Keep getting split ends. HALP

[Dare~to~Dream]

I also have a small patch of hair near my ear that is broken off. I remember I had a bump there a few year ago that was really itchy. I kept scratching and then afterwards I realized that area seemed shorter. I try my best to keep my hand away from it. Can you guys see it?

View attachment 500538

Any ideas on the broken patch? I feel like it’s been like that for about a year and a half and hasn’t really been growing in.

What stood out to me is that you had a itchy bump in your head that you scratched then your hair broke off and hasn't grown back since. When I read this I googled because what kind of itchy bump causes a person to lose their hair in this way? Have you been to a dermatologist? If not, in addition to the steps these ladies in the thread have given you, I would suggest making an appointment with one. Maybe even seeking out an appointment with trichologist would be helpful as well.

 

[GraceJones]

Once again as I look at your hair pictures, I am reminded of what I saw, felt and thought yesterday.You have thick, jet-black, beautiful hair.

Six (6) things that JUMPED OUT at me:

1. Why are you waiting to detangle, or barely detangling until the very end of your process?
   • I saw that you said that your hair was way too dry when you started and you didn't want to snap it off.
   • But, your hair starts out dry in your process, it continues to be dry and it stays dry after you wash it.
   • Have you considered doing a WATER BASED pre-shampoo?
     • Mixing water and oil and glycerine and a cheap conditioner.
     • Mixing water and and aloe vera and oil and glycerine.
     • Mixing water and whatever you find works for you via trial and error.
2. Why are you using a clarifying shampoo and clinical strength shampoo?
   • Why are you using a clarifying shampoo? Do you put lots of product in your hair? Clarifying shampoos are DRYING. Should not be used more than every 1 to 2 months.
   • I know you said you have scalp issues. Is the Head and Shoulders Clinical Strength Shampoo okay to be used by itself to cleans your scalp?
3. Why are you cleansing AGAIN with a clay mix? What is your reason for doing a clay treatment?
   • I use clay to wash my hair and it so stripping that I do a mix that @snoop taught.
     • I use WHITE clay and it is one of the most mild clays out there and I NEVER use it by itself or on its own because it is too drying.
     • @snoop taught me to mix it with powdered milk. honey and charcoal powder.
   • You are using BENTONITE clay, STRAIGHT, with nothing mixed into it. Bentonite is harsh and is used to deeply clean and clarify. You've got three clarifying cleansers in place: clarifying shampoo, Head and shoulders and bentonite clay - DRYING
   • Clay is very DRYING
   • I clarify my hair every 3 to 4 months.
     • Regular, non-clarifying shampoo is too harsh for my hair.
     • You are using three (3) on the same wash day.
     • How often do you use these?
     • How often do you wash with them?
4. Where is your protein treatment?
   • Do you have protein in your conditioner?
   • What are you using to fortify the outer structure of your hair?
     • Do you use protein in your routine?
     • If so, what are you using?
     • How often are you using it?
5. What is your moisturizing process?
   • That Dream Product may not have ENOUGH moisture in it once it dries down.
   • Do you re-moisturize 2 to 3 times per week?
   • How often do you put water in your hair, other than when you wash it?
6. What kind of scissors are you using to cut those knots out of your hair?
   • Are you using scissors that you ONLY use on your natural hair?
   • Or do you just use whatever scissors you can find?

My dumb butt asked Chat GPT instead of searching the board. I wanted to wash my hair but didnt want to spend time researching the board.

1. Yeah, I wouldn't mind trying a different pre-poo. Any specific recipes?
2. Chat GPT told me that was Step 1 in the Maximum hydration method. Yes, or I can use the Ketoconazole Shampoo that the derm gave me. I have seborrheic dermatitis.

3. This is the first time I tried this method. I usually never use the clarifying shampoo or the bentonite clay. Typically, I would pre-poo with JBCO, wash with Head and Shoulders Royal Collection Shampoo, and DC with Camille Rose Algae Renew Deep Conditioner or The Doux Honey Moisture Mask. Then I'll use The Doux Moisture Milk as a leave-in and seal with JBCO. See this post.

https://longhaircareforums.com/threads/keep-getting-split-ends-halp.857008/post-25996664

4. I don't have a dedicated one. Suggestions?

5. I'll maybe moisturize during the week with Taliah Waajid The Detangler once or twice during the week and seal with JBCO. I don't want to manipulate my hair too much because if I take my bun down to moisturize, I will have to smooth it back in place. I might wet it with the infinity water bottle spray if I have a really hard time detangling.

