need help, sister vs. boyfriend

[celiabug]

So my boyfriends got my sister (s) and her boyfriend (j) put in a good with his supervisors and got the both a job. Well my sister had to get her tonsils out so she was able to get a week off. Here's where the problems started.

J has only worked one week and in that week he managed to get 5 and a half deferences because he called out once and was late the other 4 times or left early. Then after one week my sister decided that she needed another week off for her tonsils so she called in for the whole week but during this time she was hanging out with J at his house.

Today Js supervisor called him in and said he can get 1 more deference before he is fired so instead of working he just quit. My sister is supposed to go back to work tomorrow but since J quit she has decided to quit too. I'm upset because my boyfriend went and put his name on them to get them this job and they don't even care. They were both complaining about how much they need a job now they don't even have one.

I'm extremely upset but I haven't said anything about it. Should I?

 

[curlicarib]

They are both adults (right?) so let them do what they want. However, I would let them know that someone went out of their way for them and it will never happen again. Unfortunately your BF is going to bear the brunt of it at work, but hopefully his work reputation is such that it can withstand this assault.

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

Yes. Say something and let them know that you and your bf will not be giving anymore references/ hookups with jobs.

Did you guys know they were such flakes and bad employees beforehand?

And you bf might as well forget about ever Refering anyone to work there again because the hire ups won't thinks his candidates have value.

 

[Jasmataz]

I'd let her know not to come to me for anymore job related help. I'd also tell her that I don't want to hear her complain about needing a job.

 

[celiabug]

Yes. Say something and let them know that you and your bf will not be giving anymore references/ hookups with jobs.

Did you guys know they were such flakes and bad employees beforehand?

And you bf might as well forget about ever Refering anyone to work there again because the hire ups won't thinks his candidates have value.

No we didn't know because they had just moved here and we didn't know much of their work history.

 

[nlamr2013]

I feel like I wouldnt have let my bf put his neck out there for them. I am sure this isnt their first signs of flakiness. uhm theres nothing to say but have fun being unemployed and dont think I'll pull any strings for you again.

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

No we didn't know because they had just moved here and we didn't know much of their work history.

Never do that again mmmk. Even if they are family if you don't know someone's work history and you don't know if they are professional or dependent then don't refer them to jobs.

You should analyze referring someone to job the same way that you analyze deciding to consign on a loan for someone.

 

[Keen]

No we didn't know because they had just moved here and we didn't know much of their work history.

Same sister you just met and she was using you to lie to your mom? I agree with the above posters. Just let her know they made someone else who was trying to help them look bad and don't expect any more recommendations from you.

 

[Foxglove]

You can say something but it probably won't make any difference. Do they have a history of irresponsible behavior? He shouldn't have stuck his neck out unless he was sure they wouldn't embarrass him. Now this will make him look bad

 

[celiabug]

You can say something but it probably won't make any difference. Do they have a history of irresponsible behavior? He shouldn't have stuck his neck out unless he was sure they wouldn't embarrass him. Now this will make him look bad

I haven't noticed that type of behavior but they were so excited to start the job I can't believe that they actually did this.

 

[celiabug]

They've been at my place all day and I haven't really said anything to then because they keep making excuses like "this job isn't for me" "they aren't flexible enough" and my sister keeps saying she wishes my bf never got them the job because now she feels bad. She decided to work the rest of the week then quit.

 

[Bklynqueen]

Wow, they are an ungrateful bunch. OP, you need to let them know not to ask you for anything again, they seriously need to grow up. I know your SO is pissed!

 

[celiabug]

Wow, they are an ungrateful bunch. OP, you need to let them know not to ask you for anything again, they seriously need to grow up. I know your SO is pissed!

My SO is a really quiet guy and doesn't like conflict so I know He's not going to say anything about it that's why I want to let them know that they were being ungrateful about it.

 

[LiftedUp]

I understand why you are upset. I would've told them about it. He put his credibility on the line for them.

 

[BKbeauty]

Maybe this is why God never gave me siblings. I would have WENT IN on their a**es. I mean full blown cuss out. How dare they use your BF like that and then not have a care in the world about how their juvenile behaviour affects him. I would be livid.

