Transitioners support thread

  • Thread starter Thread starter Bublnbrnsuga
  • Start date Start date
22 weeks along. ALMOST half way there. Last relaxer was August 25th, 2005. I don't know how long I'm going to transition. Maybe for a year. It all just depends on how much new growth I have at the end of summer when school is about to start. I want to start school with something FRESH and have a new look. I'm no longer using the growth enhancers (Surge, MTG, WGO, etc) because I haven't seen much for an enhancement. I'm just trying to keep it simple by CW twice a month, maintaning rollersets and moisture, MoIsTuRe, MOISTURE!


GOOD LUCK ALL MY TRANSITIONERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
I am now 100% natural! Transitioning complete(almost 13 months)! My mom urged me to just cut the rest of the relaxer off yesterday, mostly on the crown. She checked it for me and said she didnt see any relaxer ends anymore. :grin: I will be meausuring in april for the Q.u.I.Challenge.
 
Ladies, I just need to vent.

I am having some "I hate my hair" issues going on right now. I am in my 10th month of transitioning. For the last month or so I have become sick of dealing with my hair. Sick to the point where I want to cut it, but I know that if I cut at this point, immediately afterwards I will have serious 'oh $hit' issues.

So I have tried working on my styling skills, and I have none. My twists are too puffy at the roots and I've tried following the advice here about twisting downwards or starting twists by braiding, but I still have the puffiness at the roots. I had twists professionally done and of course they looked brilliant but I haven't been able to replicate that look.

Right now I am looking at a well moisturized lions mane sitting on top of my head. I know that I'm taking care of my hair correctly because both my natural and permed textures are strong and I have minimal shedding and virtually no breakage. But the styling is making me crazy. And I'm trying like hell to not lean on the maxiglide (although it has eliminated my desire to perm).

Tomorrow, I am going to go look for a wig, but I tried that route a few months ago and I couldn't find anything that didn't look ...well 'wiggy' on me, but I will try again and continue trying to learn to style this mop on my head.

The point of all this babbling is that if anybody can offer suggestions on what the hell I'm doing wrong with my twists/braids, I would greatly appreciate it.
 
JCoily said:
Ladies, I just need to vent.

I am having some "I hate my hair" issues going on right now. I am in my 10th month of transitioning. For the last month or so I have become sick of dealing with my hair. Sick to the point where I want to cut it, but I know that if I cut at this point, immediately afterwards I will have serious 'oh $hit' issues.

So I have tried working on my styling skills, and I have none. My twists are too puffy at the roots and I've tried following the advice here about twisting downwards or starting twists by braiding, but I still have the puffiness at the roots. I had twists professionally done and of course they looked brilliant but I haven't been able to replicate that look.

Right now I am looking at a well moisturized lions mane sitting on top of my head. I know that I'm taking care of my hair correctly because both my natural and permed textures are strong and I have minimal shedding and virtually no breakage. But the styling is making me crazy. And I'm trying like hell to not lean on the maxiglide (although it has eliminated my desire to perm).

Tomorrow, I am going to go look for a wig, but I tried that route a few months ago and I couldn't find anything that didn't look ...well 'wiggy' on me, but I will try again and continue trying to learn to style this mop on my head.

The point of all this babbling is that if anybody can offer suggestions on what the hell I'm doing wrong with my twists/braids, I would greatly appreciate it.
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A wig or weave sounds like a good change to ease your frustration. When I had more relaxer than natural my hair seemed puffy too....and then when I had more natural than relaxed my ends seemed stringy. Now that the relaxer is gone I dont notice puffy or stringyness. So, it def. gets better hang in there. hth
 
I am so happy you started this thread. Now I have two support groups: my friend who convinced me to go back to natural and of course LHCF. I love this forum. Well, I have been 13 weeks post now and I am loving my new texture from my new growth. I am really glad that I made this decision. Thanks for the support.
 
JCoily said:
So I have tried working on my styling skills, and I have none. My twists are too puffy at the roots and I've tried following the advice here about twisting downwards or starting twists by braiding, but I still have the puffiness at the roots. I had twists professionally done and of course they looked brilliant but I haven't been able to replicate that look.

