What does your pastor teach on DIVORCE???

[gradygirl]

Great thread ladies. Your comments have been very thought provoking.

 

[Nice & Wavy]

While I do believe that divorce should be the last resort, I can't help but to wonder why God would condemn the innocent spouse to hell for divorcing (except for reasons of adultery and "un-believer").

So I would be given an automatic one-way ticket to Hell if:

1. My husband ups and decides that he doesn't want to be married anymore. He believes in God, but not our marriage. No he didn't cheat, but he doesn't want to be with me anymore. So because we didn't divorce due to cheating or unbelieving, we're both going to Hell.

2. My husband still believes in God, but he gave me 2 black eyes, broke my arms, fractured my ribs, and kicked me in the stomach which caused me to have a miscarriage...we divorce...we're both going to Hell for that?

3. I just found out that my husband is a drug dealer and is putting our family in danger. He refuses to change his lifestyle. I divorce him. I guess I'll be going to Hell for that too, huh?

4. My husband has a serious gambling problem, and he won't stop. I've tried for years getting him help and going to counseling, but he doesn't want to change. I'm about to get evicted and my children have no food. I divorce him. Am I still going to Hell?

Throughout all of these various scenarios, I can't believe I'd be punished for divorcing. God is supposed to know our hearts, right? But I guess our hearts don't matter; adultery and unbelieving is the only way to get divorced....so what if he just doesn't love me, gives me a black eye, deals drugs, and is about to get us put out on the street .

In the end, I know God has set rules, but I honestly don't think that He's just that narrow-minded. I mean, c'mon now, he IS God ya know?

Hey girl,

When I read your post, all I could think about was King David. Man, he messed up big time huh? Yeah, he paid a price for what he did, but God called him "A Man after God's Own Heart."

God does hate divorce. It wasn't in His original plan for man. And you know what, there are other things that WE do that's was not in His original plan for us either, yet we do them everyday.

I am not perfect...I make plenty mistakes. Yet, I always know that God's love for me will stand because He is a forgiving God.

I see God using many people who have had divorce for whatever reason. He uses them mightly too...and I know its God because only God can give results like that. But, whatever they have done, that's between Him and them. I'm just trying to keep myself before Him, because He is a Holy God. I don't have time to be plucking people's eyes out because of what they do, yet, I'm not judging those that do, just making my statement just like e'rbody else

I appreciate your post...makes one think. You drew up some pretty serious scenarios....hmmmm....!

 

[Nice & Wavy]

I hate divorce; I do not advocate divorce and neither do I encourage it. I would give all that I could to see a marriage work, than to see it fail. Frankly, I'm tired of broken families and marriages. I'm tired of it!

My Pastor makes it plain, stop your whining and make it work!

However there are exceptions:

On the subject of abuse, the Bible doesn't have to address this verbatim, as it speaks for itsself...it is violence and this is constructive abandonment. For the abuser has 'constructively' made it impossible for the spouse to live in harmony and most important, in safety.

God does not want violence in any relationship; it's defeating the entire purpose of marriage, love and God's plan for life. We are commisioned to love one another and abuse is not love, its satanic and destructive to the spirit, soul and body. God says we are to embrace one another not hit nor speak harshly to wound ones' spirit or soul.

In I Peter 3, the word admonishes husbands to dwell with their wives according to knowledge. Proverbs, Husbands treat your wives as the loving hind; be satisfied at her breasts at all times (caress/nurture her); husbands, love your wives.

My point, no one is going to hell for leaving and divorcing an abuser. And I do not believe that a woman or man would be held accountable in sin, if they remarried. I'd get on my face before God and ask His permission and to have His grace upon me for remarriage and I'd also dedicate my new marriage to Him to keep as the apple of His eye. To God be the glory for a second chance to love and marry.

On adultery, it's case by case and between the individual and God. For now, I don't want to expound upon it. Yet, I do not believe that a divorced person should be condemned if they did remarry. It depends on why they did it and upon their heart towards God.

I can't say what occurred in one's marriage to lead to a divorce which resulted from adultery. Here's the thing, many have had sexual relationships outside of marriage, which begat children, yet have married other than the parent of the children. My point, is that there are so many scenerios and reasons; I can only allow God to be judge and be at His mercy.

Shimmie...you my hero!