I Am Mad as Hell!!!!

[Honey6928215]

My daughter is still going, she flies out in the morning.

NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

I know that makes you hate him even more. So ole punk just left his daughter hanging by herself? Why do I get the feeling that she will never forgive her father when the brother decides to come after her?

 

[cocosweet]

I just talked to my daughter, and her father is not going. He claims that the counselors don't want him to be there. He is such a jerk!!!!

What?!!!!!

Is there any way you can convince your daughter not to go?

 

[akeli]

What?!!!!!

Is there any way you can convince your daughter not to go?

I tried, but she feels like she has to go. She talked to one of the bootcamp wannabes and they said it would be best for her to take him. They don't even know the family dynamics (except the lies her father told them) so how can they know whats best. Her father is really playing mindgames with her.

 

[Honey6928215]

Akeli,

I know I'm coming across as harsh but if I were you I would make my daughter cancel her flight. Forget about what her father will say. Who cares what he will think?!! Hell, he's not thinking of her safety. She don't know what her half-brother is capable of doing considering that he's a drug dealer and has a gun!!!!

I'm afraid for her already. She don't know what will kick off. How do you know if they will actually catch him? He just might get away and try to threaten her. You understand where I'm going with this? I say cancel the trip. If her father raises hell then that's him! At least you know your daughter won't get hurt.

 

[MochaSilk]

Akeli,

I know I'm coming across as harsh but if I were you I would make my daughter cancel her flight. Forget about what her father will say. Who cares what he will think?!! Hell, he's not thinking of her safety. She don't know what her half-brother is capable of doing considering that he's a drug dealer and has a gun!!!!

I'm afraid for her already. She don't know what will kick off. How do you know if they will actually catch him? He just might get away and try to threaten her. You understand where I'm going with this? I say cancel the trip. If her father raises hell then that's him! At least you know your daughter won't get hurt.

ITA.

I'm praying for you & your daughter.

 

[akeli]

Thanks, I will be on pins and needles all day tomorrow. If anything happens to my daughter, I will be writing you guys from the cellblock wearing an orange jumper.

Seriously, I am going to put my faith in God and pray that everything goes well.

 

[akeli]

I had just read that "Dad" was going and NOW he's NOT?! Oh brother!

Well I say your daughter is a FINE YOUNG WOMAN and you should be PROUD of her. You are raising her to be a courageous and brave woman.

If she does go, let us pray that she is steeled and that things go off without a hitch. WOW. Unbelievable.

My heart goes out to you, your daughter and her brother.

Thanks, she is a very caring and compassionate person and I wouldn't trade her for the world. Her father is taking advantage of her good characteristics.

 

[Honey6928215]

Thanks, she is a very caring and compassionate person and I wouldn't trade her for the world. Her father is taking advantage of her good characteristics.

I'm curious to know. How close are her and her half-brother? Do they communicate with each other at all?

 

[akeli]

I'm curious to know. How close are her and her half-brother? Do they communicate with each other at all?

They are not that close, she only sees him when she is home from school and that's Thanksgiving, Xmas and a few times during the summer. The only time she calls/he calls while she is away is when her dad wants her to have a heart to heart with him.

 

[junipertree]

I will try to keep this as brief as possible, but I have a 21-year old daughter who has a 16-year old half-brother. The boys mother is remarried and not very involved in her sons life. Anyway, her brother has been in a lot of trouble lately, his dad caught him selling drugs, and just recently found a gun in his room.

Well, his father signed him up for one of those bootcamps where they are supposed to straighten out kids. Well, here's the kicker, he expects my daughter (who isn't super close to her brother) to trick him into flying to Las Vegas so the boot camp people can forcibly pick him up from the airport once they arrive. He will not be there. I talked to my daughter and she is highly stressed about this, she feels she has to do it because her father told her that if she doesn't help, her brother will end up in prison. I tried to talk rationally about this to him and he hung up on me.

I am sooooo angry.

Let me preface this by saying I am so sorry that you are going through this. I don't agree that your ex should be manipulating your daughter into doing something that she is uncomfortable doing.