The point of all this babbling is that if anybody can offer suggestions on what the hell I'm doing wrong with my twists/braids, I would greatly appreciate it.
Click to expand...

Well, I can't give too much advice about how to correctly do the twists, because I feel that I can't do them on my transitioning hair without doing micro twists or adding fake hair. The discrepency between my natural and relaxed hair is so great (thickness compared to thinness) that my relaxed hair cannot support good-sized twists.

In looking at how the professional did your twists--they are way smaller than yours, which is one key. The second is that she flat twisted the front, which is probably another key--she didn't really get the twisted only parts super duper tight, but the style holds tighter because of the flat twists. Obviously, the perm rods (masking the thinness of the relaxed hair) was key in your style's success too. What product did she use to twist?

There was a thread on np.com recently about how to not get puffy roots when doing twists--you should check there too. Keep your head up! :)
 
I'm feeling your frustration JCoily. I will be 7 months post relaxer this week and I am styled challenged too. I can't offer you any advice but I want you to know that I empathize with you. Lately I have been using my curling iron because I see no other way around. Good Luck with your transition.
 
MzTami said:
I'm feeling your frustration JCoily. I will be 7 months post relaxer this week and I am styled challenged too. I can't offer you any advice but I want you to know that I empathize with you. Lately I have been using my curling iron because I see no other way around. Good Luck with your transition.
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I didn't know you were transitioning MzTami! I am six months post, Good luck, see you on the other side! :p
 
May i join this group. I went 100% natural a bit over 4 years ago. After 2 years i found myself not able to manage my hair. So i caved in and relaxed. If i had known what i know now i would have never relaxed it. I have had a relaxer since i was 8 years old even though i only had it relaxed every 6 month, straight was all i knew.

Right now i am having some issues with my roots. The rest of my relaxed hair will be nice and neat, but if i try to run comb through the roots i run into problems. It will get so tangled. I am dreading the up coming summer. When i sweat its the worst. The last time when i went natural i just cut it like 2 inches short. So i never had to deal with 2 different types of hair. What can i do????
 
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shellzfoshizzle said:
I didn't know you were transitioning MzTami! I am six months post, Good luck, see you on the other side! :p
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Yeah I knew that you were transitioning and that we were pretty close in post relaxer months. Good Luck to you too.

Look out NATURAL here we come.
 
14 weeks post and still trying to learn how to style it. I also dont want to add extensions to my hair so the idea of braids isn't in the cards. Maybe getting my hair cornrowed or flat twisted again.

Good luck to all!!
 
16 weeks post... I'm loving my texture, but the styling is killing me!!! For the past month, I've been going to the Dominican salon to get it done so it will remain manageable. I didn't really want to get braids, but other than getting blowouts, I don't know if I can handle this stuff. But I'm gonna keep on keeping on...
 
I'm still transitioning, it's been just over a year now. I've got about 6.5" of new growth.
I started wearing my hair curly a few days ago and doing co-washes.
The relaxed ends are looser, probably type 2. But I love how my hair looks in a ponytail now! Which was unexpected because I hated ponytails while relaxed!
I am planning to chop in July this year, but it might be sooner.
 
MzTami said:
I'm feeling your frustration JCoily. I will be 7 months post relaxer this week and I am styled challenged too. I can't offer you any advice but I want you to know that I empathize with you. Lately I have been using my curling iron because I see no other way around. Good Luck with your transition.
Click to expand...

First off I want to congratulate everyone that has made the decision to chase this natural thang and also you ladies who are still hanging in there. It truly is commendable..:yay:

Believe it or not, I've all but forgotten how long(in terms of weeks) I've been in transition:lol: ..it will be a year in Feb. since I last had a relaxer and since Cheleigh( my hair sister! ) is about 47 weeks than I'm probably about 48 or 49 weeks...I too have come up on some serious hair challenges lately.

I had been surviving on making twists and then bantu knot-outing them, giving me a very curly look..I would basically make puffs and do updos in this curly state, but my temples and nape started getting too sore from the stress I was putting on them. I had vowed off the heat several months ago but realized I had no other option...My problem had been me trying to do relaxed styles with natural hair...I had to start thinking in terms of, "I'm natural, get used to it."

