I do think it would be harder for women who are the breadwinners in the family to submit to their husbands. Not impossible just a little more difficult.
I know I may get stoned for saying this but to me, submission is not saying that a woman is less than the man. I know plenty of women who to me are submissive women and their place is right beside their men, no where behind him.
I think the word submission is seen as so derogatory when in fact it isnt that. The bible tells men to love their wives like God loves the church and women submit to their husbands. I think if a husband is truly loving his wife like God loves the church then the art of submission would not seem so bad. The problem comes in when men arent doing their part or are not mature enough to handle a relationship like that. I find that a lot of me take the submission topic and see it as an excuse to act like Hitler. When women cant trust that their men always have their best interest at heart and are truly loving them holding nothing back, the respect goes and the submission is impossible.
Personally, I dont like weak men. I dont want someone I can walk all over but I sure am not dealing with anyone who will try to walk all over me. In my eyes subission doesnt mean walking behind him but walking beside him in the reverence and esteem he and God will bring me.
Here are some definitions for submissive:
sub·mis·sive –adjective 1.inclined or ready to submit; unresistingly or humbly obedient: submissive servants. 2.marked by or indicating submission: a submissive reply.
—Related forms sub·mis·sive·ly, adverb
sub·mis·sive·ness, noun
—Synonyms
1. tractable, compliant, pliant, amenable.
2. passive, resigned, patient, docile, tame, subdued.
—Antonyms
1. rebellious, disobedient.
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.
American Heritage Dictionary -
Cite This Source
submissive
adjective1. inclined or willing to submit to orders or wishes of others or showing such inclination; "submissive servants"; "a submissive reply"; "replacing troublemakers with more submissive people" [ant:
domineering] 2. abjectly submissive; characteristic of a slave or servant; "slavish devotion to her job ruled her life"; "a slavish yes-man to the party bosses"- S.H.Adams; "she has become submissive and subservient" [syn:
slavish]
Here are some definitions for submit:
1.to give over or yield to the power or authority of another (often used reflexively). 2.to subject to some kind of treatment or influence. 3.to present for the approval, consideration, or decision of another or others: to submit a plan; to submit an application. 4.to state or urge with deference; suggest or propose (usually fol. by a clause): I submit that full proof should be required. –verb (used without object) 5.to yield oneself to the power or authority of another: to submit to a conqueror. 6.to allow oneself to be subjected to some kind of treatment: to submit to chemotherapy. 7.to defer to another's judgment, opinion, decision, etc.: I submit to your superior judgment.
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I guess that I could be submissive when it comes to certain things. Like I have a hard time making a decision on certain matters, particularly when it comes to money and finances. And I would need to defer to my husband/partner if he is good at making those kinds of decisions. So in that sense, I could submit because I would respect the fact he is far superior when it comes to that. But in other areas, he would have to defer/submit to me where I am stronger than he.
I think that many of our modern churches have a different idea on what "submission" means. This is simply my opinion. I think that many churches, particularly black fundamentalist churches (Christian, Muslim, Orthodox, etc.), still cling to traditional meaning of "submissive" in that: (1) women must be silent in church; (2) women are to "submit" (read: serve) their husbands and be obedient to them; (3) men are to serve and be obedient to the church. I think in the traditional/conservative sense, most people take "submissive" to mean that the women is in fact a servant of the head of the household (the man). I also believe that most people take this in the literal sense, especially men. Sadly some men abuse this literal interpretation of the scriptures and use it to justify mistreatment and abuse towards women and children. I remember a good friend of mine whose husband beat her repeatedly when he thought she wasn't being obedient. He beat her so badly and treated her like his slave until she finally got out of that situation. To this day, she blames herself. He had successfully planted in her head that she lives to serve men in her life, and she is psychologically and emotionally damaged from that way of thinking.
?)and women today feel the pressure to comply out of pressure or fear. IMO the black church is reinforcing this philosphy to black womens detriment & it keeping women inferrior.
I guess for me, I need a better understanding for what these newly-existing roles are for both men and women. It is true that many women now work outside the home and are no longer confined to the domestic sphere. Are you suggesting that this new reality may lead to conflicts between men and women in the home where men aren't allowed to maintain their traditional roles because now both men/women work outside the home? Is there are conflicts due to these societal changes, what can be done about them. Most women I know who work outside the home do so because they have to. It now requires two incomes to make ends meet for a lot of working families. I do sometimes wonder how this impact families as a whole. I guess it was so much easier in my grandmothers' day because the roles were already clearly defined: the woman stayed at home with the kids and was the housewife, the male worked outside the home and was the primary breadwinner. This is no longer the case. How that impacts families would be a very interesting issue to ponder.
