Getting Stuck In the Wrong Relationship?

[StarScream35]

My girlfriend has been in a 12 month relationship with a guy who is psychological and emotionally abusive at times. She claims he treats her well but I beg to differ because the stuff she tells me makes me go . Like yesterday over dinner her and I started talking about him and she went on to say he told her that his ex girlfriend was a stronger sista than she was because the ex was apparently more outspoken. I told her to dump him and what she said next kinda made me wonder do most women have this same issue?

So she said she doesn't want to be single again and have to date. She's knows how crazy and disappointing dating has been for me and she wants no part of it. I simply told her each person is different but she wasn't hearing all that.

Another thing puzzled me was another incident she relayed. She said they were out downtown and two good looking brothas walked up to her man and told him he was lucky to have a beautiful woman like her. When the two guys walked off she said he told her had it been his ex, she would have told them off. I was like WTF! Who says mess like that! HE should have been proud that other dudes were giving him promps for his lady!

I don't know what to tell her anymore. Your thoughts?

I know one thing, this makes me think dating isn't so bad after all!

 

[LoveBeautyKisses]

Some woman put up with the BS just to say "I have a man."

Esteem issues.

I used to be that way.
She should have walked off with the other guy.

He tries to downplay her beauty.

 

[runwaydream]

Hes clearly not over his ex

 

[ThickHair]

The ole "A man is better than no man attitude." That is a danger to one's mental health.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

If he likes his ex so much, he needs to get back together with her.

No, I don't have any personal friends in a relationship or marriage who is dealing with a verbally or emotionally abusive man. Some of the ex boyfriends, well that is a different story.

 

[RocStar]

Weak sauce

 

[StarScream35]

She really is a lovely lady and I told her if she didn't want to do online dating she could join social groups but she is terrified. I just don't understand her and really don't understand him. He's got a sista the brotha are dying to have and don't even appreciate it. What is this world coming to!!

 

[awhyley]

Hes clearly not over his ex

Doesn't matter. He's trying to control her, make it so that she never leaves. Like she's lucky to have him around. I'm sure that last relationship ended because HE got dumped. Your friend needs to do the same.

 

[Blyss_curls]

Be there for her. It's really all you can do. You can't want more for her, than she wants for herself.

Always tell her how special she is to you, and mirror her good qualities back to her. Be careful about what you say in regard to him. You don't want her to feel she can't talk to you about him, at all. Which will happen if you're always saying negative things about him to her.

Check out information on sites that deal w/violence against women. They may have tips about helping friends in emotionally abusive relationships.
RAINN is a good one.