right out and say they don't trust you stings.
3. Possibly if it was a negative person they would have kept arguing. If they were genuine they could be crying at their key board.
4. I already had plenty o' hair I just love talking about it.
5. From an outsiders view it does seem a bit much to be taking large doses of vitamins, carrot juice by the gallons and standing on your head for 20 mins a day. Baggies and wet heads in wintertime might seem extreme.
But with knowledge comes understanding.
1. I really do appreciate this board.
2. To have your seniors come right out and say they don't trust you stings.
3. Possibly if it was a negative person they would have kept arguing. If they were genuine they could be crying at their key board.
4. I already had plenty o' hair I just love talking about it.
5. From an outsiders view it does seem a bit much to be taking large doses of vitamins, carrot juice by the gallons and standing on your head for 20 mins a day. Baggies and wet heads in wintertime might seem extreme.
But with knowledge comes understanding.
soulchild
New Member
[ QUOTE ]
CrownnGlori said:
and standing on your head for 20 mins a day.
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Now who does this?? Go ahead and call them out..
I'm Just playing yall
I sincerely hope that you haven't taken offense to all of our responses Sutton, but I hope you understand where we're coming from.
CrownnGlori said:
and standing on your head for 20 mins a day.
[/ QUOTE ]
Now who does this?? Go ahead and call them out..
I'm Just playing yall
I sincerely hope that you haven't taken offense to all of our responses Sutton, but I hope you understand where we're coming from.
brittanynic16
Well-Known Member
Well crown if you (not you personally, but in general) do not have a passion for hair like many of the women here do, you my not understand the things they do. It is like my sister. She is totally in love with shoes. She must have a new part every week and she reads all the fashion magazines that she can get her hands on. I do not understand her love for them but that is because I do not have the same passion that she does. But, my aunt has the same feelings as she does and she can relate. Now don't get me wrong, I love some shoes but i don't have the passion they do. So, if it is not totally your thing you may no be able to relate all these crazy ideas.
Sutton989, I hear what you're saying, but I also hear what you're not saying. I believe you come to this board for the same reason as the rest of us. To get information on growing and having healthy hair. Don't get all twisted up in the stereotypes. This is a fun, laid-back, stress-free forum. We come here to "Exhale", to share, to bond, to have comraderie with each other. You should embrace this, instead of trying to find something demeaning about it. Don't let other peoples hair success "Bug" you -it's just not that serious. Every "outrageous combination" and "different vitamins" are what we call a Regimen. Anyone here would be more than happy to help you with any hair problem(s) that you may be experiencing. Whether you want to grow your hair, cut your hair, relax your hair, condition your hair, dye, press, etc., etc., etc., we all have your back. Now does any of this sound like self-hatred? This sounds like self-love to me. When I care for my hair with this kind of love, it just happens to grow so it's a win - win situation. As far as selling-out, no one should have the power to make you feel like something you're not.
CrownnGlori
New Member
Its not that I cant relate but someone on the outside might not be able to. We have to be empathtic.
Soulchild - I ain't saying no names but some of those yoga positions have you looking at the world upside down for a few minutes.
Soulchild - I ain't saying no names but some of those yoga positions have you looking at the world upside down for a few minutes.
Aerie17
New Member
I am skipping to my response without reading all the others, so I hope I am not repeating or boring the socks off someone...
I have never felt I was emulating white women when my hair was long. I have not felt "blacker" when my hair was short. I have always worn my hair the way I felt was attractive, whether that was long and flowing or in an afro, braids or...short and stick straight. I have worn it all and surprisingly, I have never considered whether my hair made me "more black," or "more white". That may seem impossible, since the subject of hair among blacks, has always been a political thing just like skin color...you got "bad hair, girl" or, I bet she thinks, she's white just cause she's got "good hair." Or, "if you black, get back; if you brown, stick around, if you yella, catch a fella."
I mean, when oh when, can we just let each other be...whatever that is, whatever that means to each individual? Black women comprise every possible skin color and hair texture and are truly the most beautiful creatures on earth, and we should revel in it. We can fry, dye and lay it to the side. We can wash and wear...we can wear somebody else's! And, darn if we don't look goooood, doin' it!
My ultimate question is this one: If you are bothered that most of the women on the "LONG HAIR CARE FORUM"
want long hair, why are you here? I ask it in love,
because I want to know and by no means am I shooing you away. Possibly the very best thing about this board is the tolerance we have for everyone, whether they be nappy, straight or anything in between. The atmosphere on this board has me visiting it nearly every day...and that is rare for me. My experience with other "black" boards, whether they be about beauty, hair or of general-interest is they generally deteriorate into name-calling, or totally inappropriate sexual discussions, or race-baiting or ..you name it; and the profanity is downright insulting to any clear-thinking individual who can express herself using plain, clean language.
sutton989, I say welcome to you and thanks for opening the door to another lively discussion! Bottom line: we want long, healthy hair because we want it. Why not?
One more teeny weeny thing??? Who said long hair = straight, white-folks hair???
Have you seen the number of posts about folks who are transitioning out of relaxers, back to their own natural God-given textures?
I have never felt I was emulating white women when my hair was long. I have not felt "blacker" when my hair was short. I have always worn my hair the way I felt was attractive, whether that was long and flowing or in an afro, braids or...short and stick straight. I have worn it all and surprisingly, I have never considered whether my hair made me "more black," or "more white". That may seem impossible, since the subject of hair among blacks, has always been a political thing just like skin color...you got "bad hair, girl" or, I bet she thinks, she's white just cause she's got "good hair." Or, "if you black, get back; if you brown, stick around, if you yella, catch a fella."
I mean, when oh when, can we just let each other be...whatever that is, whatever that means to each individual? Black women comprise every possible skin color and hair texture and are truly the most beautiful creatures on earth, and we should revel in it. We can fry, dye and lay it to the side. We can wash and wear...we can wear somebody else's! And, darn if we don't look goooood, doin' it!
My ultimate question is this one: If you are bothered that most of the women on the "LONG HAIR CARE FORUM"
sutton989, I say welcome to you and thanks for opening the door to another lively discussion! Bottom line: we want long, healthy hair because we want it. Why not?
One more teeny weeny thing??? Who said long hair = straight, white-folks hair???
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