Okay so tell me if im wrong

[Kerryann]

Yesterday when leaving work i went to the gas station because my tank was just about on E. I tried using my bank card so it wouldnt go through unfortunately my Car insurance company took money from my account when they werent suppose to which means i am now somewhat stranded cause i had no cash on me.

I called my SO and was about to tell him what happened so that he can deposit some cash in my account so that i can get gas to go home but i said to him let me call you right back before telling him what happened.

Since im right around the corner from work i called my coworker to to borrow $20 to buy some gas of course my coworker said okay. Now my SO calls back before i got a chance to call him and he heared my coworker talking to me while he was putting the gas in my car but anyway needless to say i told him what happened.

The man got mad and cuss me out telling me how he was trying to be there for me and i didnt allow him to and that i always have so other man doing things for me.
Now tell me if this man did not flip his lid. He lives about 2 1/2hrs away cause of the traffic and crap do you guys really feel that i shouldve waited that long sitting in a gas station waiting for him to come buy me gas to go home? He was really mad and said if anything happens dont call him anymore and a whole bunch of junk. I simply told him i think he is over reacting and is he really going to drive that far to get me gas when my coworker is right there around the corner.


Ladies was there anything wrong with what i did and seriously he was having his period it happens 2 weeks out of the month which drives me the hell crazy

 

[KEIONI'S MOM]

Kerryann you were not wrong at all. First off before you could say BOO he was off the phone not even a "Baby is everything alright" nothing it was let me call you right back............(by the way I HATE that) anywhoo what were you suppose to do???? wait and be stranded???? He should have asked what was up and the purpose of your call before he told you too wait. I would not have waited I would have asked for some assistance from someone else and let the chips fall where they may.

BTW if he flips out all the time for no apparent reason he needs to grow up and you need to nip that it the bud sooner than later. JMHO

 

[mscocoface]

Don't know about the period part but men in general want to do for their ladies and they want to be the first responder if ya know what I mean.

I had to learn this with my new DH I was use to being very self sufficient and we had heated arguments about this in the beginning.

The way he explained it was similar to your SO so, I guess it is a guy thing. I have had to truly put myself in his place and wonder if the situation was him needing help and going to another woman how would I feel?

It doesn't make me any less independent I am just more understanding of his thinking and feelings.

Not saying it is right or wrong but that is my understanding. My DH is very old skool about these matters and I understand that now. Sounds like your SO is also.

 

[Browndilocks]

You should have just told him what happened. Don't start something and fail to follow through after you brought it to his attention. I can see your logic, but I believe you exercised poor communication.

 

[dlewis]

I think he overreacted. But why did you call him to begin with and then tell him you would get back with him?

 

[QueenHav]

Maybe you could have sent him a text once you confirmed the coworker?? IDK

As long as you were safe, your SO should be ok IMHO

 

[dlewis]

You should have just told him what happened. Don't start somethng and fail to follow through after you brought it to his attention. I can see your logic, but I believe you exercised poor communication.

I agree. And that's prob why he's frustrated.

But then again you said this happens twice a month.

 

[anon123]

I don't understand the story. How did your SO overhear you? Was he still on the phone? I thought y'all hung up?

I don't know what to say about this, but I do know he was dead wrong for cussing you out. I just don't understand, do people no longer give each other basic respect? Why are partners cussing each other out? I have never ever ever had a man cuss me out and if he talked to me like that, we would be through.

 

[Browndilocks]

I don't understand the story. How did your SO overhear you? Was he still on the phone? I thought y'all hung up?

I don't know what to say about this, but I do know he was dead wrong for cussing you out. I just don't understand, do people no longer give each other basic respect? Why are partners cussing each other out?

Yeah, I don't agree with the cussing out part. But I can understand the frustration. It's like when someone says "I have something to tell you" then you ask what and they say "Never mind". It's that type of pet-peevish thing coupled with some egotistical man thing that sometimes pisses them off.

 

[JustKiya]

Okay - to be sure I understand what happened.

You were at the gas station, with no money. You called your SO to ask him to transfer some money to your account (or to bring you money?) and then get the idea to just call your coworker around the corner while you are on the phone with your SO, so you tell him you will call him back.

He calls you back while your coworker was there, pumping your gas, and gets livid that you didn't ask him for the money.

Now.

If - and only if - you wanted him to transfer some money - ie, an instant transfer of loot - I can fully understand why he was salty that you called someone else for money when you had him on the phone, and he could have hopped online and put some money in your account.

Him cussing you is a whole nother discussion.

On the other hand, if you would have had to wait the 2.5 hours for him to drive there, give you the money in your hand, and then drive back - there is no way in hell I would have waited for him, when I had another source of money 5 minutes away - and that's just realtalk.

So. Which is it? Money in hand, or transferred money to account?

If it's money in hand, the man is out of his damn mind.

 

[brownelovely]

Guys don't want some other guy taking care of their woman =>regardless of what's going on. Call it good ole male pride. If you were going to do brorrow from the co-worker then you should have just done that first instead of calling SO only to end the convo early.