Now I don't so much mind natural, frizzy looking styles so a couple weeks ago I started using the Maxiglide, curling iron and/or blowdryer without the expectation of a super straight look. If it sweated out a little and the hair got puffy, that's okay, it's a lot easier to do twist/braid outs and bantu knot-out puffs because the hair isn't so thick....I didn't wash that for about two weeks!

The stress was also abusing my relaxed ends...I would have to plow through my natrual hair and gently pull through the relaxed ends...it was getting to be too much...one things for sure, I have no inklings of going back to the creamy crack.:lol: Just needed to give my hair a break....right now, I'm on my second day in a deep conditioning baggied bun , of which I'll probably rinse tonight and do yet another baggied bun, then on Thursday, CO, and blow dry...

I hope my experiences help someone, because you guys are a huge help to me. :up:

~op~

PS: I have no idea when I'll be updating my album. The battery compartment door on my camera is still broken and I need to use that warranty and take it and get it fixed.....Meanwhile,I told myself once I hit a year into my trans. I wasn't going to update but every 2-3 months because it will be a lot of the same. I do, plan on doing some how to's though..
 
Mini Update:

My right side and nape is growing. Slowly, but sure it is. You guys don't know JUST how damaged it was. It was over and under processed (if that is possible), it just started thinning out, breaking off and doing whatever the hell it wanted to do...SOOO...I chopped off the relaxed ends about two months ago, which consisted of about 3 strands :lol:...and so my right side is completely natural with about two inches of natural hair. You can't tell because of the way I wear my hair and it is covered. Anyway, the point is, it's growing. I'm happy.

So I'm trying to not wash my hair so frequently because CW and all that manipulation just isn't my thing. So my new regimine is to wash my hair once every two weeks. I will no longer be doing wet rollersets and sit under the dryer. It's getting too thick and just looks like a ball of fluff. What I will be doing from now on, starting tonight is blowdrying it (handheld), using my denman as an "attachment" to straighten out the roots, oil/grease it and curl it, then roll it and go to bed. I don't know how this will hold up considering I'm using HEAT, but we'll see. It sounds like a lot to do, but the majority of my time was spent blowdrying it trying to get it straight.

I can definitely tell that my hair is growing. Shrinkage is already setting in. My hair reaches the bottom of my neck and yet it seems to be at my ears. I HATE THAT! I guess I better get used to it.

Anyways, I have been transitioning for....this will make my 6th month. I can do it! I can do it! I don't know what my future plans are, but I really want to cut these STRINGS off! I am just not ready to wear a TWA. I will give myself til AT LEAST when school starts in August. If I am confident and feel secure with the length that I have then, then big chop it is. If not, I will give myself until the end of 2006. When that time comes it will be SO liberating. I really want to wear twist outs. I think those are soooo cute, easy (but I STILL can't do them!) and last for a while.

I do have a problem learning how to style it just as some ya'll do. I try bantu knots and they didn't come out ok. The style itself is cute, but it looked a HAM on me, maybe because my hair isn't the same length...just wasn't feeling it. I don't know how to flat braid, I can only do free single braids and when I do that, my ends (relaxed get all knotted and break off from me trying to unbraid (which usually ends up with me ripping the comb through to untangle). I tried single twisting but my hair doesn't stay twisted. Someone said before it was because of my relaxed ends and if I were to twist my natural hair, it would stay twisted. I know practice makes perfect but my arms, wrists and poor little fingers get tired of practing and I usually end up with an attitude because I can't master a style.

Thanks ladies, and good luck!
 
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msbrown76 said:
16 weeks post... I'm loving my texture, but the styling is killing me!!! For the past month, I've been going to the Dominican salon to get it done so it will remain manageable. I didn't really want to get braids, but other than getting blowouts, I don't know if I can handle this stuff. But I'm gonna keep on keeping on...
Click to expand...

