SMH at our own misconceptions about our hair

[NikNik79]

I was listening to the Steve Harvey radio show this morning and a male rep from Dark and Lovely was on promoting a contest that they are sponsoring. Well, I was getting ready to get out of the car when a woman called in and asked if D&L carried any hair growth products because her hair would only grow to about shoulder length and stop. Of course when I heard that question I sat and waited for an answer. Well, the gentlemen told her that she would not be able to grow her hair any longer because she had reached her maximum length. He then said that she should instead focus on moisturizing and conditioning her hair to keep it healthy (a point which I definitely agree with).

See the thing is, I used to believe this same misconception about black hair and my hair has never grown longer than a little past shoulder length. I would then get bored with it and would either cut it or cause it to break off from coloring, daily flat ironing, and not moisturizing it. Once I found LHCF and saw all of these lovely heads of hair both natural and relaxed, it gave me a new outlook on my hair and now I'm on my quest to APL and beyond

I just had to share this with you ladies because I know that this is a common misconception about black hair and I hate the fact that the lady was discouraged from trying to grow her hair. It makes me wish that more women knew about this website because my hair is healthier than it has ever been!

 

[Kurlee]

Yes it bugs me too. There is NOTHING wrong with black people why our hair can't grow like everyone elses. I refuse to believe that ur DNA says ur black, halt at 9 inches of hair.

 

[Sui Topi]

When I told my hater sister about my transitioning plan, and that when my hair was between apl and bsl, i would start trimming off relaxer as it grew in, she laughed and was like "you think your hair is going to grow to apl?" she even said "you probably dont have to cut it because your hair will fall off the ends like how a snake sheds its skin" i was like "whaaaaat are you talking about guy?" where did she get this maaaaad idea from?! anyway...I had my last relaxer early October and I was SL, I slowly noticed my hair was APL if I pulled it to the front armpit, and then a while ago when I co washed, I felt my hair tickling me somewhere I havent felt it in a few years..I wouldnt claim APL because its juuuuust touching it in the V part of my hair in the back, but in the next couple months, maybe even next month Ill be there! Im hiding it from her though..In the last week of March when I have my sons birthday, then I'll flat iron it and she can see. She had bleached her hair in the same week that I permed it, and I told her that for her hair to survive shes going to have to be extra vigilant with the moisture and everything, and I gave her some of my products, but she doesnt listen...her hair is quite mash up now...but eh...and it was a friend of hers that referred me to this site ages ago who went through a bc but now has I think MBL..if not MBL, a full BSL, and my sister calls her dumb and hair obsessed. Some people never learn!....**end of rant**

 

[NikNik79]

I know what you mean. You will have to just show her your growth and then she'll see the light. My son thinks that I'm obsessed and rolls his eyes when it notices that I'm on this site. My sister won't listen either, even when she asked me "what have you been doing to your hair, it looks nice and healthy." Like people say you can show 'em better than you can tell 'em.

 

[locabouthair]

I was listening to the Steve Harvey radio show this morning and a male rep from Dark and Lovely was on promoting a contest that they are sponsoring. Well, I was getting ready to get out of the car when a woman called in and asked if D&L carried any hair growth products because her hair would only grow to about shoulder length and stop. Of course when I heard that question I sat and waited for an answer. Well, the gentlemen told her that she would not be able to grow her hair any longer because she had reached her maximum length. He then said that she should instead focus on moisturizing and conditioning her hair to keep it healthy (a point which I definitely agree with).

See the thing is, I used to believe this same misconception about black hair and my hair has never grown longer than a little past shoulder length. I would then get bored with it and would either cut it or cause it to break off from coloring, daily flat ironing, and not moisturizing it. Once I found LHCF and saw all of these lovely heads of hair both natural and relaxed, it gave me a new outlook on my hair and now I'm on my quest to APL and beyond

I just had to share this with you ladies because I know that this is a common misconception about black hair and I hate the fact that the lady was discouraged from trying to grow her hair. It makes me wish that more women knew about this website because my hair is healthier than it has ever been!

I agree but this is 2008, most people who have a healthy problem or any type of issue research it on the net. That's what i did. I knew I was having problems with my hair so I looked for answers. I think people don't even try because they feel that their hair can never be healthy and long because they're black

I really can't believe he told her that she reached her terminal length.
I really hate how ignorant we are about our hair. My own mother does this then I tell her my hair will be APL. She's gonna eat her words one day.

