"Swangin' Hair Like a White (or other race) Girl!"-Do you Take Offense to this?

[Poohbear]

Getting a perm is a right of passage it's "eradicates" some of our blackness.

I got a perm at 1 and a half and BELIEVE ME BE it erased NONE of my blackness.

All of this being natural makes me embrace my true blackness is true BULL to me and I feel is just another petty way to divide and separate blacks. Hair is purely cosmetic to me.

JMHO

ETA. don't see relaxers as a must but as an option that is utilized in my family... kinda like makeup for some

Ummmm, she was not saying getting a relaxer eradicates some of your blackness... she's talking about how a relaxer gets rid of a natural feature of a young girl...that natural feature being her natural hair, NOT her being Black.

Embarcing your natural hair does not make you embrace your true blackness...there's no such thing... you're just embracing your God-given natural hair texture when you wear your hair naturally. It's nothing about being more Black. Embracing your natural hair is just about embracing your hair that naturally grows out of your scalp, regardless of your race.

 

[mzhotniz86]

it really aint that big of a deal to me. some people just read too much into it. wanna take it back to the motherland and stuff and you'll be surprised , honestly, to know how many white chicks want kinkier hair. i think we can do an even trade lol

 

[SkinnyMocah]

*shrug* I'm guilty of saying it, because my hair does not swing. The first time I went to a Dominican salon and my hair moved with the breezze, I wanted to pass out. There's nothing quite like walking past a window or a mirror and seeing your hair standing straight UP ro OUT and not knowing how long it has been that way. It has nothing to do with wanting to be white and everything to do with wanting hair that has some body to it that swings. The first hair that comes to mind to liken it to is caucasian hair. I had a Japanese roomie in college and her hair was just as thick and coarse as mine.

 

[Hidden_Angel]

swing......... its funny because ive always wanted swing to my hair but once i got braids and they swung somuch i hated them with a passion..
i want lots of body but no movement..

 

[happycakes]

Camelia,

Illinois is a pretty large city and has a large population of black women here, so I may be a bit confused about your comments below in bold. I live in Illinois and I personally am pretty offended about the comments about your noticing that most black women (outside of your family) that you have seen in Illinois don't have clean or touchable hair. So what makes your family's hair so different?

Am I the only one offended by this comment? That is a different conversation all together and seem very outta place. I would never expect someone with our heritage or even half of our heritage to say that about a whole group of women.

I had to read this comment a couple of times to see if I was just seeing things.

I respect the fact that you have the right to your opinion, but that comment is a pretty ugly pill to swallow. I don't suppose you or your family would be comfortable with the reversal of this comment. Don't let me start about the lice and wring worm situation that a lot of non-black women have.

I really didn't mean to jack this thread, but I just couldn't stay quiet about this one.
_______________________________________________________________

I first heard that expression on here. I don't see anything offensive about it.

Naturally curly hair and clean flowing hair are not mutually exclusive. We have too much proof here to think otherwise. But outside of family members, most of the black women I see don't have hair that looks clean or touchable, and maybe it's just because they're are very few black people where I live, but I'm being honest.__________________

 

[Desert Skye]

Camelia,

Illinois is a pretty large city and has a large population of black women here, so I may be a bit confused about your comments below in bold. I live in Illinois and I personally am pretty offended about the comments about your noticing that most black women (outside of your family) that you have seen in Illinois don't have clean or touchable hair. So what makes your family's hair so different?

Am I the only one offended by this comment? That is a different conversation all together and seem very outta place. I would never expect someone with our heritage or even half of our heritage to say that about a whole group of women.

I had to read this comment a couple of times to see if I was just seeing things.

I respect the fact that you have the right to your opinion, but that comment is a pretty ugly pill to swallow. I don't suppose you or your family would be comfortable with the reversal of this comment. Don't let me start about the lice and wring worm situation that a lot of non-black women have.

I really didn't mean to jack this thread, but I just couldn't stay quiet about this one.
_______________________________________________________________

I first heard that expression on here. I don't see anything offensive about it.

Naturally curly hair and clean flowing hair are not mutually exclusive. We have too much proof here to think otherwise. But outside of family members, most of the black women I see don't have hair that looks clean or touchable, and maybe it's just because they're are very few black people where I live, but I'm being honest.__________________

Um,I dont see what is so offensive about her comment..in fact I do not think her comment is offensive at all. Illinois is a state not a city therefore maybe she lives in an area that does not have alot of AAs.She is only speaking from her experience.

