Married and still in love??

Are you married and still in love?

  • Yes

    Votes: 63 76.8%

  • No

    Votes: 19 23.2%
  • Total voters
    82
  • Poll closed .
All of these stories are beautiful and I would love to be able to say that as time has gone by our love has gotten stronger. However, I'm one of the ladies that voted no. Without a lengthy explanation, I've tried every thing in my power to create a happy loving environment for me and my husband. But in the past couple of months, I have realized that my idea of a happy marriage is not the same as his. He has remained bitter and stuck in his past (years of emotional and physical abuse). He purposely creates drama in the relationship and accuses me of being the cause of our problems. He is stuck on being a victim for the rest of his life. I had so much love for this man, but now I can't imagine living the rest of my life stuck with him.
 
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:hug3: AbbyGail - I'm so sorry to hear that - but that is another true side of marriage. Thank you for sharing it.
 
hugs to you AbbyGail. i really hope you do not slide into his sinkhole; it sounds very deep. my wish for you -to rise above it all, and stay unbroken.
((((hugs))))again.
 
Hugs Abbygail

Been together 14 years-married for 12 and still madly in love with my husband. We have had our hard times for sure, there were times where I have wanted to leave and he has literally stood in my way. He had never given up ever. He is a good man. He thinks I am the most beautiful woman in the world. When I met him I was a single Mom to a little boy, he tells people that he met me fell in love with me and then fell in love with my little boy.

Okay mind you my DH is Blond with blue eyes my 1st child is not biracial, do you know to this day my DH refers to our first child as my son, in 14 years he has never ever said my step child but my son- he also legally adopted him.

Okay back to being in love, this is the only man besides my father that has ever kept his promise. He is an excellent, dad, provider and husband. I feel so blessed because our kids know that their parents are deeply in love. Recently I had a health scare and I was actually so worried about him because he just broke down and said that he can't lose me. He is so good to me. To this day his eyes devour me, extra weight and all. I love him so much and I am so thankful to have such a wonderful husband.
 
I love my husband and we've been together for 9 years. After having my heart broken a few times in relationships, I have learned to be pretty level-headed and to think like a man, so I would hardly describe myself as being in love. I always felt like if something happened to DH, I would mourn, then I would start dating and I would marry again.

However,

Last week, DH said to me totally out of the blue: if something were to happen to you, I don't think I could ever be with another woman, and he looked like he meant it too. I was so shocked he said that, and so embarrassed that I couldn't say that I felt the same toward him. :blush: That was truly the most romantic thing he had ever said to me, and these past few days, I have been looking back at all the wonderful things this man has done for me, and all the ways he has grown and mature to be the best husband, provider and father he can be, and I really felt waves of love toward him. Yes, I can say I am in love. If something were to happen to him, I don't know what I would do...
 
Been together for almost 10yrs (damn, time flies!!). Our relationship gets better and better as we grow older together.
 
*tears* Wow. I didnt think any of this existed anymore. For a time I only thought this existed in romance novels and romance films but never in reality. Thank you all the older ladies for sharing that with a young girl. I hope one day I am as blessed as all of you. Thanks for letting me know that this is possible. :-)
 
Will be married for 7 years in October...we have had our ups and downs but as of this post my husband gets 2 :up: :up: from me. :love3:
 
SelfStyled said:
Hugs Abbygail

Been together 14 years-married for 12 and still madly in love with my husband. We have had our hard times for sure, there were times where I have wanted to leave and he has literally stood in my way. He had never given up ever. He is a good man. He thinks I am the most beautiful woman in the world. When I met him I was a single Mom to a little boy, he tells people that he met me fell in love with me and then fell in love with my little boy.

Okay mind you my DH is Blond with blue eyes my 1st child is not biracial, do you know to this day my DH refers to our first child as my son, in 14 years he has never ever said my step child but my son- he also legally adopted him.

