Do you want to come off as being as good or better then white women?

[shynessqueen]

I thought about this from one of hannagirl thread. I know most of us just want long healthy hair for ourselves but do you want to come a cross as equal or better then white women? Is saying see our hair can grow that long too, is saying I"m equal when it comes to hair.
If you do want to be equal or better then white women, is it bad to think that way. I want long hair because i want to see how long i can grow my hair but i also want to stand out. Some of y'all know how i feel about dark skin women with long hair. I'm just being honest.
No I have not been drinking. lol.
I just really want to know so please don't run to the mods about my thread. Thank you plove

 

[cmw45]

Umkay dear, ur gonna have to change your tagline...shynessquess...I don't think so...how bout'...you wanna be startin' somethin', got to be startin' somethin' (Jacko music plays in the background)...

Honestly, I really don't believe that there is a great appreciation within the black community or out of it about how beautiful black hair can be when it is taken care of...so yea, I would like to one day be a testament to beautiful black hair.

 

[Isis]

I thought about this from one of hannagirl thread. I know most of us just want long healthy hair for ourselves but do you want to come a cross as equal or better then white women? Is saying see our hair can grow that long too, is saying I"m equal when it comes to hair.
If you do want to be equal or better then white women, is it bad to think that way. I want long hair because i want to see how long i can grow my hair but i also want to stand out. Some of y'all know how i feel about dark skin women with long hair. I'm just being honest.
No I have not been drinking. lol.
I just really want to know so please don't run to the mods about my thread. Thank you plove

I don't compare myself or my hair to other women, including white women. I don't believe growing one's hair long has anything to do with another race of women. IMO, saying your hair can grow long is setting an intention and yes, it is saying you are equal when it comes to hair. I believe we as women (black. white or yellow) are already equal, period.

 

[Hidden_Angel]

I don't compare myself or my hair to other women, including white women.

I cann't wait to have this mode of confidnce

 

[sugarose]

I don't compare myself or my hair to other women, including white women. I don't believe growing one's hair long has anything to do with another race of women. IMO, saying your hair can grow long is setting an intention and yes, it is saying you are equal when it comes to hair. I believe we as women (black. white or yellow) are already equal, period.

I totally agree. My wanting long hair has nothing to do with anything other than I want long hair.

 

[Mom23]

I totally agree. My wanting long hair has nothing to do with anything other than I want long hair.

I agree. I am growing my hair for me, and I don't compare myself to anyone else.

 

[delecie]

I don't compare myself or my hair to other women, including white women. I don't believe growing one's hair long has anything to do with another race of women. I believe we as women (black. white or yellow) are already equal, period.

I agree with Isis. Whatever I do in the realm of health and beauty is for me. I love myself so I'm working on being healthy and beautiful for myself. It makes me really sad to think that there are women who equate hair length with equality. Sisters, don't allow your self worth to be tied up in your hair!

 

[guesswho]

I thought about this from one of hannagirl thread. I know most of us just want long healthy hair for ourselves but do you want to come a cross as equal or better then white women? Is saying see our hair can grow that long too, is saying I"m equal when it comes to hair.
If you do want to be equal or better then white women, is it bad to think that way. I want long hair because i want to see how long i can grow my hair but i also want to stand out. Some of y'all know how i feel about dark skin women with long hair. I'm just being honest.
No I have not been drinking. lol.
I just really want to know so please don't run to the mods about my thread. Thank you plove

Being better or comparing myself to white woman is never in my mind furthermore actually thinking of them whilst I'm growing my hair! Oh hell no! The 2 dosent go together for me I'm just growing my hair because I want to challenge myself to see how long my hair could grow if I take good care of it, it have absolutely nothing to do with any white women, I'm feeling weird actually answering this question I have never ever thought about this in my life, white women and my hair? They both do not go together at all, that's for me at least, I'm actually interested to hear if other ladies think of comparing who's better or equal white women or us because of hair! God made everybody and I just don't think of things like this I just live my life in a god fearing way and thank god for each day.....

