BSL+ ladies: Who Does Hair Themself & Who Goes to Salon?

[SkinnyMocah]

I'm the opposite.

I hadn't been to a salon in years because when I went to a black salon I didn't like what they did to it. Relax at the first sign of new growth (like every 4 weeks!!), slap some grease in it and sear it with a curling iron. Pick it out into some football helmet shaped thing and smile and say 'all done!' NO NO.

My hair is 4b, THIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCK. Very dry coarse and unmanageabe. I self relaxed and wore weaves and ponytails for years... till I found LHCF thru some friends on another board. Even so, I don't get the science of hair. I HATE to baby my hair. Not combing it? My hair would look like a rats nest. It's just too thick for that.

I started going to the dominicans 5 weeks ago. They don't yank combs through my hair. They pat my hair dry, not rub it with a towel. I get a wash, deep condition, roller set, and blow out of my roots every Saturday. I get the same stylist every week and she is very thorough. She doesn't yank or pull, she's quite gentle and my hair has never looked so good! She does a fabulous job, and I am experiencing much less breakage at home, lots of growth, and stronger hair than I was when I was doing my own.

I just can't grasp all that is needed to care for my hair at home, so I'd rather put that in someone else's hands and monitor the results. Of course my hair is not that long but I doubt I will go back to a black salon.

I will still self relax because I can't see paying $60 for something I've been doing myself for years. I do plan to stretch longer.

 

[Proudpiscean]

This is the same reason I stopped going to my salon . After I got home and saw I was bald on my temple from the blowdry after my touch up, I said NO MORE (and I paid $105) and decided to take matters into my own hands...I'm soooo much happier now.

Luckily it's not visible!
My hair looked great when I left the salon. I received sooo many compliments, but it's just not worth losing hair
That will never happen again!

 

[meaganita]

I guess you could say I'm "transitioning" into doing my own hair. I used to do my own hair all the time when I was younger and wore a relaxer. I never relied on a stylist for anything. But once I got older and started going to salons and stumbled on a really good stylist, I got hooked. My stylist is still great, but I know she doesn't love my hair as much as I do. Plus, she's always "voluntarily" trimming my hair for free. Which is cool, when I actually want a trim. But not so cool when I don't. She can also be kinda rough with the comb outs and uses a ton of heat to get my hair silky straight with the flat iron. So, I'm at the point where I'm ready to start learning how to do my own. I have to learn all over again since my hair is 100% natural now and it's also longer than it's ever been. So right now I'm working on finding the products and styling tools that I need to do things on my own....Slowly weaning myself off of salon/stylist dependency.

 

[A_Christian]

Like someone said earlier in the thread I've realized that nobody's going to be as gentle with my hair as me! I like going to the salon every now and then but I also love being able to do my hair from the comfort of my own home, use the products that I like, not be skimpy with the conditioner , gently comb my hair, have my Saturday mornings to do other things besides sit in the salon all day, and especially save some money!!!!! I've saved quite a bit by doing my hair myself.

 

[ClassicBeauty]

I do my own hair. I've done it every since I went off to college. The good salons were so expensive when I got to college that I figured out how to relax and rollerset my own hair. My stylist who did my hair when I was growing up basically taught me how to do my own hair.

When I first started going natural, I thought about going to a salon because I was afraid that it may break (everyone tried to scare me out of it), but they wanted to charge 40-50 for a press that would only last a week. I was like oh no! (I thought of a million other things that I could do with that money!) I go get a dry trim or cut every now and then, but that's about it. There have been special occasions that I went to a salon, but I really didn't think they did my hair any better than I do it. Another thing is that it takes me soooo long to dry my hair. I would rather be at home where I can be more comfortable. I can take a break and do something else for a few minutes, and I can wear a tank top and shorts-or less than that. (I get soooo hot under the dryer, but I cannot live without the hooded dryer!)

As for how they treat my hair, I think they are more gentle with my long hair because they don't know how to handle it. The stylists that I have been to are actually more gentle than I am, but I've only been to 2 since I decided to transition. Now that it's all natural, I don't even think about going to a salon. Partially because I like to use what I like to use on my hair, I don't want their advice on how to treat my hair, and I'm too cheap to spend the amount of money that they charge for long, natural hair.

 

[Chromia]

Err, uhhh, ummm..... weeeelllll......