He may have overreacted a bit but had he done this to you with a female co-worker in a similar situation....how would you have reacted? He was probably more offended b/c it was a guy also.

 

[dlewis]

I don't understand the story. How did your SO overhear you? Was he still on the phone? I thought y'all hung up?

I don't know what to say about this, but I do know he was dead wrong for cussing you out. I just don't understand, do people no longer give each other basic respect? Why are partners cussing each other out? I have never ever ever had a man cuss me out and if he talked to me like that, we would be through.

He heard her coworker talking in the background when they talked later.

 

[Kerryann]

I told him i called my coworker which was 15 steps away from the gas station.

and as for the cussing out thing im from the islands thats what we say which means he was yelling a lot for no reason i dont play that crap not over here sister

I was frustrated and 50 billion ideas was running in my head as to how im going to get home shoots so i didnt get to explain myself to him all the way cause i came up with an idea but i called him to let him know that my coworker was going to help. when my coworker came over i was talking to my SO and then i told him i was going to call him back after that it was a wrap.

And as for tranfering the money it wasnt happening because we dont have the same bank so i wouldnt get that until the next day or two.
He wanted to bring me the money in hand he lost his ever loving mind cause i dont see anything wrong with what i did

 

[JustKiya]

I told him i called my coworker which was 15 steps away from the gas station.

and as for the cussing out thing im from the islands thats what we say which means he was yelling a lot for no reason i dont play that crap not over here sister

I was frustrated and 50 billion ideas was running in my head as to how im going to get home shoots so i didnt get to explain myself to him all the way cause i came up with an idea but i called him to let him know that my coworker was going to help. when my coworker came over i was talking to my SO and then i told him i was going to call him back after that it was a wrap.

And as for tranfering the money it wasnt happening because we dont have the same bank so i wouldnt get that until the next day or two.
He wanted to bring me the money in hand he lost his ever loving mind cause i dont see anything wrong with what i did

Okay, yeah, he was tripping, then. 2.5 HOURS? Maybe half an hour. MAYBE.

I don't see anything wrong with what you did, either - the only thing, is that you shouldn't have called him, if you knew he wasn't going to be able to help you. Just handle it, and then let him know AFTER the fact that you had something that needed to be handled - and stroke his lil ego a bit by saying that you wanted to call, but knew he was out of range/too damn far away - so you handled it yourself.

2.5 hours. I wish I would sit at a gas station for 2.5 hours waiting on you to bring me some money when I've got a resource around the corner. Umph.

 

[Kerryann]

i told him to bring the situation to one of his friends and i guarantee they would say he is overreacting.
I just know that i will never ever ever do that again i just hate walking around with cash i use my bank card for everything to see where my money goes.

Next time with him i will know better not to let him know crap until after

 

[Marley4920]

I think cause co-worker = man (and he overheard him through the phone), it took the very small situation to another level for him. And then he gets dismissed with the "I'll call you back" when the co-worker walks over to you . I would have flipped too.

If coworker = girl, maybe not so much of an issue for him.

 

[ang3lface816]

I understand what you are saying OP. But you have to remember, men want to be THE MAN. You should have thought of a better option before calling him, or BS'D him when he called back wanting to know why you were calling. No man I know who truly values/loves their woman is gonna be ok about her taking money from another man. I had a guy once tell me, If a man is giving you money then there is a motive. So being a man, your hubby realizes this. Also I'm sure this coworker of yours knows that you are married, so if he is doing all this with an ulterior motive, his ego has been stroked. He feels as if he is providing for you (his future woman) and that your hubby cannot. He thinks this is a sign that you may want him. This is probably another reason why your hubby was so angry b/c it makes it appear as if he is not taking care of you/or can not afford to do things for you.

**Also, if he weren't so caught up in the above feeling, he would have realized he was being \irrational by expecting you to wait.. But in his eyes, you just disrespected him and lowered his value to that of someone who cant even provide...


I hope that makes sense

 

[Kerryann]

I understand what you are saying OP. But you have to remember, men want to be THE MAN. You should have thought of a better option before calling him, or BS'D him when he called back wanting to know why you were calling. No man I know who truly values/loves their woman is gonna be ok about her taking money from another man. I had a guy once tell me, If a man is giving you money then there is a motive. So being a man, your hubby realizes this. Also I'm sure this coworker of yours knows that you are married, so if he is doing all this with an ulterior motive, his ego has been stroked. He feels as if he is providing for you (his future woman) and that your hubby cannot. He thinks this is a sign that you may want him. This is probably another reason why your hubby was so angry b/c it makes it appear as if he is not taking care of you/or can not afford to do things for you.

**Also, if he weren't so caught up in the above feeling, he would have realized he was being \irrational by expecting you to wait.. But in his eyes, you just disrespected him and lowered his value to that of someone who cant even provide...


I hope that makes sense

Im not married lol. My coworker is and older white married man with 2 kids and is losing some of his hair who has no interest in me what so ever so trust me there is nothing for him to worry about and he knows this