Spin Off: Poll - Relaxed or Natural = more male attention???

Quality and Quantity of attention...

  • Decrease in Attention

    Votes: 14 15.9%

  • Decrease in Attention, Increase in Quality

    Votes: 16 18.2%

  • Increase in Attention

    Votes: 23 26.1%

  • Increase in Attention, Increase in Quality =)

    Votes: 35 39.8%
  • Total voters
    88
den1 said:
i never get any male attention whether natural/relaxed
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Aww, Den. You need to have more confidence. I'm sure lots of guys would love to date you. Maybe you don't even notice the attention!:)
 
I think it depends on the man. Some men definitely prefer natural hair, and others definitely prefer relaxed/straight hair. I've dated men who preferred one or the other.

I think you can tell by how the guy reacts to your hair, whether he prefers one over the other. Also, some men really don't care, as long as the woman's hair is done!
 
I think I actually get slightly less attention when I wear my hair straight as opposed to my natural texture. But sadly the same quality. They run the gamut from the educated ive league types down to the dope boys.

Sometimes I wonder if guys are attracted to the light skin and 3b/c hair, b/c every guy I date says something about the "exotic" look I have and the hair I have practically all ask me if i'm mixed. Every once in a while I wondered if I had a 4abc type texture if it would weed out all the trifling guys and only bring out all the quality guys.
 
atltophilly said:
I think I actually get slightly less attention when I wear my hair straight as opposed to my natural texture. But sadly the same quality. They run the gamut from the educated ive league types down to the dope boys.

Sometimes I wonder if guys are attracted to the light skin and 3b/c hair, b/c every guy I date says something about the "exotic" look I have and the hair I have practically all ask me if i'm mixed. Every once in a while I wondered if I had a 4abc type texture if it would weed out all the trifling guys and only bring out all the quality guys.
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Nope, nappy chicks are not immune to attention from ignorant men. I get it all the time. I especially like the ones who think it's acceptable to walk up to me and stick their hands in my hair.
 
this thread is very interesting....


i never really thought about the quality of attention i am getting since i am "taken" but now that you mention it i feel its only "slightly" better when my hair is natural. its definatly more when its relaxed but it is more of the ignorant type and a little of the more suited up brothers.

so i guess my point is i can notice less when natural but it is more quality.
but when u think about it more quality is going to be less anyway. and i still do get quality with straight hair. :confused:

when natural and big i do get the ignorant type usually wanting to know if i am "mixed" or something.
 
LocksOfLuV said:
Are you sure? Because that beautiful head of yours will make ANY gender turn!!:eek: I love it!
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Thanks...i'm always hiding my hair in buns that maybe why i lack attention..there is also another issue which is my WEIGHT and the fact that i'm not confident in myself
 
cocoberry10 said:
Aww, Den. You need to have more confidence. I'm sure lots of guys would love to date you. Maybe you don't even notice the attention!:)
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I'm not really bothered anymore, but i just wanted to reply to the question. In fact i'm in a relationship, but its long distance and he's being an idiot.
 
I think it deends on the guy. But I can say that since ing natural, and maybe it's because I started taking better care of my hair, I get alot more men who will give me a hair compliment, hich never used to happen when I was relaxed. But that happens whether I wear it straight or curly. So I guess the amount of complimentsmight be the same, but I appreciate that now they point of that they like my hair because it's something I've worked for.
 
dkbeauti said:
Since I BC'd back in August, I get even more attention.
Not to say that I'm cute or anything, but this short cut is working in my favor; rocking my kinky/coily TWA shows off my facial features!

I have men approaching me, complimenting me, smiling at me.
Very polite, ya know?
Asking me, "Excuse me, can I talk to you for a minute?" (No, I'm seeing somebody:p ).

I'm not a young girl, but I'm in college (I'm in my 30's).
So the men on campus that speak to me now are like, "How you doin' today, sista?" or " Peace, queen, how you doin' today?"

It wasn't like that before.
When I was wearing my wigs, weaves, and ponytails, guys were allways trying to "holla".:lol: I don't have guys coming at me that way so much anymore.

And the type of males that repond to me have changed.
They are more like the "gentlemen" type.
Even the types that usually "holla" at women ( "Ay, yo shorty, come 'mere, let me holla atchoo for a minute".......), now speak to me with much more respect.


dk
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I second this comment. It's the same way for me:)
 
One of my closest friends that i met in college had midback natural hair (she hardly ever even flat-ironed it) but she kept it braided at night and put her products on it so it stayed looking nice and wavy anyways. For a time, I was wearing a long relaxed-style weave. She got attention and I got attention as well. Also when we would be walking together, no dude would ever say, "I want to talk to the natural one." or "I would like to talk to you, the one with the relaxed hair." Neither one of us was ugly. I think it is about preferences{usually a certain combination of qualities like size, thick, slim, big, bright, dark, tall, short, curvy,clear skin complexion...} I also think if the lady carries herself well (like someone said earlier) and has a pretty face, that matters more to guys... because relaxed hair can be beautiful and natural hair can be beautiful too.
I also think guys like long hair no matter what the texture...as long as it doesn't look a hot crazy mess.:lol: Though some women do look more fierce with short hairstyles and they will get snatched up too looking like Halle Berry, Nia Long, or Jada Pinkett in her younger days. Also, I have noticed that certain women have facial features that pop with curly hair while others have features that pop with straight hair. sorry, don't mean to get far away from the topic so...it's a wrap.
 
