Single Christian Women's Support - THE REMIX!

[Maracujá]

I'm not surprised. This reminds me of 2 Timothy 3:5 where God says that in the last days people will have a form of godliness but deny its power. I absolutely believe them and think it's absolutely possible, even for someone like me who is about to embark on her 30s. I Always think about what pastor Voddie Baucham said about marriage: ask any engineer in the world, if you want to know how tall a building is going to be, you don't have to wait till they build it. You just have to watch how deep they dig the foundation. If you want a skyscraper type of marriage, then dig deep.

Another Scripture that I ponder a lot is the one where the disciples ask Jesus about marriage in heaven and Jesus says that there will be no marriage in heaven (Matthew 22:30) yet He also says that whatever we bind here on earth will be bounded in heaven (Matthew 16:19). Now, correct me if I am wrong but there is no deeper way to bind with someone here on earth other than through marriage...except for what Jesus says about friendship in John 15:13. Which means that the only way to ensure eternity with your loved one is through a deep friendship and fellowship. In fact, Scripture confirms this in Song of Songs where the two lovebirds constantly refer to each other as 'my friend'. Timothy Keller explained this beautifully in his book 'The meaning of marriage'.

 

[mz.rae]

When you mean somewhere else, do you mean a different church? How did you feel about the church before you and your guy started dating? Why don't you tell him how you feel and see how he reacts. It will give you an idea of whether or not he takes your feelings/desires into consideration.

Yes a different church, and honestly before me and him started dating I was feeling the same way about the church and like I was out growing being there and needed something different for where I am at now in life. I visited a church this past Sunday and I felt right at home and am looking forward to going this Sunday. I will be talking to him about it, and let him know that I may not attend there every Sunday but can stll support him in his ministry when they have special events.

 

[laCriolla]

When my relationship turned abusive, I heard and felt a strong calling from the Lord to pray for my relationship, pray for my boyfriend and fast. It has been almost a year now and I will say my prayers were answered. almost. I prayed for him to return to the Lord, for his mental and emotional health to be restored, and generally for his ability to be in a healthy relationship. He is, but he did not renew it with me. He is everything I prayed he would be restored to with another women. I don't even know how to take it. on one hand, I am grateful to God for saving him, but on the other hand my heart is SO heavy that it turned out this way. I know the Lord will never leave or forseake me, I know in my head that God is not man that he should lie. and despite the knowing I feel abandoned. and then ashamed for feeling abandoned because I know better.

 

[Lucia]

When my relationship turned abusive, I heard and felt a strong calling from the Lord to pray for my relationship, pray for my boyfriend and fast. It has been almost a year now and I will say my prayers were answered. almost. I prayed for him to return to the Lord, for his mental and emotional health to be restored, and generally for his ability to be in a healthy relationship. He is, but he did not renew it with me. He is everything I prayed he would be restored to with another women. I don't even know how to take it. on one hand, I am grateful to God for saving him, but on the other hand my heart is SO heavy that it turned out this way. I know the Lord will never leave or forseake me, I know in my head that God is not man that he should lie. and despite the knowing I feel abandoned. and then ashamed for feeling abandoned because I know better.

@laCriolla

It sounds like such a difficult situation I can only empathize and I'm so happy you are safe.
Pleas take it one day at a time and it's not selfish to pray for yourself and take time to heal and walk with Jesus
When the time is right and its your path God will send you someone who will treat you right. May God bless you and give you peace.

http://www.traditionalcatholicpriest.com/2014/05/22/where-did-the-serenity-prayer-come-from/


Serenity Prayer
God, give us grace to accept with serenity
the things that cannot be changed,
Courage to change the things
which should be changed,
and the Wisdom to distinguish
the one from the other.

Living one day at a time,
Enjoying one moment at a time,
Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,
Taking, as Jesus did,
This sinful world as it is,
Not as I would have it,
Trusting that You will make all things right,
If I surrender to Your will,
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life,
And supremely happy with You forever in the next. Amen.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

I'm not surprised. This reminds me of 2 Timothy 3:5 where God says that in the last days people will have a form of godliness but deny its power. I absolutely believe them and think it's absolutely possible, even for someone like me who is about to embark on her 30s. I Always think about what pastor Voddie Baucham said about marriage: ask any engineer in the world, if you want to know how tall a building is going to be, you don't have to wait till they build it. You just have to watch how deep they dig the foundation. If you want a skyscraper type of marriage, then dig deep.

Another Scripture that I ponder a lot is the one where the disciples ask Jesus about marriage in heaven and Jesus says that there will be no marriage in heaven (Matthew 22:30) yet He also says that whatever we bind here on earth will be bounded in heaven (Matthew 16:19). Now, correct me if I am wrong but there is no deeper way to bind with someone here on earth other than through marriage...except for what Jesus says about friendship in John 15:13. Which means that the only way to ensure eternity with your loved one is through a deep friendship and fellowship. In fact, Scripture confirms this in Song of Songs where the two lovebirds constantly refer to each other as 'my friend'. Timothy Keller explained this beautifully in his book 'The meaning of marriage'.