 

[mkh_77]

Some of y'all know how i feel about dark skin women with long hair. I'm just being honest.

How do you feel about dark skinned women with long hair?

 

[Lynnerie]

The color of your skin or length/texture of your hair doesn't make you less or more of a woman. So no... I dont compare myself to other women. Like the others said Its a personal challenge and I like long hair.

 

[camellia]

No.

I think long hair is beautiful when it's healthy and that's what I want. I had long hair as a child until I burned it off with too much heat.

I don't feel the need to compete with other races for anything.

 

[B_Phlyy]

I agree with Isis. Whatever I do in the realm of health and beauty is for me. I love myself so I'm working on being healthy and beautiful for myself. It makes me really sad to think that there are women who equate hair length with equality. Sisters, don't allow your self worth to be tied up in your hair!

I agree.

Saying that I think I'm as good as or better than someone because of their hairlength would imply that I'm in some type of competition and race and that is not what your hair journey is about.

My hair is my hair and it's grows at it's own pace and it'll get to where it's going when it gets there. No need to compete with someone else.

 

[tld723]

First let me state that I want long hair because I want long hair. Superficial things like having long hair, nice nails, clothes, driving the right car, will NEVER make you feel better than any one else, or equal to anyone else, be they white, red yellow black, or any SHADE of black. Having self respect and self love is what makes people of all races equal.

 

[shynessqueen]

I think i should have worded this better. I'm going to try to word this better. When we say let's brake the myth about black women can't grow long hair as non-black or white women hair are we saying see we are equal when it comes to hair. I'm not saying white women are better then us as human and women. I'm only asking about hair that's it.

 

[Bosslady1]

I like the question that you posed shyness...

Whatever a person's intentions are shall be so!

Me...I want both. To get the proper respect: Oh Black girls can have long hair!...from every freaking race! And for myself...Hmmm, I can grow my hair to MSL!

 

[Poohbear]

No, I do not want to be better than white women in the process of growing long hair. That's ridiculous to think that way. No one is better than anyone. And having long hair doesn't make you better than someone with short hair. Plus, black women in general can grow long hair anyway, and there's some white women who have trouble growing long hair like some black women. Long hair isn't exclusive to just one race of people.

And what about dark skinned women with long hair? shynessqueen, the length that your hair grows is NOT determined by your skin color. It's all based on so many different factors: and to name a few.... 1) how well you take care of your hair in order to retain the hair length that you grow, 2) proper diet, and 3) genetics...and not all blacks within the black race have the same hair growth genes and not all whites within the white race have the same growth genes...that's a BIG misconception so many people have.

 

[camellia]

I think i should have worded this better. I'm going to try to word this better. When we say let's brake the myth about black women can't grow long hair as non-black or white women hair are we saying see we are equal when it comes to hair. I'm not saying white women are better then us as human and women. I'm only asking about hair that's it.

I never bought into the "black women can't grow hair" myth so I never felt the need to break it. The black women in my family have long and healthy hair.


Honestly, my hair is longer than that of most of the white women I know already. My goal length is more than most people want.

 

[Bint Yusef]

I dont believe a discussion like this can ever be honest. That is not to diss anyone here at all, but a lot of the times we are not aware of the influences of other people's culture and world view on our minds. A lot of the things we do and perceive as beautiful are socialized and based on someone's cultural norms, and being the diaspora its usually not our own.

 

[Poohbear]

I think i should have worded this better. I'm going to try to word this better. When we say let's brake the myth about black women can't grow long hair as non-black or white women hair are we saying see we are equal when it comes to hair. I'm not saying white women are better then us as human and women. I'm only asking about hair that's it.

I guess I cannot relate to where you're coming from because I've never said "Lets break the myth about black women can't grow long hair."