Once upon a time, in college (when my hair was about shoulder length), i did manage to do a few shoddy rollersets, because i couldnt afford to go to the salon. But we're talking about 10 years ago now. *sigh* So...... lets just say its been a while!!!! Im gonna straight be stalking Macherieamour, and other's, Foktis to get myself ready for this. *smh*

So who has good roller setting tutorials in their Fokti? Could ya'all throw out some names for a sista?!!

I learned a lot about rollersetting from macherieamour's blog. Her tutorial is very helpful.

I also learned about rollersetting from these pages that I have bookmarked:
http://www.geocities.com/qreusgurl/Roller.html
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=1204
http://blackhairtalk.proboards30.com/index.cgi?board=general&action=display&thread=1122400231
http://longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=105033&highlight=magnetic
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=113600&page=3&highlight=duckbill
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=31790
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=7178

When you buy clips, make sure you buy the ones that slide all the way in, not the ones that just slide in up to the hinge on the clip. At Sally's these are the "All Purpose Clips", not the ones labeled "Double Prong Clips". If you get Annie brand clips get the "Slide-In Clips".

To answer your original question, I went to a salon every 2 weeks up until March 31. In April I called up my stylist and told her I'm not coming in anymore. She is too pushy about trimming with every touch-up and I was tired of her pressuring me, talking down to me, and overreacting when I got a touch-up and said "no trim this time". I got rid of her when I finally realized that trying to rationalize with her would not work.

Anyway, I've been doing my own hair at home, including rollersets. The first time I did a rollerset it took me more than an hour, but the last one took me 40 minutes.

I plan to go to a new stylist for touch-ups. Other than that, I may go to a stylist for a wedding I'm in later this year, but that's it.

 

[GoldenBreeze]

I've done my owe hair since I was in my late teens. I tried going to a stylist several times, and found I had no patience for it. The stylist was too heavy handed for my liking, and didn't listen to me. My last stylist visit I walked out with my hair 1/8 pressed, because the stylist simply refused to believe that my hair did not need the amount of heat she was trying to use. I absolutely refused to sit their and allow her to burn my hair out, especially since we had already had a disscussion about her heavy detangling.

Although I don't roller set my hair unless it is a special occation, I know how and do it when I want to. I have more problems with natural styles (twists, cornrows, frenchbraids, etc), than I do with straight styles. I'm trying to be more creative with styles for my natural unpressed/unflatironed hair, since I've spent most of my life as a heat straightened natural.

ETA: I'm seriously considering going back to being heat straightened. Trying to learn to cornrow is proving to be a hugh challenge.

 

[HollyGolightly1982]

Im always grabbing her hand saying "mami pelo es muy fino,mucho molesta"...

 

[HollyGolightly1982]

I went back to my old stylist after doing my own hair for three years and I will NEVER go back to her again. I asked for layers and she CUT off about 2 inches of length from the back. Not to mention I asked to be telaxed and she damn near straightened my hair and burned my scalp. I'll be self telaxing from now on.


For those who self telax what do you use?

 

[eunique]

My mom's a stylist. She takes good care of me, I trust her with my hair but she's also teaching me to be independent of her so I don't freak out when I get to Howard this fall. I voted other.

 

[curlcomplexity]

My last visit to a salon was a tragic one. The woman who was supposed to do my hair went out of town and out of desperation I sat in another woman's chair. I figured that since everyone's hair who went to the shop was long and flawless, it wouldn't matter who did it ...WRONG!!! That ***** used $3.99 FABULAXER on my hair instead of the MIZANI that was advertized. Then after washing, she began styling my hair WITHOUT DEEP CONDITIONING. Then she had the nerve to say that I shouldn't have stretched my relaxers (I did a 5 mth stretch) and she "trimmed" 3 INCHES off!!! I asked for a blow out and press, do you know this ***** took a pic attachment to my wet hair. Tears slid down my cheeks as I felt more of my hair break off and hit the floor. To finish it off, she took some grease and a marcel iron and pressed it out, my hair never felt so awful.

I haven't been to a salon in over 2 years and I don't plan on going back. Since I'ver been taking care of my hair, it has gotten thicker and MUCH longer! The only exception to this would be my graduation day and my wedding, and this is only to get it styled dry, I will wash my hair myself.


P.S. Just as a rule of thumb....DON'T LET A STYLIST TOUCH YOUR HAIR IF HER OWN IS LOOKIN BUSTED!!!

 

[tenderheaded]

I do everything myself. 2 years ago I thought I'd found the perfect stylist, but she kept wanting to cut, saying "your hair will split all the way up the shaft if you don't cut". She got mad on my 2nd visit and started raking the comb thur my hair and shoulders.