And about her being diffrent,I do not think she is trying to say she is better than other AAs but maybe she and her family know how to CARE for their hair better than most AAs.

I know what she is talking about because I too live in an area that does not have a large AA population and ladies here tend to have short, damaged hair. Not all, but the majority. Thats just what I see.Let's face it,information on proper hair care is really not that common which is the reason for sites such as LHCF to exist

 

[happycakes]

Glossy,

She didn't say damaged hair, she spoke of unclean and untouchable black women hair. Did you read the quote? You're the one speaking of damaged hair. Saying most black women have damage hair or something to that wouldn't be so offensive, but to come out right to say unclean and untouchable hair, that's insulting.

And besides from what I understand about her background (and yours), she is mixed. I bet her hair and the rest of the family's hair is a bit different from the black women that she is referring to. So you mean to tell me that if she was a non-mixed black women she too would have unclean hair, come on. I guess these people don't wash either, huh. Just another group of Nappy Headed Ho's I suppose.

Well let me put this out there, my mom teaches first graders in the south and she tells me the saddest stories about how the kids come to school dirty and a head full of lice and ringworms it's mainly the white kids. Now would I go telling people that? My girlfriend went to a Yoga classes and had to quit because she got ringworms from the mats and she was the only black woman there. And yes, she did tell her closes friends and none of us are wanting to take Yoga now.

Another example, that's like me saying that every one that I see with dreadlocs has unclean and untouchable hair. I just wouldn't say anything like that, you never know who you are offending.

So we can just agree to disagree. And by the way your correcting me doesn't offend me at all, I'm just glad that you are interested in my opinion. I just find it offensive period!

 

[sweetwhispers]

 

[camellia]

Camelia,

Illinois is a pretty large city and has a large population of black women here, so I may be a bit confused about your comments below in bold. I live in Illinois and I personally am pretty offended about the comments about your noticing that most black women (outside of your family) that you have seen in Illinois don't have clean or touchable hair. So what makes your family's hair so different?

Am I the only one offended by this comment? That is a different conversation all together and seem very outta place. I would never expect someone with our heritage or even half of our heritage to say that about a whole group of women.

I had to read this comment a couple of times to see if I was just seeing things.

I respect the fact that you have the right to your opinion, but that comment is a pretty ugly pill to swallow. I don't suppose you or your family would be comfortable with the reversal of this comment. Don't let me start about the lice and wring worm situation that a lot of non-black women have.

I really didn't mean to jack this thread, but I just couldn't stay quiet about this one.
_______________________________________________________________

I first heard that expression on here. I don't see anything offensive about it.

Naturally curly hair and clean flowing hair are not mutually exclusive. We have too much proof here to think otherwise. But outside of family members, most of the black women I see don't have hair that looks clean or touchable, and maybe it's just because they're are very few black people where I live, but I'm being honest.__________________

I'm sorry if I offended you with my comments. In no way whatsoever was I trying to imply that I feel the women in my family are "different" or "better" than anyone else.


I live in a rather small and almost 90% white suburb. The few black women that I do see on a daily basis have hair that looks like it hasn't been washed in a very long time and isn't well cared for. In no way do I think they are representative of all black women. I freely admit that if I lived in an area with more black women my experiences might be completely different.

I grew up in a very Hispanic neighborhood in Chicago, most of the people there were Mexican or Puerto Rican, with a few black and a few white people thrown in too. The black women who lived in my neighborhood didn't have healthy or clean looking hair. I'm not saying this to be offensive, but there was not a single black woman that I saw when I was a child who had long, healthy, soft, or even clean looking hair.

I was so excited to find LHCF because outside of the black women in MY family, I really didn't know any women of color with healthy beautiful hair the way the sisters here have. I'm well aware that other races have problems with their hair too. My hair was a badly damaged, breaking mess for many years. When we were children, we all got head lice TWICE! I am not trying to put myself or my family up on any kind of pedestal, I'm just sharing my experiences and what I've seen.

 

[camellia]

Glossy,

She didn't say damaged hair, she spoke of unclean and untouchable black women hair. Did you read the quote? You're the one speaking of damaged hair. Saying most black women have damage hair or something to that wouldn't be so offensive, but to come out right to say unclean and untouchable hair, that's insulting.

And besides from what I understand about her background (and yours), she is mixed. I bet her hair and the rest of the family's hair is a bit different from the black women that she is referring to. So you mean to tell me that if she was a non-mixed black women she too would have unclean hair, come on. I guess these people don't wash either, huh. Just another group of Nappy Headed Ho's I suppose.