6. I use the conair shears that I bought from Walgreens. I only use it on my hair.

What stood out to me is that you had a itchy bump in your head that you scratched then your hair broke off and hasn't grown back since. When I read this I googled because what kind of itchy bump causes a person to lose their hair in this way? Have you been to a dermatologist? If not, in addition to the steps these ladies in the thread have given you, I would suggest making an appointment with one. Maybe even seeking out an appointment with trichologist would be helpful as well.

I don't know what happened. I got my hair done in faux locs once, and then I noticed the bump there. Nah, I didn't go the dermatologist about it. I thought maybe it was my fault because I thought it too much? IDK.

@GraceJones

Oh, so you did a clay after DCing?? I'm interested to hear how your hair turns out.

When I read about the MHM, it was heavy on conditioning and not using anything drying very often. So using too many cleansers seems to go against that.

I agree with Chicoro that I don't see any splits either. And also like she mentioned, that area appears to be growing back in. I believe someone mentioned up thread that the MHM grew back a spot for them too! So it looks like you're on the right track for getting that area back in the game.

Whenever there's a hair issue, to pause and then baby your hair is one of the best ways to fix it. I find that aggressively throwing everything at it, might do you more harm. Also, it'll be hard to know what you did that worked bc too many things were used at the same time. You'll see better progress by putting your hair into a bound PS (like braids/twists under wigs or mini braids/twists) and sticking to a simple regi of daily M&Sing (LOC or LCO), and weekly cleansing and DCing (just two steps) and evaluate every 2-3 months. Using only one cleanser, one condish at a time will help you to know better how they perform on your hair. Putting a plastic cap over your hair at night (GHEing like in the MHM) under your scarf or bonnet will help to increase your moisture levels. I think that's a good start.

I know I probably sound like a broken record but there's a reason why so many naturals live in bound styles like small twists and braids. They are extremely low manipulation and very low maintenance. When trying to do any repair or to rest to your hair, it helps to keep manipulation as low as possible. Your hair is at a great length where it looks really good in small/mini twists. Also, they're very easy to doll up or style in a way that suits you. More importantly, they do a great job of holding in any moisture you impart to your hair - which I believe is the crux of your original problem. One of my early hair crushes (Domin/LHDC2011) started using them in 2003 to grow her hair to HL by getting them redone monthly.

The braids and wig are also another great way to rest your hair while you're trying to impart moisture to it. Same daily and weekly simple regi but it'll give you the added bonus of physically protecting your hair from the elements.

My hair definitely feels softer.

I see splits at the ends of my hair when I look. I see midshaft holes as well. I've been using one shampoo and DC weekly or biweekly since the beginning of my hair journey. I also use a leave-in/moisturizer and seal with JBCO for years since I've been natural. That's always been my staple regimen since I've been on this board. There has to be something that I can change because I'm not seeing my goals. I want to reach MBL. That is about 30 in of hair for me.

I just like my hair to look very neat and "done" day. That usually requires daily manipulation. This is why I typically opt for wigs. I can brush or style the wigs daily, meanwhile leaving my hair in cornrows. I also have access to my scalp, allowing me to apply my prescription oils and my ayurvedicc growth oil. I would mention the new one I bought but I can't remember the name and I don't have the bottle with me.


To give you some idea, I usually don't like to keep my cornrows with extensions in for longer than 2 weeks. I'll keep my box braids for a month.

 

[MzSwift]

@GraceJones

Your simple wig regi should absolutely be enough to get you to MBL with no problem. And you've made the right decision rocking wigs so that you can still play around with daily styling. It sounds like the products may be one issue.

