Best Cities For Black Women To Date Inter-racially?

L

L.Brown1114

Well-Known Member
So I'm 28 and ready to settle down. Question now is where? Every time I look up best places for black women to date it's always African american heavy AND segregated. I don't care what race you are as long as you are attractive to me, a good heart, and a nice person. Funny and with a personality wouldn't hurt either lol.

Any who, I figured maybe you guys are in one and could share where you met or have friends that are in one and could tell me where they live? Or maybe live or visited somewhere where you see it all the time?

I have no problem dating black men, I just don't want to be someplace where that's my ONLY option. I don't want to limit myself to one race in the quest of finding my future partner and my future partner finding me

ps: please no "you shouldnt move to find a man" I move ALLLLL the time. I'm a nomad. I'll move simply because I'm bored. Moving isn't a big deal to me, and I'm hoping to find a guy to travel with me as well.
 
Crackers Phinn said:
I see more BWWM couples in Denver than I do in Los Angeles where I live. It could be tourists but it's one of the few places that I've been to where we aren't the only couple that look like us in any random crowded restaurant.
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I've heard of Denver being really good for black women to date outside their race. The ONLY reason I'm afraid to go is altitude sickness. The reason I'm afraid is because altitude sickness makes it hard to breathe and I have a panic disorder. I would need to be on valium 24/7 for however long it would take to get used to it. I'm TERRIFIED of that place. To physically not be able to breath well but not be able to convince myself it's all in my head because this times it's not scares the crap out of me!!!!
 
Any city where there are white men. Which is pretty much any major city...or am I missing something?

In regards to Denver, I wouldn't suggest it. A lot of the BW/WM pairings are more novelty than long lasting relationships (from what I have seen/experienced). In addition some of the women are dating down just to get a WM.

Men are men everwhere.
 
RocStar said:
Any city where there are white men. Which is pretty much any major city...or am I missing something?

In regards to Denver, I wouldn't suggest it. A lot of the BW/WM pairings are more novelty than long lasting relationships (from what I have seen/experienced). In addition some of the women are dating down just to get a WM.

Men are men everwhere.
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Funny thing: Back in the 90's when black women were encouraged to move to Atlanta because the sidewalks were paved with genteel black husbands nobody was talking about men are men everywhere. Up until a few years ago moving south was offered as conventional wisdom on this board to bw because Southern black men make better husbands and folks ate it up without nary a pinch of "men are men everywhere."

From the threads I read here and on the other board where celebrity pictures are borrowed from there's plenty of bw dating down just to get a bm so at least the dating patterns are consistant.
 
Crackers Phinn said:
Funny thing: Back in the 90's when black women were encouraged to move to Atlanta because the sidewalks were paved with genteel black husbands nobody was talking about men are men everywhere. Up until a few years ago moving south was offered as conventional wisdom on this board to bw because Southern black men make better husbands and folks ate it up without nary a pinch of "men are men everywhere."

From the threads I read here and on the other board where celebrity pictures are borrowed from there's plenty of bw dating down just to get a bm so at least the dating patterns are consistant.
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I was specifically referring to white men when I said "men are men everywhere." Yes, in the 90's people would talk about moving to ATL for a BLACK husband. And people talk about the South because there seemed to be a bigger pool of BLACK men to select from.

I should have said "white men are white men everywhere."
 
I second Denver. Denver is a cool city, but non hipster white people move to places like that to get away from black people. Lol.

I had lots of non black men hit on me when I went to Minneapolis, but I would never live there. Lol.

I've seen 50+ year old black women dating IR all over North Florida.....not necessarily Jax, but St. Augs, Fernandina, Fleming Island...pretty much Clay County. I see younger couples in Jax, but I wouldn't necessarily move here to date/marry as a primary reason, though I did meet my SO here after moving around a bunch.
 
RocStar said:
I was specifically referring to white men when I said "men are men everywhere." Yes, in the 90's people would talk about moving to ATL for a BLACK husband. And people talk about the South because there seemed to be a bigger pool of BLACK men to select from.