Now I do everything at my leisure, without clothes

 

[SkinnyMocah]

My last visit to a salon was a tragic one. The woman who was supposed to do my hair went out of town and out of desperation I sat in another woman's chair. I figured that since everyone's hair who went to the shop was long and flawless, it wouldn't matter who did it ...WRONG!!! That ***** used $3.99 FABULAXER on my hair instead of the MIZANI that was advertized. Then after washing, she began styling my hair WITHOUT DEEP CONDITIONING. Then she had the nerve to say that I shouldn't have stretched my relaxers (I did a 5 mth stretch) and she "trimmed" 3 INCHES off!!! I asked for a blow out and press, do you know this ***** took a pic attachment to my wet hair. Tears slid down my cheeks as I felt more of my hair break off and hit the floor. To finish it off, she took some grease and a marcel iron and pressed it out, my hair never felt so awful.

Oh my! I'd cry too!

I actually stopped mid appointment the last time I went to a regular salon. I didn't like her attitude and I didn't like how she was yanking the comb through my hair. I had a lot of new growth and she was just grumbling and sucking her teeth and *sigh*ing, so said 'ya know what? STOP.' Got up out of my chair, grabbed my purse, said 'no thank you' and walked right out. Have never been back. Everyone was watching me walk out and I heard someone ask 'what happened?' and she said something I didn't hear and the owner said 'SO??'

I went to a salon across the street and got a relaxer and made sure they knew why I was there. If I will get up and walk out of a movie, you can rest assured I will get up and walk out of a salon! And you want $65 for that? How about no!?

 

[GoldenBreeze]

Oh my! I'd cry too!

I actually stopped mid appointment the last time I went to a regular salon. I didn't like her attitude and I didn't like how she was yanking the comb through my hair. I had a lot of new growth and she was just grumbling and sucking her teeth and *sigh*ing, so said 'ya know what? STOP.' Got up out of my chair, grabbed my purse, said 'no thank you' and walked right out. Have never been back. Everyone was watching me walk out and I heard someone ask 'what happened?' and she said something I didn't hear and the owner said 'SO??'

I went to a salon across the street and got a relaxer and made sure they knew why I was there. If I will get up and walk out of a movie, you can rest assured I will get up and walk out of a salon! And you want $65 for that? How about no!?

I am so with you on this. There is no way that I will sit in a chair and PAY for anyone to abuse my hair and ignore my wishes.

 

[grnidmonster]

I do my own NOW. But before when I was mid back, I started at abouve sholder length because I tore my hair up while in college-self relaxers, comb blow dryer attachment, curling iron.....

Anyway I had the best Stylist but she was crazy, I mean crazy. She was gentle and knew how to treat my hair. She did what I called "micro trims" . I loved her. She grew my hair to midback in two years. Long healthy hair. Then, she went to jail-writing bad checks . I went to another Stylist in her salon, she said she knew exactly what to do-I should have known better-she had a busted blond, fingerwave wig!!! That flippin fool cut my hair to shoulder length-bone straight. The kicker was that the left side was two inches shorter than the right

I vowed never again. I recently taught myself how to rollerset. First one was a NIGHTMARE but, they have gotten better each time since. I also just learned to trim on my own. things are going good. I can press like my Mama now, flat iron like a champ. I usually airdry, pincurl or flat iron and use satin coved sponge rollers.

Kini-if I can do it, I know you can.

 

[Creatividual]

I just decided to start doing my own relaxers from here on out b/c I wasn't satisfied with results I was getting. And I feel that nobody is going to have completely invested in my hair as I am going to be. And a lot of hair dressers I do NOT trust with my hair.

 

[Divine Inspiration]

Hmm,well i pincurl at night now sometimes to maintain my rollersets.

But how do you propose drying it after a wash? Do you dry with pincurls? Or, you mean airdry in a ponytail.... then pincurl to get the fullness/body?

You could let it dry hanging loose or you could band it. A ponytail would work too. Then once it's completely dry, you can add a little leave-in and pincurl it and voila! Lots of soft waves and curls, just like a rollerset.

 

[sherann]

I am just starting back on doing everything myself. I just realized that after 1.5 years of going to the same stylist faithfully, my hair is in the same state because of how she treats it. I've bought the Affirm fiberguard system and a year from now, I'l be able to tell if it was just my hair or her methods.