Can I ask, what made you decide on JBCO as the oil for you? It's such a heavy oil, great for heavy sealing! There are so many other oils that are more nourishing to the hair strands as they are small enough to penetrate the hair strands. Also, read up on ceramide oils - the fatty acids in them make the hair more supple. Using those oils along with Ayurveda transformed my hair. My favorites are Safflower and Grapeseed oils. Jojoba is one of the top oils and it's supposed to be the oil that's closest in consistency to our natural sebum so maybe it'll be ok for your scalp?

First, may I suggest that you try to do cornrows WITHOUT any added hair. A lot of ladies with scalp allergies have negative reactions to extension braiding hair. I wonder if you're impeding your progress by having that hair so close to your scalp so often. You have more than enough hair to cornrow - even if you make the cornrows smaller. But even human hair could be causing friction or other damaging effects to your hair strands.

Secondly, I'm not sure who's braiding your hair but maybe they're not handling your hair properly. It's so odd for you to have mid-strand splits when you have such a low-manipulation regi. Maybe the styling tools or processes during take down and re-braiding are not good to your hair. I didn't learn how to cornrow until I was 30 years old and my hair took off once I learned how to do them on my own. They weren't even cute (still aren't) but they got me from 3" to WL in 4 years, alternating with mini braids. I am someone who has never had long hair, even as a child. I'm 4b/a with fine, cottony strands. My hair stayed around 3"-4" for most of my life. Since joining the boards and incorporating the things I'm telling you, I've made WL multiple times. You can do it!

 

[GraceJones]

@GraceJones

Your simple wig regi should absolutely be enough to get you to MBL with no problem. And you've made the right decision rocking wigs so that you can still play around with daily styling. It sounds like the products may be one issue.

Can I ask, what made you decide on JBCO as the oil for you? It's such a heavy oil, great for heavy sealing! There are so many other oils that are more nourishing to the hair strands as they are small enough to penetrate the hair strands. Also, read up on ceramide oils - the fatty acids in them make the hair more supple. Using those oils along with Ayurveda transformed my hair. My favorites are Safflower and Grapeseed oils. Jojoba is one of the top oils and it's supposed to be the oil that's closest in consistency to our natural sebum so maybe it'll be ok for your scalp?

First, may I suggest that you try to do cornrows WITHOUT any added hair. A lot of ladies with scalp allergies have negative reactions to extension braiding hair. I wonder if you're impeding your progress by having that hair so close to your scalp so often. You have more than enough hair to cornrow - even if you make the cornrows smaller. But even human hair could be causing friction or other damaging effects to your hair strands.

Secondly, I'm not sure who's braiding your hair but maybe they're not handling your hair properly. It's so odd for you to have mid-strand splits when you have such a low-manipulation regi. Maybe the styling tools or processes during take down and re-braiding are not good to your hair. I didn't learn how to cornrow until I was 30 years old and my hair took off once I learned how to do them on my own. They weren't even cute (still aren't) but they got me from 3" to WL in 4 years, alternating with mini braids. I am someone who has never had long hair, even as a child. I'm 4b/a with fine, cottony strands. My hair stayed around 3"-4" for most of my life. Since joining the boards and incorporating the things I'm telling you, I've made WL multiple times. You can do it!

I like JBCO because I feel like it makes my hair super soft, not matter what leave-in I use.

Do you have an specific cermide oils that you recommend? I tried jojoba oil before and I wasn't crazy about it. I also had a huge bottle of grapeseed oil. I didn't like it for sealing, but I used as a pre-poo just to finish the bottle. JBCO did a better job for me.

No, I never do the cornrows under my wigs with extensions. I always use my own natural hair. Sometimes I will get faux locs, box braids or cornrows with extension hair just to switch up my style. I want to use synthetic hair though, my dermatologist recommends only human braiding hair. Even so, I haven't had my hair braided in about a year. I wanted to give my temples a break.

Yes, the braiders are rough and they often want you to come blow dried. Someone even asked me to come with my hair pressed next time. I was not about to do that! I want to learn to cornrow because then I would be able to lessen damage by braiding my hair myself. My hair also grows very very slowly. I get about 3 inches or so a year.

