Can you REALLY be a born again virgin????

[ChildlikeEmpress]

I think we might be getting too wrapped up in semantics here. Yes, it would be silly to attend a seminar and believe that this literally makes you a virgin again, and that you can now tell future partners, "You're the first." But as far as I know, that's not what it's about. The "virgin" term just means you're starting over with a clean slate spiritually, not physically, and that from this point on, you're saving yourself for marriage. That's the reason for the "Born-again" part that precedes it.

I don't understand what's offensive or confusing about it as long as the people who adhere to this philosophy don't lie about what they've done. And if using a particular term gives someone a psychological edge in staying true to their beliefs, that's just fine by me.

~R. :Rose:

 

[Poohbear]

The "virgin" term just means you're starting over with a clean slate spiritually, not physically, and that from this point on, you're saving yourself for marriage. That's the reason for the "Born-again" part that precedes it.

Exactly... thanks for pointing that out.

 

[BerrySweet]

You can practice abstinence, but as far as being a "born-again" Virgin...once your "first act" has passed, there it went.

Thats how I feel but I guess it really comes down to the person and their relationship with the Lord.

 

[cocoberry10]

I understand what you're saying. Yet I see it as God forgiving you for your sins, although you still have to reap what you sow physically and spiritually.

When you have sex with a man, you allow his spirit to enter you. You can't act like you don't know what it is to spiritually connect with a man when you do. You're forgiven, but one of the consequences of having sex is no longer being a virgin - on any level. It is true that Jesus redeems our sins... but unlike a virgin you still know what its like to be with a man regardless of your repentance and vow of celibacy. A virgin has no experience of a spiritual or physical connection with a man through sex. That's how I see it anyway. I hope I'm explaining my view well enough.

I agree. I don't think born-again virgins are pretending to be virgins. They realize that their sins are washed in the Blood of the Lamb (Jesus), and that they are like new. Not to be funny or crazy, but I compare it to getting a facial, where they slough off the old (dead) skin cells, and the new, radiant skin is glowing and looks more pure. Basically, it's a fancy term for renewed celibacy! At least that's how I see it.

 

[BerrySweet]

I agree. I don't think born-again virgins are pretending to be virgins. They realize that their sins are washed in the Blood of the Lamb (Jesus), and that they are like new. Not to be funny or crazy, but I compare it to getting a facial, where they slough off the old (dead) skin cells, and the new, radiant skin is glowing and looks more pure. Basically, it's a fancy term for renewed celibacy! At least that's how I see it.

That's an excellent way of putting it.

 

[gone_fishing]

You can practice celibacy and you can even explain to your mate the fact that you practice celibacy but if you tell him you're a virgin (because in your head you're born again) - that makes you a liar.

Let me explain further, I don't care if a woman calls herself a born again virgin. I know what it means but if she leaves out the born again part OR she tells a man she's a virgin then she needs to be pinched - back into reality.

Someone said something about the hymen as well and it can be surgically fixed to make you a virgin. Virginity is not defined by having the hymen intact. In fact, you could have ruptured your hymen and still be a virgin.

 

[frizzy]

... "only to an amnesiac .

But even on the spiritual side, my answer is still "no". Just be thankful that God will forgive us for our sins. He's not buying the fancy wordage.

 

[ChocalateDiva]

Technically, I am not sure if one can be a born again virgin or not. BUT- I did run around callin myself one when I was celibate for 18 months!!

 

[*Muffin*]

While a person can never physically be a virgin again once they've lost it, I believe that you can reaffirm your virginity status in spirit. A lot of times people are raped and forced into the act of sex without their permission. These people have every right to claim spiritual virginity because it was taken without their permission. Also, some people lead promiscuous lives before they discovered God because they didn't know any better. They can choose to stop engaging premarital sex and reaffirm their spiritual virginity.

 

[golden bronze]

I think that Chaucer once wrote if virginity was a contest who can win?

I should state that I am a virgin...technically, but I have committed sexual sin. If I had it to do over, I would've never done it. I am now waiting until marriage.

I also don't have a problem with Born Again Virgins.