I know that the Catholic christian teaching on marriage and family is that your goal is to get your spouse and children to Heaven. You should marry someone who you will strive to perfect in holiness (through marriage/parenthood). I had never heard that perspective of marriage until I converted.

As far as what you said about binding/loosing, I never thought about that in the context of marriage. I would like to do some more research on that because I'm not sure that's what the scripture was referring to, but you are giving me another perspective to look into.

 

[Maracujá]

I know that the Catholic christian teaching on marriage and family is that your goal is to get your spouse and children to Heaven. You should marry someone who you will strive to perfect in holiness (through marriage/parenthood). I had never heard that perspective of marriage until I converted.

As far as what you said about binding/loosing, I never thought about that in the context of marriage. I would like to do some more research on that because I'm not sure that's what the scripture was referring to, but you are giving me another perspective to look into.

Thank you for looking into it. That's how I had interpreted these Scriptures, and was convinced after reading Timothy Keller's 'The meaning of marriage'. Of course, neither me or him are an authority on God's Word.

 

[Lucia]

Really liking this movie
Eta I saw this movie last night and it was like an old movie with the pace but full of good Christian themes along side what is really going on in thus world today. I recommend it as a must see.

Old Fashioned tonight it's available from Netflix on DVD only.







Fireproof was good too but they're already married.

Eta
True story
A man and his wife married for 30 years he said she was traditional with good Christian and family values. He always had to bring her home before 9 pm
He said he liked that about her even though they were adults and that's why he married her.
A Godly man will recognize his bride Amen!

 

[Lucia]

 

[futureapl]

I have been feeling really discouraged lately. I can't understand why I am still single. For the past few days I've been thinking maybe there is something wrong with me. In my mind I've been thinking maybe I'm too short, ugly, or have a bad personality or just God doesnt want me to be married. know this way of thinking is wrong. I don't know how to change. I'm starting to realize that it is affecting my prayer life as well. I just feel like everyone around me is starting to settle down. Several people I know are doing the whole relationship thing the wrong way (premarital sex) in my opinion yet they are getting married.

 

[lalah]

@futureapl I was feeling the same way this morning and reading this article helped.

The Truth About Ishmael

All too often, I come across women who ask, “How long will I have to wait for my Isaac?” Some women even complain of having waited for years, and sometimes, decades to be found by their God-appointed husbands. At the same time, there are many women who hear the testimonies of other women who've waited for what appears to be unreasonable amounts of time, so they decide to go out and choose their own husbands. They'll oftentimes reason within themselves that it is okay for them to do whatever they think is necessary to get what they want if their hearts are in the right places. Of course, the women who have decided to wait on the Lord often find themselves upset when their non-faithful counterparts announce their engagements via social media. After all, if you've waited over five years to be found by your husband, you don't want to receive a phone call from your fornicating cousin asking you to be a part of her wedding.

It is not uncommon for me to receive emails from women who are upset when they see someone who's unfaithful walking down the aisle with what appears to be a good man, and for this reason, I want to share with you a few truths about Ishmael that should help you with your wait.

