erplexedthe bolded seems like a compliment. I've never heard anyone say, "man, i want some hard hair...something with a straw-like texture.
I don't think that if someone doesn't consider the statement "Your hair is long" to be a compliment suggests that they don't know how to take one, or that their compliments are not sincere. I am not quite sure where that came from.
Personally, if I am giving a compliment, I make sure that the person receiving it knows that it's a compliment. I don't think it's that hard to do.
Someone can easily compliment something that is obvious by following the statement up with "I like it" or "it's so pretty" or "it's cute." It's not that anyone is saying the comment "your hair is long" can't be a compliment. By itself, however, since most people don't necessarily prefer or like long hair, it would need an additional statement to make it a compliment.
Plain and simple... I just don't agree.
What other reason would someone have just to say that? I'm sure they just weren't talking to themselves.
Compliment giving is not something that is supposed to be so complicated imo
I just keep thinking... what do you want people to do? Carefully think about what they want to say for 30 minutes, making sure to point out every single thing they like about your hair? Not only that it's long, but it's soft, shiny, smells great, has so much body?
Where do you draw the line? Why can't people just give short, simple compliments sometimes?
I know we are hair obsessed... but going back to my first posting, if someone told you you have a nice figure, you don't require them to point out that you have nice perky boobs and round, wide hips before you take it as a compliment, do you?
If we are so obsessed that we can't take a simple compliment for what it's worth, that's a shame imo.
Like I said, not intended to offend. I want to know where people are coming from and I am sometimes a little tiny weeny bit blunt. I hope it didn't come across as me being angry/mean.
Plain and simple... I just don't agree.
What other reason would someone have just to say that? I'm sure they just weren't talking to themselves.
Compliment giving is not something that is supposed to be so complicated imo
I just keep thinking... what do you want people to do? Carefully think about what they want to say for 30 minutes, making sure to point out every single thing they like about your hair? Not only that it's long, but it's soft, shiny, smells great, has so much body?
Where do you draw the line? Why can't people just give short, simple compliments sometimes?
I know we are hair obsessed... but going back to my first posting, if someone told you you have a nice figure, you don't require them to point out that you have nice perky boobs and round, wide hips before you take it as a compliment, do you?
If we are so obsessed that we can't take a simple compliment for what it's worth, that's a shame imo.
Like I said, not intended to offend. I want to know where people are coming from and I am sometimes a little tiny weeny bit blunt. I hope it didn't come across as me being angry/mean.
I think that's a nice short, simple compliment, don't you?I say, "Really? Good, I've been trying to grow it out for about 2 years now."
I would hope that it wouldn't take someone 30 minutes to think of the comment "your hair is long and pretty."
In your example "you have a nice figure" NICE is the word that helps to make the comment a compliment. While we can go back and forth on whether "you have a figure" is a compliment or not, my point is that you can simply compliment the length of someone's hair, but saying "you have long hair" is not a compliment.
I agree that compliment giving shouldn't be complicated, and I don't think it has to be, but I don't believe that everything that folks say is acompliment just because some people in society consider it to be.
That's some ish right there.
I would hope that it wouldn't take someone 30 minutes to think of the comment "your hair is long and pretty."
In your example "you have a nice figure" NICE is the word that helps to make the comment a compliment. While we can go back and forth on whether "you have a figure" is a compliment or not, my point is that you can simply compliment the length of someone's hair, but saying "you have long hair" is not a compliment.
I agree that compliment giving shouldn't be complicated, and I don't think it has to be, but I don't believe that everything that folks say is a compliment just because some people in society consider it to be.
apparently it does for some 
. I guess adding 2 more words makes the sentence so effortful and time consuming. i don't get all of the uproar. At least this thread is keeping me entertained during my study breaks.
but if you know that the person MEANS it as a compliment, why not just take it as one?
Why mince words?
I just think it's funny that some people act as if you have to "use the right words" in order to give a "proper" compliment.
Since when do we have to be prim and proper and use the Queen's English to give a compliment, lol?
If you are an English professor grading a paper, I would understand you correcting someone for not saying it "properly". Technically it does not express the thought fully.
but do you really have to speak perfect/proper English to give a compliment? Is this second grade where we learn that all sentences must have a subject, verb and express a complete thought?
If the compliment is a sentence fragment, it is not valid
If someone said, "Those shoes are hot!" is that not a compliment because they used slang and not proper English?
You see the quote in bold makes sense to me
.
But why does leaving those 2 words out make the whole thing null and void?
I find this to be funny too
). No sooner that I finished the you on thank you she said black women can't grow long hair and that is why we wear weaves
. I reminded her in a nice way that ALL women can grow their hair long and weaves were first adorned by white women
. Now I assumed that her "your hair is long" comment was a compliment but how do you take it after that negative opinionated comment. I would have walked away thinking that was a compliment and it wasn't. From now on I will answer people with " OK (weird expression) thank you (weird expression) and a smile.
I'm glad you're laughing. I was a little worried for you there.
it's not null and void, it's just not a compliment. The recipient may take it as one, but I wouldn't. It's a simple, subjective statement. I would just smile, which acknowledges their statement, and keep it moving. I equate it to the times when i say to a tall dude, "you're so tall." it doesn't mean that I like tall guys, that i don't like tall guys, that he's cute 'cause he's tall, etc....it just means that i fine his height to be above what i deem as average. nothing more, nothing less.
i know that hair is a symbol of beauty by many (as is height in a man) but it's not true for all. Most people who i know (myself included) would prefer shorter thick hair than longer thin hair. also don't think that long hair suits everyone. I'll be interested to see how i'll look with mbl hair when i get there. i honestly feel that i'll need to cut it in a layered BSL and keep it there. I guess the big thing is that i don't inherently find long hair attractive, thus, stating that someone's hair is long isn't necessarily a compliment. for those who love long hair just because, ii'm sure that it is a compliment.
we can agree to disagree
again, good study break. one more hour to go
Here is a thought-
A white women came up to me in the store the other day and said " my, your hair is long". Now I took that as a compliment and said thank you ( of course with a weird expression on my face
