to approach or not to approach?

[ALWAYZL8]

I am an old fashioned miss. I don't believe in chasing after guys. I think they should pursue me and that's that.

here's the situation:

I went to walmart and saw a handsome guy walking the isles. I had just been crying, but I quickly dried my tears and tried to shake the demons off. I kept on looking for what I needed. I get behind him in the checkout line and he turned around and looked at me. I started to say something or ask if I was standing too close, but I was quite agitated as the couple behind me was in my personal space. The guy proceeds to checkout and he has some trouble scanning his toilet paper. I could tell he was single as he was buying axe body wash, toilet paper, starch, a mother's day card, and a topsy turvy tomato plant. He kept scanning his toilet paper and I could tell he was nervous so I told him he was repeatedly scanning it. He looked at me, smiled and started looking for the lady to come and unlock the computer. He paid for his stuff and walked off. He didn't say thanks or goodbye. He sure was a tall drink of water!!!!

Should I have said something or just left it up to him to approach me?

 

[Filmatic]

I am an old fashioned miss. I don't believe in chasing after guys. I think they should pursue me and that's that.

here's the situation:

I went to walmart and saw a handsome guy walking the isles. I had just been crying, but I quickly dried my tears and tried to shake the demons off. I kept on looking for what I needed. I get behind him in the checkout line and he turned around and looked at me. I started to say something or ask if I was standing too close, but I was quite agitated as the couple behind me was in my personal space. The guy proceeds to checkout and he has some trouble scanning his toilet paper. I could tell he was single as he was buying axe body wash, toilet paper, starch, a mother's day card, and a topsy turvy tomato plant. He kept scanning his toilet paper and I could tell he was nervous so I told him he was repeatedly scanning it. He looked at me, smiled and started looking for the lady to come and unlock the computer. He paid for his stuff and walked off. He didn't say thanks or goodbye. He sure was a tall drink of water!!!!

Should I have said something or just left it up to him to approach me?

If he didn't say thank you I wouldn't have said a thing.

 

[YaniraNaturally]

^ I agree. Te didn't even really acknowledge you so. . .I think you were right not to pursue it further. When men want to pursue something they usually aren't shy.

 

[MissJ]

How do you know he was single?

And what would you have said. He saw you when you were standing in line, and if he were interested he would have spoken to you before you spoke to him.

 

[foxee]

How do you know he was single?

And what would you have said. He saw you when you were standing in line, and if he were interested he would have spoken to you before you spoke to him.

Seconded. He could be have a steady girlfriend. If a man is interested in speaking to you, he will. I had a guy abandon his cart full of groceries and run out into parking lot to introduce himself and ask for my number. I didn't even notice him while I was inside the store shopping. We dated for a few months after that.

This is not aimed directly at you but I think women have a tendency to over think things (myself included!). Sometimes a one time chance encounter with a stranger is just that.

 

[VelvetRain]

Seconded. He could be have a steady girlfriend. If a man is interested in speaking to you, he will. I had a guy abandon his cart full of groceries and run out into parking lot to introduce himself and ask for my number. I didn't even notice him while I was inside the store shopping. We dated for a few months after that.

The visual with this is funny. Yep you pretty much summed it up. If they are interested in you they will speak up quickly or make an attempt to talk to you. I had a guy follow me for about two or three city blocks in his car to talk to me after only saying hello at a red light. I was just being friendly.

 

[NYLegalNewbie]

If they are interested in you they will speak up quickly or make an attempt to talk to you.

This depends on who is doing the asking. When it comes to men of other races, you can't always assume this because it can often be untrue. Many will not chat up Black women due to the assumption that she wouldn't be interested (this has been discussed ad nauseum on other threads).

However, even if they're too shy to approach, before leaving the situation, they'll often give a little bit of a hint of interest - i.e. will glance back at you or at least say good bye. This guy did neither, so he probably wasn't that interested.

 

[ThickHair]

He didn't even say thank you for your help. Why would you want to be bothered with someone with no manners?

 

[DiamondDiva]

He didn't even say thanks. Let it go.

 

[softblackcotton]

I understand where you are coming from. Sometimes when I see guy that I am really attracted to or have crush on I tend to overthink his every move/glance/word. I search for any crump/inkling of a sign that he may be attracted/interested back. It happens. In my experience, even very shy guys try to get your attention if they really like you however arkward they may be.

 

[Dare~to~Dream]

I had a guy abandon his cart full of groceries and run out into parking lot to introduce himself and ask for my number. I didn't even notice him while I was inside the store shopping.

This reminds me....once there was a guy who apparently saw me at Wal-Mart (I didn't see him) and he followed me all the way to the Post Office which was way across town...he was basically like "I saw you at Wal-Mart and I followed you all the way here because I'm interested in you." I was thinking..."is he serious?" I didn't find him physically attractive and the fact that he saw me get in the car to leave and follow me...I was too through.