Men & Texting

[Britt]

they way how women run their mouths, if i was a man, i would text too. sorry if i stepped on anyone's toes.

but seriously, if a guy is really interested he will pick up the phone. (not dating)my marriage was built on emails and text messages. it was how my husband communicated. he was younger than me.

Oh lawd! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm a woman, and I simply canNOT take talking to people who can't get a clue and just run.off.at.the.mouth and can't pick up on non verbal clues that you are overwhelming the other person. My friend and I have a mutual friend who is like this and we swear it's one of the main reasons she's been perpetually single for so many years. She talks too gotdamn MUCH! She'll meet a dude, and each of them just automatically stop returning her calls. I can't imagine how it is for a man to deal w/ this. A lot of women don't know they talk to freakin much . This is a thread I haven't seen yet on this board but I think it's worth discussing.

In any event, I do agree that texting is not a way to get to know someone in the beginning. I know a lot of men don't like talking, but at least pick up the phone and chat for a few minutes when you want to get to know someone. Maybe sometimes the man will pick up the phone and want to talk for a few minutes, but for some women that's impossible, they will go on and on and on. If a guy is texting you, don't respond and pick up the phone and call him - hopefully he'll get a clue. If he doesn't then he's prob a waste of time - especially if he's not putting forth effort into seeing you.

 

[HAIRapy]

I cannot stand when men want to have an entire conversation on text. I understand that some women are ok with letting them get away with that mess, so I give them a chance to stop. I tell them up front that I refuse to have a full conversation via text and if he wants to talk to call me. If they continue, I ignore their texts. I can understand that sometimes, its better to text- but if you're not at work or something like that, I'd be kinda insulted if they only wanted to text. It's so impersonal.

Sent from my Samsung Epic using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

NEVER AGAIN! Dude started off texting and never stopped. He was able to be more "bold" with his approach, I doubt he would say any of those things to my face. And once, I called him, cause I didn't want to text, and he asked me "What made you call?" WTF?! *sigh* See, I should have known then (lol) I won't be making that mistake again...

 

[bellatiamarie]

Seriously, this is probably one of my biggest pet peeves..I absolutely hate it with a passion..Ive tried to be patient, but I cant do it..Its just being lazy in my opinion..You sitting on the couch texting, when you could be talking to me on the phone. It blurs the line of communication..You cant determine my tone of voice, if Im being sarcastic or playful or anything..Im notorious for asking them if they are busy, and if they say no...I'll dial that number..Imma make you talk, fool!
I cant coach men into taking the iniative and calling me...If we start off texting and we dont make that transition into phone calls, then Im done.."What you doing" and "LOL" can only go so far..You can never get to know me that way and in my mind, you not really trying to..

at the bolded... this is exactly what i do.

 

[TinyBlu]

A texter = a coward to me. Technology has ruined communication skills. I tried to date a guy (younger) that just wanted to text me all the time and it got old really quickly.

I think it takes a different kind of courage and manhood to step up and pick up the phone and call someone, and I have no respect for someone that can only use cyberspace to communicate.

I make it clear up front now that texting doesn't work for me. I'm not a big phone person either, but in my experience.... constant texters usually don't have that much to say anyway. Obviously they are limited to 160 characters. No thanks!!

Remember the good ole days when you actually WROTE your number on a sheet of paper (not store it in your cell phone) and gave it to a guy. Then he was DONE if he lost it?

Remember when he would call you on a phone that was actually hooked into a phone jack in the wall of your house, and if he didn't get you he left a message on your answering machine? Nothing felt better than to see that light flashing and hit the playback button to hear his voice.... MAN I MISS THOSE DAYS!!!!!

 

[TinyBlu]

You're right.

I did this with the last guy I met. He called the next day. Then went right back to texting.

I took that to mean he wasn't THAT interested and stopped wasting my time.

OMG!!! The same thing happened to me!!! I nicely mentioned that I preferred organic communication, and he called me ONCE. Then he went back to texting. He tried the "I prefer to talk face to face" nonsense on me, yet he would only show up every couple of weeks.

I just got tired of the whole thing and conveniently forgot to respond to his texts... GROW UP!!!!!

 

[Lucie]

I am not a fan of texting when it comes to dating. Even married. I am not saying a man has to call me 24/7 but it speaks volumes about how he feels. When you really, really dig someone all you want to do is SPEAK to them. Not BBM. Not text. SPEAKING is key.

 

[Glamorous_chic]

i wasn't a fan of texting either, but i've grown comfortable with it, but it can't replace actual conversations. but whenever i hear people complain about it and say its being lazy, and technology is the end of communication, i wonder what did people say when the phone was invented, and instead of having face to face conversations people started calling. i wonder if people felt having phone conversations was lazy and cowardly instead of taking the time to have actual personal contact.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

I don't think that texting in itself is really the problem. I think most women here are complaining because texting is pretty much ALL the guy is doing.

If we're talking on the phone 3+ times a week, then if the guy chooses to text me as well throughout the week, then I'm cool with that.

But if a guy is TEXTING me 3+ times a week, and NEVER calling, or is initiating MOST of his contact to me through virtual/text message, then I'm sorry...but he's got to go.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

i wasn't a fan of texting either, but i've grown comfortable with it, but it can't replace actual conversations. but whenever i hear people complain about it and say its being lazy, and technology is the end of communication, i wonder what did people say when the phone was invented, and instead of having face to face conversations people started calling. i wonder if people felt having phone conversations was lazy and cowardly instead of taking the time to have actual personal contact.

Yea...I understand what you're trying to say.

I mean, that probably happened when the telephone was invented too!

But I think most people tend to be upset because texting takes about the same amount (if not MORE) time and effort than a simple phone call. Whereas, actually driving over to go see someone face-to-face vs. phone calling is completely different imo. Driving and planning face-to-face time actually DOES take more time and effort. But with texting, it is actually EASIER to make a phone call than it is to text. I think that's what gets us women so frustrated with it!

Texting USED to be for short, brief, simple, emergency messages ONLY. But now it's sadly turned into many people's main forms of communication.

JMHO.

 

[Truth]

Y'all are making me feel bad....

I can't necessarily be mad at him because, I started it. I have never really been into talking on the phone, its just annoying. I actually prefer to face to face conversation. But we can kind of text over the course of the day and the conversation never ends. When we do get together, we talk for hours on end. maybe its just me...

Don't feel bad cause i'm right here with you. I dislike phone conversations... Hell you're lucky if I answer the phone. SO and I began with texting, even in the "getting to know" phase. We talked on the phone all of 2 to 3 times maybe if that. It wasn't his choice it was mine. I'm simply not a phone person. It's either face to face or through text. We do have phone conversations more now then we did then, but for the most part we text due to schedules and face to face conversations....we got to know each other just fine via text..