Spin Off: Poll - Relaxed or Natural = more male attention???

[dimpalz]

This is a spinoff rom the long/shot hair male attention thread. I've been natural from since June and I've noticed I get about he same amount of attention it's just more "refined" (no more hoody hoodrats, more suited and booted darkskinned goodness)

Obviously individual men have a preference but on the whole have you noticed a drop or increase in the amount of attention or even the quality???

 

[naturallylovely]

i dont think it matters, as long as it's done...

 

[sweetwhispers]

i dont think it matters, as long as it's done...

IA. I have been natural all my life and i can't say whether i would get more if i were relaxed, when i'm out with my friends who are relaxed we all get about the same amount i think.

 

[blueabyss333]

Men are vain. I'd say overall relaxed heads get more attention (for reasons I won't get into). HOWEVER, when you find that bouncy 4a/b, or that shiny jet black twa with bantu curls, or 3s with a fierce cut it's like .

 

[Crissi]

When I was in FLA all fresh shaved and all i got loads of attention, the same amount if usually get when i generally look good, which i did, so i dont think hair matters, its how you carry yourself

 

[bluediamond0829]

i think that more men are attracted to women with relaxed hair than natural...

 

[Minx]

Since I BC'd back in August, I get even more attention.
Not to say that I'm cute or anything, but this short cut is working in my favor; rocking my kinky/coily TWA shows off my facial features!

I have men approaching me, complimenting me, smiling at me.
Very polite, ya know?
Asking me, "Excuse me, can I talk to you for a minute?" (No, I'm seeing somebody ).

I'm not a young girl, but I'm in college (I'm in my 30's).
So the men on campus that speak to me now are like, "How you doin' today, sista?" or " Peace, queen, how you doin' today?"

It wasn't like that before.
When I was wearing my wigs, weaves, and ponytails, guys were allways trying to "holla". I don't have guys coming at me that way so much anymore.

And the type of males that repond to me have changed.
They are more like the "gentlemen" type.
Even the types that usually "holla" at women ( "Ay, yo shorty, come 'mere, let me holla atchoo for a minute".......), now speak to me with much more respect.


dk

 

[OneInAMillion]

Just my opinion, but men love long hair period. As long as it's looking fierce, I don't know if they know the difference all the time. When my hair was relaxed and breaking, nobody was tryin to give me the time of day . Big Healthy hair is what they love.

 

[CAPlush]

I have cycled back and forth between relaxed and natural, and I can say definitively, in my case, that there was absolutely no difference.

 

[babyblue]

I think relaxed may get slightly more attention because:
1)They are still the majority in most places and 2) Most men in this country have been conditioned to belive straight hair=prettier, more attractive etc. so thats what they go after.

Why? A man's first exposure is the women in his family. Many of our men grow up in homes with mothers and sisters who degraded natural hair verbally and went through great lenghts to keep their naps straightened. It's no surprise that this has influenced our men's preferences when it comes to hair.

That being said...in certain areas where natural hair is accepted more (ex. NYC) getting male attention is not really an issue as long as your hair is looking good.

 

[glamazon386]

Men are vain. I'd say overall relaxed heads get more attention (for reasons I won't get into). HOWEVER, when you find that bouncy 4a/b, or that shiny jet black twa with bantu curls, or 3s with a fierce cut it's like .

I'm gonna cosign with blueabyss. I do have to admit I get more attention with longer curly hair than short hair. I rarely get attention with short hair at all. Regardless if it's straight or kinky/curly.

 

[ajargon02]

When I was in FLA all fresh shaved and all i got loads of attention, the same amount if usually get when i generally look good, which i did, so i dont think hair matters, its how you carry yourself

You hit it right on the head. One can be a beautiful ice queen, rude little thing w/ beautiful long straight hair, just as a natural w/ a fierce do can be. I believe overall it's how you carry yourself. Men like to see kindness, self confidence, wrapped up in a sexy package, that's not rude. I think for most it doesn't matter what kind of hair you have in general, as long as the total package is right, jmho

 

[HoneyDew]

I'm gonna cosign with blueabyss.

OT - bmoreflyygirl, I am cracking up at that guy in the background of the pic in your siggie. He looks so clueless!!

 

[dimpalz]

I forgot to put a "no difference", sorry ladies, but I see you get the idea. Either way, like some said, I guess it's just gotta look good.

 

[plove]

IMO ( and for my experience) men think twice about how they are going to approach you when you are natural. I feel they think this is a woman who knows who she is, so me telling her she look good is not going to work, i have to come correct.

 

[glamazon386]

OT - bmoreflyygirl, I am cracking up at that guy in the background of the pic in your siggie. He looks so clueless!!

LOL I never even noticed it until you said something about it Honeydew! Gotta love the student police auxillaries on campus. He looked so lost trying to "chaperone" the black people party. He probably was like It's 2 am I should be home in bed instead of standing here in this hallway all night. We asked him to take a couple full length pictures for us though. So we put him to good use.

 

[NewYorkgyrl]

i think that more men are attracted to women with relaxed hair than natural...

I agree that a lot of BLACk men are. That is just based on some of their responses to natural hair or hair in general (straight and silky)

I won't be able to truly answer this poll or vote until I cut my relaxed ends off and be fully natural for a couple months. I feel that only then after experiencing both sides would I be able to vote appropriately.

 

[NewYorkgyrl]

Just my opinion, but men love long hair period. As long as it's looking fierce, I don't know if they know the difference all the time.

How would the man not know the difference...unless the Natural-haired woman is Always wearing her hair straight. I don't think men are that unaware.