 

[Fine 4s]

When I told my hater sister about my transitioning plan, and that when my hair was between apl and bsl, i would start trimming off relaxer as it grew in, she laughed and was like "you think your hair is going to grow to apl?" she even said "you probably dont have to cut it because your hair will fall off the ends like how a snake sheds its skin" i was like "whaaaaat are you talking about guy?" where did she get this maaaaad idea from?! anyway...I had my last relaxer early October and I was SL, I slowly noticed my hair was APL if I pulled it to the front armpit, and then a while ago when I co washed, I felt my hair tickling me somewhere I havent felt it in a few years..I wouldnt claim APL because its juuuuust touching it in the V part of my hair in the back, but in the next couple months, maybe even next month Ill be there! Im hiding it from her though..In the last week of March when I have my sons birthday, then I'll flat iron it and she can see. She had bleached her hair in the same week that I permed it, and I told her that for her hair to survive shes going to have to be extra vigilant with the moisture and everything, and I gave her some of my products, but she doesnt listen...her hair is quite mash up now...but eh...and it was a friend of hers that referred me to this site ages ago who went through a bc but now has I think MBL..if not MBL, a full BSL, and my sister calls her dumb and hair obsessed. Some people never learn!....**end of rant**

OK, so I'm going to be on the lookout for your post in March! I can't wait to hear the reaction. You go guuuuuuuuuurl!

 

[MizAvalon]

I don't even want to think about how many thousands of women probably heard that broadcast and are thinking "See, I knew that black hair would only grow so far".

Thanks a lot D&L rep. You just set goodness knows how many women back.

 

[AvaSpeaks]

Yes it bugs me too. There is NOTHING wrong with black people why our hair can't grow like everyone elses. I refuse to believe that ur DNA says ur black, halt at 9 inches of hair.

Maybe I have a big or long head but 9 inches on me will be just to the end of my face.

13-14 inches on me is around my collarbone.

 

[Saida]

the funny thing is that, it wont go past shoulder lenght, but then again you always have new growth hmm, that must mean that the hair dosent grow, and funny that is should be shoulder length that the hair stops, maybe brakeage??? thats really what I beleive it is, I think we grow hair just as much as everybody else. our hair is just more fragile, and I think if we just protect our ends more, and use some gentle care with our hair, it would be just as long as everybody elses hair

 

[NYAmicas]

That's terrible that a rep from Dark and Lovely actually said this. I wish I wasnt in class because I would have blasted that out of the water. I used to think my hair wouldnt or couldnt grow past my shoulder but I started to do my own research and learned how to take proper care of my hair and it is thriving. Some professionals really claim that our hair cant or just doesnt grow that long.SMH.
I agree with what the above poster said about our hair just not reaching its full potential more often due to damage.

 

[AvaSpeaks]

the funny thing is that, it wont go past shoulder lenght, but then again you always have new growth hmm, that must mean that the hair dosent grow, and funny that is should be shoulder length that the hair stops, maybe brakeage??? thats really what I beleive it is, I think we grow hair just as much as everybody else. our hair is just more fragile, and I think if we just protect our ends more, and use some gentle care with our hair, it would be just as long as everybody elses hair

I also believe that we can get our hair much further than the traditional Neck Length or SL that so many sistas seem to fall into.

And another thing. Sistas need to stop listening to MEN about how to care for and grow our hair What the hell do they know? They can get hair pretty much down there back sleeping on cotton pillowcases and doing nothing to their hair. Yet we can't! For us, it takes extra care, gentle care and patience.

Unless they are female, more importantly a sista, MOST importantly a sista from LHCF, then I don't want to hear their "advice".

 

[kuwait]

I totally agree with you!!! I have always felt that God is no respector of person's, and if every other race is blessed with long beautiful hair, then we should be too!!!

 

[AvaSpeaks]

I totally agree with you!!! I have always felt that God is no respector of person's, and if every other race is blessed with long beautiful hair, then we should be too!!!

Totally off topic, but is that the Black Canary in your avatar Kuwait?

 

[tiffers]

OK, so I'm going to be on the lookout for your post in March! I can't wait to hear the reaction. You go guuuuuuuuuurl!

