RabiaElaine
New Member
Hey Ladies,
So here goes. As some of you know I recently decided to become abstinent and change the way I was living my life. I joined a Christian dating site a few months ago but really haven’t been going on it until recently. Anyway about a week and a half ago I started having phone conversations with this single Pastor that I met on the site. He told me that he was 28 and told me that he had never had an actual girlfriend. I was astonished because I’ve never met a guy that old that has NEVER had a girlfriend. Anyway he explained that he wasn’t comfortable approaching women until a few years ago.
Anyway last night during our conversation he asked me if I was a virgin. I told him I wasn’t. When I told him that his voice changed. He started asking me questions in an accusatory tone. He asked me if I was a Christian when I did this. I told him yes I was, but my relationship with the Lord wasn’t right. I was doing my own thing. Anyway to make a long story short he basically told me that he believed that God had a virgin out there for him, someone who had saved herself like he did. He told me he was still very attracted to me but he was going to find his virgin. He said that if God told him that he was supposed to be with me anyway that he would accept me willingly.
Now don’t get me wrong, I was not wrapped up in this guy at all because we had only known each other a very very short time. But after I hung up the phone I cried myself to sleep. I feel so guilty again. I feel like I’m going to carry this non-virgin identity around with me for the rest of my life, even though I’m not the same person I used to be. I REFUSE to lie about it. I’m just scared that no one is going to accept me because of it.
Has this ever happened to any of you before, how have you dealt with it.
So here goes. As some of you know I recently decided to become abstinent and change the way I was living my life. I joined a Christian dating site a few months ago but really haven’t been going on it until recently. Anyway about a week and a half ago I started having phone conversations with this single Pastor that I met on the site. He told me that he was 28 and told me that he had never had an actual girlfriend. I was astonished because I’ve never met a guy that old that has NEVER had a girlfriend. Anyway he explained that he wasn’t comfortable approaching women until a few years ago.
Anyway last night during our conversation he asked me if I was a virgin. I told him I wasn’t. When I told him that his voice changed. He started asking me questions in an accusatory tone. He asked me if I was a Christian when I did this. I told him yes I was, but my relationship with the Lord wasn’t right. I was doing my own thing. Anyway to make a long story short he basically told me that he believed that God had a virgin out there for him, someone who had saved herself like he did. He told me he was still very attracted to me but he was going to find his virgin. He said that if God told him that he was supposed to be with me anyway that he would accept me willingly.
Now don’t get me wrong, I was not wrapped up in this guy at all because we had only known each other a very very short time. But after I hung up the phone I cried myself to sleep. I feel so guilty again. I feel like I’m going to carry this non-virgin identity around with me for the rest of my life, even though I’m not the same person I used to be. I REFUSE to lie about it. I’m just scared that no one is going to accept me because of it.
Has this ever happened to any of you before, how have you dealt with it.