Thinking about ending it today

What should I do?

  • Stop playing, Platinum! Just BC!

    Votes: 62 72.9%

  • Don't give up, Platinum!

    Votes: 22 25.9%

  • Other

    Votes: 1 1.2%
  • Total voters
    85
  • Poll closed .
Platinum

Platinum

Well-Known Member
Some of you know that I've been transitioning for a year :yay: but I think I'm ready to give up.:sad: I'm not talking about going back to relaxers, I'm actually thinking about BC'ing today. I got a sew-in 2 days ago but I took it out. The hair was beautiful but I didn't feel comfortable wearing it. Also, the braider's cornrows were too tight. They were so tight, I could barely turn my head (very tight at the nape). I ended up taking the cornrows out today. I thought about getting some Senegalese Twists but my scalp is still sore in some areas from the tight cornrows.

I'm starting to see some shedding, breakage. and split ends now. I can't decide if I should just try to find another PS or if I just want to BC. The only think stopping me from BCing right now is that I wanted more NG before I chop and I want to try to make APL by Dec.

I'm an over the road truck driver :driver: so I need a style that's cute and convenient. I don't like braidouts or wigs. Please help! I don't know what to do.:wallbash::wallbash: :crying3:
 
Platinum said:
Some of you know that I've been transitioning for a year :yay: but I think I'm ready to give up.:sad: I'm not talking about going back to relaxers, I'm actually thinking about BC'ing today. I got a sew-in 2 days ago but I took it out. The hair was beautiful but I didn't feel comfortable wearing it. Also, the braider's cornrows were too tight. They were so tight, I could barely turn my head (very tight at the nape). I ended up taking the cornrows out today. I thought about getting some Senegalese Twists but my scalp is still sore in some areas from the tight cornrows.

I'm starting to see some shedding, breakage. and split ends now. I can't decide if I should just try to find another PS or if I just want to BC. The only think stopping me from BCing right now is that I wanted more NG before I chop and I want to try to make APL by Dec.

I'm an over the road truck driver :driver: so I need a style that's cute and convenient. I don't like braidouts or wigs. Please help! I don't know what to do.:wallbash::wallbash: :crying3:
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Bantu-knot outs or twist-outs then? Maybe you can put it in a pony or bun and decide later, you may need a protein treatment:yep:

ETA:Try watching some Big chop videos on youtube, that might help you with your decision. good luck
 
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Have you already tried keeping your hair all one straight texture while transitioning using a healthier flat iron like the maxiglide? Also using a sour cream lemon mixture will help soften your new growth. I just started transitioning (2 months) and in the past when I had this much new growth my hair would start to break, but since I started using the sour cream/lemon treatment and keeping my hair all one texture I have had hardly any breakage in comparison to what I had before. Hope that helps.
 
Before you chop, you should think of what types of styles you’ll be able to wear once you’re fully natural. If you’re not good with short hair it might be better to wait until you have more length.

Since you want cute and convenient can you try some different protective styles for a while before you fully chop? How about flat twists or French braids?
 
Sorry to hear the sew in didnt work out for you :/....but I say dont give up!

it sound your in a style rut, I say dont chop! just search for a style that makes you feel comfortable and wont stress your scalp
 
Thank you Ladies. I just took a pic of my hair and this is what I'm dealing with at the moment. I have some shrinkage and I'm trying to stay away from the flat iron since I'm seeing split ends.
 

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Platinum when I got where you are the only thing keeping me from chopping was the braids. Even though you hate it is it possible to wear a phony pony for a few days until your scalp gets strong enough for braids?
 
Looks like where I was when I chopped! I BCd April 10th after a year of transitioning. For me, getting another sew in wasn't an option, and my braids and twists were not holding leading to sad looking twist/braid outs.

You might want to consider some protein.. but yeah, I just BC'd instead of dealing with the frustration. It was a shock at first, but I'm glad I did it :)
 
:bighug: It'll be ok. If you want to chop and braid until you gain more growth, that might be an idea. For me personally, managing the two textures became too much. I had hair everywhere, even though I knew to manage the protein/moisture balance. It got to a point where it was just too much to handle. I chopped and haven't looked back.

There are always braid/knot outs, flat twists, and braids. I wouldn't go back to the tight weave lady. Don't knock weaves all together though. You could do what I did a while back and have partial braid/weave do. The pic is on the growth specific testimonial page. That style lasted about a month and some change. I find that I like texture more than straight hair (unless I'm playing with different wigs)

Don't get too frustrated. Use this as an opportunity to get creative. :yep:
 
I too wonder if bc'g is the best thing for you :spinning: I wish your braider had not braided so tight and allowed you to rock your swe in for awhile.

Do you do long hauls? Local?
 
ILuvsmuhgrass said:
Just saw the pic! Wooooooooow! Girl your hair is thick with good growth! How much is just relaxed ends?
Click to expand...

I have 3-4 inches of relaxed ends (I think). My hair is very uneven so it's hard to tell. When straight, my left side is about SL, my right is a little below SL, and my nape is completely natural.
 