I don't take down my hair unless I have the time/energy to deal with it patiently. I usually do it very slowly with some type of leave-in or braid spray. Then I will pre-poo, wash and DC with the method I mentioned previously. If I have to blow dry I will use a heat protectant.

P.S. What Ayurveda method do you use? Thanks for all the help

 

[Lute]

@MzSwift @Chicoro @Lute

Any ideas on the broken patch? I feel like it’s been like that for about a year and a half and hasn’t really been growing in.

Sorry for the late response. The ladies here gave you a lot of great advice and many good suggestions.
In regards of that patch does that area still feel sensitive or itchy?

Your hair braiding story reminds me why, I had to take matters into my own hands when it comes to hair braiding. It's very hard to find a braider that respects our hair type.

My recommendations on protein treatments, which I even use. I use it at least once every month to two months.
1. Shea Moisture Strengthen & Restore Treatment Masque
2. Keratin 2 Minute Reconstructor

But going through your regime: I would agree with the ladies. I think your doing way too much. For now keep your regime very very simple. Using Clay Washes or Even Ayurveda - maybe too much for now.

• Detangler: African Pride Moisture Miracle Aloe & Coconut Water Pre-Shampoo Detangler & Pre-conditioner
  Note: This is what I use now. Before I would use my favorite moisture conditioner mixed with water to detangle.
• Shampoo (Moisturizing, Clarifying, Medical (if needed)) - I like to use Nizoral instead of Head and Shoulder
• Conditioner - I usually use moisturizing conditioner
• Deep Conditioner (One For Moisture, One for Protein - I alternate depending the time period)
• Leave ins/Oils/Butters
  • In regard of oils & butters - I like to use Almond or Avocado Oil and Shea Butter (especially on my ends)
    1/11/2025- I also use Shea butter towards my ends and then wear a plastic bag/plastic cap to help melt the butter.

 

[GraceJones]

Sorry for the late response. The ladies here gave you a lot of great advice and many good suggestions.
In regards of that patch does that area still feel sensitive or itchy?

Your hairbraiding story reminds me why, I had to take matters into my own hands when it comes to hair braiding. It's very hard to find a braider that respects our hair type.

My recommendations on protein treatments, which I even use. I use it at least once every month to two months.
1. Shea Moisture Strengthen & Restore Treatment Masque
2. Keratin 2 Minute Reconstructor

But going through your regime: I would agree with the ladies. I think your doing way too much. For now keep your regime very very simple. Using Clay Washes or Even Ayurveda - maybe too much for now.

• Detangler: African Pride Moisture Miracle Aloe & Coconut Water Pre-Shampoo Detangler & Pre-conditioner
  Note: This is what I use now. Before I would use my favorite moisture conditioner mixed with water to detangle.
• Shampoo (Moisturizing, Clarifying, Medical (if needed)) - I like to use Nizoral instead of Head and Shoulder
• Conditioner - I usually use moisturizing conditioner
• Deep Conditioner (One For Moisture, One for Protein - I alternate depending the time period)
• Leave ins/Oils/Butters
  • In regard of oils & butters - I like to use Almond or Avocado Oil and Shea Butter (especially on my ends)

Wow so you condition AND deep condition. I’ve never that before

Is your hair breaking in the back nape area or did you cut or shave that hair there in the lady 12 to 15 months?

Just saw this. I didn’t shave or cut it. It just won’t retain any length. I don’t know if I touch it too much. Sometimes it itches a little bit, but I have itches all over my scalp

 

[Lute]

Wow so you condition AND deep condition. I’ve never that before

Just saw this. I didn’t shave or cut it. It just won’t retain any length. I don’t know if I touch it too much. Sometimes it itches a little bit, but I have itches all over my scalp

Yep, I try do it every time I wash my hair which is every 2 weeks. There are times when I do skip it if I'm too tired. But I try to be consistent.

When you do deep conditioning. Always do it for the time that says on the package with heat (if you can). Never go past it. It's diminishing returns, waste of time and can harm your scalp. Leading to Seborrheic dermatitis and such.

Itchy scalp? - I have a few questions on that
1. Has the JBCO ever touched your scalp. Sometimes, JBCO can be but if an irritant on the scalp.
2. Hopefully after you simplify your regimen. The itchiness will calm down. Have you spoken to your derm about that itchy spot?

