.....R men designed to chase? have a need to cheat?

[tHENATuRALhAiRpRoJEcT]

Erykah Baduh shares her views (in vibe magazine) on men & cheating.....do you agree with her sentiment?


i mean ladies......do we have a chance?:swordfigh


On Whether Cheating Was the Reason For Past Break Ups
“No. Infidelity is not a deal-breaker for me. We’re all born sexual beings. I myself am not someone with a very high libido. I don’t require sex for happiness – I need companionship. I need a partner I can depend on, that I can love and grow with. But I do understand the nature of these men I’ve been with, and men in general. They have a need to chase.”
On whether she tolerates cheating:
In my own kind of way. I’m having to recondition my brain, ’cos the first thing I got was a doll named Barbie and she had Ken and that’s how it was supposed to be. You’re conditioned to think that way, and when it doesn’t happen you feel you’re a failure. What we have in common, me and the brothers I’ve known, is that we are all trying to evolve.
“We talk a lot about things that men want. Because I want them to be happy and the more I see how the male of the species behaves, the more I understand, and the less I blame him. It’s just who he is. Is there a solution?” “Honesty is it. It will get you everywhere. Mind you, I have friends who are in polygamous relationships – they’re no more happy or sad than we are. But at least the b*tches know what’s comin’ next!”

​

 

[Maynard]

I hardly consider Badu to be a relationship guru.

 

[BeautifulFlower]

She's not wrapped tight so I wouldn't consider this relationship wisdom.

Love her music though.

 

[tHENATuRALhAiRpRoJEcT]

lol! naah ladies, not many people are gurus lmao

HOWEVER....the chase? i almost feel the proof is in the pudding

 

[Lynnerie]

[B]Erykah Badu's quote[/B]
On Whether Cheating Was the Reason For Past Break Ups
“No. Infidelity is not a deal-breaker for me. We’re all born sexual beings. I myself am not someone with a very high libido. I don’t require sex for happiness – I need companionship. I need a partner I can depend on, that I can love and grow with. But I do understand the nature of these men I’ve been with, and men in general. They have a need to chase.”
On whether she tolerates cheating:
In my own kind of way. I’m having to recondition my brain, ’cos the first thing I got was a doll named Barbie and she had Ken and that’s how it was supposed to be. You’re conditioned to think that way, and when it doesn’t happen you feel you’re a failure. What we have in common, me and the brothers I’ve known, is that we are all trying to evolve.
“We talk a lot about things that men want. Because I want them to be happy and the more I see how the male of the species behaves, the more I understand, and the less I blame him. It’s just who he is. Is there a solution?” “Honesty is it. It will get you everywhere. Mind you, I have friends who are in polygamous relationships – they’re no more happy or sad than we are. But at least the b*tches know what’s comin’ next!”

​

I believe a few things Erykah stated.
1. I do believe that men are designed to chase. However SOME never settle down. They just continue to chase. I don't think all men are like this maybe just the ones she chooses.

2. When the man doesn't settle down with us we do sometimes feel we have failed in some way. We wonder what we did wrong...

3. "Its just who he is." My father says this all the time. This means the way a man behaves has little to do with you. Thats just who he is.

For example- Eric Benet and Halle Berry. IMO this is a perfect example- People still can't believe he cheated on Halle Berry Well, He was going to cheat because thats who he is. He's a cheater. He cheated on the previous woman he was with and he cheated on Halle. (I'm not trying to bash Eric Benet cause I do luv his music but he is who he is.)

A lot of times women will say- "Well maybe if I did this more, or maybe if I did that he wouldn't have done this" I say it has nothing to do with you- Thats just who he is. He would've done it with anyone.

 

[caramelmocha]

I understand her point of view clearly when she say polygamy relationship her girlfriends are in least they know whats coming LOL!! that is true because when you are in a relationship like that you already know what to expect there are no surprises. Now it is more hurtful when you find that your man been cheating on you. Just sharing my opinion that's all. Men loveee women, some men just cant be with one women

 

[tHENATuRALhAiRpRoJEcT]

I believe a few things Erykah stated.
1. I do believe that men are chase However SOME never settle down. They just continue to chase.

2. When the man doesn't settle down with us we do sometimes feel we have failed in some way. We wonder what we did wrong...

3. "Its just who he is." My father says this all the time. This means the way a man behaves has little to do with you. Thats just who he is.

I HAVE 16 BROTHERS & SIS.....
a host of cousins, friends, observation
gurl for the most part, i know the above to be true


guys settle down often within a specific age period.....and the most suitable around at the time often (not always) ends up being "the 1"
timing is everything with men

 

[Lynnerie]

^^ Very true. It is all about timing with a man. My father dated a woman for 10 years and they had a child together. He was playing the field. Then when he turned 29 he married my mother who was only 20. He married her after knowing her for only 3 months. And it was a long distance relationship. He said he couldn't be apart from her. 33 years later and my parents are still happily married. My dad always tells me that when a man is ready to do right he does.

 

[tHENATuRALhAiRpRoJEcT]

danell

that's y i've been waiting :-( so hard to bring a life in this world without some type of assurance the father wants to be there to raise the child

YOU CAN'T REPLACE THE INVALUABLE ADVICE OF A FATHER

MY DAD ALWAYS SAID (DIDN'T GET IT THEN....DAMN HITS HOME HARD NOW)
"A MAN CAN ONLY BRING YOU UP.....OR BRING YOU DOWN......THERE IS NO IN BETWEEN"

 

[jdvzmommy]

“We talk a lot about things that men want. Because I want them to be happy and the more I see how the male of the species behaves, the more I understand, and the less I blame him. It’s just who he is. Is there a solution?” “Honesty is it. It will get you everywhere. Mind you, I have friends who are in polygamous relationships – they’re no more happy or sad than we are. But at least the b*tches know what’s comin’ next!”

Ok...I understand wanting to make your man happy, but what about making yourself happy?
She talks about things men want and understanding men, but what about what women want?

I think some guy (or guys) just fed her a bunch of bull about "evolving" and she fell for it.

 

[princessnad]

Some men are born cheaters. Learn to recognize them and run if you don't want to be in a "polygamous" relationship.

Other men can and will be faithful. Cultivate relationships with them.