Before I discovered LHCF, I had armpit length hair which is what I consider long. In middle school and high school, I was considered the black girl with long hair. I felt like it had everything to do with hair care. Then in 2003, I took Accutane which started to thin my hair so I cut it to chin length thinking it would thicken my hair. When I discovered LHCF, I was amazed at seeing black ladies here with waist length hair....but you know what? It's rare that I see white women with waist length hair too. With the help of LHCF in 2004, I grew my hair to a few inches passed my shoulders, and then went natural.

So I never saw it as a truth that black women can't grow long hair. It is a myth because we CAN grow long hair. All women regardless of race have to take good care of their hair in order to retain the length that grows out of their scalp.

And from my experience, most of the black and white women I see have shoulder length hair. I believe most women who have hair that length keep it cut at that length. Some may not even care about growing their hair long like us here on the online hair boards. And yes, there are some who do want to grow their hair long who are not on online hair boards. But it's not just black women! There's white women who desire long hair too who haven't had it in their lifetime before.

 

[firecracker]

I don't think a black woman wanting long hair as anything to do with the wyte woman at all. Me myself I want different lengths for different hairstyles. I love short and medium length hair as much as I like full bsl.
I don't care for waist length or longer hair at all.

 

[shynessqueen]

No, I do not want to be better than white women in the process of growing long hair. That's ridiculous to think that way. No one is better than anyone. And having long hair doesn't make you better than someone with short hair. Plus, black women in general can grow long hair anyway, and there's some white women who have trouble growing long hair like some black women. Long hair isn't exclusive to just one race of people.

And what about dark skinned women with long hair? shynessqueen, the length that your hair grows is NOT determined by your skin color. It's all based on so many different factors: and to name a few.... 1) how well you take care of your hair in order to retain the hair length that you grow, 2) proper diet, and 3) genetics...and not all blacks within the black race have the same hair growth genes and not all whites within the white race have the same growth genes...that's a BIG misconception so many people have.

um where are you getting this from my post. ITA with the part in the bold. MY question is more about what is behind saying we can brake the myth about black women hair. that's all. I get the felling only a few people seem to know what I'm asking.

 

[crlsweetie912]

I agree. I am growing my hair for me, and I don't compare myself to anyone else.

OMG! Tulips are my favorite too! love your siggy!!!

 

[Dee-Licious]

To be honest.


I don't see a competition between my hair and white women's hair, but I do see myself comparing my hair to other black women's hair. Not on hair boads, but in real life I do a comparison to myself.

 

[bravenewgirl87]

I won't lie.... 2% of me has considered this as a motive for long hair. When i was in college, i was hanging with some folx. A white guy and I got into and he made a statement about my new haircut, saying that i couldn't grow my own hair and that is why i wear weaves or braids. Truth be told... it really made me want to shave my head just to spite his silly tail. Long before i found this site, i had made up my mind that i just wouldn't look good with crazy long hair.. and anyone who knows me agrees that it does nothing for my face. I do aspire to have healthy hair and i am not mad at any black woman who wants BSL or longer. Although, i don't intend to go any longer than APL natural hair ( too long IHO)... i want to help black women grow long heaithy hair. I use LHCF as a catalyst for that; This website has inspired me to possibly change my major to chemistry, become a cosmetics chemist and join a big company like L'oreal or Clariol. I realize how sensitive so many black women are about this subject matter. I find it very odd that the ingredients in products marketed for whites are not present in products marketed for blacks.... is it a conspiracy? :scratchch:

 

[shynessqueen]

I won't lie.... 2% of me has considered this as a motive for long hair. When i was in college, i was hanging with some folx. A white guy and I got into and he made a statement about my new haircut, saying that i couldn't grow my own hair and that is why i wear weaves or braids. Truth be told... it really made me want to shave my head just to spite his silly tail. Long before i found this site, i had made up my mind that i just wouldn't look good with crazy long hair.. and anyone who knows me agrees that it does nothing for my face. I do aspire to have healthy hair and i am not mad at any black woman who wants BSL or longer. Although, i don't intend to go any longer than APL natural hair ( too long IHO)... i want to help black women grow long heaithy hair. I use LHCF as a catalyst for that; This website has inspired me to possibly change my major to chemistry, become a cosmetics chemist and join a big company like L'oreal or Clariol. I realize how sensitive so many black women are about this subject matter. I find it very odd that the ingredients in products marketed for whites are not present in products marketed for blacks.... is it a conspiracy? :scratchch:

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for your honesty.