 

[GraceJones]

Yep, I try do it every time I wash my hair which is every 2 weeks. There are times when I do skip it if I'm too tired. But I try to be consistent.

When you do deep conditioning. Always do it for the time that says on the package with heat (if you can). Never go past it. It's diminishing returns, waste of time and can harm your scalp. Leading to Seborrheic dermatitis and such.

Itchy scalp? - I have a few questions on that
1. Has the JBCO ever touched your scalp. Sometimes, JBCO can be but if an irritant on the scalp.
2. Hopefully after you simplify your regimen. The itchiness will calm down. Have you spoken to your derm about that itchy spot?

No. I don’t use JBCO on my scalp. At times when growth is haopening, people experience an itchy scalp. It only itches really badly if I wait too long to wash (3-4weeks).

2. No. It wasn’t until I saw the picture that I saw it was that bad. I’m going to the dermatologist on Monday

 

[Chicoro]

@GraceJones


Here is a trimming video for you. I do not trim like this but looks do-able!

 

[GGsKin]

@GraceJones

Oh, so you did a clay after DCing?? I'm interested to hear how your hair turns out.

When I read about the MHM, it was heavy on conditioning and not using anything drying very often. So using too many cleansers seems to go against that.

I agree with Chicoro that I don't see any splits either. And also like she mentioned, that area appears to be growing back in. I believe someone mentioned up thread that the MHM grew back a spot for them too! So it looks like you're on the right track for getting that area back in the game.

Whenever there's a hair issue, to pause and then baby your hair is one of the best ways to fix it. I find that aggressively throwing everything at it, might do you more harm. Also, it'll be hard to know what you did that worked bc too many things were used at the same time. You'll see better progress by putting your hair into a bound PS (like braids/twists under wigs or mini braids/twists) and sticking to a simple regi of daily M&Sing (LOC or LCO), and weekly cleansing and DCing (just two steps) and evaluate every 2-3 months. Using only one cleanser, one condish at a time will help you to know better how they perform on your hair. Putting a plastic cap over your hair at night (GHEing like in the MHM) under your scarf or bonnet will help to increase your moisture levels. I think that's a good start.

I know I probably sound like a broken record but there's a reason why so many naturals live in bound styles like small twists and braids. They are extremely low manipulation and very low maintenance. When trying to do any repair or to rest to your hair, it helps to keep manipulation as low as possible.

I just had to correct you @MzSwift, it was me who made the comment about GHE helping to frown in my smooth bald spot (not MHM), I just also happened to be doing the Maximum Hydration Method at the time. I can’t recall the poster’s name (on BHM)- she created this method, but initially started doing the intense GHE to grow in a bald spot. I decided to take the risk and experiment, and it worked for me too.

The thing is, following a strict MHM routine as I was, damaged my hair in the long run. I did learn to read ingredients lists, and had a long long time of experimenting how different shampoos, conditioners and gels affected my natural hair based on the ingredients/ results.

@GraceJones you should take note of the ingredients in your products and what they are designed to do, before just jumping in. Doing MHM as I was doing, damaged my hair in the long run, and I wouldn’t want you to do more damage than repair. Good hair care takes time and research, and a gentle touch.

ETA: this posted weird and I can’t resolve it. I hope the message isn’t lost- it was the intense that GHE helped my smooth bald spot finally start growing again.

 

[snoop]

Yes! I've actually stopped posting on this side because when I would ask questions folks would barely respond...
I'm glad that's changed!

Maybe the boar bristles are too stiff. I got it from the BSS. Do you have recommendations for goat hair brushes?

Yes, I have midshaft holes in my hair as well. I do weight training, do I do track my calories in terms of protein, fats, and carbs. I also take iron vitamins for my anemia. My doctor says my levels are much better.

