Wedding Regrets

nuwoman02

nuwoman02

Member
Are there any ladies out there who have any regrets regarding their wedding? Maybe you did not put enough effort towards planning your wedding, spent too much money, or did not have a wedding at all and opted for a court house wedding?
If so, what would you do differently if given the opportunity?
 
I wish I hadn't paid my dang photographer so much. A lot of stuff we had people we know get us a deal, but the photography I saved. I worked hard and saved and the pics were terrible.

Luckily, my FIL took really good pics.

Before the wedding I was upset at how much the florist cost, but i look back now and don't regret. She was fabulous!
 
Even though we are young and broke I don't regret having a big wedding. Not one day. We didn't go into debt. We saved and had friends and family pitch in. In my culture weddings are a community affair, the community always pitches in time and $$.
 
I am happy I went the courthouse route, the bum was not worth expenditure! I'm praying I am sent the right man sometime in this lifetime. The wedding would be small at a wonderful venue with close loved ones and the cost would be minimal.
 
I also agree that a wedding should be intimate. Others would argue that the wedding should be a symbol of the love the couple shares.
Do you guys feel the wedding should mirror the love a couple has for each other? I also had a friend who swore up and down that the wedding is for the family. She also felt that not having a wedding is selfish :perplexed
 
NaturallyBlonde said:
I regretted how much was spent on food. It was most expensive part. RIDICULOUS!
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We both regretted the food.It was expensive and it taste nothing like the samples we tried originally.Other than that,it was the best day of my life and I wouldnt change anything else that we did for our wedding.:yep:
 
I regret not putting fourth enough effort towards our wedding. We were young and figured "what's the big deal and had family who felt the same way:nono:"
I started planning and got overwhelmed with the details and costs. It was very difficult at the time to allocate such large funds to one day. Parts of me regret not having a wedding but our ten year anniversary is coming up :yep: maybe renewing our vows may be a way to go :rolleyes:
 
nuwoman02 said:
I also agree that a wedding should be intimate. Others would argue that the wedding should be a symbol of the love the couple shares.
Do you guys feel the wedding should mirror the love a couple has for each other? I also had a friend who swore up and down that the wedding is for the family. She also felt that not having a wedding is selfish :perplexed
Click to expand...

Some people do feel that way. Is she American? In some cultures the entire community is involved in the wedding and even helps pay for it.
 
I regret that we spent so much time and money on a big wedding. I SO wish we had honeymooned for two weeks instead of one, gotten married then, and put the difference toward our first house.
 
I sooo wish we would just go to an Island or the JP! I can not justify spending all this money for a 6-8 hour day!!! I would prefer to invest that money in a home or paying down debt.
 
My main regret is that we spent so much money on our wedding cake, I really put a lot of energy into picking a wedding cake, and taking time to select a different filling for each layer that I thought our guests would like. In the end, we had a lot of cake left over and I probably should have gotten a much smaller cake and saved a few hundred dollars.

I also shouldn't have stressed out so much over some little things because everything fell into place. Overall, my day was wonderful, I think it was money well spent for the most part. Even my husband gets misty eyed when he looks at the pictures.
 
nuwoman02 said:
I regret not putting fourth enough effort towards our wedding. We were young and figured "what's the big deal and had family who felt the same way:nono:"
I started planning and got overwhelmed with the details and costs. It was very difficult at the time to allocate such large funds to one day. Parts of me regret not having a wedding but our ten year anniversary is coming up :yep: maybe renewing our vows may be a way to go :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

I understand where you are coming from. I had a very small wedding. Neither of us had much money. I was also working full time and going to grad school full time. The planning was just too much and there was drama surrounding the guest list. I was not living in the same state where we were going to have the wedding and this made it even harder. We ended up cancelling our big wedding and having a small ceremony w/immediate family at my parents home. I regret that my close friends were not there. I want to do something for a our 7th anniversary in 3 years.
 
i would not have put such high expectations on family members, that way i wouldn't have been disappointed in some of them.

i would have gotten my mom her own make artist :blush:. i put my family in charge of her make-up and oh well :nono:

i would have had a dress code for everyone walking down or escorting people down the aisle. i didn't think i would have had to specify "formal" but whatever. :lachen:now i know why people have "dress rehearsals" for their bridemaids :drunk:

i would have given the DJ a detailed list of "dinner" music. i didn't want to hear all Luther Vandross :rolleyes:

i would not have waited until the last minute to buy wedding jewelry :wallbash:

overall it was a beautiful event. just plan for something to go wrong and try to go with the flow. chances are no one will know, except you :wink2:
 
I have no regrets, but if I could do it all over again- we would have eloped in a private ceremony with the immediate family (the ones who actually care and are still active in our lives ) and had an extended honeymoon and left the rest in the bank.