I should have said "white men are white men everywhere."
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There assumption was that a bigger pool of black men who were culturally predisposed to get married in the south or at least that was the rumor. Trust me bw weren't moving from Detroit/Chicago/Toledo/LA to ATL because their hometowns ran out of black men. No, those women went looking for a specific type of black man. The premise of this thread is based on relocating to a place where there's at least anectdotal evidence that IR dating is an option.

Having been to Tupelo Mississippi last year I can say with great certainty that the men there in all of their Elvis worshipping glory are not looking for a Black Priscilla but Denver and LA are much more likely.

I've lived in Los Angeles county for 26 years, I ain't NEVAH met nan white man here like I met in Mississippi. Not NAN. I'm not quite convinced that they speak English.
 
L.Brown1114 said:
All races. Hispanics and Filipinos are my jam as well
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Where I live in the Bay Area, there are some Filipino men who date/marry BW. A BW I went to HS with is married to a Filipino woman and they have a daughter. From peeking on his FB page some of his friends have black wives too. But the Bay Area is super expensive to live in. Housing prices are ridiculous.
 
healthyhair2 said:
New York City minus Staten Island which can be a little bit more segregated. Toronto, Canada too. I found the educated White men plentiful. Speaking as a Black woman, who dates white men they are NOT the same everywhere. I have lived in the South, Northeast and the West Coast.
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Yess people don’t understand that different states, regions, cities , do not produce the same type of white man regardless if you live amongst them or not. So you vote for NYC? Do you live there? I’m actually moving there in a few weeks. I heard it was segregated and the few times I’ve visited it has been minus Manhattan but I figure they are tourists like me. I plan on giving NYC 2 years. If that doesn’t work out I wanted to get my masters in Europe!! Copenhagen was my first choice. Women rule the dating world there. My good friend is from there. Wemen can sleep with a guy on the first date and HE asks what you want from this lol. A girl could get used to that
 
L.Brown1114 said:
Yess people don’t understand that different states, regions, cities , do not produce the same type of white man regardless if you live amongst them or not. So you vote for NYC? Do you live there? I’m actually moving there in a few weeks. I heard it was segregated and the few times I’ve visited it has been minus Manhattan but I figure they are tourists like me. I plan on giving NYC 2 years. If that doesn’t work out I wanted to get my masters in Europe!! Copenhagen was my first choice. Women rule the dating world there. My good friend is from there. Wemen can sleep with a guy on the first date and HE asks what you want from this lol. A girl could get used to that
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I went to Sweden five years ago and my black female friends told me the same thing, women sleep with men on the first date and then men will ask what is it that they want to do from there. I was considered a prude when I went out one evening and this hunky guy was really checking me out big time and my friends from there were like go for it, we will pick you up in the morning. I was like uh no thanks I can't get down like that. The only thing I didn't like was that its considered normal to binge drink and then sleep around and Swedish men are a lot more forgiving about sleep with them on a first date and being drunk, however that isn't for me.

Best,
Almond Eyes
 
almond eyes said:
I went to Sweden five years ago and my black female friends told me the same thing, women sleep with men on the first date and then men will ask what is it that they want to do from there. I was considered a prude when I went out one evening and this hunky guy was really checking me out big time and my friends from there were like go for it, we will pick you up in the morning. I was like uh no thanks I can't get down like that. The only thing I didn't like was that its considered normal to binge drink and then sleep around and Swedish men are a lot more forgiving about sleep with them on a first date and being drunk, however that isn't for me.

Best,
Almond Eyes
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Lol that would be freeing to me. I hate how non progressive our country is as a whole. The dating life here does not cater to women at all. Sure I can play games but instead of getting to know you and deciding if I even like you myself I have to calculate when to text back. I mean it’s great that the guy likes me now but when do I get to develop feelings. It’s exhausting
 
L.Brown1114 said:
Yess people don’t understand that different states, regions, cities , do not produce the same type of white man regardless if you live amongst them or not. So you vote for NYC? Do you live there? I’m actually moving there in a few weeks. I heard it was segregated and the few times I’ve visited it has been minus Manhattan but I figure they are tourists like me. I plan on giving NYC 2 years. If that doesn’t work out I wanted to get my masters in Europe!! Copenhagen was my first choice. Women rule the dating world there. My good friend is from there. Wemen can sleep with a guy on the first date and HE asks what you want from this lol. A girl could get used to that
Click to expand...

