The Ex and My Annulment...Sigh....

[Guitarhero]

So he remarried someone his family pushed off on him cuz they are worried about him. He recently went back home and got married, civilly, again. My advice to the new one, "Run b1tch, RUUUUNNNN!" Oh, btw, I wrote an entry on my blog hoping to just get those words out and edify someone else.

What's the problem then? Well, the first time when he called to ask for the license/divorce info dates (why he needed to call me...hmmm) for an immigration situation...(I had figured it out by then), I let him get his say out...then I had to ask him mine because I had been meaning to contact him that day anyway for my own annulment info. I needed all his baptismal information. So, he gave it to me but I cannot locate it on the web. Sigh. So, I called him again today to make sure he wasn't pissing me around and he gave the same. So, I made sure to get even more info in case that's what they ask me today in my meeting with the Church.

All of a sudden, he says, "did the kids tell you?" Shouldnn't that have been between us then I tell the kids? But anyhoo, word is out. Remember, I divorced him. I guess old boy never got over it cuz he broke out and told me his family asked why he divorced. And he asked me why again. "Cuz you were not good to me." Hello? Then he proceeds to say all manner of things a newly married man is not supposed to say. I had to remind him that the first failure was not my problem and that he needed to focus on his new wife and to treat her fairly, justly, kindly, with respect. Again, good representatives! Anybody E. African can attest to that. He is so emotional over our divorce, still. Why did he marry again? He expects this woman to put up with his talk blah/blah/blah? She don't wanna hear nothing about me.

I'm going to the Church today en pointe, pirouettes and all! Sauter et tout ca ahahahahaha! I'm going in happy as a lark. And he asked me who I was marrying. Nobody, yet, fool. I just want to be able to when the time comes. I swear. Some men can be so...uhhhhh!

 

[donna894]

Sounds like your ex has some growing up to do.

 

[Guitarhero]

^^^^^Ohhhh yessss...but that's not my problem now.:superbanana: But so shocking! I thought he was big and bad.

 

[ms.mimi]

Wow! He sounds like the type I would avoid like the plaque. Live well sweetie, just live well.

 

[Guitarhero]

He's a tricky man. He's tricked some very intelligent women..so I'm finding out now and thought it was just me. I married the most talented at it. Long story with not all the pieces out there for everyone to glean from...but even though he certainly wasn't perfect, people can fool the hell out of you until they get themselves and their world turned upside down. He was a "nice" man in the beginning. I'm divorced for 5 now with a separation of nearly 12. Living my life...yepp...now ready to remarry. Ahem, marry within the Church. That was my downfall, outside it.

But you'd think he would have moved on by now, right? All that stupid stuff he got good at during the marriage...he's hurting now? Sunshine Anderson and Syleena Johnson all rolled up into one, with some Millie Jackson sprinkles. I'm living good thanks be to G-d! I do feel sorry for the new one...for a sec. Had to talk with him yesterday about some info for the annulment...then this jump off the deepend emotionally again where he starts blaming. Then he says, "I didn't want to marry her, my family forced me because I have this diabetic problem (they can be like bi-polars without good control) and they don't want me alone. I marry my sister's best friend and she has a salon. She's coming in a year.,..I don't have much money now...don't know how it's going to go well...but she will have to WERRRRRRRKKKKKK when she gets here." Um, you married your bride and are expecting her to work and you're home on disability because you effed up your carpel tunnel surgery post-op by lifting sh!t continuously and tried to sue the doctors???? *****, I was planning my escape a long time ago lol.

I'm tell you, this is the makings of a book!~ And there have been many blessings for me. Sometimes, I thought G-d had abandoned me, but at the right time (as always), He reveals even more how He's taken care of me. I am forever grateful! Lawd have mercy! All that crazy crap of trying to down me and my cousin who helped me tremendously in this situation...saying all manner of evil things in the community where I've been outlawed...hmmmm....as it turns out, they are seeing reality now. If somebody out there is in this situation, hit me up with a PM and I can help you, especially if you married a foreigner that went bat sh!t crazy post-"I do." You know what I mean. Hit me up in a PM or take these lessons...you can make it, even if you have kids. I'mma do a backflip and an aerial cartwheel...might end up in the ER, though. But I'z happy!