1. Ishmael is not the husband of promise; he is a counterfeit who comes forward when the believer doubts God and decides to bring the promise to pass on her own.
2. Faith will always scare Ishmael away, therefore, Ishmael is attracted to women who lack faith. What does this tell us? Remember, whatever you are, you are going to attract to yourself, so if you don't have the faith to wait on God, you're going to attract an unfaithful man. Ishmael is almost always unfaithful, but he eventually makes a believer out of every woman who didn't initially believe God.
3. Ishmael is the result of impatience, but the funny thing is...women who refuse to wait on God for their husbands often find themselves tearfully waiting on God to change their husbands. If being single is a problem, you'll end up marrying a problem, and it is then that you'll start seeing singleness as a solution. Be patient with God; after all, He was and is patient with you.
4. Ishmael isn't always worldly. This is the part that surprises many women because when we think about Ishmael, we think about a worldly character who is not following God. Of course, this misrepresentation of him has caused many women to end up marrying the very men Satan sent to hinder them. Please know that Satan's biggest weapons wear masks of humility and clothe themselves with costly, religious apparel in their attempts to fool the church. This means they are some of the biggest devils on the singles' market. Remember, the original Ishmael was the son of Abraham, and Abraham was a devout and faithful servant of YAHWEH.
5. Try as you may, but you cannot turn Ishmael into Isaac. Many women have gone before you and tried, and some of them are in asylums today, while others are no longer in the realm of the earth. A man is going to be whomever and whatever he wants to be until he decides that he wants to change. All the same, many women are blinded by what they believe to be a man's potential to be a good husband. Let's face it. We all have potential to be great, but we also have the potential to be evil. Don't gamble on Ishmael; you'll always come out with the losing hand.
6. Satan does disguise himself as an angel of light. Behold! You see your beautiful, religious, and fornicating friend post up a picture of her now bedazzled ring finger, with the caption, “I said yes!” You look at the likes and the comments, and she has 987 likes and 1,456 people congratulating her on her engagement. Over the next few days, you see countless photos being posted to her Facebook page, and she appears to have some angelic-like glow, and her new fiance is everything you think you want in a man. You even go to her wedding and see how beautiful she looks as she makes her way down the aisle towards her handsome and crying husband. It looks like her sin has rewarded her, right? Look again! Just wait a few years. First and foremost, I always tell women to STOP envying other women! Seriously. Envy and jealousy are very unbecoming, and they're also ungodly. With that being said, please note that sin never wins...ever! Your friend simply has a microwave blessing.
   Have you ever reheated pizza in the microwave? If you have, you've probably noticed how perfect and delectable it looked while sitting in the microwave, but the minute you tried to bite into it, you found that the microwave dried that pizza's crust. That's the way microwave romance is. It looks good from the outside, but once you get a taste of it, you'll find out just how tough it is. If you'll only keep on living, life will surprise you. That friend who appeared to have sexed her way into a blessing will one day look at you with envy when you are walking down the aisle with the promised man (Isaac), and by this time, she'll either be divorced, separated or bitter. You'll then find out that the happiest day of her life was her wedding day, and believe me, that's a sad existence. Your wedding should NEVER be the happiest day in your marriage; it should be the start of greater days.
7. If you marry Ishmael, you are in the same, rejecting Isaac. Let's get real here. Ishmael is like a used car; he can take you places, but he won't take you far, plus, he's going to keep breaking down on you. Isaac is like a new jet; he will take you to new heights and new places. He will take you to places you haven't imagined going. Sure, Isaac appears to be too expensive and too good to be true, and your understanding will tell you that it'll be years (or never) before you can afford the guy, but the truth is the distance (in years) between you and Isaac is equivalent to the time it takes for you to deny yourself wholly and follow God...with or without a man. Always remember that faith is a believer's currency, but fear, doubt and impatience are thieves sent to rob you of the promise. Any woman married to an Ishmael will vouch for me when I say that Ishmael isn't worth his price tag.

Wait on God. There's so much to you that you have not yet realized, but if you don't let God send you the right man, you will undoubtedly end up with the wrong man. Ishmael may look like an easy safe to crack, but he's not. Only God can change him. You don't have the power, longevity or the mental strength to change that man.

 

[futureapl]

@lalah thank you for posting this article.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

6 brides talk about what marriage means: http://reginamag.com/a-catholic-bride/

 

[Divine.]

6 brides talk about what marriage means: http://reginamag.com/a-catholic-bride/

Maybe I'm just being sensitive, but maybe you can give me clarity about this article. I'm not Catholic, however God has given me the same revelation about marriage as these women. When they say "Catholic Marriage," are they comparing it to secular marriages or all marriages (including Christians who are not Catholic)?

 

[Divine.]

I have been feeling really discouraged lately. I can't understand why I am still single. For the past few days I've been thinking maybe there is something wrong with me. In my mind I've been thinking maybe I'm too short, ugly, or have a bad personality or just God doesnt want me to be married. know this way of thinking is wrong. I don't know how to change. I'm starting to realize that it is affecting my prayer life as well. I just feel like everyone around me is starting to settle down. Several people I know are doing the whole relationship thing the wrong way (premarital sex) in my opinion yet they are getting married.

Honestly I don't think it's you, or even God for that matter. I believe that the problem is that we live in a fallen world with more men choosing to live for themselves instead of for Christ. I personally don't know any Christian men I would date, nor do I meet them on a regular basis. To be honest, the standards I have set for my spouse are no different than the standards I set for myself...So it's not like I'm being unreasonable or "too picky."

God does want you to be married! It's easy to just say "wait on God" or whatever other colloquial term we use to encourage single Christians, but the truth is sometimes our desire to be married can be hard to suppress. Especially if we believe God put those desires there. When I have those down moments about my singleness, I always try to pinpoint where it's coming from. Do I want to be married because I'm ready, or are these feelings stemming from loneliness, jealousy, or envy? Usually it's one or all three of those things.

And also, all that glitters isn't gold. It may appear that doing things the "wrong" way seems to be working now, but time will only tell if that marriage is strong enough to handle those trials. Sex doesn't teach you how to love. Sex creates a euphoric feeling that keeps you attached to a person. Many people misconstrue that attachment as "love" because they can't separate themselves from the other (at least not willingly). Love is not a feeling, it is an action. When you love, you forgive, you communicate and you put selfishness aside. Doing it the right way teaches you how to love like Christ and put the covenant of your marriage first.

