Men & How They Cope With Death

[FemmeFatale]

How do men cope with death and what are some ways that you were able to comfort them? I'm going through this now with a friend (well more than a friend) and I don't know what to do. On the outside he seems ok and is handling all the affairs but I'm afraid that he's keeping everything bottled up inside . Any advice?

 

[yardyspice]

My dh is just dealing with the death of his father -- seven years later. I thought he was strong, etc. but he had just bottled it up inside. I suggest a grief counselor or group if possible or good old fashioned public wailing. I don't think it is a good idea to keep the loss and pain bottled up under the guise of being "strong". We all need to grieve.

How do men cope with death and what are some ways that you were able to comfort them? I'm going through this now with a friend (well more than a friend) and I don't know what to do. On the outside he seems ok and is handling all the affairs but I'm afraid that he's keeping everything bottled up inside . Any advice?

 

[divachyk]

My dh lost his grandmother a few years ago to cancer AND it was during the time he too was battling cancer. Praises to God dh overcame his cancer struggle. He dealt with it through shedding tears but not many. He didn't care to talk about it much. For the most part, he internalized the grief while in my presence but cried in private moments. I think they deal with grief but they just don't allow others to see it. I inquired to my dh had he grieved and he shared he cried privately but its not something he cared to do in my presence although he did breakdown a few times when the emotions became too much to keep in.

 

[mjsliberiangrl]

An old thread but bumping because I could take any advice on this that you ladies could provide.

 

[Kiowa]

It depends....my baby brother lost his wife 3 years ago to cancer..she was 31...they have been together since high school, and she left a 8yr old at the time to raise. He is still grieving...for a time there I was really worried about him. He wasn't open to therapy, and his daughter was carrying him emotional - he couldn't bring himself to date either. He felt like it would be cheating on her.He has focused his self on raising his child, I have taught him how to do braids, and basic hair care for his daughter, and he is slowly coming around. But he has keep most of his emotions inside- to this day - I cannot imagine losing a spouse, or SO - on the outside he is coping, but inside he still hurts at his loss...

 

[shespoison]

An old thread but bumping because I could take any advice on this that you ladies could provide.

This thread scared me. My SO just lost his father and I feel the same way....he did cry for a moment after he found out, but since then business as usual.

 

[mjsliberiangrl]

My SO just lost his grandma 2 months ago, who he's lived with for ten years. They lived alone and he came back from school to an empty home. Seeing him so lethargic and discouraged is heartbreaking. He is struggling so much. I wish I could do something to ease the pain. Its taking a lot out of me as well, just seeing him suffer in silence is some of the worst pain I'VE ever felt. I know everyone deals with grief differently so I am just trying to be there as much as I can and read between the lines (he's the type to hate asking for too much, if he feels he may be a burden in anyway). My SO is extremely sensitive and cried at the very thought of her passing whenever it came up in convo for years so, I know this is eating him up inside.