Dealing with Exs after Marriage

[ChasingBliss]

After I got married, I changed my number. There were a two stubborn ex's that would call me randomly even though they knew of my relationship and marriage. Then I started receiving calls from a blocked number in the middle of the night. I dont understand why seemingly mature people would get so stupid over something like this. So I did some thinking and decided to change the number. If that was too drastic, OH WELL.

I dont believe in communicating on any level with ex's after marriage. What for? Why are they even calling still?

Did any of you married ladies have to deal with ex's? How?

 

[Fine 4s]

I totally agree!!!! That's a serious bond, marriage. Even my exes today know that we're not REALLY friends no matter how cool we are. We know the deal. Exes from decades ago though I might allow with some strong strong boundaries - there would NOT be many of those. I hear ya....

 

[ElizaBlue]

Yep....a couple of my exs raised up when they found out I was engaged, but I just put a stake through both them vampires...lol.

But both his exs are just doing the most, especially since they found out we got married. He is doing just that changing his phone number. We talked about how could we handle the daughter's mom because she was blowing him up with texts. But lately after educating her on the state law and penalty for electronic harassment she has stopped.

I don't know why it's so hard for folks to move on, when they find out someone else has.

 

[dede1129]

My Ex Husband is a really good friend of mine now Turns out we are better as friends and parents than life mates

 

[ThickHair]

^^^ITA ExHusband and I should have never married. We were great bf\gf (no kids involved). I use to not get folks being together forever without never marrying, but now I get it. I am not talking about shacking couples either, I talking about bf\gf who do not live together, cool set up.

 

[MuseofTroy]

After I got married, I changed my number. There were a two stubborn ex's that would call me randomly even though they knew of my relationship and marriage. Then I started receiving calls from a blocked number in the middle of the night. I dont understand why seemingly mature people would get so stupid over something like this. So I did some thinking and decided to change the number. If that was too drastic, OH WELL.

I dont believe in communicating on any level with ex's after marriage. What for? Why are they even calling still?

Did any of you married ladies have to deal with ex's? How?

OP your situation doesn't surprise me at all. Some men have serious EGOS that won't allow them to let go of previous girlfriends. They don't care about you when you are single but as soon as another man comes into the picture and the relationship becomes serious (ie engagement or marriage), suddenly they want to pop up and get reacquainted. Men are territorial and the idea that another man having you mentally, spiritually, and physically bothers them, especially if they aren’t in a relationship with someone else. Some men like the idea of their exes being single thinking that no one else compares to them but that’s not reality. I’m all for women moving on to happy and healthy relationships! Something similar happened to me. An ex-boyfriend who I’m not even speaking to is suddenly hitting me up after running into my significant other and I at a mutual friend’s party. The bottom line is that I’m very happy with my new relationship and don’t even think about ex-boyfriends. I won’t change my number either because I shouldn’t have to inconvenience myself.

 

[sylver2]

my ex-dh and i are really good friends. he's like a brother to me. we dont talk as much but we are on great terms.

 

[Highly Favored8]

OP your situation doesn't surprise me at all. Some men have serious EGOS that won't allow them to let go of previous girlfriends. They don't care about you when you are single but as soon as another man comes into the picture and the relationship becomes serious (ie engagement or marriage), suddenly they want to pop up and get reacquainted. Men are territorial and the idea that another man having you mentally, spiritually, and physically bothers them, especially if they aren’t in a relationship with someone else. Some men like the idea of their exes being single thinking that no one else compares to them but that’s not reality. I’m all for women moving on to happy and healthy relationships! Something similar happened to me. An ex-boyfriend who I’m not even speaking to is suddenly hitting me up after running into my significant other and I at a mutual friend’s party. The bottom line is that I’m very happy with my new relationship and don’t even think about ex-boyfriends. I won’t change my number either because I shouldn’t have to inconvenience myself.

Very well said!

 

[kandake]

^^^ITA ExHusband and I should have never married. We were great bf\gf (no kids involved). I use to not get folks being together forever without never marrying, but now I get it. I am not talking about shacking couples either, I talking about bf\gf who do not live together, cool set up.

I completely agree and understand everything you mentioned. My ex-dh and I had a great bf/gf relationship. Our marriage was bs. We should have never been married.

 

[ArrrBeee]

We had no children together. When he called me one day and started trying to make bs convo, I reminded him of our lack of ties. He said that he could call me anytime. I left work and went to the phone company and changed my number. Haven't spoken to him since.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

An ex from years ago kept calling for a while after I got married. He kept getting voice mail or DH. Once I finally was home to take his call, I told him that I was married (which I think he knew) and after he tried to one up me a few times (about some of his vacations) he let it got and stopped calling.

I'm cool with one ex who attended our wedding but we really don't talk much, just email once in a while and a text for holidays.