Be careful with the blowouts. I recently discovered a 3 inch piece of hair in my crown when the rest of my natural hair is about 10 inches. I love how they do my hair, but I did not transition this long just to have breakage. Another option is to have them rollerset you ONLY, then go home and flat iron yourself with a ceramic iron.
 
caligirl said:
Be careful with the blowouts. I recently discovered a 3 inch piece of hair in my crown when the rest of my natural hair is about 10 inches. I love how they do my hair, but I did not transition this long just to have breakage. Another option is to have them rollerset you ONLY, then go home and flat iron yourself with a ceramic iron.
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Very interesting... I'll have to keep an eye on that. I was thinking about getting blowouts every 2 weeks, but maybe I'll make it for special occasions or once a month. I don't want too much stress put on my hair. I'm almost at APL, and I've come too far to mess it up now.
 
Transitioner here! Its been 5 months and twelve days since my last relaxer and my hair is thriving. I really try to focus most of my care to my NG since I view my relaxed ends (23 inches) as dead weight. I am going to try and extend this for another year before the big chop but that all depends on how fast my NG grows. I am soo looking forward to this journey and am even more excited that I would not be doing this alone!

As far as styles, I do lots of braidouts and buns. To prevent breakage I handle with extra care and detangle in sections. I also make sure to moisturize my scalp (combination of Vitapointe, Mango Butter, and coconut oil) before detangling. I only use heat for DC and protein treatments. The hardest part of transition IMO is patience. I find myself taking an extra hour to do my hair than before. But I am soo ready for a change!!

All the best in your individual journey to the land of "Nappy but Happy"!!!!:lol:. I'll meet you all at the end of the tunnel!
 
Paravthi, you should continue to treat te relaxed hair as well. At the line of demarcation your new growth has alot of stress and if you dont take care of all you hair, everything suffers. I hope that makes sense....
 
beyondcute said:
Paravthi, you should continue to treat te relaxed hair as well. At the line of demarcation your new growth has alot of stress and if you dont take care of all you hair, everything suffers. I hope that makes sense....
Click to expand...

Yes it makes complete sense...but I thought more stressed was placed on my relaxed hair since it is more fragile and susceptible to breakage? If I do not place as much importance on my relaxed ends, will that lead to breakage of my new growth? Also, how do I care for the dermacation line?:confused:
 
msbrown76 said:
Very interesting... I'll have to keep an eye on that. I was thinking about getting blowouts every 2 weeks, but maybe I'll make it for special occasions or once a month. I don't want too much stress put on my hair. I'm almost at APL, and I've come too far to mess it up now.
Click to expand...


I'm in the same boat as you. My last relaxer was 8/05/05, and I've been winging it with the help of LHCF. I do get DBOs every so often and was thinking I'd start going every 2 weeks. Now I've settled on once a month and for occasiions when I want to wear my hair down. I'm only 4in past my shoulders (in the back) with hopes of being BSL, but I don't want to ruin health. I've always had healthy hair (ALWAYS), and I don't want to mess that up while shooting for length.

My question to you veteran transitioners:

How do you refrain from becoming a PJ? I've been reading the boards for a couple of months and while it's very tempting to want to try EVERY single thing people suggest, I started this process to STOP being a slave to my hair. While my goal is to maintain my hair's health, I've never had to do all the manipulation that I've read here. What do you ladies think?

I'm a wash every week, condition/deep condition every week kind of girl. Since being on this board I've tried the CW every few days and find I lose MORE strands by wetting my hair so often during this transition phase. Am I alone here?

TIA
 
Parvathi said:
Yes it makes complete sense...but I thought more stressed was placed on my relaxed hair since it is more fragile and susceptible to breakage? If I do not place as much importance on my relaxed ends, will that lead to breakage of my new growth? Also, how do I care for the dermacation line?:confused:
Click to expand...

You are right, however, what beyond is saying is that you need to treat it all the same.

I made the mistake and tried to ignore my relaxed ends. They ended up fried looking and so unhealthy..

With 23 inches, you need to utilize those ends. Keep them healthy and strong because you'll need them as styling aids to get you through..

