When I was a kid, I didn't have this problem. My hair was long, thick and healthy, just like my mother's and sisters'.
But during adolescence, I messed it up, and ended up with really short, broken off, and horrible-looking hair. And that was hard, because my relatives were always bothering me about how I ruined my hair. And whenever I saw people who hadn't seen me in a while, the first thing they'd say was, "What happened to your hair?" And then there'd be all this head-shaking and speeches about how I should let my hair grow back because without it, I didn't fit into my family.
My sisters used to torment me about it too. I'd be watching BET with my older one and she'd make all these snide remarks about how men only liked girls with long hair, and that's why all the video girls had long, flowing weaves. And there was a kind of competition among us to see whose hair was longest...we called it Hair War. I never got to play in Hair War because I basically didn't have an army.
At school, them devil kids gave me no rest about how short and gross my hair was. I actually don't have any pictures from my middle school years (except for my graduation pics), because I would pull some Matrix type ish and disappear when I saw a camera. Writing it now, it sounds trivial, but my self-esteem really took a hit in those years. I always felt really ugly and embarrassed about my hair, unless I had some fake hair in. And people just never let it rest...every day, someone reminded me that I used to be beautiful.
But since my hair has been growing in, I've noticed mixed reactions. My mom is proud that I'm taking care of my hair, and she compliments me and takes my hair advice now. She doesn't understand my practices, so at first, she was making fun of me for baggying and buying a BSS's worth of conditioner. But now that there are actual results, she's adjusted her attitude.
My aunt is my closest relative...she doesn't even notice that my hair has grown. I love her alot, but she still gives me speeches about how I ruined my hair. I'm sure I'll get them even when I reach HL. I'll have to have floor length hair before she notices.
My sisters are...weird about it. My youngest is struggling alot with hers, but she won't take my advice. She acknowledges that my hair is doing well, but she just wants me to do her hair for her and doesn't want to do it on her own. I'm going to start doing that this summer, because I notice that people bother her because of her hair too, and I don't want her to feel bad about herself. I can't now because I'm away at school for most of the time.
My younger sister doesn't care what my hair is doing, because her's is still a bit longer. And my older sister was pretty bad in the beginning. Always making fun of what I do and stuff. But since my hair is finally longer than hers, she's gotten real quiet as of late. She still makes snide remarks sometimes, but her heart is clearly not in it anymore.
And I don't know what other folks who used to make fun of my hair would say now. I can still see many of them (our families run in the same circles), but whenever they are going to be somewhere, I don't go there. I'm still really bitter, and only God knows what I would say to them, so I just try to stay away. Plus, I don't have enough hair to slap them in the face with it yet.
Anyway, I feel better about my hair now. I feel like there are still lots of things wrong with it, but I still love it and I know it will get better. Shoot, all the time I spend with it, I better love it.
Sorry for the novel!