The good thing is, you have a group of women who are all in the same season as you! So you are not alone in this journey. Even though your prayer life hasn't been as strong, I would challenge you to take one hour of your day and really communicate with God. Pour your heart out to him. Ask him to reveal any area to you that could possibly be preventing you from attracting your spouse (you are what you attract!). Doing it God's way isn't easy, but when He is the center, your marriage will always be rooted in faith.

You are loved by someone greater than any man walking this earth

 

[Belle Du Jour]

Maybe I'm just being sensitive, but maybe you can give me clarity about this article. I'm not Catholic, however God has given me the same revelation about marriage as these women. When they say "Catholic Marriage," are they comparing it to secular marriages or all marriages (including Christians who are not Catholic)?

I believe they are comparing it to any marriage that doesn't come from the same perspective (whether secular or Christian). Not necessarily all Catholics who marry even have this perspective in mind. They are probably saying "Catholic marriage" because the magazine if Catholic That beind said, Catholics believe marriage is a sacrament. I'm not sure if other Christians believe that.

 

[futureapl]

@lalah and @Divine. Thank you for reminding me that there are others out there who are going through the same things as I am. It's comforting to know. I will continue to go to My Father for guidance.

 

[Nina_S]

Thanks @futureapl , @lalah & @Divine. I needed that!

 

[Divine.]

I love this video! If any of you ladies need a bit of encouragement, this video will do that just for you!

The 2 Sides of Singleness


A few months ago, I was at the the first international True Woman Conference, Mujer Verdadera '15, when Dannah Gresh surprised her translator, Jeanine (a missionary to Taiwan), with a tiny gift.

Small but Powerful

The size of the gift was minuscule, but its impact was enormous, and it brought the audience to tears, prayer and worship. It was a holy moment not just for Jeanine, but also for every woman who was single in the room.

Experience this moment for yourself and watch this short video clip:

Dannah captured two things that I think are really important for us to acknowledge as single women:

1. She affirmed a woman's desire for marriage as a good thing.
2. She affirmed the gift of singleness as a good thing.

Two Sides of a Coin

Both the desire for marriage and the gift of singleness are good, real and a gift from God, who does all things well.

These two issues are like two sides of a coin. Both are good. And I believe that both are necessary to make a complete "coin." In many ways the natural desire for marriage and the joyful embracing of the gift of singleness brings balance to a single woman's life. The desire for marriage can help us keep an "open hand" to seasons of change (if God wants to gift us with marriage) and the gift of singleness can help us fervently pursue our Heavenly Husband—the Lover of our souls—in undistracted devotion.

Both the desire for marriage and the gift of singleness are good, real and a gift from God who does all things well.

So if you're experiencing the gift of singleness today, don't try and "return" it. Embrace it, and invest it for God's glory!

http://www.charismamag.com/life/women/23654-the-2-sides-of-singleness

 

[Lucia]

6 brides talk about what marriage means: http://reginamag.com/a-catholic-bride/

@Belle Du Jour

Wow this was inspiring and a good way of explaining the sacrament of marriage.

From article I was raised like this too

“I WAS TAUGHT TO DATE FOR MARRIAGE – always considering if I could see myself marrying the person. That made dating quite easy. My parents decided to surround themselves with people who would lead us to heaven, and that’s exactly what my husband and I have decided to do.” Travis & Samantha Brenneman

I believe they are comparing it to any marriage that doesn't come from the same perspective (whether secular or Christian). Not necessarily all Catholics who marry even have this perspective in mind. They are probably saying "Catholic marriage" because the magazine if Catholic That beind said, Catholics believe marriage is a sacrament. I'm not sure if other Christians believe that.

Adding: I'm not sure either. Yes marriage is a sacrament on the same level with taking holy orders to become a Preist or Nun. Its one of the 7 sacraments Catholics can have bestowed upon them. Our goal in marriage is not only to care for each other and any children born and make them good productive law abiding adults but to do all we can, by way of educational spiritual instruction discipline and guidance etc to get ourselves and our childrens souls to heaven.

"There are seven sacraments in the Catholic Church: Baptism, Confirmation or Chrismation, Eucharist, Penance, Anointing of the Sick, Holy Orders, and Matrimony."

In holy orders Catholics consecrate themselves mind body and soul to the Church (Church is always a her in the Bible reffered to as the Bride of Christ for Preists and Nuns consecrate themselves to Jesus as his Bride) and marriage is the equivalent so to speak if you're not called to Holy Orders.
Marriage is a sacrament between 1 man and 1 woman and the Triune God bka the Trinity to reflect Jesus' love for the church and to serve as an example in this imperfect world what true love and sacrifice is supposed to be.

In the Ephesians 5:25
25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ loved the church and handed himself over for her
26 to sanctify her, cleansing her by the bath of water with the word....

So for us practicing Catholics it's not just a piece of paper like the secular world likes to say all the time that's just for the state. But you already knew that part.

Honestly I don't think it's you, or even God for that matter. I believe that the problem is that we live in a fallen world with more men choosing to live for themselves instead of for Christ. I personally don't know any Christian men I would date, nor do I meet them on a regular basis. To be honest, the standards I have set for my spouse are no different than the standards I set for myself...So it's not like I'm being unreasonable or "too picky."