Celibacy until marriage is what God asks from us to keep us sexually pure. Virginity is NOT the qualifier for holiness, because we are justified by faith first; our actions are an indication of our faith.

I think the state of a person's heart and right relationship with God is more important than a hymen.

Therefore, you can have committed a sexual sin and repented, and that does not make you "used" it makes you redeemed. It makes you obediant to God's word, and he will bless you for respecting and loving His word.

I guess I am just struggling with this idea of the value we place on virginity, because not all of what we think about these topics are related to God's word. Don't get me wrong, I think virginity is a good thing but I think that the mind state of the person practicing celibacy is better.

I think that if you have sinned and made the choice to be celibate, you should not feel that your virtue is somehow so maligned that you have to rename it something else. The power of the blood has washed your sin away, but your redemption is a testimony, and if you remove the testimony what credit is that to you or those who know you. It means something when someone is able to show how God delivered them from an affliction.

I also think we have to remember is some of us had no choice in losing our virginity. If someone is raped, for example, do they no longer qualify as a virgin? Many of our girls are abused at young ages..4,5,6 years old. They grow up feeling as if because their choice was taken from them they no longer can say no, or worse they have to say yes to avoid being raped. By the time they figure it out, they feel as if their virtue cannot be restored, when in truth, after the rape, their virtue remained in tact, because they committed no sin.

Just some thoughts....

 

[golden bronze]

I think that Chaucer once wrote if virginity was a contest who can win?

I should state that I am a virgin...technically, but I have committed sexual sin. If I had it to do over, I would've never done it. I am now waiting until marriage.

I also don't have a problem with Born Again Virgins.

Celibacy until marriage is what God asks from us to keep us sexually pure. Virginity is NOT the qualifier for holiness, because we are justified by faith first; our actions are an indication of our faith.

I think the state of a person's heart and right relationship with God is more important than a hymen.

Therefore, you can have committed a sexual sin and repented, and that does not make you "used" it makes you redeemed. It makes you obediant to God's word, and he will bless you for respecting and loving His word.

I guess I am just struggling with this idea of the value we place on virginity, because not all of what we think about these topics are related to God's word. Don't get me wrong, I think virginity is a good thing but I think that the mind state of the person practicing celibacy is better.

I think that if you have sinned and made the choice to be celibate, you should not feel that your virtue is somehow so maligned that you have to rename it something else. The power of the blood has washed your sin away, but your redemption is a testimony, and if you remove the testimony what credit is that to you or those who know you. It means something when someone is able to show how God delivered them from an affliction.

I also think we have to remember is some of us had no choice in losing our virginity. If someone is raped, for example, do they no longer qualify as a virgin? Many of our girls are abused at young ages..4,5,6 years old. They grow up feeling as if because their choice was taken from them they no longer can say no, or worse they have to say yes to avoid being raped. By the time they figure it out, they feel as if their virtue cannot be restored, when in truth, after the rape, their virtue remained in tact, because they committed no sin.

Just some thoughts....

 

[chicacanella]

yep....................................

 

[motherx2esq]

I agree. Do not get stuck on whats its called but what it means. Otherwise you may never be able to move forward with the real purpose.

I utterly agree here! Very well said!

 

[NGraceO]

I believe that you can be a non-virgin to the world, but a virgin in God's eyes (once you have repented from your sexual sin)!

I totally agree...

 

[Farida]

I do feel many of these programs were created to help young women who had slipped along the way to make right with God and regain some self esteem. Not to lie and mislead people.

Because let's face it, so much weight is placed on virginity ( I recall all the talks and sermons I received as a young woman) that some women and girls are made to feel that once the sin is committed they are worthless.

We all know that whether willingly or due to rape, once it is gone, it is gone, but not all is lost. I don't think a woman is any less of a precious being without it.

Right now I have a friend, and she's not the first I've known to have the problem, who was engaged, she lost her virginity to the man in question, and he later called off the wedding. This girl would not leave him be. She stalked him and bothered him even though he told her plainly that he didn't want her. It even got to the point where she allowed him to use her and treat her like an unpaid whore. One day we sat down, DH and I, and had a very stern conversation.

