Has anyone out the had success with Celibate Dating?

its very hard and like an old movie or song that you put on repeat, you know exactly where the breaks are, you know the add libs, you start to see the technical flaws someone in editing left out.

Dating is a rhetorical thing, many men will feel you are trying to run some type of game on them and it dissapates, you get tired of men trying to comprimise your self worth and you dissapate, you get tired of not feeling like what your doing is the right thing. and you stop dating for a while, then it all starts all over again.

My coworker ask me and really are perplexed that I do not have a man, and am not married espeacially the male ones, i dont really put myself in the midst of females but they dont understand either, but i have gave all im gonna give. My vajayjay is off the market. Until a suitable buyer comes along.
 
It's hard out there!!! When the guys find out, they split usually after date #3 or #4. However, I figure they would have eventually split or messed over me anyway if we did the do. Since I'm not having sex, I don't have anything to lose. Apparently my personality and character are not enough to make them stick around anyway...so I'm glad I didn't give up the goodies. I can deal with disappointments, but not the heartbreaks!!!
 
i had great success in 2004.....i met a guy and we waited to have sex for 18mnths....I was already 6months into my 1yr wait which turned into two...he ended up buyin a house in NC so we didnt stay together but that was the best relationship that i had in my life!!!!

Initially i didnt tell him what my plan was but eventually we talked about it and he tried me many times but i stuck to my guns and he still stuck around and treated me no different
 
Reslnt1 said:
i had great success in 2004.....i met a guy and we waited to have sex for 18mnths....I was already 6months into my 1yr wait which turned into two...he ended up buyin a house in NC so we didnt stay together but that was the best relationship that i had in my life!!!!

Initially i didnt tell him what my plan was but eventually we talked about it and he tried me many times but i stuck to my guns and he still stuck around and treated me no different
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I'm going to have to defer to Res on this one. I have gotten more good experiences out of not having sex in a relationship. Now I must say that the only times I did not good responses were:

1. When I made known that I wasn't having sex at all ever.
2. When I created situations that provided a stage for sex and didn't carry it out. (making out, staying out late, etc.)
3. When I was sexually suggestive and didn't go any further.

Now you may think #1 is lying but it is not. #1 you should not be talking about sex for any reason if you are not in a committed relationship who cares if he brings it up. Steer the convo away and if he steers it back leave. Believe me when I left they always tracked me down and let me know that they were just testing me. Please....

Also, if you do #2 and #3 it is selfish because you are getting your needs of affection met without meeting someone else's needs for affection. All the better to steer clear of the situation then to lead someone on.

I know guys say and do alot of things that you lead to think and act otherwise (same with us) but no guy wants a glimpse into your sexual past and the ones that do are already in a committed relationship with you anyway (don't read this as want to be). I can want to have a chocolate donut, get a taste, and decide I don't want it anymore and walk out without buying it. Be forewarned.
 
I finally found one!!! :creatures

He's willing to wait until I'm ready (which will most likely be after I'm married). He's not a virgin but I am partly b/c of years of childhood molestation.
 
I've done it successfully, with some FIONE @ss men, I might add. I only had one ask me flat out for sex. The rest were celibate also, so we had no problems.
 
The worst kind are the men who pretend like they are okay with celibacy and then keep trying to get you to "change your mind" because they think you must be cellibate because:
1. You don't know how good sex is
2. You are waiting for the right man (this is for those who are waiting for marriage) and he is the right one (or so he thinks :rolleyes:)

I don't understand why men like that hang around. Do they commit to something and find it is more than they bargained for or do they love the challenge of trying to get you to bed?
 
vivmaiko said:
The worst kind are the men who pretend like they are okay with celibacy and then keep trying to get you to "change your mind" because they think you must be cellibate because:
1. You don't know how good sex is
2. You are waiting for the right man (this is for those who are waiting for marriage) and he is the right one (or so he thinks :rolleyes:)

I don't understand why men like that hang around. Do they commit to something and find it is more than they bargained for or do they love the challenge of trying to get you to bed?
Click to expand...

I think even worse is men who act like they are ok with it and will wait, but are getting their needs met elsewhere. That isnt fair either. I remember having a so called friend I had some classes with a few years ago. He was supposed to be with a girl who was saving herself for marriage and he planned to marry her...eventually. Well meanwhile, he was trying to have sex with anybody he could (including me--didnt happen). I thought that was so foul that I didnt talk to him anymore after he tried me like that.

Janiebaby,
I like what you were saying. I have a friend who is celibate and has a problem with men...she has gotten to the point where she tells guys almost immediately that she is celibate...which of course scares them off but she figures she might as well get it over with. Ill pass this on to her bc it makes a lot of sense.
 
