He has it all except....

B

blaqbarb

New Member
Have you ever meet someone that is a great person in every way, but sucks in the bedroom?? :nono: I mean they're the perfect person to be with, but they're just missing that one thing. Did you continue a relationship with them anyway and try to work on it or did you just let them go?
 
If dudes a keeper in all other aspects, then you need to jump on that and work that wackness outta his system.

Unless he's a premie or has some kind of medical disorder, you can turn lemons into lemonade. But the effort is only worth it if he ain't coming up short in other areas. Feel me. :wink2:
 
JCoily said:
If dudes a keeper in all other aspects, then you need to jump on that and work that wackness outta his system.

Unless he's a premie or has some kind of medical disorder, you can turn lemons into lemonade. But the effort is only worth it if he ain't coming up short in other areas. Feel me. :wink2:
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On those same lines... Before you kick dude to the curb, have you communicated to him what you like/need in the bedroom? If he's willing to keep working at it till he gets it right, then keep him. Otherwise, you already know...
 
Sex is very important. It could make or break a relationship.

Find someone that you are compatible with sexually. If not, you'll have diamonds but they won't shine.
 
I mean sexually is the person remedial or just out of practice? Some things you can learn or be taught. We all start out uncoordinated in the bed...there are books, DVDs (not porn), and other things you can try...
 
I've hung in there on "more than one" occasion.

Possible outcomes:
1. You get frustrated and act out in other ways.
2. You adjust "your" expectations to "appreciate" his abilities (like when you go from an 8"er to a 5.5"er.
3. You be come creative and add #2 to the mix.
4. You take charge, instruct and #3.

Your action/reaction will greatly depend on the amount of "care" you have for him. If it's love (in moste cases) you'll adjust. If it's just lust then by all means get to steppin.

Just do what you can to ensure that what ever you're sharing is mutually satisfying, and that there's receprocity in you relationship.
 
Ms. Celie...you has my sympathies. :ohwell:

Seriously, I agree with most of the other posters. Don't give up just yet. If he's a great man and this is the ONLY (or biggest) problem, you'd be a fool to give up without a fight (fight= creativity, communication, practice, research).

Just think of the opposite: Horrible man, great sex. No thanks! :nono: Not saying you have to have it one way or the other, just letting you know you have options.

Good Luck!
 
Depends on what's important to you and what you want out of the relationship? Just bedbuddies - it ain't gonna work. More of a relationship type thing - don't make it a priority but something you can work on and look forward to, maybe. Consider what ya'll do with your clothes on :lachen:
 
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JCoily said:
^ If he's the side then tell his *** bye.

I thought this was some dude you were trying to build something with.
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Basically, if he's the side his sole purpose should be sex. If he can't deliver in that department what's the point? Let him go and find you a side piece that can lay the pipe.
 
yorlooksmybiz said:
I've hung in there on "more than one" occasion.

Possible outcomes:
1. You get frustrated and act out in other ways.
2. You adjust "your" expectations to "appreciate" his abilities (like when you go from an 8"er to a 5.5"er.
3. You be come creative and add #2 to the mix.
4. You take charge, instruct and #3.

Your action/reaction will greatly depend on the amount of "care" you have for him. If it's love (in moste cases) you'll adjust. If it's just lust then by all means get to steppin.

Just do what you can to ensure that what ever you're sharing is mutually satisfying, and that there's receprocity in you relationship.
Click to expand...

OMG that is so true. OP you are not alone. What to do what to do.
 
MzTami said:
Sex is very important. It could make or break a relationship.

Find someone that you are compatible with sexually. If not, you'll have diamonds but they won't shine.
Click to expand...


ITA..... As one of my friend said big or small a issue is a issue.
 
:nono:
sylver2 said:
met the perfect, fine dude. he was about 3 inches erect:sad:
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:nono::nono: That's sad. That's something that I can even work out. I'm willing to teach you, work with you if the tools are already there, but 3 inches is unacceptable. I hope he finds someone that can overlook that, even though I don't think many can.
 
Why do so many people have this idea that one's lovemaking ability is somehow inborn or "natural"? It's NOT. Great lovers are MADE, they are NOT born. Additionally, sex is one of those clear instances where it's "different strokes for different folks." You may not like some of the things he does, but it may have driven a past girlfriend wild.

Because each person, individually, has a set of things that will get them off, communication is extremely important when it comes to sex. Your partner can't please you if he doesn't know what you want. Communicate it to him tactfully (i.e. rather than telling him what you don't like, phrase it in terms of what you do like).

And besides, a lot of times the "teaching" part and exploring what your partner likes can be a hell of a lot of fun!

If you want more from this guy, then help him out a bit. Otherwise, if he's just an f-buddy, move along.
 
wow :ohwell: Imma say something that will make some folks mad but....

if he ain't got at least 5 I will not even consider.

I've seen 3 inches of meat and all I did was :lachen: And I really couldn't help it. It was the size of my damn pinky!

I had a "period" because it wasn't not happening and I can't fake an O.

OP, Since you working with a side piece thats not doing it for you, um.. well.. I agree with JCoily and think you should leave him alone.

But if you just wanna give it the ol' college try, then you need to tell him what you like and what you want and how you want it done.

Give him a few weeks to see if he can get it right and if its just STILL not working, then he's probably not going to work out for you.

-A
 
Cichelle said:
Is your main squeeze bad at all the things the side is good at?
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You got it! You know how people always say if I could take this trait from this person and that trait from that person, then it would equal the perfect person? That's what this is.
 
bermudabeauty said:
OMG that is so true. OP you are not alone. What to do what to do.
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That's what I'm trying to figure out. They're both really great people, but the main one has his issues and so does the side. Who doesn't have issues though. Let me know if you figure something out.
 
Arcadian said:
wow :ohwell: Imma say something that will make some folks mad but....

if he ain't got at least 5 I will not even consider.

I've seen 3 inches of meat and all I did was :lachen: And I really couldn't help it. It was the size of my damn pinky!

I had a "period" because it wasn't not happening and I can't fake an O.

OP, Since you working with a side piece thats not doing it for you, um.. well.. I agree with JCoily and think you should leave him alone.

But if you just wanna give it the ol' college try, then you need to tell him what you like and what you want and how you want it done.

Give him a few weeks to see if he can get it right and if its just STILL not working, then he's probably not going to work out for you.

-A
Click to expand...

He's the side for other reasons besides sex. The main person has that more than covered. :look:
 
blaqbarb said:
He's the side for other reasons besides sex. The main person has that more than covered. :look:
Click to expand...

Ok so NOW Im really interested. Girl, why and how long? And do they know?

Believe me, no judgements coming from here! i'm like dayum!:lachen: (everybody can't roll that way) at the same time, I do not envy your situation. Thats an ugly one to be in.

If Mr Man #1 is good with sex but Mr Man #2 is good at the other stuff....

wow...

Bad sex for some is better than no sex but me personally would just rather have none than bad. I guess buy a vibrator and stick with number 2???


-A
 
Wow..Your situation is complicated. Which one do you "SEE" yourself w/ LONG TERM. That may help in your decision making process..
 
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