Yeah, I'll be waiting too

When you show her, be sure to take a picture, so we can see the crunched look on her face

 

[mzhotniz86]

I was listening to the Steve Harvey radio show this morning and a male rep from Dark and Lovely was on promoting a contest that they are sponsoring. Well, I was getting ready to get out of the car when a woman called in and asked if D&L carried any hair growth products because her hair would only grow to about shoulder length and stop. Of course when I heard that question I sat and waited for an answer. Well, the gentlemen told her that she would not be able to grow her hair any longer because she had reached her maximum length. He then said that she should instead focus on moisturizing and conditioning her hair to keep it healthy (a point which I definitely agree with).

See the thing is, I used to believe this same misconception about black hair and my hair has never grown longer than a little past shoulder length. I would then get bored with it and would either cut it or cause it to break off from coloring, daily flat ironing, and not moisturizing it. Once I found LHCF and saw all of these lovely heads of hair both natural and relaxed, it gave me a new outlook on my hair and now I'm on my quest to APL and beyond

I just had to share this with you ladies because I know that this is a common misconception about black hair and I hate the fact that the lady was discouraged from trying to grow her hair. It makes me wish that more women knew about this website because my hair is healthier than it has ever been!

omg! girl i heard this too!! i could not believe he said that. i started to find the number and call in and correct his arse. its bad that a rep for a reputable hair company is misinforming people about hair care.i didnt bother listening to the rest of the show , but i wanted to call so bad!! i also didnt know if that session was prerecorded or not. another thought also crossed my mind, and i started thinking about all the hair companies (geared towards us) who have NO clue about hair care. the ones that tell you their product does this and that, but they actually dont even know what they are talking about at all.

 

[shocol]

I don't even want to think about how many thousands of women probably heard that broadcast and are thinking "See, I knew that black hair would only grow so far".

Thanks a lot D&L rep. You just set goodness knows how many women back.

IA...It's bad enough hearing what individuals think about our hair, but it really makes me mad when those who have influence perpetuate the lies. That Dark and Lovely rep should be ashamed of himself, first for being ignorant and so willing to let it show. He's peddling products that actually have to chemically damage your hair just for them to work. Tell me again, why he gets to be a guru on black hair. As one of my close friends says, 'The devil is a LIAR.'


ETA...LHCF and other hair forums should really bombard Steve Harvey with comments and letters to call this dude out. Shouldn't let this go by unchallenged.

 

[AvaSpeaks]

But you know what, pretty much all of the D&L models have hair to their SL.

I rarely see any APL models in their ads, so maybe they are only pushing what they truly believe and know.

Maybe they only believe that our hair can grow that long. Their models certainly reflect the length that the rep was saying our hair can only grow to. Ignorance is as ignorance does.

 

[shocol]

I totally agree with you!!! I have always felt that God is no respector of person's, and if every other race is blessed with long beautiful hair, then we should be too!!!

Thank you...people act like there was a deliberate decision made for black women to not have long hair. Instead of the much simpler solution that 75 percent of AA women have chemically processed hair and the majority of us have not mastered how to properly care for it. More than any other race of women in the US, we do not know how to care for our natural hair.

 

[Misseyl]

I wonder how many beauty supply companies would be out of business if black women start growing out their hair? Ok, let me see, no more
wigs, hair pieces, weaves, pony phony, blow dryers, overnight magic potions, grease, hair dyes -- there are more, but I can't think of them right now.

 

[Kurlee]

Maybe I have a big or long head but 9 inches on me will be just to the end of my face.

13-14 inches on me is around my collarbone.

On my head, nine inches is:
from nape --> apl
from crown-->end of neck
from sides-->collarbone
from bangs-->between chin and chest

I dunno on my head 12-13 inches is apl and 18 is like mb/bsl. This is an approximation though. I was just tryna say that the thinking is flawed that because we are black our hair can only grow to touch our shoulders, like theres something wrong with our hair or our bodies. If our hair didn't grow why do we need touchups so often and stylist tell u not to strech

 

[locabouthair]

I wonder how many beauty supply companies would be out of business if black women start growing out their hair? Ok, let me see, no more
wigs, hair pieces, weaves, pony phony, blow dryers, overnight magic potions, grease, hair dyes -- there are more, but I can't think of them right now.

hmm good point. The weave companies are making lots of money from us.

 

[PinkSkates]

Originally posted by shocol
Thank you...people act like there was a deliberate decision made for black women to not have long hair. Instead of the much simpler solution that 75 percent of AA women have chemically processed hair and the majority of us have not mastered how to properly care for it. More than any other race of women in the US, we do not know how to care for our natural hair.

