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Naturals...I am Debating Texlaxing or Relaxing...PLEASE STOP ME!

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ScandalousBeauty

ScandalousBeauty

New Member
It's when I go to Church that makes it hard!!! It was like this even when I was relaxed. I see all these gorgeous styles and I want my hair DONE. Not twists, not twist outs, not fuzzy WGO's, but a sleek, sexy wrap or a hot up-do. And y'all have NO IDEA how much I miss my at home weekly roller sets and rods! :sad: I love the thickness of my hair and all as a natural, and I have figured out alot.

I am seriously considering going back to my old ways! I don't want to press my hair or do any of that to receive "relaxed" results, and I do NOT want to run from rain, sleet, snow or humidity.

HELP!!!!!
 
I feel like my natural hair has afforded me greater ease of styling. Rain, sleet, humidity is no longer an issue. I too suffer from extremely frizzy hair but it's something that I've come to accept. Have you tried using anti-frizz procuct such as HE non of your frizziness? why do you feel like you can't do a sleek up do? The only obstacle that I can see right now may be length. Maybe you shoud revisit why you decided to go natural in the first place. Why are you against any styles that simulate relaxed hair (IMO that's having the best of both worlds)? Being able to switch back and forth is one of the advantages of natural hair.
 
LilChocolateMa said:
It's when I go to Church that makes it hard!!! It was like this even when I was relaxed. I see all these gorgeous styles and I want my hair DONE. Not twists, not twist outs, not fuzzy WGO's, but a sleek, sexy wrap or a hot up-do. And y'all have NO IDEA how much I miss my at home weekly roller sets and rods! :sad: I love the thickness of my hair and all as a natural, and I have figured out alot.

I am seriously considering going back to my old ways! I don't want to press my hair or do any of that to receive "relaxed" results, and I do NOT want to run from rain, sleet, snow or humidity.

HELP!!!!!
Click to expand...

Based on your post, it sounds like you want to relax your hair. You've listed more reasons that you want to relax it, than reasons you want to keep it natural.
If I'm supposed to be convincing you to stay natural, then I say focus on that thickness, mama.... and how much you :love: it!

why are you opposed to just acheiving the relaxed look without relaxing?
 
I love love love my natural hair. When I thought I had straightend my hair when I bleached it I cried. I love the being able to drive with the top down and my hair not messing up, today it is raining and I don't have to worry about the rain.

Try just getting your hair lightly pressed or flat ironed. Stop the madness you will want to revert. Think about it, but we support you either way.
 
LilChocolateMa said:
It's when I go to Church that makes it hard!!! It was like this even when I was relaxed. I see all these gorgeous styles and I want my hair DONE. Not twists, not twist outs, not fuzzy WGO's, but a sleek, sexy wrap or a hot up-do. And y'all have NO IDEA how much I miss my at home weekly roller sets and rods! :sad: I love the thickness of my hair and all as a natural, and I have figured out alot.

I am seriously considering going back to my old ways! I don't want to press my hair or do any of that to receive "relaxed" results, and I do NOT want to run from rain, sleet, snow or humidity.

HELP!!!!!
Click to expand...

I know how you feel. I miss my rollerset and wraps without alot of heat. I too am tired of braids, twists, and twist/outs. I know I'm suppose to be talking you out of this. :perplexed I'm sorry I can't help right now. :look:
 
LilChocolateMa said:
It's when I go to Church that makes it hard!!! It was like this even when I was relaxed. I see all these gorgeous styles and I want my hair DONE. Not twists, not twist outs, not fuzzy WGO's, but a sleek, sexy wrap or a hot up-do. And y'all have NO IDEA how much I miss my at home weekly roller sets and rods! :sad: I love the thickness of my hair and all as a natural, and I have figured out alot.

I am seriously considering going back to my old ways! I don't want to press my hair or do any of that to receive "relaxed" results, and I do NOT want to run from rain, sleet, snow or humidity.

