So I weave checked my little cousin last night...

[ManeStreet]

Try not to compare yourself to other people. Its pointless just do you. For some people hair growth isn't as difficult. I've had long hair all my life, I retain every inch that comes out my head. I can get to mbl and bsl without any effort, beyond that takes more dedication. But my nails, thin as hell! Lol. I have the worst nails ever, they break and split if I look at them. There's people I know with nails so thick and strong. All this to say, everybody has their areas of shortcomings. That's life.

 

[godzooki]

I don't mind being weave checked by family and friends as long as they're pleasant about it and not thinking they're going to put me on blast but strangers/acquaintances thinking to do it give me the creeps. When I was working part time and out of the blue wore my hair down one of my bosses came up to me and goes "Oh your hair is so pretty, you never wear it down!" and then right in front of customers starts running her fingers thru my scalp. I mean her nails were scratching down my scalp from top to bottom, lol! My first thought was not unlike how I felt when getting a gynecological exam. Hello! The surprised look on her face was worth it though because she had obviously been expecting something else.

 

[beauti]

If her hair is in the 3s that explains why her hair grew with no effort.

 

[kblc06]

I just say what I feel lol regardless of the controversy behind it sometimes you just look at stuff and are like "be serious". I never said I had type 3 hair but isn't it a known fact that the least tight of a curl you have the easier it is for natural oils to moisturize your stands etc etc. type 3s are usually bsl by year 3 someone show me a 4 like that.

I'm believe Sera & Mwedzi, as well as Happily Me are all types 4s who've made it to WL in 3-4 years. They've far surpassed me and I'm a mostly a type 3

 

[appplecidder]

If her hair is in the 3s that explains why her hair grew with no effort.

Agrees runs out forum..

Sent from my MB200 using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[appplecidder]

My bad 3 hair takes just as much work to retain length as 4 :| believe it or not all hair isn't created equal.

Hahahah

Sent from my MB200 using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[appplecidder]

I just say what I feel lol regardless of the controversy behind it sometimes you just look at stuff and are like "be serious". I never said I had type 3 hair but isn't it a known fact that the least tight of a curl you have the easier it is for natural oils to moisturize your stands etc etc. type 3s are usually bsl by year 3 someone show me a 4 like that.

You going in damn... 4 can do it too but have to work for it.. 3 it's just handed to them like "here's your long hair you don't have to do anything to it no deep conditioning or moisturizing".

Sent from my MB200 using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[SerenavanderWoodsen]

!!

 

[ManeStreet]

I just wonder if people agree that some people grow thick, strong, long nails with little to no effort and some people don't? So why is there so much uproar and defensiveness if someone states an opinion that some people grow thick, strong, long hair with little to no effort and some people don't?
I had a roommate in college from hong kong. In about 6 months her hair grew from neck length to hip length (she washed and blowdryed everyday) and a friend of mine in high school did the same thing. She was chin length in September and tbl length by spring. It was so amazing to me. I was like wow. During the same time I had gone from apl to mbl with minimal effort which is good growth for me. So if someone was to say that their hair grows more easily than mine, I'm not offended or defensive. Its true I saw it myself. That doesn't mean I'm saying their hair is "good" and my hair is "bad", its just stating the facts of what took place. And if me and friend both cut our nails down to stubs at the same time and a week later she has a full set of thick shiney nails and mine are split and catching the fibers of my clothing. It doesn't mean her nails are "good" and my nails are "bad", they are just different.

 

[HeavenlySkies]

You going in damn... 4 can do it too but have to work for it.. 3 it's just handed to them like "here's your long hair you don't have to do anything to it no deep conditioning or moisturizing".

That's what I'm saying. I love it when people act as if type 4 hair is as easy to grow/retain as the looser types like c'mon son! Everyone wants to be politically correct while incorrect. I'm sure there are a FEW exceptions to the rule but look at the majority of updates on here. Chicks (3s) have gone bald and within 6 months have passed my length when I've been at it over triple the amount of time. I'm sure some 3s have to do a little something and it's not COMPLETELY effortless but to make it seem like it's remotely in the same ballpark is a smack in the face for real ​

 

[BostonMaria]

You going in damn... 4 can do it too but have to work for it.. 3 it's just handed to them like "here's your long hair you don't have to do anything to it no deep conditioning or moisturizing".

Sent from my MB200 using Long Hair Care Forum App

I'm 3C and I was SL for like 20 yrs! No lie! My regimen was all wrong and I was frying my hair every weekend. I think the regimen has alot to do with how much you'll retain. It took me 3 1/2 yrs to get to WL but only after I changed all my bad habits.


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF

 

[Janet']

OP...Seems like you are trying to compare apples (her hair) to oranges (yours)...Don't!!! And don't be ashamed because your hair is WL either...You'll get there, but I do understand why you would feel envious...We are all human after all!

 

[aniyashair]

Like seriously you expect her cousin to slap her or something, OP I don't even know why you felt the need to explain yourself.