God does want you to be married! It's easy to just say "wait on God" or whatever other colloquial term we use to encourage single Christians, but the truth is sometimes our desire to be married can be hard to suppress. Especially if we believe God put those desires there. When I have those down moments about my singleness, I always try to pinpoint where it's coming from. Do I want to be married because I'm ready, or are these feelings stemming from loneliness, jealousy, or envy? Usually it's one or all three of those things.

And also, all that glitters isn't gold. It may appear that doing things the "wrong" way seems to be working now, but time will only tell if that marriage is strong enough to handle those trials. Sex doesn't teach you how to love. Sex creates a euphoric feeling that keeps you attached to a person. Many people misconstrue that attachment as "love" because they can't separate themselves from the other (at least not willingly). Love is not a feeling, it is an action. When you love, you forgive, you communicate and you put selfishness aside. Doing it the right way teaches you how to love like Christ and put the covenant of your marriage first.

The good thing is, you have a group of women who are all in the same season as you! So you are not alone in this journey. Even though your prayer life hasn't been as strong, I would challenge you to take one hour of your day and really communicate with God. Pour your heart out to him. Ask him to reveal any area to you that could possibly be preventing you from attracting your spouse (you are what you attract!). Doing it God's way isn't easy, but when He is the center, your marriage will always be rooted in faith.

You are loved by someone greater than any man walking this earth

@Divine.

PREACH!
This message was so great I will take this challenge. Thank you
Alleyuya Alleyuya Alleyuya ! Amen!

 

[Lucia]

@futureapl I was feeling the same way this morning and reading this article helped.

The Truth About Ishmael

All too often, I come across women who ask, “How long will I have to wait for my Isaac?” Some women even complain of having waited for years, and sometimes, decades to be found by their God-appointed husbands. At the same time, there are many women who hear the testimonies of other women who've waited for what appears to be unreasonable amounts of time, so they decide to go out and choose their own husbands. They'll oftentimes reason within themselves that it is okay for them to do whatever they think is necessary to get what they want if their hearts are in the right places. Of course, the women who have decided to wait on the Lord often find themselves upset when their non-faithful counterparts announce their engagements via social media. After all, if you've waited over five years to be found by your husband, you don't want to receive a phone call from your fornicating cousin asking you to be a part of her wedding.

It is not uncommon for me to receive emails from women who are upset when they see someone who's unfaithful walking down the aisle with what appears to be a good man, and for this reason, I want to share with you a few truths about Ishmael that should help you with your wait.

1. Ishmael is not the husband of promise; he is a counterfeit who comes forward when the believer doubts God and decides to bring the promise to pass on her own.
2. Faith will always scare Ishmael away, therefore, Ishmael is attracted to women who lack faith. What does this tell us? Remember, whatever you are, you are going to attract to yourself, so if you don't have the faith to wait on God, you're going to attract an unfaithful man. Ishmael is almost always unfaithful, but he eventually makes a believer out of every woman who didn't initially believe God.
3. Ishmael is the result of impatience, but the funny thing is...women who refuse to wait on God for their husbands often find themselves tearfully waiting on God to change their husbands. If being single is a problem, you'll end up marrying a problem, and it is then that you'll start seeing singleness as a solution. Be patient with God; after all, He was and is patient with you.
4. Ishmael isn't always worldly. This is the part that surprises many women because when we think about Ishmael, we think about a worldly character who is not following God. Of course, this misrepresentation of him has caused many women to end up marrying the very men Satan sent to hinder them. Please know that Satan's biggest weapons wear masks of humility and clothe themselves with costly, religious apparel in their attempts to fool the church. This means they are some of the biggest devils on the singles' market. Remember, the original Ishmael was the son of Abraham, and Abraham was a devout and faithful servant of YAHWEH.
5. Try as you may, but you cannot turn Ishmael into Isaac. Many women have gone before you and tried, and some of them are in asylums today, while others are no longer in the realm of the earth. A man is going to be whomever and whatever he wants to be until he decides that he wants to change. All the same, many women are blinded by what they believe to be a man's potential to be a good husband. Let's face it. We all have potential to be great, but we also have the potential to be evil. Don't gamble on Ishmael; you'll always come out with the losing hand.
6. Satan does disguise himself as an angel of light. Behold! You see your beautiful, religious, and fornicating friend post up a picture of her now bedazzled ring finger, with the caption, “I said yes!” You look at the likes and the comments, and she has 987 likes and 1,456 people congratulating her on her engagement. Over the next few days, you see countless photos being posted to her Facebook page, and she appears to have some angelic-like glow, and her new fiance is everything you think you want in a man. You even go to her wedding and see how beautiful she looks as she makes her way down the aisle towards her handsome and crying husband. It looks like her sin has rewarded her, right? Look again! Just wait a few years. First and foremost, I always tell women to STOP envying other women! Seriously. Envy and jealousy are very unbecoming, and they're also ungodly. With that being said, please note that sin never wins...ever! Your friend simply has a microwave blessing.
   Have you ever reheated pizza in the microwave? If you have, you've probably noticed how perfect and delectable it looked while sitting in the microwave, but the minute you tried to bite into it, you found that the microwave dried that pizza's crust. That's the way microwave romance is. It looks good from the outside, but once you get a taste of it, you'll find out just how tough it is. If you'll only keep on living, life will surprise you. That friend who appeared to have sexed her way into a blessing will one day look at you with envy when you are walking down the aisle with the promised man (Isaac), and by this time, she'll either be divorced, separated or bitter. You'll then find out that the happiest day of her life was her wedding day, and believe me, that's a sad existence. Your wedding should NEVER be the happiest day in your marriage; it should be the start of greater days.
7. If you marry Ishmael, you are in the same, rejecting Isaac. Let's get real here. Ishmael is like a used car; he can take you places, but he won't take you far, plus, he's going to keep breaking down on you. Isaac is like a new jet; he will take you to new heights and new places. He will take you to places you haven't imagined going. Sure, Isaac appears to be too expensive and too good to be true, and your understanding will tell you that it'll be years (or never) before you can afford the guy, but the truth is the distance (in years) between you and Isaac is equivalent to the time it takes for you to deny yourself wholly and follow God...with or without a man. Always remember that faith is a believer's currency, but fear, doubt and impatience are thieves sent to rob you of the promise. Any woman married to an Ishmael will vouch for me when I say that Ishmael isn't worth his price tag.