HELP!!!!!
Click to expand...

You can have sleek, sexy hair as a natural. Celebrities like Gabriel Union and Jada Pinkett are natural and they have sleekest, sexiest hair out there! You can roller set and wrap too. It is just all down to the technic. It will take around the same amount of time to do relaxed, or natural--but if you relax you can't go back to the soft, beautiful, textured coils/curls that you fell in love with when you went natural. Believe me, if you put a rinse on your hair, rollerset it, and then flat iron you won't worry about humidity, or a sprinkle of rain. And at the end of the day, you can just wash it and have your beautiful, healthy, coily/curly hair back.

If I was you, I would try to press it, and rock that style for a while. If it's not you, and you aren't missing your natural hair, then relax it. It can't hurt to try it. :grin:
 
Well, I'm mostly scared that if I press it again, it will be permanently straight. The last time I got it straightened, the whole back of my head had heat damage, and now it's permanently straightened. I don't want this to happen somewhere more noticable, where it won't hold twists anymore. I think I will find my really old posts, the ones where I decided to transition. Good idea!

fabiennd said:
I feel like my natural hair has afforded me greater ease of styling. Rain, sleet, humidity is no longer an issue. I too suffer from extremely frizzy hair but it's something that I've come to accept. Have you tried using anti-frizz procuct such as HE non of your frizziness? why do you feel like you can't do a sleek up do? The only obstacle that I can see right now may be length. Maybe you shoud revisit why you decided to go natural in the first place. Why are you against any styles that simulate relaxed hair (IMO that's having the best of both worlds)? Being able to switch back and forth is one of the advantages of natural hair.
Click to expand...
 
LilChocolateMa said:
Well, I'm mostly scared that if I press it again, it will be permanently straight. The last time I got it straightened, the whole back of my head had heat damage, and now it's permanently straightened. I don't want this to happen somewhere more noticable, where it won't hold twists anymore. I think I will find my really old posts, the ones where I decided to transition. Good idea!
Click to expand...

Have you tried rollersetting first and then doing a Dom. blowoup? Since your hair will be mostly straight from the rollerset you will use less heat to get it straighter.
 
I had one done and they didn't rollerset it. But I left in tears because they blew dry my whole head. It was awful! When I was relaxed, my stylist (or I) never used heat on my hair, unless I was under the dryer letting my rollerset dry. So when she pulled out a blowdryer, which we NEVER used, it was terrible! Anyway, I will contact my stylist and see if she will blow it out for me.

Until then, I will refer to these threads...
Straight Hair Natural's Support Guide
Naturals who straighten: What tips do you have?
How Do Naturals Keep Their Hair Straight?
Natural Hair and Pressing

fabiennd said:
Have you tried rollersetting first and then doing a Dom. blowoup? Since your hair will be mostly straight from the rollerset you will use less heat to get it straighter.
Click to expand...
 
If you want to texlax, then texlax. If that is what you *really* want, and it's not a just momentary whim. Just weigh the pros and cons and do what you like with your hair.

I was natural for 2 years and texlaxed a year ago. I like change.
 
Girl go buy a wig to wear for those 2 or so hours at church and call it a day. Do not put those chemicals in your hair if it is something you are not TOTALLY SURE about!
 
Yeah, maybe its PMS. I am going to try straightening and see how it works out for me. I have been thinking about this all day and I really don't want to lose my thickness and I really don't need anymore breakage! I know that relaxing will probably give me thin hair again, and I REALLY don't want that! I just have a feeling that I will regret relaxing. So, I won't do it. Well...not until I have waited a few more months, like 8 months, to see more potential.

When i was considering going natural, my main goal was to wear relaxed styles as a natural head. But, I never really did that, and I can't remember why! So, I'll just play around with my blow dryer and flat iron, curlformers and Redken Heat Glide. Wish me luck!