 

[LawyerBarbie07]

I just hit BS after my touchup and I havent been to the hairdresser since I was about 12 (im 24 now). I did go once to get streaks in my hair a year ago and it broke off so much that I remebered why I dont go to the hairdresser. Tiny combs, yanking at the hair, no deep conditioning and big chops without my consent have made it so that I refuse to go anywhere but my own kitchen. I am considering going to the beauty academy for a set but I'm trying to work up my courage to do that!

 

[thiccknlong]

I'm texlaxed. And I naturally have "tangling" hair. Now add extra hard tap water to the mix. Then add an impatient stylist. My hair gets straight up matted, not tangled, matted. And much breakage.

To eliviate, I
1. buy bottled water to wash my hair (water softener here i come !)
2. Wash my own hair ( self relaxing here I come )
3. use only detangling products

The last time (7 wks ago ) I tried a stylist, that ***** left it on my hair to long , that ***** ! She ruined a full year of careful detangling that has taken me 2 hours to detangle, yes I have sit and taken 2 hours to detangle, just to save strands and have the thick hair I wanted. Ole girl took care of that.

Now I'm sitting here with NG scare to get another perm . But, I do it myself to

1. Save every strand (so i think)
2. use a bunch of conditioner from root to tip
3. Get more done - while the conditioner is on, I can go online, watch my dvd, and even sleep while my conditioner is on, talk about saving time
4. save gas $, 35 bucks a week for a set
5. no hustle and bustle to get to the appt
6. no waiting 2 hours just to get in the chair, another hr while she goes to mcdonalds to get a burger
7. no getting mad cause she is not doing what i asked her, and i'm paying her

Bottom line, my hair is thicker, longer, healthier with me doing it than it has EVER been in my entire life.

The work has spoken for itself.

Now, if I could get that Affirm with fiberguard perm and self relax, it would be on !!!

 

[MrsHouston]

I do my own hair and it's BSL. I've learned to roller set and flat iron pretty well. Salons are just too harsh and the money I save goes to buying more quality products, rollers, styling aids, etc. I haven't been to a salon in 8 mos, however I'm planning to visit one this week for a flat iron for my baby shower.

Kini, I think with practice and patience you'll get the hang of roller setting. The key is to use a little tension while rolling the hair to tighten your roots. I use large pink rollers w/the pins or claps. Also make sure your hair stays wet, you may have to re-wet it again w/ a spray bottle. I also love using foam setting lotion...provides more body.

Another option since you have a dryer, would be to comb your hair straight and sit under the dryer...drying it straight down. Once dry, add your products and pin curl. I have a PIBBS dryer and I love doing my roller sets.

I used a texture softner on my hair after a 7 mon stretch, so it's very wavy at the roots and I'm still able to roller set it...so I know you can do it w/ relaxed hair. Just take your time and be patience at first, don't get frustrated if it doesn't turn out right the first time. Practice, Practice, Practice, you'll be proud of yourself for becoming self-sufficient.

 

[Vshanell]

I do everything myself. I just don't trust the stylists to detangle my hair as careful as I do......actually I don't trust them to do anything because they just don't care as deeply as we do.

 

[honeybadgirl]

Awww, Guesswho, I didnt mean to make anyone feel excluded! Im sorry!

In retrospect, i should have just asked EVERYONE, not just BSL and longer. Im sure this is an issue that we ALL deal with, and i really do welcome all opinions.

Im gonna go add an edit to my original post.

oh..well in that case... .......
i agree with you. although i am apl i dont like how rough shampoo girls are on my hair. i cringe at every single snap and pop i hear when they're combing thru my wet,curly, natural hair! i do prefer to do my own hair because i can go at my own pace and i actually enjoy doing my own hair.

 

[Deszdamona]

I've always for the most part done my own hair and it's been long since I can remember, but when I was mid-back, I wished for someone to do it but couldn't afford it(the longer the hair, the mo money). Rollersetting would kill my arms and back. But, I forgot to add, on special occasions when I would go to the salon they were so rough it would bring tears to my eyes and I wouldn't say anything because I was always told: "You're just tenderheaded"--like it's just me! Don't want to hijack the thread and I know this is not what Kini was speaking of, but I wonder if there is something to long hair and tenderheadedness?? Anyways, those stylist are just trying to get to the next client.