Wait on God. There's so much to you that you have not yet realized, but if you don't let God send you the right man, you will undoubtedly end up with the wrong man. Ishmael may look like an easy safe to crack, but he's not. Only God can change him. You don't have the power, longevity or the mental strength to change that man.

@lalah
Thanks for this post it's so on point and ringing true Waiting on Issac is tough but I offer it up to the Lord in prayer.

 

[Lucia]

I love this video! If any of you ladies need a bit of encouragement, this video will do that just for you!

The 2 Sides of Singleness


A few months ago, I was at the the first international True Woman Conference, Mujer Verdadera '15, when Dannah Gresh surprised her translator, Jeanine (a missionary to Taiwan), with a tiny gift.

Small but Powerful

The size of the gift was minuscule, but its impact was enormous, and it brought the audience to tears, prayer and worship. It was a holy moment not just for Jeanine, but also for every woman who was single in the room.

Experience this moment for yourself and watch this short video clip:

Dannah captured two things that I think are really important for us to acknowledge as single women:

1. She affirmed a woman's desire for marriage as a good thing.
2. She affirmed the gift of singleness as a good thing.

Two Sides of a Coin

Both the desire for marriage and the gift of singleness are good, real and a gift from God, who does all things well.

These two issues are like two sides of a coin. Both are good. And I believe that both are necessary to make a complete "coin." In many ways the natural desire for marriage and the joyful embracing of the gift of singleness brings balance to a single woman's life. The desire for marriage can help us keep an "open hand" to seasons of change (if God wants to gift us with marriage) and the gift of singleness can help us fervently pursue our Heavenly Husband—the Lover of our souls—in undistracted devotion.

Both the desire for marriage and the gift of singleness are good, real and a gift from God who does all things well.

So if you're experiencing the gift of singleness today, don't try and "return" it. Embrace it, and invest it for God's glory!

http://www.charismamag.com/life/women/23654-the-2-sides-of-singleness

Ok one of you ladies finally got me tearing up over here
That was so beautiful and inspiring.
Love the idea behind the pennies.
Thanks @Divine.

 

[Lucia]

http://www.heatherllindsey.com/2012/03/how-i-knew-my-husband-was-one.html#.Vaq1GmAquTM


Monday, March 12, 2012

(us on our wedding day, about 5 minutes before our first kiss! ;-)

As you all know, my single life wasn't the prettiest picture. I was a hot-mess to say the least. (I blogged about my single life here) I struggled by jumping from relationship to relationships on a crazy search to be whole. It was SO hard for me for a LONG time. THEN, I got SICK & tired of being SICK & tired. And I broke up with my then boyfriend in March 2008. Then, I felt like a email blast went out & all these guys kept asking me out. I knew it was a distraction. So I turned down a ton of good "christian" guys--I had NO peace about those guys. I just knew that they weren't it. I knew that I had a call on my life to go into Ministry--there was no question and whoever I married needed to have the same vision. And it wasn't enough for them to just "SAY" it-- I needed to be able to watch their relationship with Jesus myself & see some stuff' working. You cannot perpetrate the Holy Spirit. I knew HIM-- I KNEW when He was really active & moving in somebodies life and I knew when one was giving lip service. When you're that close to someone, you can SEE their life. Even in their weakness--what do they do with them? Do they turn to the world for comfort or allow God to strip them EVEN more so that they can be made into the image of Christ???