Oh and.............thanks! :yep:
 
I know how you feel on the rollersets. BUT I LOVE my natural hair. Nothing beats how thick it is. As a relaxed head it felt like I had three strands. Now I have a full lions mane! I get so many compliments on it and people telling me not to DARE put a relaxer on it. I don't run from the rain,humidity or have to worry about if my hair is too frizzy, BECAUSE IT IS! LOL! (I'm trying to be convincing...ok?) But seriously, just think about this. Your feelings are now but anything you do chemically to your hair is PERMANENT. If you don't mind doing the BC when you tire of the relaxed look, then go for it. It's about what YOU want.
 
It's definitely PMS. I was debating texlaxing all last week and I've been natural for 20 years.

However, I rollerset every 4 days and that gives me my fix. I would just like a more manageable wash and go but I do not want damage that might come if I use chemicals. Mine you since joining LHCF, I'm much more informed on how to care for it.

But I like the way the natural hair feels and looks...especially when it is dripping wet of the shower. DH loves to touch it then!
 
come to the other side:gotroasted:

lol joking!
i think u should stay natural and just get a dominican blowout if u want straight
 
LilChocolateMa, I was in the same place a few months ago. I was contemplating relaxing and cutting. Just hang in there. Maybe get a style that puts your hair away for a while so you don't have to think about it? I'm on week 6 with my weave and I'm glad I didn't do anything drastic.

ETA: With the Dominicans they usually don't rollerset naturals. I had my hair blowdried and then flat ironed. They tried to rollerset it but they couldn't get the hair flat on the roller. When I did it at home, a regular leave in or setting lotion wasn't enough. I had to use a heavier product. Maybe they just don't know that or don't have a product like that.
 
Last edited:
naturalgurl said:
I know how you feel on the rollersets. BUT I LOVE my natural hair. Nothing beats how thick it is. As a relaxed head it felt like I had three strands. Now I have a full lions mane! I get so many compliments on it and people telling me not to DARE put a relaxer on it. I don't run from the rain,humidity or have to worry about if my hair is too frizzy, BECAUSE IT IS! LOL! (I'm trying to be convincing...ok?) But seriously, just think about this. Your feelings are now but anything you do chemically to your hair is PERMANENT. If you don't mind doing the BC when you tire of the relaxed look, then go for it. It's about what YOU want.
Click to expand...

Right, I can do a bunch of things with my hair but it takes time for some people to become adjusted to it. If its gonna save you time and stress then relax or texlax but either way you're gonna encounter problems.
 
ebonylocs said:
If you want to texlax, then texlax. If that is what you *really* want, and it's not a just momentary whim. Just weigh the pros and cons and do what you like with your hair.

I was natural for 2 years and texlaxed a year ago. I like change.
Click to expand...
ITA!

Think long and hard and if its what you want go for it!
 
Yes girl. I felt the same way just this past week. I was so ready to relax that I went out and bought a box of relaxer (I haven't done this in almost 2 years). I became tired of my kinks and wanted some smoothness. My hair is very thick and unmanageable. Deep down, I know that I would regret if I did relax. I am still in the relaxed mode though. I don't know what I'm going to do. I know Natural hair is much for healthy and thicker for me, but on the other hand, I just want it to look guuud and sleek. It also seems to me I'm not seeing length and the last time I had length was when I had a relaxer. Ohh what's a girl to dooo! I think it just may be PMS. I'll probably get over it soon. :ohwell:
 
You wanna do what??? :hardslap:SNAP out of it!!!!

J/K, I'm soooo joking.
I agree with what someone else said, throw on a wig for a while and make sure it's what you want to do.
Definitely, weigh the pros and cons for you.
Nobody knows what's best for you better than you:yep:
 
LilChocolateMa said:
It's when I go to Church that makes it hard!!! It was like this even when I was relaxed. I see all these gorgeous styles and I want my hair DONE. Not twists, not twist outs, not fuzzy WGO's, but a sleek, sexy wrap or a hot up-do. And y'all have NO IDEA how much I miss my at home weekly roller sets and rods! :sad: I love the thickness of my hair and all as a natural, and I have figured out alot.