Okay back to being in love, this is the only man besides my father that has ever kept his promise. He is an excellent, dad, provider and husband. I feel so blessed because our kids know that their parents are deeply in love. Recently I had a health scare and I was actually so worried about him because he just broke down and said that he can't lose me. He is so good to me. To this day his eyes devour me, extra weight and all. I love him so much and I am so thankful to have such a wonderful husband.
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Self-Styled, your story is so beautiful. The bolded describes my dh as well. Everytime I have wanted to give up he has stood in my way, he has never given up on us.

EbonyYoungin517 said:
*tears* Wow. I didnt think any of this existed anymore. For a time I only thought this existed in romance novels and romance films but never in reality. Thank you all the older ladies for sharing that with a young girl. I hope one day I am as blessed as all of you. Thanks for letting me know that this is possible. :-)
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And for me anyway most days are not like a romance novel, most days are just living day to day, working through issues, taking care of the kids, paying bills, etc. But you know we have had many moments that have felt like a romance novel, he has surprised me and done things for me that I don't talk much about because I don't want people to think I'm bragging or lying. So I keep most of it to myself. Some people think young and new love is the best but I will tell you there is nothing like a man who has loved you for a very long time, has seen you give birth, ignores it when you gain weight, always finds a way to get you whatever you want, and the way they look at you after you've been together for awhile just melts your heart.

ETA: EbonyYoungin, yes it is very possible:yep:.
 
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Thanks Abby for stepping up first to admit that you are married and not in love. I voted no as well. I won't go into details because I want ladies reading this thread to focus on the positive comments.

We been married for 7 years. I love him, but far far from being in love. He's is a product of divorced parents and an abusive unloving prick of a father. He's beyond damaged and getting worse. My husband and I get along, but not on the same page as far as marriage. He does nothing to make me say "I'm in love." Honestly, it will be a miracle is we make it past 10 years. But, the good woman that I am still tries. *Shrugs*
 
10 years last Friday and yes, he's great. We're great.
We're DINKs so not sure if that has anything to do with it.
 
~~HoneyComb~~ said:
Married for over 16 years and yes, DH and I are still in love with each other and married life.

He asked me recently if I felt I had made the right choice in marrying him, because he said he had been thinking about me and he felt he had made the best choice in a wife. I feel the same, I couldn't imagine being with anyone else. We have become a unified team and we are on the same page with almost everything.

There has been ups and downs, it hasn't always been smooth sailing due to the fact that we can both be stubborn, and the regular stresses of life; but we realize that selfishness has no room in our marriage and being considerate of each of our needs is a priority.

We are getting older and we just want to enjoy each other's company and be a part of each other's life, life is too short, we don't know how long we're going to have with each other, but we don't want to waste it on a bunch of nonsense.
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That's wonderful!

DH and I are still at that stage and we're a great team as you and your dh are. I pray that we continue to be that way. Lately, I've been feeling so much love for him. I am truly blessed to have him. I love that man! :lick:
 
~~HoneyComb~~ said:
Married for over 16 years and yes, DH and I are still in love with each other and married life.

He asked me recently if I felt I had made the right choice in marrying him, because he said he had been thinking about me and he felt he had made the best choice in a wife. I feel the same, I couldn't imagine being with anyone else. We have become a unified team and we are on the same page with almost everything.

There has been ups and downs, it hasn't always been smooth sailing due to the fact that we can both be stubborn, and the regular stresses of life; but we realize that selfishness has no room in our marriage and being considerate of each of our needs is a priority.

We are getting older and we just want to enjoy each other's company and be a part of each other's life, life is too short, we don't know how long we're going to have with each other, but we don't want to waste it on a bunch of nonsense.
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I've been married for almost 12yrs and totally agree w/the bolded!!!
 
I am more in love w/ my husband today at (almost) 11yrs of marriage than I have been at any point in our relationship. Funny thing is, I was just telling him this last night! LOL

After watching him grow, from a teen, to the father of my children and a good husband/provider, I'll take it a step farther and say that I am also more proud of him now than I have ever been. :)
 
JustKiya said:
Awwww, indeed!! I can't wait to get to where you ladies are!!

