None of my business but...

I'm happy this was bumped because I have an update but wasn't sure if I should've updated (cuz really I'm being gossipy at this point lol). Anyway, they've decided to work on their relationship, and they recently went on a trip to reconnect. She also did not tell their pastor and they're working it out between themselves.

Please do not quote will delete: He had a work trip again last week and the other woman was not meant to go but apparently asked their director to be allowed on the trip and was told that there was not enough funding as the budget catered only for a certain number of persons attending the conference. He found out because another colleague mentioned it in passing. He has since cut contact with her, outside of professional communication, so he didn't know the "OW's" intentions, but he told his wife once he found out.

Though I said previously that my friend's reaction was pretty drastic, I still do not fully believe him and I think he fed her that story to further cover his communication with the "OW".
 
Black Ambrosia said:
I thought of this thread when I saw this. :lol:
Click to expand...

The lack of shame is astounding. How will X-Twitter/TikTok solve his problems? He slept with and impregnated an unstable/irresponsible woman and she had the baby and now he's whining that she's irresponsible and he has to take care of his flesh and blood? Whose fault is that? He should have cHoSe BeTTeR.

Sympathy for the child.
And why is a full-grown man on TikTok anyhow? Boy bye:abducted:
 
LiftedUp said:
I'm happy this was bumped because I have an update but wasn't sure if I should've updated (cuz really I'm being gossipy at this point lol). Anyway, they've decided to work on their relationship, and they recently went on a trip to reconnect. She also did not tell their pastor and they're working it out between themselves.
Click to expand...
If he's genuinely cut contact, that's a good sign. Wishing them good luck.
 
blessedandfavoured said:
The lack of shame is astounding. How will X-Twitter/TikTok solve his problems? He slept with and impregnated an unstable/irresponsible woman and she had the baby and now he's whining that she's irresponsible and he has to take care of his flesh and blood? Whose fault is that? He should have cHoSe BeTTeR.

Sympathy for the child.
And why is a full-grown man on TikTok anyhow? Boy bye:abducted:
Click to expand...
They’re both unstable and irresponsible. I feel like she just played a better game of chess with it and won.

This right here is the type of game I’d play- and if I could do something worse- I would. :look:
 
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Everything Zen said:
They’re both unstable and irresponsible. I feel like she just played a better game of chess with it and won.
Click to expand...
I feel the same. She may be irresponsible but I'm getting 'fed up' vibes. I can't imagine not having a relationship with my child but I can see going to extreme measures to cut ties with a man like that. He's getting EXACTLY what he deserves. He couldn't wait to one-up her by filing for custody. He didn't want custody though. He wanted to make it hard for her to get child support and basically make her suffer. It says a lot that he's doing all this to the woman he was engaged to. He planned to share a life with this woman but she gets pregnant and he disappears only to come back after the child is born to make sure she isn't 'in his pockets.' Now he's on social media making her out to be a dead beat. POT.MEET.KETTLE.

I'm glad the law isn't on his side.
 
So I have an update. I was initially surprised but the more I thought about it, the less I surprised I'm becoming.

On my friend's side, she said that they have been working on their marriage . He took her on a trip to reconnect and they're doing fine. He keeps giving her updates about the "OW", which I found weird, but I was going to leave it at that. However, this morning during our team meeting, our Deputy Director brought up his name. Apparently, there was a follow-up trip to the previous work trip in the OP. She said that the team that went to X, went back to finalize whatever and that we need to liaise with them. Them being him and the other woman only as they were the only ones who went back. Now, my friend did mention to me that her husband went on a work trip recently and after she picked him up, they went out to breakfast etc. We speak nearly daily so it was part of our daily conversation. I did find it odd that he would've done 2 trips to the same place so soon (there was a conference then two weeks after this) but didn't think about it deeply or anything.

I do not know if anything happened. I am at a point in my life where I value our friendship but do not know if I should bring this up. This would change our relationship for sure, and I do not know if anything happened, however, I do know that my friend does not know that she went. I don't know what is the ethical decision to make here and I don't want to lose my friend over this.
 
@Black Ambrosia yes and no. I firmly believe that things naturally reveal themselves, however, if a friend feels moved to tell me then I'd be ok with it. I do know that if I tell her, it would mark the end of our friendship, and that's something that I'd want to avoid.
 
I wouldn’t tell. At this point she has enough information about him and this woman. She already knows enough inappropriate things have occurred between them. I’d stay out of it and keep my friend. It would be different if she was completely clueless. Over time I think she’s going to need you and your support. I wouldn’t get in the middle of it at this point. Deep down I’m sure she still has suspicions and doesn’t fully trust him.
 
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I would tell. But I'm OK with losing a friendship over it especially if I feel that I am looking out for my friend. I would want to know and I wouldn't cut off a friend for telling me.

if I found out that my friend knew the new information that you have about the second trip but she didn't tell me then I would look at them differently.
 
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