Well let me put this out there, my mom teaches first graders in the south and she tells me the saddest stories about how the kids come to school dirty and a head full of lice and ringworms it's mainly the white kids. Now would I go telling people that? My girlfriend went to a Yoga classes and had to quit because she got ringworms from the mats and she was the only black woman there. And yes, she did tell her closes friends and none of us are wanting to take Yoga now.

Another example, that's like me saying that every one that I see with dreadlocs has unclean and untouchable hair. I just wouldn't say anything like that, you never know who you are offending.

So we can just agree to disagree. And by the way your correcting me doesn't offend me at all, I'm just glad that you are interested in my opinion. I just find it offensive period!

Okay, I should let this go...

But I have not EVER referred to anyone, either on or off on the internet as a "ho" so I really don't know where that came from.

As far as our hair "being different", when I refer to the black women in my family, I am not just speaking of myself and my sisters. I include my aunts and cousins, as well as my paternal grandmother when she was alive. I'm not expert at hair typing, but most of them have very tightly curled hair, I'm going to guess and say something like a 4A or 4B. Most of my female relatives are natural. Their hair has always looked clean, soft and touchable. That's why I specifically said "Naturally curly hair and clean flowing hair are not mutually exclusive." They're not.

 

[B_Phlyy]

I'm sorry if I offended you with my comments. In no way whatsoever was I trying to imply that I feel the women in my family are "different" or "better" than anyone else.


I live in a rather small and almost 90% white suburb. The few black women that I do see on a daily basis have hair that looks like it hasn't been washed in a very long time and isn't well cared for. In no way do I think they are representative of all black women. I freely admit that if I lived in an area with more black women my experiences might be completely different.

I grew up in a very Hispanic neighborhood in Chicago, most of the people there were Mexican or Puerto Rican, with a few black and a few white people thrown in too. The black women who lived in my neighborhood didn't have healthy or clean looking hair. I'm not saying this to be offensive, but there was not a single black woman that I saw when I was a child who had long, healthy, soft, or even clean looking hair.

I was so excited to find LHCF because outside of the black women in MY family, I really didn't know any women of color with healthy beautiful hair the way the sister here have. I'm well aware that other races have problems with their hair too. My hair was a badly damaged, breaking mess for many years. When we were children, we all got head lice TWICE! I am not trying to put myself or my family up on any kind of pedestal, I'm just sharing my experiences and what I've seen.

I did not find your original statement offensive at all and I can totally understand where you're coming from. I actually live in Chicago, but in a mixed neighborhood where there are few blacks and I regularly see black girls with stiff, brittle hair and visible dandruff. And lets be real, many people here have friends and family members who tell us we're crazy for washing and taking better care of our hair, while they're sitting around with dry damaged hair.

 

[PinkPeony]

I did not find your original statement offensive at all and I can totally understand where you're coming from. I actually live in Chicago, but in a mixed neighborhood where there are few blacks and I regularly see black girls with stiff, brittle hair and visible dandruff. And lets be real, many people here have friends and family members who tell us we're crazy for washing and taking better care of our hair, while they're sitting around with dry damaged hair.

Ditto to your whole post.
Besides since when are blk women with clean,healthy looking hair the norm?
If they would be we all wouldn't be here on this board and we wouldn't suspect that other blk women with healthy,long hair are *niko's cousin*

 

[esoterica]

i agree with camellia & ella. 100% non-PC honesty. gets people riled up everytime.

 

[RainbowCurls]

Ditto to your whole post.
Besides since when are blk women with clean,healthy looking hair the norm?
If they would be we all wouldn't be here on this board and we wouldn't suspect that other blk women with healthy,long hair are *niko's cousin*

Exactly

Seriously, some people seem to confusing LHCF with the real world.

 

[Ms Lala]

I did not find your original statement offensive at all and I can totally understand where you're coming from. I actually live in Chicago, but in a mixed neighborhood where there are few blacks and I regularly see black girls with stiff, brittle hair and visible dandruff. And lets be real, many people here have friends and family members who tell us we're crazy for washing and taking better care of our hair, while they're sitting around with dry damaged hair.

I don't find the statement offensive either, unfortunately it's somewhat true for me to. I grew up in chicago and alot of the sisters wore hard hairstyles. Now natural hair and softer hair is more in style so I am noticing some differences but overall not healthy hair. Most of my friends went to the shop every 2 weeks and got their hair fried. I believe that is the main reason for the lack of growth among many of the women.Since I have moved to the DC area I notice alot more sisters with healthy hair.

