I agree that some (most?) men tend to see themselves and/or their status reflected in their woman's looks (a la the term "trophy wife"). Hence many of them are vain in the sense that they tend to want women who most approach the current standard of beauty (whatever that might be)...And I'd agree that right now, despite the promising grassroots natural hair movement afoot in many of the major coastal cities, the mainstream image for a "beautiful" woman (white, black or any other 'race') still includes straight hair (a. la. Tyra, Beyonce, Oprah, Michelle O etc.).
BUT, there is a silver lining. Natural hair can be seen as a filter for such shallow superficial men. They simply won't approach you. Thus you won't even have to wonder if they're really into you, or just into your looks (i.e. you won't have to worry about them one day leaving you and/or cheating with another younger/prettier woman). That opens more space for REAL, more deep thinking guys with whom a quality, profound, long lasting relationship is more likely. Seems like a good deal to me! ...
The rub is, IMHO, the fact that we desperately need to increase the numbers of that second category of men. We have to start raising our sons to critique/resist that whole "male status" dynamic...After all, we women are the "hands that rock the cradle"! So on some level, the tendancy towards superficality among our men starts with us (and could end with us too)!...But I guess that would mean that we'd have to purge our OWN superficial tendancies for that to really work! LOL!
Peace.