I just went through the same thing you are going through. I too had been transitioning for about a year and was trying to go as long as possible. Most recently I had tree braids in, and one evening I took out the braids, and had planned to go to the salon and get my hair pressed the next morning. The next morning it was raining and getting it pressed would have been a waste of money, so I just said to my stylist, you know what, I'm tired of dealing with these two textures, let's just cut off the relaxed part off. I was scared, but once it was done I was so happy. It looked much better than I thought it would, and I have never received more compliments on my hair in the last week than I have in the last five years probably. Even my parents who are super old school about black hair (their thinking was relaxed is right) LOVED it. All that being said, only BC if you are ready. But if you think you are, you probably are. Go for it!
 
Oh, Platinum, don't give up honey! Your new growth is so thick and healthy, its just putting your relaxed ends to shame. That's only natural, (lol) so don't worry about that. Since you have been transitioning for a while, you have enough NG to trim back a little on your ends. I was in your shoes a few months ago, after stretching for a year. My demarcation line was getting weaker and weaker, and my relaxed ends were performing mutiny on themselves!:blush: About 2 months ago I decided I wanted to texlax, rather than BC. I knew I still had to do something about my raggedy ends, so I decided to trim them back every 2-3months, about 3/4 of an inch, or so until the relaxed ends are gone. ( I am back at SL):spinning: I've already trimmed 2ce, and should finish the trimming rounds in June. Then around August, I will dust my ends every few months, just to keep the ends even and thick. By doing it this way, I can manage my natural texlaxed hair better, and patiently whittling away at the relaxed ends to achieve a whole new head of hair with only one texture. I also included Mane and Tail conditioner in my DC's, and have added a weekly protein treatment with Aphoghee 2 minute keratin reconstructor. So I would suggest slowly trimming off those relaxed dead ends, instead of waiting for them to break off on their own, which they will do whether you want them to or not. Then you can think about what to do with your hair; braid it up, or PS. Heck, you might even want to press or flat iron your new thick growth. Think about it, and take small steps first before you do anything drastic. You still have options!!:yep: Good Luck!
 
If you are anything like me i strongly suggest to NOT watch BC vids on YouTube unless you are 100% ready to chop right now. I got so excited watching other's BCs that I chopped 4 months sooner than I had planned. I don't necessarily regret chopping sooner because I was ready to be natural again ASAP, but I wish I would've have worked with my transitioning hair and given other style options a chance before pulling a Britney Spears.
 
I haven't made a decision as of yet. I'm thinking about doing a protein treatment and DC for now but I haven't ruled out the possibility of BC'ing tonight.:spinning:
 
Soooo, I saw the pic and I dont know about doing a BC, but those ends have to go girl. From the pic it looked like the damaged ends were about 2-3 inches long so I would say trim about 1-2 inches off and see how you feel. Those ends definitelty need to go girl they are holding your beautiful thick hair back!
 
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ILuvsmuhgrass said:
:bighug: It'll be ok. If you want to chop and braid until you gain more growth, that might be an idea. For me personally, managing the two textures became too much. I had hair everywhere, even though I knew to manage the protein/moisture balance. It got to a point where it was just too much to handle. I chopped and haven't looked back.

There are always braid/knot outs, flat twists, and braids. I wouldn't go back to the tight weave lady. Don't knock weaves all together though. You could do what I did a while back and have partial braid/weave do. The pic is on the growth specific testimonial page. That style lasted about a month and some change. I find that I like texture more than straight hair (unless I'm playing with different wigs)

Don't get too frustrated. Use this as an opportunity to get creative. :yep:
Click to expand...


ITA with everything, especially the bolded. I've considered this myself even though I'm having a pretty stress-free transition.
 
Tangie said:
I say just gon ahead and chop it.
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c/s! Your hair is long enough to do a variety styles including twists, twist outs, braids, braidouts, coils, coil outs, cornrows...etc. Plus the weather is warming up so you'll be able to wash more frequently if you choose.

I BC'd (after almost 8 months) last spring and I had a blast last spring and summer:lol:! You'll also get an opportunity to get to know your hair as it gets longer. I loved my short hair (and sometimes miss it) and it really helped me get to know what my hair likes. Good luck:)!
 
My Friend said:
Girl if you are driving 8-10 hours without really having to see people, I would be a MTG, deep conditioning, jherri juice, baggying wearing woman

:lachen::look::lachen::look:
Click to expand...

:lol: I was baggying under oversized knit caps a few weeks ago but I may have to do this again.
 
I spoke to my male friends about my dilemma and they all telling me that I shouldn't chop. My best friend (male) is happy that I'm transitioning but he was like :angry2::swearing: when I mentioned BC. I agree with you MissLeo, my ends are in bad shape so I know a trim is a necessity.

I haven't made a decision yet but I'm leaning towards BC'ing.
 
Have you considered chopping this early for a while now? Or is it only because of the frustration that you've felt the past few days with your two textures? Sorry I hope that makes sense. Basically I just don't want you to BC out of frustration and then regret it.

Perhaps you should sleep on it. But if you know in your heart it's time, then it's time.

Haha what a long non-answer!
 
I think you should get a trim if there is split ends, to make sure your natural hair stays healthy--

But im thinking if you have 3-4 inches of relaxed left, and you get a 1-2" trim, that you might as well cut the rest off.

I know how it is to want to reach a goal though, but in the long run sometimes IMO its easier to just make sure your hair stays healthy the whole time.

But I would do a trim, and do treatments untill your head isnt sore anymore, then get some twists. And possibly just cut the rest of the relaxed hair off, and put it in the twists. You will get back that 3-4" in no time.
 
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