You will also need to do some strengthen treatments like aphoghee or emergencee(I suggest, as you become more natural use: honey, egg, evoo and mayo) every so often(6-8 weeks) or as needed This will help strengthen the relaxed ends as well as the line of demarcation. You want to keep that line nice and moist and strong. When moisturizing your hair, pay close attention to the line and be careful..Breakage comes with transtioning, but we are in control of HOW MUCH breakage.

No, your newgrowth won't started breaking if you take care of your hair as a whole. Hopefully, products that work on your relaxed hair will continue to work on your newgrowth.. Pay close attention to how your hair reacts to certain products and take note.

Let me suggest that you keep a journal.

HTH

~op~
 
FAMUDva said:
My question to you veteran transitioners:

How do you refrain from becoming a PJ? I

Since being on this board I've tried the CW every few days and find I lose MORE strands by wetting my hair so often during this transition phase. Am I alone here?
Click to expand...

I am a PJ, but after the initial flurry of activity while I tried to get a routine going, I slowed way down on my PJism. I told myself that I don't need any (or many) new products until I BC. The BC is my reward to myself to buy the products I REALLY want to try like Qhemet, Oyin, MHC, Asha, AG, Curls, etc. (although I just got Jessicurl in a swap I couldnt' resist :))

I didn't wash my hair very often until I started transition in earnest (August). I was surprised about the strands I was losing until I talked to my family, who told me my natural hair shed a lot. Also, I have found that now that the routine is set, I'm losing a LOT less hair. Finally, I lose more hair than I used to because I only detangle my hair when I CW. I haven't seen a comb in my head (other than to part it) since August. I guess it's okay, because my natural hair is thick as all get out.
 
My question to you veteran transitioners:

How do you refrain from becoming a PJ? I've been reading the boards for a couple of months and while it's very tempting to want to try EVERY single thing people suggest, I started this process to STOP being a slave to my hair. While my goal is to maintain my hair's health, I've never had to do all the manipulation that I've read here. What do you ladies think?

If something is working for you as far as technique and products are concerned, then stick with that. If you are looking for a change, review the product raves and decided what you think would be best for your hair. Usually, when one starts chasing every rave that hit the board, they get burnt out and end up back with what they were doing in the first place...:lol: If low manipulation is your thing, by all means STICK WITH IT!

I'm a wash every week, condition/deep condition every week kind of girl. Since being on this board I've tried the CW every few days and find I lose MORE strands by wetting my hair so often during this transition phase. Am I alone here? No you aren't alone..While CWing has benefitted a lot of ladies it also has been a curse to others. Generally, the phase(3-6month post relaxer phase) you are in, you will get shedding. I had been having lots of it when I wet my hair too(it has finally slowed down;) ), I'm doing all that is right so I'm chalking it up to much needed shedding. My hair isn't extra thin and I don't have bald spots so I'm okay with it. If the shedding is bothering you, stop the CWing or reduce it

HTH

~op~
 
Thanks Cheleigh and OnePraying! Much appreciated.
I do have very thick hair; even when relaxed. I've been using MTG for about 4 weeks now and it's getting even THICKER along with all the NG.

I'll stick to what's working. I really appreciate this place for transitioners :) !
 
WOW One praying put it down! I agree with everything she haas said. As far as not becoming a product junkie. I will try soemthign but if it doesnt work I give it away. Also it depends on what people are saying if product X keeps thier relaxed hair moisturized and I already have a product that moisturizes both my relaxed and new growth I pass on that product. No point in getting somethign that only works for half my hair. Also just as One praying said, you cant expect to have the same results as everyone else. (wtch out IM bout to curse) I use grease on my scalp and without it my hair growth slows to a standstill (tried for 6 months) and my hair got so brittle it was coming out in clumps. Every thing else stayed the same (shampoo, conditioner, etc) the only thing that was missing was my grease. On the other hand some women HATE grease and they say it harms thier hair growth and hair.

So... the moral is just because it works for 1 person (or 30 for that matter) does not mean its gonna work for you and if its not doing what you need then move on. I mean seriously if someone with a jherri curl said NEWSFLASH THIS JUICE MAKES MY CURL NICER! I wouldnt go gewt it because 1 I dont have a jherri curl and 2 I dont want to take any advice from anyone with a jherri curl. :D
 
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