It was small but, we could have still scaled back. At the time though, it was next to impossible to NOT get caught up in the hype. In hindsight, the wedding day is important, but the days after are soooo much more important.
 
One regret. The photographer was a close friend of my family and she tended to focus on the people she knew. So my ex's family and friends were overlooked in some of the pictures. Also she took quite a few important pics on a roll already used. :rolleyes:

As far as anything else, there are a couple things I would have done differently, but no regrets. I had a big beautiful wedding with all my friends and family there that was completely paid for the week before the wedding.

ETA: One of the things I am proudest of the most, is that my wedding looked more expensive than it actually was. My mom and I skimmed on a lot of the behind the scenes things that are not as noticeable to guests. This helped me keep costs low but still have a beautiful wedding.
 
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It is so funny that we just got a wedding invite to day. The wedding couple is asking that we adhere to a dresscode that will be strictly enforced:perplexed
Ladies will wear the color champagne and the men are asked to wear black suits :ohwell:
Out of respect to the bride and groom we will do it but is this odd?
 
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MizAvalon said:
Some people do feel that way. Is she American? In some cultures the entire community is involved in the wedding and even helps pay for it.
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She is American and oddly enough she paid the entire bill. With this being really important, they would have atleast helped her out :nono:
 
I think its a cute idea. Maybe their colors are black and champagne and they want everyone to fit in with their theme. If I ever get married, my theme will be black, white and silver. I would ask my guests to wear the same colors thay way no one is wearing orange, yellow and other rainbow colors to the wedding. I have some tacky people in my life and they definately need a dress code to follow.


nuwoman02 said:
It is so funny that we just got a wedding invite to day. The wedding couple is asking that we adhere to a dresscode that will be strictly enforced:perplexed
Ladies will wear the color champagne and the men are asked to wear black suits :ohwell: Out of respect to the bride and groom we will do it but is this odd?
Click to expand...
 
My wedding was the perfect destination wedding in Nassau, Bahamas. The regret was the dude I married. Tis all.

If I get married again I would do another destination wedding, maybe to JA or T & T.
 
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Our wedding was about 200 people, but his father did the ceremony. It was inexpensive, family oriented and perfect. I made my own wedding invites, his mom did the flowers, we decorated the church...my friends decorated the hall. I mean, it was just sweet, fun and perfect for us. Everyone said that it was the sweetest wedding they had ever been to.
 
nuwoman02 said:
It is so funny that we just got a wedding invite to day. The wedding couple is asking that we adhere to a dresscode that will be strictly enforced:perplexed
Ladies will wear the color champagne and the men are asked to wear black suits :ohwell:
Out of respect to the bride and groom we will do it but is this odd?
Click to expand...

That is a little odd. "Strictly enforced?" Anyone who doesn't adhere will not be allowed in?
 
I regret the family friend minister that we chose to marry us. He went off on this extra tangent after we said our vows and never gave us the chance to say "I Do."

I think my husband still has my nail marks in the palm of his hand.
 
OcoLove said:
Our wedding was about 200 people, but his father did the ceremony. It was inexpensive, family oriented and perfect. I made my own wedding invites, his mom did the flowers, we decorated the church...my friends decorated the hall. I mean, it was just sweet, fun and perfect for us. Everyone said that it was the sweetest wedding they had ever been to.
Click to expand...

This sounds beautiful:rolleyes:
 
MizAvalon said:
That is a little odd. "Strictly enforced?" Anyone who doesn't adhere will not be allowed in?
Click to expand...
"strictly enforced" seemed odd to me as well. Today, my hubby decided to ask the groom why there was a dresscode, you know are much more straight forward :ohwell:.
The reason is because the bride and groom fear people in their family would come in sneakers, shorts, raincoat, etc.
Now I get the picture, rather safe than sorry...:yep:
 
My regrets were;
my choices in bridesmaids, not having the videographer at our reception, and not wearing my reception dress the whole day.
 
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