What do YOU think happened here??

SexySin985

Well-Known Member
Ladies what is your take on this situation????

You and your boyfriend are at work together arguing about something that just happened. He makes a comment that he has been calling your phone phone and left messages (4 times) but you got absolutely no phone calls or vocemails. So you ask him to prove it and he pulls out his phone to show you his call log. In doing that not only did you NOT see the calls he 'supposedly' placed to your phone BUT you see a name of a woman(among many other calls) that you realize. This name and number is the same name and number that you saw as an incoming call on his phone while you two were out to dinner a few months back. He didnt answer the call then and he claimed that he doesn't know who this woman/person is but they just keep calling.

So you now just happened to see that name and number again and you question him about it. Right away he starts getting defensive and trying to walk away all while saying he doesn't know who this person is. His reason for walking away was because people could be listening and you were being to loud so when asked to go somewhere secluded to talk about it he didn't want to:ohwell:

So you continue asking why is this person calling you at 1 something in the morning. He claims he never answered the phone and he just let it ring. :perplexed So you tell him to call the number back. He doesn't want to. You ask him why and he says he doesn't want to call a number he does not know and it was to late at night (by this time it was 2 something and the person called him around 1 something). You keep telling him to call the number back in front of you and he doesn't want to. He then says he will call in the morning..... You tell him NO call it nowand keeps saying he will call in the morning. :perplexed You tell him to let you hold his phone he says no but can't come up with a reason why.:perplexed:perplexed So with his not wanting to call plus his defensive behavior you know right away something is not right. So he storms off cuz he is upset you don't believe a word he's saying.

About 10 mins later he comes back saying if this is so important to you he will call the number. So you tell him that you want to hold the phone and call the number and that becomes another issue. After much arguing you finally are able to get the phone. You walk away to use the phone and he is following you trying to see what you are going to do. So you look at the phone and the entire call log has been DELEATED:nono:. Not one call from the long list of calls you first seen earlier. :look: So you look in the contact list and see the same name and number of the woman/person in question. Who saves a number of someone they don't know?? You call the number and it goes to an automated voicemail:ohwell:

You come back to him and ask him why did he erase his call history and why does he have this number saved if it is someone you don't know?? He claims he just erased his call history cuz he wanted to and the number is in his contacts because he wanted to have it saved to call it for you:look:

What do you ladies think?
 
At the very least, he's doing something that he has no business because he's going through too much to try to hide it. At this point, you have the decision to walk away or ignore it, act like it never happened and don't mention it again. #kanyeshrug

Question: How long have you been together and have you seen any other "signs" OR do you have a reason to distrust him?
 
This screams suspicious to me ...

... but listen to YOUR woman's intuition and what it's telling you.
 
Seriously?!!?? You have to ask?!!?? Come on. You know what's up. Don't you?

As stated above, you have two choices - put up with it or leave. It's your choice.
 
He's cheating. Next.

LOL, straight to the point huh, :lol:

At the very least, he's doing something that he has no business because he's going through too much to try to hide it. At this point, you have the decision to walk away or ignore it, act like it never happened and don't mention it again. #kanyeshrug

Question: How long have you been together and have you seen any other "signs" OR do you have a reason to distrust him?

We've been together for 2 years and some months..... Honestly he has cheated once before in our relationship. I know, i know i know :-(

What you said is exactly how I feel. He is doing way to much and he must hiding something....
 
I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. If my SO was acting up like that this place would be a crime scene. Only you can decide what you will live with. :nono:
 
Thaknx ladies..... I truly appreciate all your responses:drunk:

I guess it does seem pretty obvious what the deal is:ohwell: I guess I just need to hear it from someone else...

The thing is I let what I thought was going on get the best of me at times and turned out to be wrong.....
Like I told him he may not be sleeping with anyone but at the very least he must be hiding something... Why else would you purposely delete the call history and put me through hell and follow me around when I ask to hold your phone.....

I told him I could explain this same situation to anyone else and they would see why i'm upset...He tries hard to convince me that I'm the one that's crazy.. That's what I constantly get called when I come to him about anything he's doin...
 
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Sorry you're going through this. Do you want to keep putting up with his behavior?

I honestly am tired of it.... Its like he doesn't understand or take seriously anything I say UNTIL I tell him I'm going to show him how it feels. Then thats when it really gets crazy.

I told him that when he starts seeing strange calls from guys on my hone at all hours of the dany and night and he questions me about it and all I have to offer him is a "I don't know who that is" then he better not say a word about it. And that when all hell broke loose cuz I disrespected him by saying that. Now obviously I'm not serious about having guys calling me but he doesn't get things until the shoe is on the other foot and I am tired of it.
 
Sorry OP but he is definitely cheating and he is messy with it as well. Maybe he wants to get caught...

Typical cheater to turn the situation around and make it seem like you are wrong, crazy, or the one who is up to something. I've been on both sides of the coin. Hope you are able to move on, work it out or whatever outcome you want.
 
Question is dos it matter if he's cheating on you?