Not currently living there, but I did for 20 years. Usually, I'm in New York for two weeks at a time, 3 times a year. I've also lived in L.A. , Atlanta and Toronto. I've been down South for almost 6 years but plan on moving. I personally met a lot of different people , but I think it depends on where you go. I started out living in Manhattan, then moved to Brooklyn. I think that segregation most places is socioeconomic . Listen, I love New York City but if you have a chance to move to Europe, OMgee....GO!!!
 
L.Brown1114 said:
Lol that would be freeing to me. I hate how non progressive our country is as a whole. The dating life here does not cater to women at all. Sure I can play games but instead of getting to know you and deciding if I even like you myself I have to calculate when to text back. I mean it’s great that the guy likes me now but when do I get to develop feelings. It’s exhausting
Click to expand...

Yeah, especially for those of us over 35, dating nowadays can be hell. I went on a date last year. He was nice, but boring and not my type. He also talked about himself the whole time. After that I said f%&k it!!!
 
almond eyes said:
I went to Sweden five years ago and my black female friends told me the same thing, women sleep with men on the first date and then men will ask what is it that they want to do from there. I was considered a prude when I went out one evening and this hunky guy was really checking me out big time and my friends from there were like go for it, we will pick you up in the morning. I was like uh no thanks I can't get down like that. The only thing I didn't like was that its considered normal to binge drink and then sleep around and Swedish men are a lot more forgiving about sleep with them on a first date and being drunk, however that isn't for me.

Best,
Almond Eyes
Click to expand...

Yes, Swedish people are more open. A Swedish friend of mine had a hard time dating American men when she lived here because she couldn't understand why she had to go out on a date before getting some. She was used to drinking and hooking up randomly. She ran through a huge number of men in our Salsa circles and the guys were puzzled as to why she wasn't asking for a commitment. She didn't discriminate on race either. I went to a party with her once and she casually pointed out 10 guys she'd been with. The South African dude did black people a disservice as to how badly he performed and excessively sweated heavily all over her and her sheets. I know him and can't look him in the face without dying laughing.

She also talked about how Swedes are cool with nudity. Every Xmas, she went home with whoever she was dating at the time. On Dec 26th, they would get together with her friends in the Jacuzzi all nude , and have drinks and catch up since they live in different parts of the world. It was co-ed and no sex was involved. She complained that American men are so insecure and wrapped up in the size of their peens and are so jealous if another guy sees his woman naked. Being naked is no big deal. My prudish self kept her mouth shut.
 
okange76 said:
Yes, Swedish people are more open. A Swedish friend of mine had a hard time dating American men when she lived here because she couldn't understand why she had to go out on a date before getting some. She was used to drinking and hooking up randomly. She ran through a huge number of men in our Salsa circles and the guys were puzzled as to why she wasn't asking for a commitment. She didn't discriminate on race either. I went to a party with her once and she casually pointed out 10 guys she'd been with. The South African dude did black people a disservice as to how badly he performed and excessively sweated heavily all over her and her sheets. I know him and can't look him in the face without dying laughing.

She also talked about how Swedes are cool with nudity. Every Xmas, she went home with whoever she was dating at the time. On Dec 26th, they would get together with her friends in the Jacuzzi all nude , and have drinks and catch up since they live in different parts of the world. It was co-ed and no sex was involved. She complained that American men are so insecure and wrapped up in the size of their peens and are so jealous if another guy sees his woman naked. Being naked is no big deal. My prudish self kept her mouth shut.
Click to expand...

I kind of like this.
I don't know if I'll ever be that free though.
 
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