My husband WALKED by me for three years straight at church. We were in meetings together for years, saw each other from a distance, said hello every now and then and even at one point-- I walked into a room and it was just him and one other person in the room-- and I left the room and thought... (this was 2007) "I bet Cornelius is going to ask that guy for my phone number"-- but he never did! I wasn't LOOKING for him to ask for my phone number, at that time-- I was very confident in my little self! haha! I was thinking "I can have whoever I want, because I'm fly." Hey, it's a stretch from how I used to think so whatever. I never thought about it again after that moment as I'm sure I had a little boyfriend at that time.

On January 4th, 2009 after church we started talking for the first time about the church fast that was coming up. I asked him if we could eat honey or soy milk. So then, he said answered and said, "I'm going to put a cow in the ground & grow it"-- (the fast was food from a seed in the ground only). So, YES-- Cornelius started flirting with me on the low! Then he started to ask me about New York (he lived in Atlanta) and how hard it is to get around especially if you have a ton of bags from grocery shopping. Then he asked me who "helps me with my bags" (2nd time trying to find out if I have a man lol)-- I told him that I carry my bags, take a cab or I use a NYC cart.



I entertained CORNELIUS for the first time in almost a year because there was something different about him. During that time where I finally got single, I started really getting on my FACE daily before God. I went on dates with Him, talked to Him about EVERYTHING-- would spend weekends with a jug of water and my bible & just spent crazy time with Him. Note that even while I was dating randoms, I was doing this as well. Spending time with God is crazy vital. So important for your spiritual growth. HOW do you trust someone you DON'T know!? I blogged about it Spending Time with God, be sure to read it.

I had an OVERWHELMING sense of peace when I met my husband. Its like God was like FINALLY. I've been able to connect them both when they're both finally single. Let's all be clear-- I wasnt' ready those 3 years prior when I saw him. I was READY on 1/4/09. Period. Does that mean that I was "perfect" or I had "arrived" in wholeness? Heck no. I HAD a ton and I still HAVE a ton of things to work on. On Christmas day, 2008-- I was surrounded by my family and one of my sisters was like, :when are you going to start having some babies!? Your clock is tickin' (I was 26)-- I told her, "shouldn't I be married first?! I wont' have no babies with some random. When I meet a man that is FIT to be my husband and raise this next generation-- is when I'll have some kids. So as soon as I know, I'm sure you will too. Until then, I'm content in Christ. HE is all I need." Later that day, I was spending time with God and I cried out to Him.. .I said, "Lord, YOU are all I need"-- I'm SO happy and so content in You. If I'm single for another 10 years, I don't care-- YOU are all I want. YOU are all I need." Then, He told me that I was going to get married at 27. I was shocked! I was like, well, if I'm going to be married at 27, you need to bring homeboy soon because I have NO prospects. Not ONE. You told me to cut them all off and it's just me & You. So, work it out Lord..

10 days later, I met my now husband. 1 year and 8 months later and 1 month before my 28th birthday.. I married my hubby.






1. First, I finally had peace. Most guys I dated, God didn't like for us to be together-- even when I would ignore my little peace and try to make it work.

2. He refused to kiss me until our wedding day. The bible says to "Flee Fornication" for a reason. "Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body."- 1 Cor 6:18. So if homebody keeps on pressuring me to sin against my body, he clearly doesnt' love GOD or me. Jus sayin'. He SET & kept those boundaries. He did everything he could to protect me, my integrity and most importantly, honor God.

3. His vision lined up with what GOD already TOLD me. I knew in 2005 that I was called to preach and share Christ to this hurting world. Sorry, I wasn't marryin' no rapper. Yeah, he could change-- but I didn't want to wait 40 years for him to come around & change. I needed to see the guy I was supposed to marry actively pursing God RIGHT now.

4. I kept getting better in the relationship. Cornelius wasn't a stumbling block for me. He was REALLY concerned that I had a relationship with Jesus alone that was not founded in my EMOTIONS. He refused to let me depend on Him and He ALWAYS pushed me towards Christ.

5. God was ALL up in my quiet time pressing me to pray for Him & build Him up and God always encouraged me to love Him. GOD was giving me CONSTANT instruction with Cornelius. It was pretty cool. One day I was mad at Cornelius and the Lord told me-- "Why don't you ask me how to deal with Cornelius? I created Him, I can show you how he works." .. oh you're right God. lol

6. He shut me down. I don't care how you flip it-- most women like discipline from a man in the sense that THEY are leading the relationship. I was confident that Cornelius knew where he was going and he didn't need me to lead the relationship due to his confusion. I have a STRONG personality and I needed someone to tell me no. In the past, I manipulated guys so it was nice to get called out. So, Cornelius is a LEADER. I didn't want to ask my guy my whole life.. where are we going & take his little leader reins.