 

[Almaz]

HapppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppY joy joy

Knowing the ins and out of the situation like I do I feel so sorry for his new wife she is going to come here and NOT be happy or we never know she MAY be the one that pulls a fast one on him. I heard that she was looking for a way to get to the states anyway so she has something planned and in the wood work too so don't be SUPRISED as soon as she gets here she is also planning her exist Plan too. I have heard (and you know I have never lied about this) that she has talked to an American trained Lawyer back home and she is asking about the child support she is afraid that they will be taking money out of HER pocket so she is here to get here but don't be suprised as soon as she gets settled she will be knocking on YOUR door for a RIDE to Ethioland USA (Washington DC) Just drop ole girl off at the border and keep rolling. This woman is 35 and she has lived a FULL life so she ain't stupid this is just her way to get to the USA TRUST me on this. Oh yeah he got a live one.

Its not going to end well for him cause he is going to end up alone AGAIN and he can't blame anyone but himself but we know that he has one of the worst case of NPD(Narrisstic Personality Disorders) I have ever seen in my life

 

[Ladybelle]

NPD is dangerous. I've witnessed it and experienced it. I've also read that NPD is the hardest mental illness to cure or treat.

OP- are you okay? You sound like you are. I wonder what happens to men like this after the divorce. Do they find someone else to mistreat? Do they go through the same antics to trick the next one into loving him? Do they ever hit rock bottom and HAVE to change? Do they ever realize just how effed up they are in the head? I mean it doesn't seem fair that they get to continue to live in their own created versions of reality while others like yourself are hurt by their twisted realities.

I'm elated for you - you are a true trooper. I don't know the ins & outs of your situation, but I do know that any woman who gets out of a bad situation such as yours is a sHERO in my book!!!

((hugs)).

 

[Honey Bee]

Wait, I'm confused... I thought Guitarhero and Almaz were related by marriage? So... is this the guy?

 

[Almaz]

Her EX is a cousin of mine His immediate family converted out of Judaism years ago when he was young to avoid religious Discrimination in Ethiopia that was and Still is rampant in the country Like a lot of jews back home they converted to get better jobs and less heat but at home they still practised Judaism in the closed door of their homes (Most of them are trying to get to Israel now there are issues regarding this) she married him hence she is my cousin by marriage the majority of my family had nothing to do with them after they converted because they thought of them as sellouts. And it STILL did not stop the discrimination in some cases actually the BS became even worse. I being the type of person that I am STILL stayed in contact because Family is family you may change you religion but you are still my family PERIOD even though I vehemently disagreed with what they did I still respected and understood WHY they did it. So no judgement here if thats what you gotta do and given the situation back then I hold no judgement

I have known him since the day he was born he was an arse hole as a child and when he grew up he became even a Bigger ahole very rich very spolied and very rotten to the core. But on the outside charming and very handsome and EXTREMELY intelligent. When he came here he thought that he was going to live the life of a Pasha but without putting in all the hard work it takes. Everyone else that immigrated whereever they immigrated. France, England Germany Israel America South America we are all doing fine fine and great but he never took the hint that America is NOT like back home and you have to work work and work smart if you want to live a lifestyle you had back home with drivers maids cooks and someone to guard your house and lay out your clothes in the morning WE ALL had that but when you leave if you want to continue this you better have your game on by getting and education getting a good job AND having some kind of side income but trying to lay up on educated women to see you through is not going to make it soon they will get tired of your nonsense and bounce

 

[Almaz]

She is fine she's got people that love her (like me dearly and has her back) And yes He used that same charm and wit for his next maybe victim and again its never HIS fault always the other person or persons people places or things. Some of them never realise and some never hit rock bottom because as soon at the next victim leaves he/she will charm their way to another victim so the revolving door never stops turning. Lies Lies more LIES wit charm These people are sociopaths too it goes hand and hand with NPD

HERE is an article in the Financial Times I remember reading last year and it is a textbook example.

http://www.ft.com/cms/s/2/5ff67be2-b636-11df-a784-00144feabdc0.html#axzz1M12xljo5

For all the 50/11 threads on here saying OH I would have seen the signs and Oh that would never happen to me Blah Blah. Yeah I am sure it has cause of all the 50/11 threads about being emotionally abused or the KANG that buys magnum condoms when he is actually shorter than a thumb. You don't know it unless you are in it and got out of it then you realise what this person really was about. Then being Diabetic on top of it not controlling his sugar with all that on top of it makes for one interesting to say the least type of person. So to some who thinks that it can never happen to him. OH I have seen doctors and lawyers tricked by him. I mean HARVARD EDUCATED STREET WISE Women. So if it can happen to them it can happen to anyone. If you think it can't then one is just as Delusional IMO

NPD is dangerous. I've witnessed it and experienced it. I've also read that NPD is the hardest mental illness to cure or treat.

OP- are you okay? You sound like you are. I wonder what happens to men like this after the divorce. Do they find someone else to mistreat? Do they go through the same antics to trick the next one into loving him? Do they ever hit rock bottom and HAVE to change? Do they ever realize just how effed up they are in the head? I mean it doesn't seem fair that they get to continue to live in their own created versions of reality while others like yourself are hurt by their twisted realities.

I'm elated for you - you are a true trooper. I don't know the ins & outs of your situation, but I do know that any woman who gets out of a bad situation such as yours is a sHERO in my book!!!

((hugs)).

 

[Almaz]

Anymore questions

Wait, I'm confused... I thought @Guitarhero and @Almaz were related by marriage? So... is this the guy?

 

[Guitarhero]

HapppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppY joy joy

Knowing the ins and out of the situation like I do I feel so sorry for his new wife she is going to come here and NOT be happy or we never know she MAY be the one that pulls a fast one on him. I heard that she was looking for a way to get to the states anyway so she has something planned and in the wood work too so don't be SUPRISED as soon as she gets here she is also planning her exist Plan too. I have heard (and you know I have never lied about this) that she has talked to an American trained Lawyer back home and she is asking about the child support she is afraid that they will be taking money out of HER pocket so she is here to get here but don't be suprised as soon as she gets settled she will be knocking on YOUR door for a RIDE to Ethioland USA (Washington DC) Just drop ole girl off at the border and keep rolling. This woman is 35 and she has lived a FULL life so she ain't stupid this is just her way to get to the USA TRUST me on this. Oh yeah he got a live one.

Its not going to end well for him cause he is going to end up alone AGAIN and he can't blame anyone but himself but we know that he has one of the worst case of NPD(Narrisstic Personality Disorders) I have ever seen in my life

GIRL!!! Now I word from a little bird in my house that he was being evasive and tricky about his trip back home. See, I don't talk much to him anymore, only when absolutely necessary. But now I hear that he was planning this little marriage all along. Kewl...but why put your kids up in that mess? Why go on and on asking why I divorced you? That's over with. He lied again. And about child support? That's exactly why her a$$ is staying over there a year, until they can settle this where she believes she won't be held responsible. I bet she's thinking of backing the hell out about now. Did he even tell her about his situation yet? Or did he embellish the troof?

 

[Guitarhero]

NPD is dangerous. I've witnessed it and experienced it. I've also read that NPD is the hardest mental illness to cure or treat.

OP- are you okay? You sound like you are. I wonder what happens to men like this after the divorce. Do they find someone else to mistreat? Do they go through the same antics to trick the next one into loving him? Do they ever hit rock bottom and HAVE to change? Do they ever realize just how effed up they are in the head? I mean it doesn't seem fair that they get to continue to live in their own created versions of reality while others like yourself are hurt by their twisted realities.

I'm elated for you - you are a true trooper. I don't know the ins & outs of your situation, but I do know that any woman who gets out of a bad situation such as yours is a sHERO in my book!!!

((hugs)).

Thank you Gurl!!! See, I was a little girl fresh from mom and dad's house when I married him. He had the best of representatives. Even his first cousin who grew up like his brother is a minister of the choich and cheats on his wife...something I learned much later. People can say what they want about being smart enough...but until they see this in action...they don't know what they're talking about. Master of disguises. I'm fine and moving on. So happy, even with any pitfalls along the way. I'm free!!! Hallelujah! He can't sue me ...he can go to the courts for nothing...he's got a new wife and she's gonna have to deal with it. NPD, they must put out flyers on this illness on every college campus in the U.S. and workplace lunchroom bulletin board...sux teeth.

 

[Guitarhero]

getting and education getting a good job AND having some kind of side income but trying to lay up on educated women to see you through is not going to make it soon they will get tired of your nonsense and bounce

Yeah, both in college at the time but diff. schools and cities. And who would have thought he wouldn't have finished? Once I applied to graduate school, he just kinda gave up...but we were already married then.