 

[Keshieshimmer]

They've been at my place all day and I haven't really said anything to then because they keep making excuses like "this job isn't for me" "they aren't flexible enough" and my sister keeps saying she wishes my bf never got them the job because now she feels bad. She decided to work the rest of the week then quit.

At least your sister kinda feels some remorse.

 

[Keen]

I can't believe she is quitting because her boyfriend quite. Now both of them don't have a job.

 

[Lilmama1011]

see that's why people don't like to put their name out like that. i hear tons of people say they dont refer anybody fearing their name will be stomped on, i don't blame them

 

[ms.mimi]

They've been at my place all day and I haven't really said anything to then because they keep making excuses like "this job isn't for me" "they aren't flexible enough" and my sister keeps saying she wishes my bf never got them the job because now she feels bad. She decided to work the rest of the week then quit.

I would apologized to bf and let him know that will NEVER happen on your watch again. I wouldn't say a word to sis and her man. If sis is staying with you I would let her know she's got to go. If they visiting they still gotta go. How dare they come to your house with anything less than "I'm an idiot and I'm sorry"!:hardslap:

 

[*CherryPie*]

What kind of job is it?

 

[Mortons]

What kind of sense does it make to quit the job cause someone else did and now there is NO family income? Reminds me of my ex...and let me tell you that story played out horribly.

I would apologize to my bf and I would let me sister know I would not be sticking my neck out for her in any capacity again.

 

[celiabug]

What kind of job is it?

It was a good job! $9.50 an hour 40 hrs every week and all you had to do was answer emails all day. His rent was only $200 a week and he has nothing else to do with his life at all.

 

[PJaye]

I'd let her know not to come to me for anymore job related help. I'd also tell her that I don't want to hear her complain about needing a job.

This! I would also add that she not breathe a word about her money woes in my presence; and she cannot ever ask to borrow money.

 

[Mortons]

It was a good job! $9.50 an hour 40 hrs every week and all you had to do was answer emails all day. His rent was only $200 a week and he has nothing else to do with his life at all.

Shoot they hiring for part time? I answer emails all dang day from clients for free.

 

[celiabug]

So my sister texted me today telling me she couldn't get up this morning and that she quits and she told me she was sorry cuz she feels bad. I told her don't apologize to me, apologize to my SO.

She did but I'm still really mad. Should I just get over it now?And I'm really starting to dislike her boyfriend because he is seriously the laziest person ever and people were telling her for the longest that he ain't about shiz.

 

[Ganjababy]

Just leave it. Learn and never put you or your bf in this situation again. If she complains about anything job (less) related or how hard she has it then lay into her...

So my sister texted me today telling me she couldn't get up this morning and that she quits and she told me she was sorry cuz she feels bad. I told her don't apologize to me, apologize to my SO.

She did but I'm still really mad. Should I just get over it now?And I'm really starting to dislike her boyfriend because he is seriously the laziest person ever and people were telling her for the longest that he ain't about shiz.

 

[ms.mimi]

You making her apologize to SO was a good move. Especially since he's not the type to say anything.

That's ok. This is a lesson for everyone. Like another poster said they could NEVER complain about being broke, needing a job, job leads, financial help, etc.....cause I would throw it dead in their face. I know most young people don't do this kind of thing cause it seems mean but old school folks do! It may hurt but it works cause it's truth!
She's grown and who she hangs with is her business (problem). But studies show in order to improve your life it's imperative to improve your social circles. You can tell her this until you're blue in the face but unleast she wants to improve herself, you are wasting your breath.

It's totally understandable that you're still angry. I get it. I would be steamed for atleast a few days. Your man, his job, your sister, her man, his influence on her, etc... But life has a way of working things out.

 

[*CherryPie*]

Yeah, they need to apologize. So, I guess, they'd rather be broke. Y'all better not let them borrow any money either! ...cause you know they are coming.

It was a good job! $9.50 an hour 40 hrs every week and all you had to do was answer emails all day. His rent was only $200 a week and he has nothing else to do with his life at all.

 

[biancaelyse]

These people sound more like children than adults. I don't understand asking family to help you get a job and then being a rotten employee once you get the job. I guess it comes down to your values. This is why I don't give references unless I really know the person and have a good sense of their abilities and woek ethic.

You should speak to them and clear the air. Let them know how you feel and that you won't be helping them land anywhere else.