IDK about this one. I don't have as much as butt as I did when I had a relaxer(do to fact I wasn't working out then). But I think overall it's about the same. Recently I went to a friends BBQ with two other friends both wearing weaves and me and my wash and go and like so some many have said there was more hello ladies than cat calls. But I will say that when I walked in my hair caught everyone attention if only for a minute. And the way you carry your self makes a huge difference...
 
IDK about this one. I don't have as much as butt as I did when I had a relaxer(do to fact I wasn't working out then). But I think overall it's about the same. Recently I went to a friends BBQ with two other friends both wearing weaves and me and my wash and go and like so some many have said there was more hello ladies than cat calls. But I will say that when I walked in my hair caught everyone attention if only for a minute. And the way you carry your self makes a huge difference...
 
Being nosy, I wanted to see who bumped this thread up from the dungeons.

If you are attractive you will get attention. I do think men love long hair. Ladies like Toni Braxton, Jada and Halle have made it very trendy to have short hair.

I do get attention. I am goin to start rocking a weave soon. It will be interesting to see how the attention changes.
 
I think I've gotten an increase in what-the-heck stares, which I'm sure can't be a good thing.
 
I think it depends on if your style is flattering and hair is healthy. When I was natural, I felt like a man magnet, but I get plenty of attention relaxed too. I think it may also have to do with your environment-like how"progressive" the people are.
 
I find this interesting because I have noticed a difference, I have more men try to talk to me as a natural than a relaxed chick. Especially when I lived in NYC. It was such a difference, and every man that tried to holla complimented me on my hair.
 
Christa438 said:
One of my closest friends that i met in college had midback natural hair (she hardly ever even flat-ironed it) but she kept it braided at night and put her products on it so it stayed looking nice and wavy anyways. For a time, I was wearing a long relaxed-style weave. She got attention and I got attention as well. Also when we would be walking together, no dude would ever say, "I want to talk to the natural one." or "I would like to talk to you, the one with the relaxed hair." Neither one of us was ugly. I think it is about preferences{usually a certain combination of qualities like size, thick, slim, big, bright, dark, tall, short, curvy,clear skin complexion...} I also think if the lady carries herself well (like someone said earlier) and has a pretty face, that matters more to guys... because relaxed hair can be beautiful and natural hair can be beautiful too.
I also think guys like long hair no matter what the texture...as long as it doesn't look a hot crazy mess.:lol: Though some women do look more fierce with short hairstyles and they will get snatched up too looking like Halle Berry, Nia Long, or Jada Pinkett in her younger days. Also, I have noticed that certain women have facial features that pop with curly hair while others have features that pop with straight hair. sorry, don't mean to get far away from the topic so...it's a wrap.
Click to expand...

ITA with your whole post. I don't think it makes one spec of difference, but rather it's the whole package that will turn or not turn a guy's head:yep:
 
Unfortunately, for the men I am around, they like it relaxed. I love natural hair but men love it long and laid down. My SO for instance is a big motivator for me to pay more attention to my hair. I get attention from all kinds of guys but more business men than anything.
 
erin558 said:
I think it depends on your hair type to be honest with you. If you are rockin' a 3b natural then dudes are going to flock because you have "Good hair" but if you are a 4C, you might still get attention but it will be from different guys and not as common, but it really depends on where you are.
Click to expand...

"damn ma you got a nice bod and you got good hair"....

based on that response from (more than one) dude...I have to agree with the above.
 
i had a short weave this summer like posh spice and got mad attention with it. when i wear curly weave i get mad attention. for me personally it don't matter how i have my hair...it's the swagger..the confidence for real.
i use to rock long weave alot and it never differed between that & my halle hairdo
 
In my opinion, black men from non metro cities think it's different and they are interested in trying something new to see "where your head is at"

But in places like ATL, there are plenty of natural ladies so it's not much of a big difference. I think guys tend to treat me with more respect though when they do holla. Some guys say..."Ohh, I like the natural thang girl, so lemme holla" Ummm....Okay???

My sweetie likes my hair poofy. When ever I bring it back from wearing it straight for so long he says, "Yay! I missed the poof!"

But in general, it's all about if your hair is combed or not...haha. Natural or straight, if you style it tight then you're good to go.
 