Just take this as a wake up call to start getting serious about your hair's length.

people like her is the reason why alot of people dont even want to post. We are here to share our ideas, concerns, and emotional outbursts. What ever it is lets just give eachother good advice and stay positive.

 

[Aviah]

beauti

OMG! I think I love you for that gif!

 

[Papoose]

OP: I feel your pain! I am a fine, dense, 4B, very pourous. I am so envious of those folks that can do NOTHING to their hair and lap me with growth. it's so frustrating!!! I'm on the phone with my BF now. She can do anything to her hair and get mad growth! She jokes about snapping combs. She's lurking on this site as we speak. We just have different hair. She's a 4B, but she's not fine. I think she's medium or thick.

As for my hair, I haven't retained much this past year. I really think I need to hide my hair all together to have great retention. My hair is only collarbone length. I think I may need to cut too. Not trim, cut. I may cut it, braid it and start over. I guess I'm saying this to say that you're not alone. There are a lot of people that will support you in your journey...if you allow them to. You can rant to me anytime!

 

[OsnapCnapp!]

nappystorm: I feel like you! Wow, getting weave-checked is an insult, lol. But hey, some ppl take it differently, I guess you and I are just exceptions! When my sis in NY weave-checked me I was like yeah that's right, my hair looks so good it looks unreal! HA! But hey......ppl get offended too. erplexed I guess they approach it as "oh that can't be all her hair she don't look mixed" or something but I usually try to approach things on a positive tips....usually
softblackcotton: check the siggy girl. I know EXACTLY what you mean about uneven growth....believe me. But since I have been doing very very low manipulation, weekly DCs, moisture spritz, and the GHE....my hair has been thriving and has grown out so much. I hate heat and do it once a year....if that. You can have nice long hair and you will you know the basics of natural hair upkeep the thing is just finding a regimen and sticking with it. But you will though, I know it!

 

[softblackcotton]

@softblackcotton: check the siggy girl. I know EXACTLY what you mean about uneven growth....believe me. But since I have been doing very very low manipulation, weekly DCs, moisture spritz, and the GHE....my hair has been thriving and has grown out so much. I hate heat and do it once a year....if that. You can have nice long hair and you will you know the basics of natural hair upkeep the thing is just finding a regimen and sticking with it. But you will though, I know it!

OsnapCnapp!

you're hair looks great! those are some nice thick twists. What is the GHE?

 

[OsnapCnapp!]

@OsnapCnapp!

you're hair looks great! those are some nice thick twists. What is the GHE?

Oh, GHE is Greenhouse effect. This youtuber I've been following for a while, MeekaJael, does it and has a challenge going on her site. It takes some getting used to but it's beneficial for your hair in the long run.

Oh and thank u for your comment! Im working on getting this head healthy, lol.

 

[ebonylocs]

OP, I think you should really try protective styling, if you're serious about growing out your hair. Braids (e.g. crown and glory method) and wigs might be a good idea, if your hair is not long enough to bun. Please get over your shame of having someone braid your uneven hair. The braider probably won't even notice or care. The key for me when I grew out my natural hair was low manipulation, protective styling, and DC at least every 2 weeks.

It is an unfair fact of life that some people grow and retain hair easier than others. They might have faster growth rates or often it's simply because they have stronger hair that doesn't break off as easily. If my mother / sister were to be as gentle and protective with their hair as I am with mine, they would probably have waist-length hair. As others mentioned the same unfairness is applicable to high metabolism/slimness, clear skin, strong, fast-growing nails, etc etc.

OK, I know that people only seem get offended by being weave checked. I believe they only act offended on the surface, however, not so deep down inside they are flattered that their hair looks nice enough that some people may think it is weave. I believe that is the MAIN reason that people even post about being "weave-checked" so that they could boast that they their hair looks so long and nice, it looks too good to be true. That is also similar to those threads about people asking if they are mixed, saying that they have "good" hair, etc. People only pretend to be offended, but they are really flattered by it.

That's a lot of mind-reading and assuming going on. Because my own integrity is very important to me, I usually take what people tell me on good faith. It would be very presumptuous and speculative to go around imputing motives and my own thought processes to other people, contrary to their own words, unless they have done something to show me different.

As for me, being weave-checked is an insult. If you want to know if my hair is real or not, just ask me and I will tell you the truth. It is an insult to think that I will lie to you, and therefore you have to conduct your own "investigation". As a matter of fact, the times when I was weave-checked the person asked me, I answered, and *still* they did the weave check. That's basically calling me a liar.

I just say what I feel lol regardless of the controversy behind it sometimes you just look at stuff and are like "be serious". I never said I had type 3 hair but isn't it a known fact that the least tight of a curl you have the easier it is for natural oils to moisturize your stands etc etc. type 3s are usually bsl by year 3 someone show me a 4 like that.

