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I think the reason many of us are stuck at shoulder length is because we don't protective style. So our ends keep rubbing on our clothes in addition to being dried by the air so they break off or split and later break off. Majority of people who have gone beyond shoulder to APL and BSL are protective stylers.
I've been trying to wear my hair is a bun but my S/O hates it..... he's always on my case to wear my hair down.