Turns out, she was clinging to this man for dear life, regardless of what he did or said to her, because she felt that she was now "damaged goods," "worthless" and no other man could possible want her. So, she felt, her only salvation in life is for him to be with her. When she saw that he wasn't going to take her back, she then turned to sleeping with any man she met, because she felt, "I'm no longer a virgin anyway, so what's the point?"

I do think it is very important to focus on the practical, spiritual and physical aspects of chastity - it is a much broader and spiritual term. It encompasses single, married, divorced, widowed, young or old women. Honoring God sexually as our station in life provides. Unmarried women - celibacy (regardless of virginity or not), married women, fidelity and sharing her body with her husband, not depriving him except for mutual consent, clergy and even some laymen, if choosing to take a vow of celibacy to serve God - honor it.

 

[Caramela]

No.
You can repent of fornication and not do it again and be forgiven of that sin.
But that special baptism etc to "become" a bav is bogus, not to mention it is not biblical.
Man and his traditions

 

[pearlygurl]

I think we might be getting too wrapped up in semantics here. Yes, it would be silly to attend a seminar and believe that this literally makes you a virgin again, and that you can now tell future partners, "You're the first." But as far as I know, that's not what it's about. The "virgin" term just means you're starting over with a clean slate spiritually, not physically, and that from this point on, you're saving yourself for marriage. That's the reason for the "Born-again" part that precedes it.

I don't understand what's offensive or confusing about it as long as the people who adhere to this philosophy don't lie about what they've done. And if using a particular term gives someone a psychological edge in staying true to their beliefs, that's just fine by me.

~R. :Rose:

I agree. Do not get stuck on whats its called but what it means. Otherwise you may never be able to move forward with the real purpose.

I agree...of course (at least I hope) none of these ladies are thinking that they are physically a virgin again (and telling people that) by using this term. And yes when we step outside of God's will for us there are consequences to those actions. However, I don't see any harm with using the term. "Born again virgin" and "celibate" end up meaning the same thing in the end anyway.

 

[dicapr]

If we can have born again christians, we can have born again virgins. It is a change of mindset-not a physical condition.

 

[moonglowdiva]

It sound legalistic to me. As christians we are under the grace of Jesus Christ. To answer the question, "Can you REALLY be a born again virgin?" You can be want to want to be.

 

[Guitarhero]

One cannot undo losing a leg, reversing first vision or hearing and unfortunately, losing a hymen through sex. One cannot undo having been born where he was born. God forgives sin but there are consequences to the physical. Celibacy is the proper response to fornication. It's a state of holiness but it is not a state of virginity. One cannot return to true, physical virginity, even through surgery. Sex has occurred. But one can definitely return to holiness and purity of heart.

 

[Lylddlebit]

~~~~~~~~Delete~~~~~~~~

 

[Laela]

Side note: The hymen can be broken in other ways besides intercourse (tampon use, physical exams, etc.) So a broken hymen and loss of virginity are two different things. It boggles my mind a young girl can engage in oral s-x or even anal and still consider herself a virgin.. Depending on which definition, everyone can have their own definition of what qualifies a "virgin".

Main Entry: 1vir·gin
Pronunciation: \ˈvər-jən\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French virgine, from Latin virgin-, virgo young woman, virgin
Date: 13th century

1 a : an unmarried woman devoted to religion b capitalized : virgo
2 a : an absolutely chaste young woman b : an unmarried girl or woman
3 capitalized : virgin mary
4 a : a person who has not had sexual intercourse b : a person who is inexperienced in a usually specified sphere of activity <a virgin in politics>
5 : a female animal that has never copulated


On the Spiritual side, being Born Again regenerates us into new creatures in Christ. All things have become new, as our sins are washed away by the Blood of Jesus. So I can understand why a church would use this program. I'm all for anything that encourages young people to keep their eyes focused on God and not listen to the enemy's lies that our sins can't be washed away or that we can't start a New Life, with a clean slate....and that would include sexual purity.