I know it's not PC to say on here, but I agree with you that *generally speaking* type 3s have an easier time retaining length. That's because they tend to have stronger, more elastic strands and fewer tangles, so combing, brushing, etc. doesn't cause as much mechanical damage and breakage. But a type 3 with thin, weak strands may have a harder time retaining length than a type 4 with strong strands. And I am a type 4 that when natural defintely dmade BSL (straightened) in 3 years, with very low mani and a lot of protective styling.

 

[ebonylocs]

I also should add that hair forums are not the key to hair growth. They are plenty of black women growing long hair who have never even heard of a hair forum. Many of the ladies at my work place have fairly long, healthy hair that manages to always look sleek and well-groomed to boot (no no-combing / baggying / protective styling / air-drying for them!). Sometimes I look at them and wonder what my hair would be like if, like them, I would just go the salon for a relaxer every 6 weeks and for a wash every 2 or 3 weeks and call it a day.

 

[crr0121]

I understand how you feel. But I just wanted to add that being natural does not automatically make your hair strong and fast growing. Is your hair stronger than it would've been with a relaxer or hair color? Probably yes. But let's not forget that natural hair can get dry and break still. I say double check your protein/moisture balance, pH balance, deep conditioning methods and manipulation. You say your hair breaks easily and after 11 years of being natural, I can see how the expectations of retention could be high even with slow growth. It definitely sounds like a breakage problem. Just find the root of the problem. Although your cousin isn't on any hair forums, she may know more than you think about hair care or she may be happening to do things (like wigs as ps) and just notices that it works so she sticks with what works for her.

 

[chicha]

Why did you weave check her? That was rude.

At the original poster I'm not mad at you because it wasn't my hair

Oh that STEAMS ME I can't stand with another woman goes past my personal space, doesn't ask to touch me, and tests to see if I have added something as personal as a weave. WTF? Thats like testing to see if I have breasts implants. Nothing on me is up for public touching and the fact you would be so RUDE as to let me know that you want to find out my secret (or not) by doing it without asking makes me want to beat the ish out of you.

It's like they say I don't care what she thinks I'm going to check anyway. And it's your body!!!

Next time I'm going off!

 

[chicha]

lol I know I would have lol but I nor anyone I know are uptight about touching hair....unless it's a total stranger...then it get's kind of weird

@LaFemmeNaturelle That poster wasn't rude because she was entitled to her opinion and the original poster asked for it.

Seriously that was very rude for calling her so when she didn't ask you anything. Hey I'm just being real.

And I know TONS, TONS of females who complains about this. I even know an attorney who lost her professional demeanor over a sista who "weaved checked" her.

Bet that sista won't weave check another.

That is none of anyone's business. And you nor I nor anyone else has the right to invade on a person's privacy like that. When you are talking anything personal and you don't ask, you are invading. And being bold to think I'll do it anyway.

Just a word of caution for you because I know someone who's arm was hit weave checkin in someone elses head and it was funny as hayal! I know she was embarrassed because I could see it on her face. Embarrassed because she wanted to embarrass another woman. Next time someone weave checks me so they can go back and discuss what I have in my head, I'm embarrassing the ish out of them.

And she will be yet another who won't be weave checking any more.

 

[blueberryd]

Maybe u need to take a good multivitamin and an iron supplement (take separately)...ido find it odd that in 11 years u've only made it to CBL ... I would lay off any type of tight braid or cornrows for a while...and mayb protective style w/ buns or wigs...mayb that was 1 secret to ur cousins hair growth--mayb wearing wigs/half wigs helped her retain...annnnnd i recommend pre-pooing to every1--preferably with ORS replenish pack...for me, it reallly helps w/ detangling...hhj

 

[Duff]

Maybe u need to take a good multivitamin and an iron supplement (take separately)...ido find it odd that in 11 years u've only made it to CBL ... I would lay off any type of tight braid or cornrows for a while...and mayb protective style w/ buns or wigs...mayb that was 1 secret to ur cousins hair growth--mayb wearing wigs/half wigs helped her retain...annnnnd i recommend pre-pooing to every1--preferably with ORS replenish pack...for me, it reallly helps w/ detangling...hhj

I agree with this entire post. If I'm not mistaken, OP you said earlier that you have splits that go up to the middle of your strand. IMO, I also think you need to cut it to even it out and get rid of the damaged strands and stay committed to learning and providing what your hair needs.

for the most part, when people 'weave check' you, it's only to assure themselves and their own insecurities. the 'weave checker' is feeding into their own insecurities and hoping that is not all your hair so they can feel better about themselvs. just as OP stated, she could not believe that her cousins hair grew in that length of time. it would have made her feel better about her own hair journey if it would have been a weave.

 

[niqu92]

OP maybe you should try braids again,back when i was natural i constantly wore braids and my hair thrived however i treated the braids as if my hair wasnt in braids. I shampooed once a week,i DC'd once a week, i always moisturized my scalp with coconut oil, and i moisturized every day