Kindergarten girl with phony pony...Fell off at school!!!

[NeeSee]

I really hate that for her. How dare the teacher say she didn't know what to do. I was in Target last week and I saw this little white girl about 2 begging her mom for one. They had it in the sections where the children clothes are. So the little girl picked it up and placed it on top of her head and was begging her mom for it. Her mom looked at me with so much embarrassment on her face. I think we have went to far with the weave. I don't think that's something that a 5 year old should be wearing.

 

[moniquekirk]

I teach Kindergarten and I must say that out of my 13 black girls, 9 of them wear weave all the time!! It is so pitiful. They were kinky twist, those crochet braids, micros and one even had a sew in!! I think it is so unhealthy!


http://public.fotki.com/moniquekirk

 

[NeeSee]

That's really sad



Because we all know these mothers aren't making their daughters wear fake hair as a protective style. (A protective style doesn't need fake hair anyway)
At 5, the child is going to think that putting on fake hair is just something that people 'have to do', like wearing clothes, and going to school.
And that's not right is it?

I agree and at that age she may develop a complex about her natural hair. That is simply teaching her that something is wrong with her "real" hair and she will grow with this negative image.

 

[Blossssom]

I agree and at that age she may develop a complex about her natural hair. That is simply teaching her that something is wrong with her "real" hair and she will grow with this negative image.

You know it, Adrian, you know it!

 

[mahoganee]

I think the fake hair/weave phenomenon for school age children is really sad, simply a quick fix and a set up to hate yourself at a very young age.

I believe certain rights and freedom come with a certain age. Fake/Weaved up hair is one of them in my opinion.

ITA. I just thought that little girls in pageants wore them. I remember incidents in high school where girls ponies either fell off during class or one of the hellion boys would snatch it off of the girl's head and play keep away with it. They were ridiculed for it for a while so I can just imagine how this baby feels.

 

[sholly6]

I see it all the time. My daughter is one of the only black children that wear her own hair in her class. I wonder what we are teaching our children by allowing them to wear fake hair and nails at such a young age. What type of damage are we doing?

I think your mother did the right thing. I don't know what I would have done in that situation.

I feel sorry the girl however, can I have the recipe the cake on your page? it look great.

 

[misskris816]

wow, I had no idea girls that young are wearing fake hair. That's really sad, actually. At such a young age they are being conditioned to not like their natural hair...so sad.

 

[Sweet C]

Well, I guess I have been blind, cause I have seen kids at 2 and 3 with phony ponies in the area I currently live in now, and that is the NORM for a lot of AA children!!!! Most of the kids that young I have seen with phony ponies usually have really small ones done with some of the scraps from mom's weave, and they are put in pretty well so that they don't fall off easily. And with the experience I have had with here, I can see why. Most of the bw here have a really short cut or some sort of weave in at all times. So very few bw have experience in caring for their own hair, so they have a hard time with their children, due to lack of knowledge, so they essentially stick with what they know works for them which is the weave.

 

[eunique]

ITA. I just thought that little girls in pageants wore them. I remember incidents in high school where girls ponies either fell off during class or one of the hellion boys would snatch it off of the girl's head and play keep away with it. They were ridiculed for it for a while so I can just imagine how this baby feels.

That's the same thing I was thinking. I'm in high school and I've had a phony-pony fall off at lunch and I just about died so I know it must have been terrible for the little girl.

 

[Southernbella.]

Personally It bothers me when I see young girls (anything under, say, 13) with ANY kind of fake hair. I know that combing a head full of hair daily can be time consuming to say the least, but I just think it's a great time to bond with your daughter and show her that she can manage/take care of her hair herself.

I have nieces whom I have NEVER seen their real hair. And to this day those girls hair is a hot mess (damaged) and they do not know how to style their natural hair. They know how to weave it up, braid it up, phony-pony it up, but that's it.

Maybe I'm old school, but I just remember how nice it was being between my mom's knees as she combed my hair. Sure, sometimes it hurt like heck because she wasn't using a wide-toothed comb but it was still kind of our special time. And I couldn't wait until I could start styling my hair myself -- MY hair. I didn't immediately think, "Oh, I'd better go to the BSS and get me some fake hair if I want to look good." I knew that my own hair could be made to look nice if I put the time in to style it.

Anyway, I don't mean to ramble, but I do think that kids learn lessons at early ages, and a lot of young girls are learning from their own parents that their own hair is impossible to groom without "special accoutrements."

Amen! My daughter will not be wearing anyone else's hair. What kind of pride does that instill? I mean, seriously, it's demeaning. I'm not saying the mother set out to demean her child, but that was the end result.

 

[crlsweetie912]

I feel sorry the girl however, can I have the recipe the cake on your page? it look great.

The recipe for the cake is in the Easter dinner thread in the cooking forum!