JenFleets said:
I finally found one!!! :creatures

He's willing to wait until I'm ready (which will most likely be after I'm married). He's not a virgin but I am partly b/c of years of childhood molestation.
Click to expand...

Umm, wow Congrats!:yep:
I wish there were some type of Celibate Dating (is that an oxymoron.LOL) group or something, because every guy I meet is willing to wait, but only to the extent of being a gentleman, and to be honest I would rather chill with a celibate partner. I was lucky enough to meet a guy a while ago, who didn't label himself as celibate, but he liked to wait until sex was "the icing on the cake" so to speak. I stopped talking to him because he had big arms:ohwell:.
 
vivmaiko said:
The worst kind are the men who pretend like they are okay with celibacy and then keep trying to get you to "change your mind" because they think you must be cellibate because:
1. You don't know how good sex is
2. You are waiting for the right man (this is for those who are waiting for marriage) and he is the right one (or so he thinks :rolleyes:)

I don't understand why men like that hang around. Do they commit to something and find it is more than they bargained for or do they love the challenge of trying to get you to bed?
Click to expand...

Whenever I hear this, I get immediately turned off. I'm usually looking at him like "don't tell me what I know!"
 
It is possible. (But rare.) My fiancé and I have been together for five years, and have remained celibate throughout the relationship.
 
it is hard. i've only had one guy who didn't pressure for sex, but i think it might have been a reason he stopped calling.:ohwell:

it's hurtful for someone not to want you just because you wont give it up, but there are plenty others ladies who choose to have sex (nothing wrong with that) and they still have problems finding someone.

it also irks when a guy wants the goods, but has yet to talk about being in a relationship.:rolleyes:
 
Wow. Kudos to the both of you!

As for me, yes, I believe it is possible to find like-minded individuals who will be okay with being celibate. However, most want you to 'compensate' with 'other things'... and that is a whole other thread. . .
Queen V said:
It is possible. (But rare.) My fiancé and I have been together for five years, and have remained celibate throughout the relationship.
Click to expand...
 
Embria said:
Umm, wow Congrats!:yep:
I wish there were some type of Celibate Dating (is that an oxymoron.LOL) group or something, because every guy I meet is willing to wait, but only to the extent of being a gentleman, and to be honest I would rather chill with a celibate partner. I was lucky enough to meet a guy a while ago, who didn't label himself as celibate, but he liked to wait until sex was "the icing on the cake" so to speak. I stopped talking to him because he had big arms:ohwell:.
Click to expand...

Girl, I'm mad that I just read that! :lachen:
 
Much2much41 said:
I've done it successfully, with some FIONE @ss men, I might add. I only had one ask me flat out for sex. The rest were celibate also, so we had no problems.
Click to expand...

CO-SIGN!!!!!

I have not had a problem meeting or keeping men with my celibate status. Nine times out of 10 I can tell very early on (like week 1) who won't be able to handle it so I diplomatically and respectfully tell them what the deal is so that nobody's time is wasted.

The others are just like "Ok." and we press on. It's not easy, but I think once you commit to not even entertaining the idea, it becomes much easier to weed out guys who can't deal...and you attract those who will. :yep:
 
A college buddy claims to be celibate. I was impressed because I don't know any other men that claim to be celibate.
 
Country gal said:
A college buddy claims to be celibate. I was impressed because I don't know any other men that claim to be celibate.
Click to expand...

Man I used to find ALL of them. I was involved with virgins-in-the-closet all of the time until MisterMan came along. My girl friends were all amazed. They nicknamed me "The Virgin Whisperer". :rolleyes:
 
Well my last BF was celibate as am I (abstinent). I'm very excited to find those types of guys, but it's hard. I'm just glad that they can weed themselves out if they are expecting more.

I've noticed that the guys who simply see me as a Short Term Relationship will have more of an issue than the guys who actually see a future with me. Oh well, their loss.:rolleyes:
 
I have an amazing guy friend who's holding out till marriage. But he's exclusively dates white women. So I cant hand out his business card to anyone on LHCF. lol :lachen:
 
Divine Inspiration said:
CO-SIGN!!!!!

I have not had a problem meeting or keeping men with my celibate status. Nine times out of 10 I can tell very early on (like week 1) who won't be able to handle it so I diplomatically and respectfully tell them what the deal is so that nobody's time is wasted.

The others are just like "Ok." and we press on. It's not easy, but I think once you commit to not even entertaining the idea, it becomes much easier to weed out guys who can't deal...and you attract those who will. :yep:
Click to expand...


Just curious, where are you all finding these guys?
 
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