 

[Desert Skye]

Glossy,

She didn't say damaged hair, she spoke of unclean and untouchable black women hair. Did you read the quote? You're the one speaking of damaged hair. Saying most black women have damage hair or something to that wouldn't be so offensive, but to come out right to say unclean and untouchable hair, that's insulting.

And besides from what I understand about her background (and yours), she is mixed. I bet her hair and the rest of the family's hair is a bit different from the black women that she is referring to. So you mean to tell me that if she was a non-mixed black women she too would have unclean hair, come on. I guess these people don't wash either, huh. Just another group of Nappy Headed Ho's I suppose.

Well let me put this out there, my mom teaches first graders in the south and she tells me the saddest stories about how the kids come to school dirty and a head full of lice and ringworms it's mainly the white kids. Now would I go telling people that? My girlfriend went to a Yoga classes and had to quit because she got ringworms from the mats and she was the only black woman there. And yes, she did tell her closes friends and none of us are wanting to take Yoga now.

Another example, that's like me saying that every one that I see with dreadlocs has unclean and untouchable hair. I just wouldn't say anything like that, you never know who you are offending.

So we can just agree to disagree. And by the way your correcting me doesn't offend me at all, I'm just glad that you are interested in my opinion. I just find it offensive period!

Yup we are going to definitely disagree on this because I really dont see it that way at all ( and apparently I'm not the only one).Well,I'm glad I didnt offend you but I really wish you did not bring up me or Camillia being mixed like that because it just so irrelevant. BUT anywho...I should be getting back to my hmw anyway

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Camelia,

Illinois is a pretty large city and has a large population of black women here, so I may be a bit confused about your comments below in bold. I live in Illinois and I personally am pretty offended about the comments about your noticing that most black women (outside of your family) that you have seen in Illinois don't have clean or touchable hair. So what makes your family's hair so different?

Am I the only one offended by this comment? That is a different conversation all together and seem very outta place. I would never expect someone with our heritage or even half of our heritage to say that about a whole group of women.

I had to read this comment a couple of times to see if I was just seeing things.

I respect the fact that you have the right to your opinion, but that comment is a pretty ugly pill to swallow. I don't suppose you or your family would be comfortable with the reversal of this comment. Don't let me start about the lice and wring worm situation that a lot of non-black women have.

I really didn't mean to jack this thread, but I just couldn't stay quiet about this one.
_______________________________________________________________

I first heard that expression on here. I don't see anything offensive about it.

Naturally curly hair and clean flowing hair are not mutually exclusive. We have too much proof here to think otherwise. But outside of family members, most of the black women I see don't have hair that looks clean or touchable, and maybe it's just because they're are very few black people where I live, but I'm being honest.__________________

Sorry I don't see any offense.

She is telling the truth. Can she not say those things because she is mixed?

She is saying nothing that I didn't say in my original post and many other posters said the same. I don't get it.

 

[Desert Skye]

Sorry I don't see any offense.

She is telling the truth. Can she not say those things because she is mixed?

She is saying nothing that I didn't say in my original post and many other posters said the same. I don't get it.

Thank you! Thats what I understood from her post too.

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Ditto to your whole post.
Besides since when are blk women with clean,healthy looking hair the norm?
If they would be we all wouldn't be here on this board and we wouldn't suspect that other blk women with healthy,long hair are *niko's cousin*

Basically.

Sorry but I get the feeling Cam is being picked on. And I don't think it is fair. EVERYONE else had the right to say whatever they wanted to say, why not Cam?

And I agree with her 100%. It's real deal whether we want to hear it or not.

 

[LocksOfLuV]

Thank you! Thats what I understood from her post too.

Okay so I see I am not alone.

 

[PinkPeony]

Basically.

Sorry but I get the feeling Cam is being picked on. And I don't think it is fair. EVERYONE else had the right to say whatever they wanted to say, why not Cam?

And I agree with her 100%. It's real deal whether we want to hear it or not.

Ummm yes

Lol @Esoterica and Rainbow

 

[Aubergold]

I'm soooooo confused

 

[LocksOfLuV]

I'm soooooo confused

WHY?!

 

[PinkPeony]

I'm soooooo confused

OT but I LOVE your siggy pic

 

[Aubergold]

WHY?!

I don't understand the debate, lol. If black women have dirty hair? Is Camellia saying her family is better than others? Why are people getting offended..... I mean was everyone washing 1-2 times a week before coming to LHCF, prolly not.




Thanks ella!