He did it before and you two are still together so what exactly is the problem

and that whole gimme your phone mess is uncessary and juvenile. You know the deal, no need for the ghetto antic sof gimmie your phone, lemme hold your phone, who's calling you, etc

so many better things could be done with your time.
 
Question is dos it matter if he's cheating on you?

He did it before and you two are still together so what exactly is the problem

and that whole gimme your phone mess is uncessary and juvenile. You know the deal, no need for the ghetto antic sof gimmie your phone, lemme hold your phone, who's calling you, etc

so many better things could be done with your time.

Of course it matters and he's knows it:yep:

He is not the first guy to have cheated on me. If I am with someone and they cheat or if I have the slightest feeling they are cheating I'm out. I don't even sit around and wait for an explanation. In all my years of dating I have never taken back a cheater but with him I did it different:ohwell: He knows how much it took for me to take him back and swore up and down it would never happen again. So he knows this is it.

And you are right, I did stoop to a childish level and I know thats where I went wrong. :ohwell::ohwell:
 
I honestly am tired of it.... Its like he doesn't understand or take seriously anything I say UNTIL I tell him I'm going to show him how it feels. Then thats when it really gets crazy.

I told him that when he starts seeing strange calls from guys on my hone at all hours of the dany and night and he questions me about it and all I have to offer him is a "I don't know who that is" then he better not say a word about it. And that when all hell broke loose cuz I disrespected him by saying that. Now obviously I'm not serious about having guys calling me but he doesn't get things until the shoe is on the other foot and I am tired of it.

If you're fed up with his behavior, then you have to make a decision and leave. Why threaten him with cheating? You will never make him see things the way you see them. Why does he have to experience it, for him to know it's wrong and it doesn't feel good when done to him? C'mon OP, you have to love yourself and respect yourself enough to say: "I will not tolerate this behavior from anybody and walk away. It doesn't matter what you say to him, he won't stop doing it because he knows you tolerate his BS.
 
^^^ Why put yourself through that? Why stoop to that level? I mean the writing is on the wall. If he had nothing to hide, he would not have acted the way he did. No need to call the other woman. And if you do call, what are you going to say to her? :nono:
 
He's cheating.

Most cheaters will turn the situation on you to diffuse attention towards themselves. They want you to feel insecure, needy and crazy so that you'll depend on them. You aren't someone's cum bucket or stepping board. You need to love yourself more and to SHOW him that, you need to walk away b/c you can do better. There are plenty of wonderful men walking around who are attractive, smart, wealthy and will treat you right. He does it b/c he knows you'll take it.
 
^^^ Why put yourself through that? Why stoop to that level? I mean the writing is on the wall. If he had nothing to hide, he would not have acted the way he did. No need to call the other woman. And if you do call, what are you going to say to her? :nono:

I agree. Do NOT call that number. You may not even get the truth, and even worse, you may cussed the hell out.

If he's cheating, that's something you need to take up with him and him alone.
 
^^^ Why put yourself through that? Why stoop to that level? I mean the writing is on the wall. If he had nothing to hide, he would not have acted the way he did. No need to call the other woman. And if you do call, what are you going to say to her? :nono:

I don't want to call the woman. I wanted him to do it but for whatever reason :)ohwell:) he didnt want to. At this point I still don't even plan on calling her. His behavior showed me what I need to see so at this point calling the number is unnecessary.
 
Hi there,
I've been in that situation before and if there's one thing I can tell you is:

Ask yourself: You made an exception for him to take him back...now to what extent will he push his luck? Also, is it worth it to let someone's foolishness affect you and risk that in the long run you might LOSE it and carry baggage for future years to come?? Are you ready to risk that?

You already know the answer.
Staying can't be easy...and leaving IS more harder sometimes...
Wish you the best of luck and a big hug.
 
You're going to have to leave him for good. Any dude who cared about you and wasn't cheating would have not played the games he's playing. Don't let him toy with your health and/or well-being. You can do better. And being alone is better than having constant heartache. I'm really sorry you are going through this.
 
LOSER!!!! and on to the next....he's no worth the time or energy, tell him that he and that chick can talk and see each other as much as he like cause you are out.
 
He's cheating, and he needs to go. The cheating doesn't stop until he's gone. The more you take him back, the more you're confirming to him that you'll put up with it.
 
See, I would have stopped at his first lie. Every boyfriend I've ever had including DH knows that I'm not stupid. It is very hard to lie to me because I compute well. I will Judge Judy that @$$!

So, that interaction wouldn't have been that long because after the first lie, I'm letting you know that you need to hit the door.

He's cheating. That's why he was so hot about you not answering his 4 phone calls. He's projecting his own dishonesty upon you.
 
I'm so sorry you're going through this. No man is worth all of this stress. A good man would 1) not be doing something that is so suspicious in the first place and 2) would be more than willing to give you a GOOD explanation for what's going on if there's even a chance something he's doing might look fishy, often before you even ask. I know it's hard to let go when you're emotionally attached to someone, but when you do and you're finally in the arms of a good man, you'll kick yourself for not doing it sooner.
 
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