I've had this scarf since I was about 10 years old, but I'm pretty sure I got it from the BSS. Do you have any recommendations for a scarf/pillowcase? I typically don't wear bonnets

It just occurred to me that I didn't reply... sorry

I've been buying my scarves and pillowcases from Dharma Trading Company. They have different kinds of silk scarves. Everything is plain because they're a wholesaler and people can buy and die their own products. I just use them as is. The pillowcases aren't that thick and start to get holes after a year or two, but I'm ok to use them to complete threads. I took a look on Amaz.on and I can never be sure based on the description if I'm actually getting silk or silk-like satin. I want the real thing.

 

[GraceJones]

@Chicoro
@Lute
@MzSwift

So now I’ve been washing my hair in the shower weekly using the Head and Shoulders Royal Collections. Then I will condition with Mielle Organics Pomegranate & Honey Detangling Conditioner as I’m washing my body. After I rinse, I will detangle with the EZ brush I posted earlier.

Then I DC with The Doux Sweetest Thing Honey Moisture Mask for about half an hour under the hooded dryer. As a final step, I will twist with Garnier Fructis Air Dry Curl Cream. My hair does feel much softer.

I’m thinking about getting goddess braid, but I’m afraid that if I go with my hair not blow dried, the braider will complain. I don’t really want to blow dry because I don’t want the damage. I use heat protectant but still…

I was going to do them myself but it would probably take days and I don’t have time for that.

I guess I could cornrow my hair and wear one of my older wigs, but they doesn’t look that great. They’re a few years old now. I could get another wig made, but I should really spend my money on other things.


As of now, I’m just wearing my twists under a satin scarf and a hat.

 

[Chicoro]

@Chicoro
@Lute
@MzSwift

So now I’ve been washing my hair in the shower weekly using the Head and Shoulders Royal Collections. Then I will condition with Mielle Organics Pomegranate & Honey Detangling Conditioner as I’m washing my body. After I rinse, I will detangle with the EZ brush I posted earlier.

Then I DC with The Doux Sweetest Thing Honey Moisture Mask for about half an hour under the hooded dryer. As a final step, I will twist with Garnier Fructis Air Dry Curl Cream. My hair does feel much softer.

I’m thinking about getting goddess braid, but I’m afraid that if I go with my hair not blow dried, the braider will complain. I don’t really want to blow dry because I don’t want the damage. I use heat protectant but still…

I was going to do them myself but it would probably take days and I don’t have time for that.

I guess I could cornrow my hair and wear one of my older wigs, but they doesn’t look that great. They’re a few years old now. I could get another wig made, but I should really spend my money on other things.


As of now, I’m just wearing my twists under a satin scarf and a hat.

Stick with the twists under scarf and hat for now. You are still not out the woods as it relates to your hair. Until your hair starts turning around for the better, you are still in trial and error mode. Wigs, braids don’t matter. Try to figure out what your hair needs.

Observe, analyze, document, photograph, make a small tweak or change. Repeat.

 

[GraceJones]

Stick with the twists under scarf and hat for now. You are still not out the woods as it relates to your hair. Until your hair starts turning around for the better, you are still in trial and error mode. Wigs, braids don’t matter. Try to figure out what your hair needs.

Observe, analyze, document, photograph, make a small tweak or change. Repeat.

How do I know when I’m out of the woods and my hair has recovered?

I can’t stay in the hat 24/7. What should I do when I have to go to special events?

 

[Chicoro]

How do I know when I’m out of the woods and my hair has recovered?

I can’t stay in the hat 24/7. What should I do when I have to go to special events?

When your splits reduce in quantity. When your hair starts feeling better to your touch. When your hair looks better to you. That’s how you know you are getting out the woods.

You come home and you sleep. That’s not 24 hours. You have days off from work that’s not 7 days.

Special events are just that: they are special. They don’t happen every day and they certainly aren’t 24/7 either!

So, for those special days you do your hair in a style that makes you feel gorgeous. The style doesn’t have to be protective or low manipulation. For example, I blow my hair straight for special occasions. It’s not the best for the health of my hair, but on those occasions where I want to feel sexy and beautiful, I do it.

In my opinion, you are already on the right track. First, you recognized you had a problem and then you asked for help. Next, you started to implement changes.

Hair doesn’t change over night. What has to change first is YOU, your actions, the way you think and feel about your hair and yourself. The hard part is to start and get in motion. And you are already in motion!