HOWEVER - I guess I am in the minority on this one, and maybe I haven't completely considered all of the ramifications but my first reaction is - why shouldn't she help intervene? It is her younger brother and that is what older siblings are for. I don't fully understand the reasoning behind why the father can't be there and why the counselors are saying he shouldn't but if it were my younger brother I would feel obligated to intervene. I mean, he's only 16 years old and seems to be headed to prison. I (personally) feel like I would rather him hate me now for trying than to hate me later for not trying. He won't understand now that what is being done is for his best interest but hopefully he will appreciate it later. Also, the fact that the brother's mother is not involved has little bearing and, if anything, seems to bolster the argument that this young boy needs SOMEONE to care/intervene. Are you concerned that he might hurt her (your daughter)? If so, I see your point. I just think that we seem to be so scared of our youth that we are paralyzed by fear and don't intervene or intervene too late and that is one of the reasons why so many at risk youth end up behind bars. I also understand that my opinion is biased in that my child is not involved - I do understand your concern as a mother.

I hope it works out for everyone involved and I hope that your daughter stays safe.

 

[lexi08]

My daughter is still going, she flies out in the morning.

What if her brother gets angry and decides to come after her later.... I have seen this happen.... when some men/boys are put in a situation like this they don't want to be in they can become violent.... I know this from experience. I really hope your daughter is ok and there is no drama

 

[akeli]

Let me preface this by saying I am so sorry that you are going through this. I don't agree that your ex should be manipulating your daughter into doing something that she is uncomfortable doing.

HOWEVER - I guess I am in the minority on this one, and maybe I haven't completely considered all of the ramifications but my first reaction is - why shouldn't she help intervene? It is her younger brother and that is what older siblings are for. I don't fully understand the reasoning behind why the father can't be there and why the counselors are saying he shouldn't but if it were my younger brother I would feel obligated to intervene. I mean, he's only 16 years old and seems to be headed to prison. I (personally) feel like I would rather him hate me now for trying than to hate me later for not trying. He won't understand now that what is being done is for his best interest but hopefully he will appreciate it later. Also, the fact that the brother's mother is not involved has little bearing and, if anything, seems to bolster the argument that this young boy needs SOMEONE to care/intervene. Are you concerned that he might hurt her (your daughter)? If so, I see your point. I just think that we seem to be so scared of our youth that we are paralyzed by fear and don't intervene or intervene too late and that is one of the reasons why so many at risk youth end up behind bars. I also understand that my opinion is biased in that my child is not involved - I do understand your concern as a mother.

I hope it works out for everyone involved and I hope that your daughter stays safe.

I didn't mind when he would ask her to talk to her brother. But, I feel like she is too young to have such a heavy burden placed on her shoulders. I believe that his mother and father created this mess and they should clean it up, instead of putting it on my daughter.

My biggest fear is that her brother may harm or even kill himself while at this bootcamp. Then, my daughter would have to carry this life-long burden on her shoulders which has the potential to affect her negatively.

Otherwise, I am all for her helping her brother. My daughter is my only child, and this is her only sibling, so I would love for him to resolve his issues. That way they can rely on each other when we parents are no longer around.

 

[akeli]

Well, my daughter dropped her half-brother off at the airport. She didn't elaborate...but she did say it was a horrible experience. Of course, her brother felt betrayed and now hates her. She hasn't called her dad to tell him how things went because she is mad about how the whole situation unfolded.

 

[cocosweet]

Damn. I'm sorry, akeli.

 

[lexi08]

Well, my daughter dropped her half-brother off at the airport. She didn't elaborate...but she did say it was a horrible experience. Of course, her brother felt betrayed and now hates her. She hasn't called her dad to tell him how things went because she is mad about how the whole situation unfolded.

I am really sorry she went through this. Shame on her father

 

[MochaSilk]

Well, my daughter dropped her half-brother off at the airport. She didn't elaborate...but she did say it was a horrible experience. Of course, her brother felt betrayed and now hates her. She hasn't called her dad to tell him how things went because she is mad about how the whole situation unfolded.

Oh, no... I hope he can overcome his anger at his sister. Those two need each other. For all the drama getting her brother to boot camp, I hope it's worth it and does some good. erplexed

That was so cowardly what their father did to them.