 

[cheetarah1980]

I've always for the most part done my own hair and it's been long since I can remember, but when I was mid-back, I wished for someone to do it but couldn't afford it(the longer the hair, the mo money). Rollersetting would kill my arms and back. But, I forgot to add, on special occasions when I would go to the salon they were so rough it would bring tears to my eyes and I wouldn't say anything because I was always told: "You're just tenderheaded"--like it's just me! Don't want to hijack the thread and I know this is not what Kini was speaking of, but I wonder if there is something to long hair and tenderheadedness?? Anyways, those stylist are just trying to get to the next client.

vita, I totally understand where you're coming from. While I haven't had anyone wash or detangle my hair for me since I've been natural (wait scratch that, one person and she was totally gentle and awesome), I have had several people braid or unbraid my hair. It's not just you. People are rough and heavy handed and when you say something to them about it they act like it's your fault. When I do my hair there isn't any pulling and ripping, so I know that it's not necessary when styling my hair. But try telling the stylist to handle your hair differently because they are hurting you and breaking your hair and all they say is, "you're just tender headed." B.S.!!! I've even given braiders/unbraiders a spray bottle to wet my hair down to make it easier to get through tangles. That bottle just sits there and they never use it. People are lazy and they don't care if you have a bunch of broken off pieces of hair all over your shoulders. I'm pretty lazy when it comes to my hair, but even laziness will not allow me to endure a stylist's mistreatment of my hair ever again. I've been thinking about going to the salon to get some comb coils done. After reading this thread I have the confidence to get up and walk out if the stylist refuses to listen to my requests and does anything I feel uncomfortable with.

 

[Kimberly]

I'm far from BSL but the last time I went to the DS, the shampoo girl kept swirling my hair on top of my head and then "detangled" with the smallest tooth comb imaginable from roots to end and then had the nerve to ask me why my hair was LOOSE!!! My hair was not "loose", she was pulling it out! I never lose hair like that when I wash it myself.

Since, I went to one of those chains for a wash, DC, and a flat-iron. It turned out pretty well. No pressure to trim. The girl was quick. Didn't complain about my newgrowth. And I have gone to the cosmotology class at the high school across the street from where I live. They charge $5 plus $10 for the DC. I take my CHI flat-iron because the first time, they used theirs and it was puffy but not so that I couldn't work with it. I came home and silk-wrapped it and it turned out pretty well. At the school, I make sure to tell them that I need the moisturizing stuff. I make sure I get a DC under the dryer for at least 20 minutes. I have them dry me under the hooded dry with my hair straight down. I make sure they use a heat protectant. Then I come home and wrap it.

Last year, I had planned to teach myself to rollerset this year...but I had a devastating "trimming" mishap that had me up all night on the forum crying my eyes out. Now, I'm just trying to maintain the health of my hair and get my length back so I do a lot of bunning and I've re-committed myself to my topical growth aids.

I guess in my rambling what I am trying to say is no one is going to care for your hair the way you do BUT if you do go to a salon be proactive and not afraid to speak up. You pay them. They work for you. If they can not do it the way you want them to do it, you fire them as you would anyone else working for you that does not do their job properly. You really can't beat $15 at the DS (I paid $20 because I would insist...and had to INSIST on the DC). Take your own detangling comb. Offer to detangle it yourself before she starts rolling it. I love to go to the salon for the pampering. I have known people who could do their own hair and it looks as good or better than a salon style. Unfortunately, I am not one of those people. But I don't think that anyone should be dependent on a salon.

Sorry for rambling...

 

[Andreainnis]

Wow Kini, I'm so surprised that you continue to go & experience roughness & more than necessary hair loss! I always wondered about your salon experiences when I read your post. As much as I hate to self relax & rollerset, I can't stand another episode of someone ripping through my hair w/a fine tooth comb while damp w/no product in it!:-(( It makes me so sad and for the life of me I can't figure out why PROFESSIONAL hair care specialists don't know how to treat hair to achieve optimal health & growth! ....Except for a weave, I will never step foot in a salon for any service hoping that they may just do the right thing this time!

 

[bellesocialite]

I do my hair myself. Not even because I am the most gentle with my hair but I never have gone to a stylist for maintenance . My mother does her hair herself so naturally, I do mine myself also. The first time someone told me she went to the salon weekly I was so dumbfounded. My mother always did my hair so hearing someone didn't take care for their hair themselves, I thought it was the strangest thing LOL

 

[darkangel25]

I do it all myself. Nobody is putting their hands up in my hair... not even my mother, because I love her, but she is too rough.

 

[Puddles]

[SIZE=+1] I checked other....because I do both.
I try to go to the Salon twice a month....but most likely make it just once a month[/SIZE]