 

[NewYorkgyrl]

I think relaxed may get slightly more attention because:
1)They are still the majority in most places and 2) Most men in this country have been conditioned to belive straight hair=prettier, more attractive etc. so thats what they go after.

Why? A man's first exposure is the women in his family. Many of our men grow up in homes with mothers and sisters who degraded natural hair verbally and went through great lenghts to keep their naps straightened. It's no surprise that this has influenced our men's preferences when it comes to hair.

That being said...in certain areas where natural hair is accepted more (ex. NYC) getting male attention is not really an issue as long as your hair is looking good.

Very good points. But besides NYC another place that is really accepting of natural hair is Philly. I see a ton or naturals out here and alot of men say they perfer that. I guess location really does play a part in it (sometimes)

 

[B_Phlyy]

I picked the last one because when I was natural, I got a lot more stares from everybody, but the men who actually approached me where "good guys".

 

[Aveena]

Well.. when I was rocking the natural mini fro & natural braid-outs I got NO .. attention. except for the occasional... "hello, my nubian queen" every now and then. I had a BF who HATED my hair.
Put a wig on...

WHOAAAAA!!!! erplexed Attention out of no where- cars crashes - can't walk down the street in peace? Marriage proposals from strangers you name it!

I HATE it.. but it is true. Men love long hair... but for me. They like it straight.

 

[Southernbella.]

IMO ( and for my experience) men think twice about how they are going to approach you when you are natural. I feel they think this is a woman who knows who she is, so me telling her she look good is not going to work, i have to come correct.

This is how I feel about long healthy relaxed hair too. In my experience, men seem to have more...respect or something. It's like they're in awe of a women with real long hair, and think she's either high class, or she has a man already. I never get hoodrats or anything like that. Most guys either stare, or approach me with respect. Well, unless they see my ring.

 

[Dannygirl]

depends on the person in my oppoin.. I wear the clear cut well dressed with my lil ffro and guys apporchad me MORE then when Im in braids or weaved out or relaxed with respect they see (the way im shaped along with the 'ya its all natrual and mine" personitly feeling like the ish) and they know to apporched with caution .... if I wasn't looking for length i wont even really relax my hair just enough to where id look lil longer (i have tight curls and they look soooo cute on my head)...

Natrual gernaly means "wisdom" in black peoples mind.. so..aint no weak guy gonna apporched you gernaly in that aspect and have you ever noticed that men tend to look more at your FACE with natrual hair?

 

[melodee]

Well.. when I was rocking the natural mini fro & natural braid-outs I got NO .. attention. except for the occasional... "hello, my nubian queen" every now and then. I had a BF who HATED my hair.
Put a wig on...

WHOAAAAA!!!! erplexed Attention out of no where- cars crashes - can't walk down the street in peace? Marriage proposals from strangers you name it!

I HATE it.. but it is true. Men love long hair... but for me. They like it straight.

Girl, I can relate to this story. I get the sexy and exotic comments when I wear my hair relaxed or pressed down, or a wig/weave.

When I'm nappy, I'm just a regular old nappy black woman out in the street.

 

[erin558]

WHOAAAAA!!!! erplexed Attention out of no where- cars crashes - can't walk down the street in peace? Marriage proposals from strangers you name it!

LMAO!!!

 

[erin558]

I think it depends on your hair type to be honest with you. If you are rockin' a 3b natural then dudes are going to flock because you have "Good hair" but if you are a 4C, you might still get attention but it will be from different guys and not as common, but it really depends on where you are.

since my hair is in the "growing out" phase men don't really approach me that much. the picture at the bottom is how my hair looks right now.

 

[NewYorkgyrl]

personly men tend to look more at your FACE with natrual hair if you've ever noticed that

I have heard a lot of men and women say this. Hmmm...interesting

 

[Crissi]

Since I BC'd back in August, I get even more attention.
Not to say that I'm cute or anything, but this short cut is working in my favor; rocking my kinky/coily TWA shows off my facial features!

I have men approaching me, complimenting me, smiling at me.
Very polite, ya know?
Asking me, "Excuse me, can I talk to you for a minute?" (No, I'm seeing somebody ).

I'm not a young girl, but I'm in college (I'm in my 30's).
So the men on campus that speak to me now are like, "How you doin' today, sista?" or " Peace, queen, how you doin' today?"

It wasn't like that before.
When I was wearing my wigs, weaves, and ponytails, guys were allways trying to "holla". I don't have guys coming at me that way so much anymore.

And the type of males that repond to me have changed.
They are more like the "gentlemen" type.
Even the types that usually "holla" at women ( "Ay, yo shorty, come 'mere, let me holla atchoo for a minute".......), now speak to me with much more respect.


dk

Thtas so true, when men started coming up to me and approaching me with manners i damn near fainted.

 

[Cheleigh]

Basically there's been no difference, although I think that more younger guys approach me now, because I look younger with natural hair than relaxed. When I was relaxed, it was more the length that interested men. Now it's the texture that interests them more. No real difference in the type of men either, so it's about a wash for me.

 

[Dannygirl]

Thtas so true, when men started coming up to me and approaching me with manners i damn near fainted.

yes?! i know...
IT was funny because I asked a guy what he thought of me and he was like "You seem to go agaisnt the grain you dont want to look like the others" and I'm like huh? i dress just like anyone elese..
his like no your hair?!(rocking the fro)

Another guy was like you seem like you do poerty and I was like.. WHAT? how you know ..most guys dont even realize it until i say somthing to them...
He was talking about my fro!

I was just like I did it for hair health reasons then to go agaist the grain. lol?