This is soooooooooooooo true !!!

 

[Maynard]

I think that you should write into the show and advise that they are giving incorrect info. You dont have to reference this site, but you should put that the rep was giving incorrect info.

 

[Songbirdb]

I was listening to the Steve Harvey radio show this morning and a male rep from Dark and Lovely was on promoting a contest that they are sponsoring. Well, I was getting ready to get out of the car when a woman called in and asked if D&L carried any hair growth products because her hair would only grow to about shoulder length and stop. Of course when I heard that question I sat and waited for an answer. Well, the gentlemen told her that she would not be able to grow her hair any longer because she had reached her maximum length. He then said that she should instead focus on moisturizing and conditioning her hair to keep it healthy (a point which I definitely agree with).

See the thing is, I used to believe this same misconception about black hair and my hair has never grown longer than a little past shoulder length. I would then get bored with it and would either cut it or cause it to break off from coloring, daily flat ironing, and not moisturizing it. Once I found LHCF and saw all of these lovely heads of hair both natural and relaxed, it gave me a new outlook on my hair and now I'm on my quest to APL and beyond

I just had to share this with you ladies because I know that this is a common misconception about black hair and I hate the fact that the lady was discouraged from trying to grow her hair. It makes me wish that more women knew about this website because my hair is healthier than it has ever been!

If I would've heard this I would've had to call in and debate with him. He got that poor girl thinking her hair is meant to stay one length. Thats so messed up. It's sad that these Hair Care Places are giving us the rep and making the uninformed believe they can't achieve long hair. Its a sad sad day. It was a black guy huh?

 

[AvaSpeaks]

On my head, nine inches is:
from nape --> apl
from crown-->end of neck
from sides-->collarbone
from bangs-->between chin and chest

I dunno on my head 12-13 inches is apl and 18 is like mb/bsl. This is an approximation though. I was just tryna say that the thinking is flawed that because we are black our hair can only grow to touch our shoulders, like theres something wrong with our hair or our bodies. If our hair didn't grow why do we need touchups so often and stylist tell u not to strech

Really?? erplexed Maybe I am measuring my hair wrong, lol!

 

[AvaSpeaks]

If I would've heard this I would've had to call in and debate with him. He got that poor girl thinking her hair is meant to stay one length. Thats so messed up. It's sad that these Hair Care Places are giving us the rep and making the uninformed believe they can't achieve long hair. Its a sad sad day. It was a black guy huh?

That's exactly why I posted earlier that we shouldn't take hair care advice from men. Most of the time, they don't know what they are talking about. Even if they are "stylists"

 

[ravenmerlita]

Thank you...people act like there was a deliberate decision made for black women to not have long hair. Instead of the much simpler solution that 75 percent of AA women have chemically processed hair and the majority of us have not mastered how to properly care for it.

ITA!!! I don't understand this either. Why do people constantly neglect the fact that a great number of African American women have their hair processed with one of the most caustic chemicals known to be used on the hair?

Also, in addition to the majority of us not having mastered how to properly care for it, a great number of stylists don't know how to care for relaxed African American hair either -- overlapping, overprocessing, burning the scalp, not using a heat protectant. A lot of this happens right in the salon and reduces the length we can attain.

 

[HoneyDew]

Also, in addition to the majority of us not having mastered how to properly care for it, a great number of stylists don't know how to care for relaxed African American hair either -- overlapping, overprocessing, burning the scalp, not using a heat protectant. A lot of this happens right in the salon and reduces the length we can attain.

"Fried, dyed and laid to the side"

That saying was made up for a reason, because that is exactly what many salons do. Apparently D&L does, too.

 

[MrzLadyBuggz]

I heard this as well and was sickened. All I could say was ...... WOW. I was passed the point of irritated.

 

[Kurlee]

Really?? erplexed Maybe I am measuring my hair wrong, lol!

When i use to measure my hair, i measure the actual strands from the root to tip, not from the hair line back, because if u think about it, nine inches from ur nape is gonna fall way lower down than 9 inches from ur crown or bang area. Its more accurate IMO. It also helped me understand that hair by nature does not and cannot grow even, which is why i don't understand why stylists insist on evening up ur hair every touch up. As soon as ur hair grows it will be "uneven" again.




I hope i'm making sense.