In MY experience:

I get more attention from everyone in general when I wear my hair hatural or with some texture to it. My husband prefers my hair this way and I also notice I get more attention from men of "other" ethnicities when I show my natural texture.

I got/get more attention from "brothas" when I had a relaxer or now when I wear my hair straight.
 
I get a ton of attention with natural hair a great deal more than I did when I was relaxed (and I got a lot then not to sound big headed or anything:nono:). Honestly I think most men pay attention to what I am carrying behind me than what is on my head, if you know what I mean:lachen:.

Seriously, I have asked men who made comments about my hair when trying to talk to me, what they liked about my hair and they said a huge fluffy afro is sexy, in a bedhead way. There seems to be this raw sensuality connected to natural hair for some men. Others percieve confidience or individuality. I have noticed since I have been natural, a great deal of the riff raff that used to bother me has stopped. Now the only men that aproach me are the confident seemingly intelligent educated types. My guy friend from highschool said my natural hair makes me look deep, earthy and vegetarian (which I am not) and therefore a guy up to no good choses not to waste his time because he does not think he can get it.
 
Originally Posted by erin558
I think it depends on your hair type to be honest with you. If you are rockin' a 3b natural then dudes are going to flock because you have "Good hair" but if you are a 4C, you might still get attention but it will be from different guys and not as common, but it really depends on where you are.
.
Click to expand...
i agree with this
 
I've gotten attention during every hair phase. (Then again I have a big butt so I often wonder how many men even see my hair before admiring, boys will be boys... maybe I should do quats along w/ my hair treatments, j/k :lachen:)

Anyhow, I've been short and long relaxed, and Now I am natural. I took the BC and things didn't change much now that its growing out nicely the men are definitely LOVIN it! One thing I did notice was that I got a HUGE increase in attention from white men when I went natural (for whatever reason). I do believe my quality definitely increasedd when I went natural. Not as many shawtys, whoadies, dope boys and the like. I should probably add that I lived in Houston (not as much attention), ATL, and now DC. These are cities w/ HIGH AA populations so that could play a factor (or not...)

All in all, I think there are many men that may that prefer long relaxed hair, however, by and by I believe it is about attitude. I have seen long-relaxed hair lovers go CRAZY over bald women b/c she was fierce!!! So as long as you rock whatever do you have like its the HOTESS thing going it should matter. Men are attracted to well kept women of all shapes, sizes, and hairstyles who possess CONFIDENCE!!!
 
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For me,

I get more attention when my hair is longer. Since it never really got longer than 6 inches while I was relaxed, I get way more attention now.

I currently have between 12-15 inches of hair.

But most of that attention comes when it is loose.

  1. My dh can't keep his hands out of it. We are in a couple of church gorups together. the last itme my hair was loose, he constantly had his hands in it. Massaging my scalp and just mushing my hair between his fingers. In Sunday service at church, a friend of mine who was sitting behind us tease that my dh and my hair need to get a room, the way he was playing in it so much.
  2. People in general want to touch it and revel in its non-greasy softness. The responses that I get from those whom I do let touch it are almost orgasmic in a way. OOOH, and AWWWWWW, and MMMMMM. You know what I mean.
  3. I went to get my driver's license renewed and the fine brother behind the counter giving me my tests started out calling me queen. I know I didn't ace the sight or roadsign test. I even argued my way through a couple of them. Hey, I know what they mean, just not the actual names. He let me pass, when I know my score was questionable. Usre I had some cleavage showing and I was dressed nicely, but he wasn't really staring at my chest (44DDD, it's hard not to look). He complimented my hair at least 5 times. And had that orgasmic look on his face, like he was dreaming about it or something. He told me he knew my new picture would be slamming (Umm, my old picture was of me with 3 inches of relaxed hair in a pseudo Halle Berry cut).
  4. The chef at the sushi counter gave me some extra sushi on the house. I love a spider roll, so I ordered it. He said he had something he knew I would love. And gave me an additional roll. Mind you, I go to this place all the time,but with my hair in mini braids. But on this occasion, I had my hair loose, just pulled back off my forehead with a very nice scarf.
  5. I get looks of haterade from women when my hair is loose. I don't get those when it is braided up. I think people think my hair is extensions when it is braided.
I am dark-skinned, overweight with 4b,c,d,q,z hair. My hiar is not wavy, or curly, or what is considered "GOOD HAIR".

I believe that people respond to the fact that it is dark and healthy and shiny and soft and thick and long and loose. It's all over the place and wild and passionate and sexual and vibrant. And that is how I feel when I wear this way.
 
I get so much more attention now that I am natural, especially when I wear my fro big and chunky.:grin: I went out to a club last weekend and three different men whispered in my ear how much they love my hair. Now that I think about it I get more attention from men and women. Women have stopped me in the bathroom, on the MARTA and in the mall to ask about my hair.:rolleyes:
 
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