 

[santia]

OMG, That is sad and I feel for the little girl. As a parent I would NOT send my child to school with a phony pony. If she wants to wear pony hair she can get some braids.

The kids are alot meaner these days.

 

[anatomicallycorrect]

Awww, that's sad . I have a coworker w/a 7 year old and yes she will put tracks in her hair sometimes . Some of these people need to stop

 

[PaperClip]

After ponytails, then relaxers.... All of this empathy for this child sounds good now...but will this empathy be here if this thread had been about the this kindergartener's hair getting relaxed?

I don't want to see ANYBODY get programmed into relaxers for 30 years...like me....

 

[PinkSkates]

I think a 5 year old with a relaxer is just as sad and embarrassing as the 5 year old with a phony ponytail. It's disgusting! these poor littler black girls are learning to hate their hair before they even get a chance to see it. As far as I'm concerned it's a form of child abuse.

 

[CurleeDST]

that is really sad.

I see it all the time too at my daughter school. I'm just happy that it's not my daughter.

 

[FlowerHair]

I think a 5 year old with a relaxer is just as sad and embarrassing as the 5 year old with a phony ponytail. It's disgusting! these poor littler black girls are learning to hate their hair before they even get a chance to see it. As far as I'm concerned it's a form of child abuse.

I agree wholeheartedly.
This is another case of parents wanting their children to look grown and "cool" and maybe even stylish at an age where style and fashion should not be as important as healthy, comfortable and practical.

Fake hair and fake nails! My goodness! Why!? Besides, the chemicals involved in relaxers, hair glue and nail glue can't be healthy for a child's undeveloped body.

 

[motherx2esq]

That is embarrassing for anyone but why is it so BAD that we (parents) let our children, of any age, wear fake hair? My daughters, one is going to 8th grade and the other will be attending 1st grade in the fall. Both of my daughters were extensions or fake pony tails. Mainly my oldest wears fake pony tails. My youngest daughter has mid back length hair but there are days when I let her wear her hair braided with hair added. She is also the only black child in her class. The question was asked what we are teaching them. I do not think that allowing them to wear weave is hindering them or teaching them anything bad. Telling children that weave is a bad thing seems to borderline on hating. Why not just show them that some choose to wear it while others do not. Some women have such a problem with other women wearing weave that is just so shocking to me. Who cares what someone else has in their head? If it's not your thing, fine. My youngest daughter LOVES her natural hair. So to say that wearing weave is teaching them to hate their hair is silly. My daughter will come to me and ask for afro puffs one day and to have it pressed several days later. So I guess wanting straight hair when her hair is natually curly (beautiful thick curls) is a form of child abuse and teaching her to hate her hair? I wear weave as well but I love the texture and thickness of my hair I just want a change at times.

Notwithstanding, I do feel that the op's mother should have told the parent so that they are aware. Maybe the parents were not the one that did the child's hair and was not aware that is was not secure.

 

[chayil0427]

Wow, what a sad sad story. I can only imagine how painful that was for this little girl.

I just say shame on these mothers who step out looking like they spent 4 weeks at the salon and thier baby's hair is all bitten, dry, and chewed looking.

I'm so thankful that my mother always took great care of my hair and my niece and lil sis whom she is now raising have thick long beautiful hair.

Chayil

 

[PeopleTalkDaily]

OMG....
i wouldn't of known what to do..
Your mom handled that situation very well...

 

[chayil0427]

I must really be behind the times. I guess I'll have the only Black Amish children in town.

:::going off to find a horse and buggy:::

Girl, you too!...my daughter isn't getting a relaxer until she's old enough to be responsible for it and make the decision to relax with maturity.

Ain't gone be no (yes I said ain't gone be no) fake nails and weaves and makeup on my baby until she's grown and outta my hizouse and can pay for it herself.

I grew up with my grandmother and I was taught to care for my own hair, grow my own nails, speak softly, and wear my skirts to my knees. I'm thankful to GOD that I grew up like that cause now I'm a soft spoken lady with natural beauty. And that's what I want MY baby girl to be also!

 

[CurleeDST]

i agree with everything you said.

Girl, you too!...my daughter isn't getting a relaxer until she's old enough to be responsible for it and make the decision to relax with maturity.

Ain't gone be no (yes I said ain't gone be no) fake nails and weaves and makeup on my baby until she's grown and outta my hizouse and can pay for it herself.

I grew up with my grandmother and I was taught to care for my own hair, grow my own nails, speak softly, and wear my skirts to my knees. I'm thankful to GOD that I grew up like that cause now I'm a soft spoken lady with natural beauty. And that's what I want MY baby girl to be also!

 

[ShiShiPooPoo]

I see it a lot. I taught first grade last year and I have seen phony ponies, finger waves, quick weave, micros, etc. on children prek on up. Most of the girls don't have enough hair to even maintain these styles. Next I'm sure I'll see one of those 15 or 27 pieces or whatever they're called. It's a shame really.