I am seriously considering going back to my old ways! I don't want to press my hair or do any of that to receive "relaxed" results, and I do NOT want to run from rain, sleet, snow or humidity.

HELP!!!!!
Click to expand...
I understand what you are saying. I was natural for 3 years (about) and just texlaxed a couple of months ago. My hair was getting so long but my hair is sooooooooo suuuuper thick it was a chore! So I texlaxed and it is still super thick and I can achieve a blown out natural look and do wash and gos but I can also do roller sets. i love it! and it is soo much easier.
In the end it's up to you. Thank goodness that it will grow out again if you change your mind. Good luck
 
LilChocolateMa said:
It's when I go to Church that makes it hard!!! It was like this even when I was relaxed. I see all these gorgeous styles and I want my hair DONE. Not twists, not twist outs, not fuzzy WGO's, but a sleek, sexy wrap or a hot up-do. And y'all have NO IDEA how much I miss my at home weekly roller sets and rods! :sad: I love the thickness of my hair and all as a natural, and I have figured out alot.

I am seriously considering going back to my old ways! I don't want to press my hair or do any of that to receive "relaxed" results, and I do NOT want to run from rain, sleet, snow or humidity.

HELP!!!!!
Click to expand...

Your hair can't be "done" with twists or twistouts?

If all of the styles that appeal to you are styles that require your hair to be "sleek" or straight, then maybe you can try a rollerset or slick bun? I don't know what your hair texture is, but it would be difficult for me to get "sleek" hairstyles without applying heat (or a LOT of manipulation) to my hair.

I LOVE being natural and feel so beautiful rocking my God given tresses. I love having nappy, kinky hair, and since I don't need my hair to be straight or sleek to feel like my hair is done, I have no desire to relax or texlax my hair. I love the ease of natural hair and it is very low maintenence for me, so I can focus on doing things that I enjoy in life without my hair getting in the way.
 
I am texlaxed..but I hate rollersetting:look:

I have come to love bantu knots after washing.. then the next day... wala curls!

I say do what you feel..it is your hair and you have to make the decision to wear your hair. I just found that bone straight relaxers are not for me at all.
 
Before you use the relaxer, have you tried doing temporary straightening with heat. I normally press my hair; but a couple of weeks ago, I discovered that I can get my hair silky straight with Curlformers and my hair dryer:yep:. Maybe you should give it a try before you relax your hair.
I wish you the best with what ever you decide.
 
I have been natural since 2005. I love my natural hair because it give me many options. (Afro, straight, curls, braid outs, etc)
If you want some of the styles maybe you should flat iron your hair with a great protection serum that also helps to give an even straighter result and attempt to style the hair from there. This always works for me.
HTH.
 
Pinskates-WHOA missy....you came in here talkin' all that smack about how gorgeous your hair can get...the whole board already knows that your hair is the sheeeeeit!!! :grin: Now, please be a dear and update your fotki pw on your profile so we can stalk it, and I MUST learn your blow drying technique ASAP, I just got my brand spankin' new blowdryer today!!! Thanks boo! :evillaugh:

Sunshine0801-IMO, my hair isn't sexy in twists or a puff. When I decided to go natural, I never wanted twists, puffs or anything like that. I wanted a press every two weeks. I just miss sleek hair. But I did blow dry today and flat iron, and I am HIGHLY satisfied!!! I got the sleekness that I wanted, but my ends are ragged so I have to get a professional trim before I wear my hair out and about. I'm still happy though...Yaaaaaaaay!!


pinkskates said:
Before you use the relaxer, have you tried doing temporary straightening with heat. I normally press my hair; but a couple of weeks ago, I discovered that I can get my hair silky straight with Curlformers and my hair dryer:yep:. Maybe you should give it a try before you relax your hair.
I wish you the best with what ever you decide.
Click to expand...
 
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