7. When he said something, he would do it. Guys, you gotta keep your word. How can I believe in you if you don't believe in you or what you say?

8. I was attracted to him. I had to put this in-- sometimes, we think we have to marry someone we aren't attracted to because we think that he's it. Once, I dated this guy that I wasn't 100% attracted to and I struggled with it and thought I had to marry him because he was one of the first Christan guys I dated after I got saved. I didn't know there were cute Christians. Jus sayin'. I wanna LIKE looking at him for the rest of my life. Yeah, stuff can happen but one of my desires was to be attracted to my guy. NOT the main desire, but one of them.

9. He was growing. While we courted, he was willing to ADJUST and change. I knew that when things would come our way, He would man up, admit his mistakes & CHANGE. He wasn't trying to hold on to his old ways. He wanted to be better and was willing to adjust. AND he let ME grow. He wasn't all hard on me-- pressuring me to be some doctor or lawyer because it looked good. He let me grow UP from all of my weaknesses & issues. He HELPED me & was patient with me.

10. With all of that said, he really loved Jesus. It encouraged me. Jobs can come and go, money can leave, looks can fade but if that man really, I mean really loves Jesus and wants to live for Him-- NOTHING is impossible. My spirit was so excited about every aspect of Cornelius. I was never NOT at peace with him. I wanted so many things in a man and I never thought I would meet someone with my desires. God exceeded my expectations and my husband MEASURED up. Yours will too.

11. (Bonus number) I RESPECTED HIM alot because of the above. Don't marry someone you don't respect or look up to.



Remember this is no formula. I am just sharing what was important to ME. Let God lead you every second of the way. And if that guy or girl hasn't come.. they aren't supposed to. Keep your eyes in your own grass and focus on GOD & working with your portion. Let GOD be your matchmaker.

God loves you like crazy,
Heather

 

[futureapl]

Ladies please pray for me. It seems like whenever I'm feeling down and out Mr. Wrong always tries to creep in. My ex boyfriend from 4 years ago contacted me yesterday while I was watching a sermon about 1 Peter 4. He was practically begging me to be his friend while also telling me he loves me. This guy is no good. He just got married in April. I keep telling him I don't want to be his friend nor have any contact with him. He seems to not be taking me seriously. I don't know how to respectfully tell him to leave me alone.

 

[bellatiamarie]

Ladies please pray for me. It seems like whenever I'm feeling down and out Mr. Wrong always tries to creep in. My ex boyfriend from 4 years ago contacted me yesterday while I was watching a sermon about 1 Peter 4. He was practically begging me to be his friend while also telling me he loves me. This guy is no good. He just got married in April. I keep telling him I don't want to be his friend nor have any contact with him. He seems to not be taking me seriously. I don't know how to respectfully tell him to leave me alone.

Praying for you sis... keep that door CLOSED and locked. Don't let the enemy fool and trick you... he's a married man.

 

[Divine.]

Ladies please pray for me. It seems like whenever I'm feeling down and out Mr. Wrong always tries to creep in. My ex boyfriend from 4 years ago contacted me yesterday while I was watching a sermon about 1 Peter 4. He was practically begging me to be his friend while also telling me he loves me. This guy is no good. He just got married in April. I keep telling him I don't want to be his friend nor have any contact with him. He seems to not be taking me seriously. I don't know how to respectfully tell him to leave me alone.

Um...you don't respectfully tell him anything. You block and delete his number and ignore his advances. Men respond to actions, not words.

The Lord says to guard our hearts and that's exactly what you have to do. This blog by Cornelius Lindsey changed my whole perspective when I was trying to find a "nice" way to tell a man who disrespected me we couldn't talk anymore: http://thebookofcornelius.blogspot.com/2014/12/confessions-of-womanizer.html?m=0

You need to look out for yourself.

 

[bellatiamarie]

1 Peter 5:10
10 After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you.

Jeremiah 17:7-8
7 Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord, and whose hope the Lord is.
8 For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters, and that spreadeth out her roots by the river, and shall not see when heat cometh, but her leaf shall be green; and shall not be careful in the year of drought, neither shall cease from yielding fruit.

 

[futureapl]

@ Divine I deleted his number four years ago and asked him to delete mine. He obviously didn't. I blocked his number last night. Somehow after blocking it he was still able to text me.

 

[Divine.]

@ Divine I deleted his number four years ago and asked him to delete mine. He obviously didn't. I blocked his number last night. Somehow after blocking it he was still able to text me.

Then continue to ignore him or change your number. He'll leave you alone once he realizes he can't access you.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

6 Part love story:

"It all started with a prayer. As I entered my 30s, I still wanted to get married. But I chose to surrender both my loneliness and desire to have a family to Him knowing that He wants what is best for me. And then, in Germany, I met Roman. . ."

http://learningtoserve-raluca.blogspot.de/2014/01/our-love-story-our-very-first-meeting.html

 

[Belle Du Jour]

Recent young adults series on marriage in NYC: