Please Encourage Us Awkward-stage Naturals With Your Tips, Victories, And Advice

curlyTisME said:
It's GLORIOUS!
Stick with it, you will reap the benefits soon!
*hug*
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Woo! Woooooosaaaaaaa.

@curlyTisME ! Thank you so much for your post. It's so timely.

I left the house this morning after trying to revive yesterday's wash and go, and I was just looking upside my head in the mirror. If I could just get enough hang to recognize my face again!

Whoooooooo. I just need to hold and re-center myself into a space of peaceful patience. Once I get a good amount of length, I might really, really be at home with my hair.

I can't let myself relax it, at least not just yet. Relaxers were starting to damage my edges. I just need to calm down and keep journeying!

Again, thank you so much. Very encouraging, and I needed it this morning!
 
Work with your texture, not against it. When I was transitioning and had neck length hair I did roller sets once a week and left it alone. I also loved doing finger coils. That was my favorite! I can't do them anymore because I can't seem to figure out how to get them to hold on longer(apl-bsb) hair.
 
LivingInPeace said:
Work with your texture, not against it. When I was transitioning and had neck length hair I did roller sets once a week and left it alone. I also loved doing finger coils. That was my favorite! I can't do them anymore because I can't seem to figure out how to get them to hold on longer(apl-bsb) hair.
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:yep: Makes a lot of sense. Many, many thanks. :) That's a good reminder and a peace-inducing approach.
 
stephanie75miller said:
@mysblossom you are such a breath of fresh air on the hair side. You have been making some great threads since you joined. I'm in the awkward stage as well. I just live in wash n goes at the moment. I will be happy when it get longer. I just try to focus on what I do like about my hair right now.
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Awww, thanks! Solidarity hugs from one future-shoulder-length-when unstretched natural to another! ;) :D

And you are sooooooo right: I've got to remember to count my (hair) blessings. Man, thanks for the timely reminder!: I do like some things about my hair right now.

Breathe in. Breathe out.
 
Prettymetty said:
I wigged it pretty much every day during my twa stage. I wore a wash n go every now and then too. Once I got to neck length I became a (mostly) straight haired natural and my hair growth really took off.
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Your hair is really nice! And that is interesting to know and super comforting! I'll have to keep in mind the option of being a straight-haired natural, especially before just straight up relaxing if that is not yet what I truly want at the moment.

Many thanks!
 
Here is my advice and encouragement.

Don't cut your layers. Even if the back of your hair looks like an inverted shelf, one day it will look like a cascade of hair.

Get some bobby pins. I bet your hair looks great in the back. But when it's at an awkward length, it might not drape well around your face. Pinning it away from your face can help you feel more confident.

Get a blow out when you're not feeling the natural texture. It will remind you how much your hair has grown.
 
I find that whenever the awkward stage gets on my nerves, I straighten it.
It's a nice, blunt even shoulder length so it looks good.

my best natural styles are braid and curls. I don't try to do super defined styles at this stage, i want volume. so i tease the heck out of my hair to make big curly fros.
 
I bc'd in April of this year. My relaxed hair was bsl but was very unhealthy because of my diet and health problems. After my bc, I had about an inch or half of inch of hair. I wanted it all gone. I now have about 4-5 inches even with a 1 inch trim this month. I wash, dc and steam and wear wigs every day until I reach my desired length.
 
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I loved my hair in the awkward stage. I too miss it.

Washing, dc, and everything else was a breeze. I section in fours, after I moisturize & seal I twist it or braid the sections.
Yes it was tiny twists/braids in length but upon takedown it was nice.
You can also pin the front to form a style. Don't have any pics of twist/braid out. I do have some. First pic I pinned back the top front. Second is Afro. I love twa on all folks. Just love the look period.
 

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I almost recut mine but trying to remain vigilant lol. I'm thinking I'm going to try twisted up for styles to keep my hands out of it and my styling frustration low. I'm coming out of a very easy to maintain tapered cut. The sides are my biggest pain point. Not too short but not very long in their natural state.
 
I remember those awkward stages and it can be hard. There are alot more products and info available now though. I encourage you to stick with it and try to enjoy the journey. After 15 years natural I still get frustrated sometimes. Honestly if you can find a good natural stylist it can be helpful sometimes to take a break from doing your own hair. I just remember headbands and pretty scarves were my fav accessories when growing it out. I wore rollersets and twistouts alot.
 
I never understood this "awkward stage" thing.

I enjoyed my hair at every length it's been.

My advice, just enjoy your hair for what it is. You can still so twist/braid outs, updos, tuck and rolls, twista, cornrows... you're not as limited as you might feel. Plus shorter lengths are really fitting on some people.

I know we're a hair board, but long hair isn't everything... And quite frankly, you may get bored with that too. So enjoy what you've got!
 
Honestly, I kind of miss that awkward stage. I loved my TWA so much that I cut my hair 3 times in 2012, but really I think I just didn't want to deal with how to style it when it reached that weird length. Last cut was December 2012, and by August 2013, I had a vintage photo shoot done with my fro picked out, and spent much of the summer in finger coils which showed the length! When it wasn't picked out in the fro (rare because of tangles, knots, and people thinking they can put their hands in my hair!) then I did wash and gos and now that my hair is longer, it doesn't respond the same way to the same styles or products!

This truly is a journey, but I've come to love it. I'll try and come back later with some pictures of some styles! I have to go through my files and find some!

Just hang in there, and try switching up styles/products if something isn't working. If there is someone you trust to style your hair, ask them to do a style that you can't do for yourself. I have a dear friend who is gifted with braids, she did a nice braided style with twists in the front, and it gave me a break from the same styles/hours long wash days/styling and being frustrated!

Just some thoughts. Stay strong!
 
I have been natural for a very long time and I kept it as a twa for about 8 years. I grew it out to about 18 inches stretched and you know even then it was only about 6 inches curly - initially that is pretty aggravating. Then I started to notice many women with curly hair especially in the 4s do not show length it gets fuller and this is at odds with what we see in magazines and on tv. So step one accept that shrinkage is real!
Like many others have said my advice is learn to love your hair, celebrate the coils and curls. Figure out what it like and what it hates...and if you hair is like mine this will change as your length changes. This year I finally committed to the wash and go so I cut my hair curly and it was the best move I have made since I was a twa. So practice lots of styles - do you like it better as a poof? or pulled back off of your face? how about to one side?
Last is how are your eye brows? when I was a TWA I got used to seeing all of my face but getting my eye brows done by a specialist weird I know but he really framed them to fit me.
Hang in there :-)
 
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