 

[cheetarah1980]

I'm going to be honest, when I was a little girl wanting long hair had everything to do with wanting to be like my white classmates. It's difficult growing up in an environment where nobody looks like you and all the little girls who are considered cute have long flowing pigtails and you have short nubby braids with barretts. I couldn't figure out why in the world my hair didn't look like theirs. And then I would get the chance to see other young black girls and some of them would have long hair too. It made me wonder why not me.
At six years old I didn't realize that my mother's means of caring for my hair (relaxers, no conditioning treatments, hot combs, excessive heat, no protective styles, etc.) were preventing my hair from growing. As I got older I quickly realized that every time I left my hair alone (long stints with braided extenstions) my hair would grow. But as soon as I got a bit of length I'd go back to the bad hair habits so I could have straight hair like the rest of my classmates.
I stopped comparing my hair to white people's in high school. But that only shifted the comparison to other black girls. After a while growing long hair became about proving something to myself. Because of my hair's thickness I always believed it could grow longer than shoulder length, but it never did. That is until I went natural in 2004. My hair is now APL when stretched and everyone I know marvels at how long my hair has gotten. The odd thing is, I still look at my hair as short because that's all it's ever been. If my hair grows to BSL I still don't think I'll view it as long. But I'll be happy with that length because my hair has never seen it before and it'll be nice to know that my hair CAN and DOES grow. It just needs TLC. Hope this answered your question.

 

[bravenewgirl87]

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for your honesty.

Now... I am not saying nothing:
But, i think the asian and white wm are jealous that black wm got the big tatties, ASSets, almond eyes, never age, heck i could go on forever. I think that they could do better research for our products but they choose not to. Jealousy, man. They never did like us... ever since slaverylachen:

 

[InnerSoul]

I don't compare myself or my hair to other women, including white women. I don't believe growing one's hair long has anything to do with another race of women. IMO, saying your hair can grow long is setting an intention and yes, it is saying you are equal when it comes to hair. I believe we as women (black. white or yellow) are already equal, period.

I agree with this too(part in bolded).

 

[tsiporah]

I thought about this from one of hannagirl thread. I know most of us just want long healthy hair for ourselves but do you want to come a cross as equal or better then white women? Is saying see our hair can grow that long too, is saying I"m equal when it comes to hair.
If you do want to be equal or better then white women, is it bad to think that way. I want long hair because i want to see how long i can grow my hair but i also want to stand out. Some of y'all know how i feel about dark skin women with long hair. I'm just being honest.
No I have not been drinking. lol.
I just really want to know so please don't run to the mods about my thread. Thank you plove

As I have stated on another thread..hair simply grows...so it is not about being better than white women.

I have enough confidence to say, I want my hair to grow because I want it to grow and not because of white women or to compete with them- that spells insecurity which people say black women are. I already know that I come from a line of "originals" so why 'compete' with someone else?

Tsipy

 

[Crackers Phinn]

To be honest.


I don't see a competition between my hair and white women's hair, but I do see myself comparing my hair to other black women's hair. Not on hair boads, but in real life I do a comparison to myself.

Same here.

Although, I'm going to have to agree with OnAHairQuest, without an anonymous function I doubt alot of people will be honest on the subject. Even if you felt the way SQ stated, most people would be afraid/ashamed to state it publicly for fear of being judged as weak or self hating.