Married five years, and in all honesty, it's just been the last year/year&half or so that I've seen a glimpse of the promised land of that deep, longlasting love that eHarmony talks about. :lachen: I've had my moments of thinking of an alibi, too, and cursing myself for watching enough CSI to know I would be screwed (:look: :lachen:). But, more and more, as the days go by (even as our life is far from perfect), the deeper in love I become.
That was one thing I never expected - I really thought that the newlywed love would be the deepest it would get - but it's just the tip of the iceberg. My heart has grown bigger to hold the love I have for him. :infatuated:
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It took us five years to even get to that point, so you're doing good:yep::lachen:
 
10 years today!!!

And it's so great, I can't even describe it. It really does get better, it does, it does. I agree with everything the ladies have said here. It's work, but if you stick it out, it's worth it. Now, we're just like, we're here, we're together, that's it.
 
Happy Anniversay Z.

I've been married almost 10 years. Today I'm more inlove than I was 10 years ago. What we had all those years ago don't make a dent in what we have today. I'M IN LOVE!
 
1Aleeesha said:
. . . That doesn't mean that I have never been angry enough with him to start thinking about an alibi :giggle: but through and through we are in love.
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Mini mimi said:
married 15 years. G-d has showed us how to stay faithful and in love..
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hopeful said:
Everytime I have wanted to give up he has stood in my way, he has never given up on us.
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All of the above.

15 years this Nov - Together for 17. Doesn't mean there have not been issues. The amazing thing about a marriage that is God-Blessed is this:

  1. It goes through seasons - you just have to know which one you are in, and understand the others are a part of the process
  2. After a tough season (when you are looking for an alibi or a divorce lawyer), you realize the battle was worth it and the two of you are tougher/stronger.
  3. After a tragic season (death, sickness, loss), you are closer because you weathered it together.
  4. You watch the jobs change, houses change, children grow, hairlines recede :lachen:, booties turn to mo-booties - and realize your best friend was there to share it all.

It is truly a wonderful thing. There are a LOT of wonderful marriages out there.
 
I have been married for close to 9 years. 2 girls (an almost 3 year old and a 1 year old) and we have another girl on the way. I am still very much in love. I wrote in another post how DH was just staring at me and asked me how long its been. And we both felt that it hasn't felt that long. I feel very blessed to have him. He takes good care of me and the girls. Yes we have been through some valleys, but we seem to get better and better with time.
 
dlewis said:
Happy Anniversay Z.

I've been married almost 10 years. Today I'm more inlove than I was 10 years ago. What we had all those years ago don't make a dent in what we have today. I'M IN LOVE!
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OMG that is exactly how we feel now!!!!
 
Zaynab said:
10 years today!!!

And it's so great, I can't even describe it. It really does get better, it does, it does. I agree with everything the ladies have said here. It's work, but if you stick it out, it's worth it. Now, we're just like, we're here, we're together, that's it.
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Happy Anniversary.
 
me me meeeee! I'm still in love! I lovvvvvve being in love! i don't talk much about my marraige. i keep it secret just between us. we really believe in privacy and keeping people out of our biz. i think this is one reason why we are soooo happy and have much peace in our marraige!!! :):):)
 
Aww, the answers in this thread are so sweet!! And I also appreciate the realism, from both those who are in love and those whose relationships are faltering. I wish each of you the best in your marriages & your lives.
 
DarkVictory said:
Yes. Yesterday was our 20th anniversary. We married one year to the day after our first date. See his post here: http://gvdub.livejournal.com/2008/06/04/

And mine here:
http://users.livejournal.com/_darkvictory/2009/06/04/
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He sounds so sweet and really happy to be with you!

Southern Belle said:
Meeeee!!! 13 years here! :grin:

I could still (as my grandma used to say) "eat him with a spoon"! :spinning:
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LOL sometimes I want to beat him with a spoon :lol:. But I still love mine too. Our 22nd wedding anniversary is coming up next month.
 
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